Dilemma - I need advice (long)

[Giselle]

So, hopefully, everybody remembers Roxy. She's Ivy's littermate that I rehomed to a family friend. Remember?


Well, just as I feared, Roxy's owner is not thrilled with her. Admittedly, Roxy had several behavioral problems - transitional SA, digging, and leash pulling. I helped train Roxy out of leash pulling, and her SA and digging subsided. But it seems like no matter how much Roxy improves, her owner (who will remain nameless) ALWAYS finds something to complain about.

We met at the dog park, and she just kept complaining about how Roxy jumps over the babygate, how she doesn't know her name, how she doesn't know "Come", etc. Then, when I comment on how quickly Roxy got over her digging problem, she kept belittling it. I told her very bluntly that these are learned behaviors and you have to teach them. I showed her the foundations of a recall and Roxy learned immediately. BUT her owner kept complaining, kept insisting that there was something inherently wrong with Roxy, etc. etc.

Then, she says, "If you happen to find another family who's interested in Roxy, I'm okay with that". .... ARRRRGHHHHHH I'm SO mad and frustrated and ANGRY that her owner isn't even willing to try, willing to give Roxy some lenience, willing to LOVE Roxy. *sigh* But she is still willing to keep Roxy for now and train her...

I don't know what to do. I don't know if I should find another home right now or if I should give Roxy's owner more time to bond with her. Any advice? This is so hard for me because I am pretty much responsible for this sweet girl =( Please, I need opinions/advice!

[crow_noir]

I'd say continue trying to work with Roxy's owner so that Roxy's life improves... In the mean time though start looking for a new home for her at your leisure. ...that way when Roxy's current owner dumps her, you won't be in a mad dash trying to find one.

[Ginger's Mom]

I agree with crow_noir. There is both good and bad in the owners complaining to you about Roxy's behavior. I know it is bothering you because you feel responsible for Roxy and for her being in that home, but part of my advice is not to take the complaints so personally and continue working with her. I remember the first few months (probably three or four) with both of my girls (RB girl and Ginger) were very difficult. It was an adjustment period for both them and for me, too. I spent a lot of time complaining to my sister about their behavior and threatening to kick them out. When I complained about Ginger, my sister reminded me that Peaches wasn't always the perfect dog that lives in my memory ( , of course she was ). And neither of my girls had really bad backgrounds to overcome. So just letting Roxy's new owner vent to someone about the problems and to keep working with her on improving the problems may be just what she needs until that bond builds. In the meantime, it probably wouldn't be a bad idea to make some inquiries and contacts with possible new owners, just to make sure that you are prepared if the owner gives up completely. How long has Roxy been in her new home? Roxy is very lucky to have an advocate like you on her side.

[Freedom]

Her owner IS bringing her to the dog park, so there ARE some things in this person's favor!!! Not everyone does that, even GOOD owners, so this person is going out of her way to do somethings for the dog.

Hey, who is wearing the e collar? I missed something!

They look like TWINS, he he.

I agree with the other posts, start looking for a great home for her NOW, while there is no rush.

[Pawsitive Thinking]

I never get over how people expect instant results with dogs. After nearly 3 years with Tobey he is still far from perfect but I wouldn't part with either of my boys.

As the others have said, keep working with the owner but keep an ear out for someone who would have the experience and patience to take proper care of Roxy's needs

[pitc9]

In my opinion, unfortunately if her owner already is negative about her I doubt she'd change her mind. It sounds like she expected a perfect dog and doesn't want to work with her to help her be the good dog that she could be.
If I were you, I'd start looking for a new home for her. At least she's not in danger and is not being abused or neglected so you can take you time in finding her a great home ... humm.. Maybe she wants to live with her sister!

I'm so sorry it didn't work out. She is such a beautiful little girl.

I wouldn't stop trying to get her owner to keep her, maybe your persistence will pay off in the end!

[BC_MoM]

Here is just a little something of my opinion.

If the owners are being so negative about Roxy, then Roxy is going to feed off of that and it will ruin any "bond" there is between them, making training between the two (or three) very difficult.

[HorseDreamer101]

I hope you dont mind me saying this, but this owner sounds like she dont like roxy and I dont this this owner deserve to have Roxy cuz she sounds like a great dog to have

[Giselle]

I agree; her owner has been pretty committed thus far. But I think pitc9 nailed it on the head- Roxy's owner acts like she was expecting a perfect dog and is now frustrated that it takes so much work to keep and train one. It just irritates me how she's so willing to give up

I'm keeping my ears out for anybody who's looking for a dog and I'm considering using a local rescue's owner assistance program, but it costs $50 dollars and they require you to send vaccination/spay records. I don't have the latter and I feel Roxy's owner should pay the former. I just don't know which option is morally right.

The situation for both Roxy and her owner is not ideal, but I'm giving them both some time to work it out. Roxy has been in her new home for about 2-3 months so the progress she's made is *amazing*. I just wish her owner would see it, too!