Ellie-mae will be leaving me today....

[carole]

It is with so much sadness i tell you i will have to take Ellie to be put to sleep at 4.15pm today, Ellie was doing so great considering, the steroids were helping and she was eating right up until yesterday, yesterday was not good, she ate a small amount of food in the morning , then would not eat the rest of the day, she also just keep vomiting.She cannot even keep water down now.


I made the decision last night if there was no improvement, then i would let her go peacefully, sadly she won't eat at all, is vomiting even water up, continually going in the dirt box, doing a small pee, and trying to poo and nothing happening, she is not at all well.

I Let her out today as usual this morning and she disappeared, i never even gave it a thought ,silly me, but she took off, i found her in the neighbour's driveway, sitting hunched up looking miserable, i think she was going away to die.

I hate having to shut her in on her last day, she loves outside in the courtyard, i took her out to supervise her but she was going to take off again, of course she sure knows something is up.

I have given her a pain relief steroid this morning, even though it is on an empty stomach, i just did not know what else to do, my vet is in surgery all morning, and i so want him to be the one to let her go, he has such a bond with her and done so much for her. I think it will be sad for him too.

Please pray my ellie can be stable until then, and not in too much pain and let her go peacefully.

My heart is breaking right now, and i don't know how i will get through this day, but somehow i will have to, i know i am going to be a mess this afternoon.

I feel sick to the stomach ,knowing what lies ahead.

I also know it will be a blessing to let her go , as she is now starting to suffer, i honestly thought my girl was going to show them all they were wrong, i guess it was the calm before the storm, and at least Ellie had another week with us, and she was not too bad until yesterday.

I am worried about Nikki her daughter, how she will react, they have been together all their lives, although not very close now, i still think she will feel it and grieve for her, i just don't know what to expect.

I have attached a pic of Ellie before her illness and one taken two days ago, you can see how much weight she has lost, poor wee darling.

Well folks that is all i can write for now, my heart is heavy, my eyes filled with tears and i just cannot write about it anymore, thanks for listening and being there for me.