Dearest Igor, you are adorable indeed, so beautiful with that golden shell! I'm so sorry about your lonely earlier life, and I'm glad things have changed so much for the better. Now you are living the delightful life you deserve and were meant to live, with your dear turtle girlfriend Izzy and human friend Ben. Soon you and Izzy will be hibernating. You all love each other very much, don't you. What a wonderful love-filled home you share!
Congratulations, darling Igor, on being chosen Pet of the Day! We hope you and dear Izzy and Ben and all your family and friends are enjoying a fine celebration, full of fun and lovies and all your favorite games and treats, with a special serving of earthworms, carrots, lettuce, fish, and apples.
I meant," said Ipslore bitterly, "what is there in this world that truly makes living worthwhile?"
Death thought about it.
CATS, he said eventually. CATS ARE NICE.
-- Terry Pratchett (1948—2015), Sourcery
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