I'm so mad I'm so mad I'm so mad

[Pinot's Mom]

I cannot post this anywhere but here, because FB is too public....I'm so mad!!! My husband's sister and her husband have been leading him around by the nose for ten years. They promised at the beginning of the year to make it stop, they've had meetings planned for the last eight months to report on the progress, and today they finally met. THEY HAVE NO INTENTION OF MAKING THIS MADNESS END!!

Short version-some of you I think know...family house co-owned by three siblings since parents deceased...in NC, 7 1/2 hours away, we have no desire to have anything to do with said house, nor have we - ever. We have said since day one we want it sold or to be bought out. The 'market is not right' has been said forever. WHO CARES??? WE DIDN'T BUY IT!!! We just want to be out of a business deal with people we don't trust! They say they're going to lose money - HOW CAN YOU LOSE MONEY WHEN YOU DIDN'T BUY IT???

They said they would write a check and buy us out - again. The meeting today revealed, once again, THEY LIED. They have no intention of doing what they promised - AGAIN!!

I try not to have the capacity to hate, but these two are making it very difficult. Oh, and by the way, they say we're greedy because we want the money. NO, IDIOTS, you're just controlling (they're the 'managers' of this beach house) a financial aspect of our lives and we don't trust you!!

Thanks for the rant....

[pomtzu]

UGH - that sucks. What a lousy position to be in, and it's not even your doing!

I'm glad my parents didn't have a whole lot to leave. Dad passed and the house went to Mom (in Jamestown). She sold it and moved down here and bought a mobile home and put on my property. By the time that she passed, there wasn't enough left to fight over - not that my brothers would have anyway.

My ex's parents left everything (quite a lot is an understatement) to their youngest child and only daughter. She didn't even need it, as she was married to an Army officer with rank, had no kids, and they were living very comfortably. It seems the parents forgot about their 6 sons, and at least half of them who could have used a little help. But far be it from me to speak up - I was only a relative by marriage.....

Anyway - isn't there some way that Coop could legally force their hand?

[Catty1]

Maybe Coop could get the 20 minutes free advice from a lawyer or a mediator? I don't think the other two know what they are doing, literally...so maybe a mediator would help.

Got any lawyer friends that could help out?

[Karen]

Rant read and acknowledged. I have no advice, but just know we do care!

[Pinot's Mom]

Unfortunately I think these two know EXACTLY what they're doing. My husband and his brother (the 3rd sibling) have allowed this crap to continue for entirely too long. Neither of the brothers wants to be in this (#3 lives in UTAH - he really has no interest). The relationship between my husband and his sister is gone. The biggest casualty is the family. His sister's husband is an opportunist and a shyster (is that a word?) who has taken this family for a ride.

[Catty1]

That is crappy!

Can you sue them?

I hope karma bites them in the butt, big and soon!

[caseysmom]

I think you can force them so sell, it may take hiring an attorney but it sounds like its worth it. Was it in probate or the house has all three of you on it?

[moosmom]

You need to get a lawyer. This is utter BS.

When my stepmother died, my father then put everything in his name and mine (cars, bank accounts, etc.), because her three useless children did nothing to help him care for her. They didn't even visit her!!! When Dad died, my youngest then step sister came outta the woodwork looking for things. My father and I talked about everything, who gets what, etc. He reiterated to me that he didn't NOT want Bab's (ugh!!) children to get any of it. Lynn came looking for her Mom's diamond engagement ring and wedding band my father had given her. I was the one who had to clean out 25 years of stuff from their apt. She was absolutely no help at all. I made her wait till AFTER I was finished cleaning to give it to her. Friends asked me why I gave her anything. I wanted nothing to do with her or her two evil sisters and knew if I had kept them, she'd nag the crap outta me.

I am so sorry you have to go through this. That's why it is SO important to have a will made. That's what I did, knowing how my family of vultures would react. Not that I have anything of value, cuz I don't.

Hang in there Pinot's mom. We're here for ya!!

[Pinot's Mom]

Thank you all. Yes, it is crappy (at best).

Candace and Ellie; you have met my husband, and would fully understand when I say this. Suing his sister, no matter their relationship status would be akin to stabbing himself in the heart. He would sooner endure (which he has) 10 years of having his words twisted, my words twisted, insults and lies hurled at him, having his spineless brother call him constantly to whine about this stupid house (that we wish would get hit by a hurricane and blow away), accusations of all kinds of things; while his sister's husband makes himself out to be a holier than thou 'Christian' who doesn't even respect our Presbyterian faith because we don't 'preach the Bible'. He has also (as has his sister) made his living through the Government, but they came up with a scheme to classify their property as 'agricultural' so they don't have to pay the taxes which paid their salaries. Coop also found, on the last statement of the beach house accounting (which B-I-L handles as 'manager') that they have been misrepresenting the earnings on the house. I have the feeling if this thing is audited, we're all in trouble, but I stay out of it. Coop's got so much to handle; the last thing he needs is a wife nagging him about this as well. I need to be a refuge in this situation. SIGH...

[Catty1]

{{{hugs}}} It as great meeting you and Coop!

You know - it might be the best thing if they did get audited. That way no family member has ratted on another and there is still an authority in charge.

Now, how to anonymously tip off the tax people...

More hugs and I hope this works out soon!

[pomtzu]

Yes Maggie - I can understand what you're saying about Coop, but after 10 years, perhaps he should reconsider those family ties and think of protecting his (and your) backside! If the handling and reporting of related issues to this beach house ever were to be audited, I have no doubt that all owners would be held accountable, and you all could indeed be in deep doo-doo!!! You and Coop have a beautiful home - is it worth even the "possibility" that you could lose it? I know it's easy for me to say this since it's not my family or my issue, but there must be something that can be done. If Coop loses his sister because of it, it will not be on his shoulders. She is the one that created the problem to start with, and continues to perpetuate it, and appears to have no regard for anyone but herself. I'd say it's time to move on. Of course - this is JMHO.

Hugs to you and Coop.........
(you don't mind my Coop hug, do you??)


ETA: Just a thought - but perhaps she doesn't want to sell the house outright, or at least buy you out, because there are less than above-board and even perhaps illegal actions related to the management, and they would surely surface during any kind of sale. Just an idea that popped into my empty head, and maybe I'm off base, but you never know.

[catland]

GET A LAWYER NOW!

I agree with the others who said to get a lawyer. Get out of this mess before it gets worse.

good luck!

oh - and try to find a book called "Boundries".

[mon]

i understand your being angry. Sounds like Coop is a gentle soul but sometimes you just have to stand up and say enough and let the chips fall where they may. Niether one of you need or deserve this kaos. Stand and deliver Coop, you can do it man

[Pinot's Mom]

Ellie, of course you can hug Coop!

Coop and I had a discussion (again) a bit ago. He said what I thought he would; I voiced my opinion on getting a lawyer, especially due to the accounting discrepancies, and he said that the bottom line is it's his sister. He was in contact today with some people to dispute their 'facts & figures'. I hope we're in the home stretch of this - it's been so long.

Thanks again for your support; it means a lot.

[Pinot's Mom]

i understand your being angry. Sounds like Coop is a gentle soul but sometimes you just have to stand up and say enough and let the chips fall where they may. Niether one of you need or deserve this kaos. Stand and deliver Coop, you can do it man

Coop is THE MOST kind and gentle soul. We're getting there...thanks.