Tired of people making me feel bad about Lily

[catmandu]

Dont listen to these people! The joy that two cats living together can bring each other is worth any cost or trouble. All Animals want another of thier own kind to be with , and to share thier love!Best wishes from the lost Cat Hotel!

[aguu]

Don't listen to them.
Listen to your heart.
It's not "yours" - it's "theirs".
People who do not understand cannot be made to - just do as you have been - don't talk to them about it.
Talk to us here at PT - we ALL understand!!
I have also learned this lesson - I work with people who are all dog owners - some have multiple dogs and are NUTS about them. And yet when I speak of my cats - they look at me like I'm nuts and look down their noses. Screw them!
I am so richly rewarded by having Mishki in my life, I really don't care what others think.
I am going through a very difficult and painful time in my life and he makes it bearable and quite possibly already has saved it in one way or another.
Lily is SO BEAUTIFUL. She will undoubtedly enrich your and Luna's lives. You'll see.
Personally I don't trust people who do not like animals or who don't think they should be treated with love and caring.
To me animals are proof that God exists - especially something as beautiful and complex as a Cat or Kitten!!

[sasvermont]

Oh don't listen to those silly folks.

Lily will be fine and will get over being outside. I let Juni run around a few times outside - I think all cats get out once in awhile.

You can pick your friends, but you cannot pick your relatives.

We all love Luna and Lily here....really.....

SAS

[ScantyNebula]

I had your problem too, Kirsten, BUT I decided not to listen, because I wanted another cat, and I got one. You need to do the same. You need to do this for youself, and we all know you want Lily.

I was talking to mom a few nights ago, and I mentioned to her that I might bring Toby to the vet because he breaths fast sometimes and pants, and I'm worried it may be something serious. She was all like "Oh...its the just the heat. Don't waste your money" I said, Yes, It may be the heat but I want to check him out to be safe. Then she said "Well sure if something does happen that you can't afford thats all you can do, its only a cat. " Its always about the money .. she doesn't understand that I would spend as much money as I could to help one of my cats if they ever got sick. I KNOW if my parents ever got a cat, they would probably let it roam free outside, and if the cat ever got sick, they would "maybe" take it to the vet and if they had to pay over 200 dollars on him, they would probably put him to sleep first. And I am sure of this.

Some people just don't think pets are as important as we do =/ It's sad.

[Cataholic]

I think it is hard when you are passionate about something, like pets, to deal with those that aren't passionate. Our feelings are ultra sensitive, and theirs are not sensitive. So, it isn't like you are starting at 0 and getting to 5. You are starting at -5 and getting to 5- a broader range.

Do what is in your heart. I am sure you can look at each person that is critical and think of something they do that you don't agree with. I guess I do wonder why one would subject themselves to people who make uncaring remarks. I don't say to excommunicate your entire family based on one errant comment about your cats...but, continual comments? Family, friends, co-workers,etc., aren't people that care about you if they continuously make uncaring remarks about ANYTHING you are passionate about. To me, those are toxic people. Let them be. I can't imagine making disparaging commments to someone I love about one of their passions. An offhand comment? One made in anger? One made without thinking? Of course, we all make mistakes. But, that doesn't seem to be what you write of.

Maybe, Kirsten, instead of talking/listening to these people, and becoming upset, you might think about why you are subjecting yourself to this type of behavior, and make some positive change. You can't keep doing the same thing and expect different results. I am not meaning this meanly. But, to know these people upset you, and it relates to kitties, upsets me.

[Kirsten]

Thanks for your comments everyone! You made some very good points and I will think about it.

You're definitely right that I should learn not to talk to everybody about my cats (it's just hard because they are one of my favourite subjects to talk about ). I know I'm doing what I think is the best for my kitties, and that's why I can't wait to finally get Lily, 'cause IMO there are so many dangers waiting for a kitten in the place where she is now (not that she isn't in good care, but there's a balcony without a net, open windows, a pond in the neighbors's garden etc...).

I can also see from many comments here there seem to be many people in this world who don't share our love and passion, and I think it's just disappointing because an animal is a living creature like we are, so it just deserves the same respect. Well, obviously not everyone thinks like that!

