Dearest Mabel, a.k.a. May Belle, Maple, Missy Thing, Coyote Girl, Supermodel, what a marvelous lady you are! You're absolutely beautiful, with that colorful fur that looks so soft, and that sweet face with those fluffy, perky ears and lovely big dark-brown eyes looking right up at me. And what a delightful personality you have! You're full of energy and make your dear people smile with your antics. You're a real talker, and you love to go for car rides with your head out the window. You and your sister Lucille have good times in Mexico and the California desert. You have a very important job, patrolling the perimeter of whatever area you're in. At home you're pretty easy-going, though when you want something, you're very outspoken telling your people what it is. You enjoy treats and butt scratching and tug-of-war and "puppa love." You and they all love each other very much, don't you. What a wonderful love-filled home you share!
Congratulations, darling Mabel, on being chosen Dog of the Day! We hope you and your dear Lucille and people and all your family and friends are enjoying a fine celebration full of fun and lovies and all your favorite games and treats and butt-scratches and tug-of-war and an extra-special session of "puppa love!"
I meant," said Ipslore bitterly, "what is there in this world that truly makes living worthwhile?"
Death thought about it.
CATS, he said eventually. CATS ARE NICE.
-- Terry Pratchett (1948—2015), Sourcery
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