Dearest Zane, you are absolutely stunning! What a beautiful Guinea Pig you are, with that colorful fur that looks so soft, and that sweet face with those lovely big dark eyes. You have a terrific story to tell! You were a trick eighth-birthday present for your dear young friend-to-be. He/she and parents went to Petsmart, supposedly to buy cat food but really to get you! Your age is unknown but your friend thinks you're "still kinda a baby." You're the other family guinea pig's "little brother," even though they got you first! You're very fast and love to run around your cage. You love to purr (though you're afraid of the other two cats). You're shy sometimes, and sometimes you like to be around people. You're not shy when food is being served! You and your friend love each other very much, don't you. What a wonderful love-filled home you share!
Congratulations, darling Zane, on being chosen Pet of the Day! We hope you and your dear brother piggy and young friend and kitties and all your family and friends are enjoying a fine celebration, full of fun and lovies and all your favorite games and treats and a special serving of cucumber!
I meant," said Ipslore bitterly, "what is there in this world that truly makes living worthwhile?"
Death thought about it.
CATS, he said eventually. CATS ARE NICE.
-- Terry Pratchett (1948—2015), Sourcery
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