ScantyNebula, that was very hurtful comment by your mother (mine would probably have said the same) and I really hope hope Toby is alright and it's really "only" the heat!
So many people with pets are the way you described your mother (if she had a cat). The friend who made that comment about Lily also has cats; she loves them but is very careless IMO. Her comment is "Well, they have to make their own experiences" and "a cat has a great ability of self-healing"... Well, okay... :\

I think what disappoints me most is that these hurtful comments are also a statement of intolerance in general. For example I'm not the biggest dog person in the world, but I have a friend who loves dogs and has one, and we have long conversations about this and I find it interesting what she has to say. When I talk to someone, especially a friend, and I see there is something that's important to that peson, I think it's not too much to at least try to share or understand his point of view. IMO, this has a lot to do with respecting each other. And every time I hear these thoughtless comments - cat-related or not - I think there is something wrong with the world of today...

Kirsten

[slick]

In my life I have a variety of friends and a couple of them are not pet-lovers and certainly I have many, many family members that are not pet-lovers. However a true friend, pet-lover or not, will stand by any decisions you make and be happy for you. As for me, I just ignore the snide remarks and chalk it up to ignorance on their part. I'm sorry you've been going through this, but it seems to me that Lily belongs with you and I encourage you to listen to your heart and do what you think is right. We will back you up all the way. When Lily gets settled into a indoor routine she will be sooooo happy and the love you get back will seem twice what you can give.

[catland]

Regarding the comment about "she's been outside - you can't make her be an indoor cat now" - this is not accurate. Three years ago, when our cat had a litter of kittens, one went to my husband's aunt. I knew that she lived on a busy street and therefore was not going to allow the kitty to go outside. This kitten was allowed outside with her brothers before she went to her forever home.

While I had mixed feelings because I allow my own cats to go outside, I knew that the kitten would have a good life. She has - she's the ultimate spoiled rotten princess.

[carole]

Firstly lily is BEAUTIFUL, and anyone who tells you different is either blind, or plain arrogant.

I can only commend you for taking such wonderful care of your pets, having burning candles around cat's is very dangerous, a disabled man sure learned that, his pet cat, knocked them over and the house caught alight, he made it out , but sadly his cat did not. He was left with nothing and the sad loss of his pet.

Don't pay any attention to these mindless comment's, and continue to do what you believe in, and what is best for your pet's, beside's it's NONE OF THEIR BUSINESS.

[Kirsten]

He was left with nothing and the sad loss of his pet.

What a nightmare!!! That poor man, and the poor kitty!

Kirsten

[Cataholic]

Originally posted by Kirsten

I think what disappoints me most is that these hurtful comments are also a statement of intolerance in general. For example I'm not the biggest dog person in the world, but I have a friend who loves dogs and has one, and we have long conversations about this and I find it interesting what she has to say. When I talk to someone, especially a friend, and I see there is something that's important to that peson, I think it's not too much to at least try to share or understand his point of view. IMO, this has a lot to do with respecting each other. And every time I hear these thoughtless comments - cat-related or not - I think there is something wrong with the world of today...

Kirsten

And that, Kirsten, is what makes you different from others. You focus on the person and their passion, and let it matter to you, because the person matters to you. I don't think that is a trait one is taught. It is just something inside of you.

Intolerance- be it of animals, humans, points of view...whatever, is the greatest divider of people.

[dragonchilde]

Definitely don't let them tell you she won't be happy as an indoor kitty.

Up until she started having urination problems (not related to being indoors, but rather to the move), Minette was an outdoor-turned-indoor kitty.

She was an outdoor kitty for the first one and a half years of her life, and when my husband and I took an apartment, she was indoor only of necessity, because the apartment was right on a very busy road, and she is not a very smart kitty. She was perfectly happy being indoors, and in fact never pined for the outside.

She did get a little fat, but that's because we spoiled her. When we got Wobbles, she lost weight because they'd chase each other around.

[RogueFerret]

My mother will not even come to my house because the though of having a cat in the house freaks her out. When we got Natasha, which was cat number 3 in the house at the time, my mother told me that my house would stink and that the nasy kitten would get on the counter and blah, blah, blah. She said the same thing about the ferrets. But she has five dogs and thats okay. Go figure.

Anyways, I just ignore her, and take it as a blessing that she doesn't come to my house.

Don't listen to anyone else because you are the one who takes care of the cats and quite fankly, it's none of their bussiness.

[Killearn Kitties]

This is such a shame. People can be so great with advice on subjects they know absolutely nothing about, can't they? It will be good for Luna to have Lily's company. It's good for them to have another cat's company, particularly indoor cats.

I'm certainly looking forward to the day you can take beautiful little Lily home and we can see lots more pictures of her!