Do you get along with the In-laws?

[kt_luvs_kitties]

I know this is pointless, but I am curious, do you get along with your In-laws? Or does your spouse get along with your parents?

Me and my In-laws get along ok... Nothing special though. They talk about me behind my back, and when I say behind my back, I mean literally anytime they dont think I can hear them
But they are always extremely nice to my face. We have only gotten into one face to face argument in 2 years. But then again, we have only seen each other like 5 times(they live in Maryland, me in North Carolina).
They also do hurtful things, like this last Christmas they sent my husband a Christmas card with $100 dollars in it, and it read "this is for you, tell Katie that her present will be there soon, as soon as I can ship it out" BUT the present never came...Not that it matters but it hurt my feelings. The year before that they came down on Thanksgiving and bought my husband a expensive leather jacket, and gave it to him in front of me, as a early Christmas present. They never even sent me a card. I knew after Christmas the purpose of them giving him his present early, was so that they did not have to give me one. *shrugs* It just was inconsiderate. So it confuses me as to if they really like me, or are trying to be mean, without being mean.. (does that make any sense)?
My husband and my parents get along GREAT. They have never argued, and my parents treat him like family, probably better than me at times
So how about you? Do you get along with them? Please explain

[Maya & Inka's mommy]

My husband's parents died long time ago. He lost his dad when he was only 2, and his mom after we got married for only 3 weeks... . So, I am VERY sorry I never really got to know them! My mom-in-law was a real sweetheart, but by the tiùme I met her, she was so sick already.
My parents still live. My husband gets along with them, but not completely, especially not with my dad. He has a bit the same attitude as your in-laws: when my dad gives us some money or something else, he always gives it to me! He is almost 82 now, so it's to late to change

[GraciesMommy]

My husbands father died 2 months before we met, so I never got to meet him. My MIL is a great woman, she and I email several times a day and she says I am the daughter she never had. She doesnt get along AT ALL with the other daughter in law..

Now she can be a little manipulative at times, with Brad, to get her way..but can't we all? lol...

[Samantha Puppy]

We get along well but my husband and I 1) are young enough; and 2) newlywed enough, that his mother still tries to boss us around and doesn't like it when I resist. Other than that, I consider myself pretty lucky.

[micki76]

Oh, man. I think we must be sharing in-laws. I have some interesting in laws. Actually I love my FIL, it's mostly the rest of them that grate on my last nerve. My SIL's are ok.

My MIL is a manipulative... witch. She thinks the world revolves around her and that we should all bow down to her. She's very immature, and good at putting an enormous guilt trip on her son. I am just about fed up with her. Hubby and I have had many talks about her & her manipulating everyone. I think if anything could tear apart our marriage, it's her.

She "wants" me at her house at Xmas. Why? So that she has control over everyone. (She doesn't actually like me) She told me this Xmas that she wanted me there. I told her I was spending Xmas day with my family, but that we would spend Xmas eve AND the evening before Xmas eve with Michael's family. She actually told me that my family (young niece & nephew) would just have to do without me, that she wanted me there! I very nearly hung up on her.

Unfortunately for me they live about 3 miles from me. I want to move so badly.

I've put up with 9 years of this so far.

[Samantha Puppy]

Damn, micki76... I don't know if I could deal with that. Luckily, I vented to my husband about his mother's bossiness this weekend and he said "After 26 years you learn how to tune it out" so at least he's not defending her.

For holidays this year, we spend morning/early afternoon Thanksgiving with my family and late afternoon/night with his. For Christmas, we went to church with my husband's family and then went over his uncle's afterwards until about midnight. The next day, we opened presents together at our house and went down my parents around 10:30am to open gifts with them and have dinner with them. Around 6:30pm, we left to go over my husband's parents house for presents, drinks and dessert. His mom kept complaining how much she hated not having him around when they opened presents and that next year, she wants us there... which means we'd spend Christmas Eve AND Christmas Day with them.

I. don't. think. so.

(By the way, his parents live 10 minutes away, mine live 20.)

[catnapper]

Hmmmm... this is terrible to say, but my in-laws think I walk on water (I'm sooo perfect!) but I HATE HATE HATE to spend any time with them. StepMIL is a big blow hard, phony fake and FIL loves to talk about the past (I guess a retired history teacher never retires) and goes off on tangents about things that happened in 1952. When he's 100% in the present, he's terrible because he's a know-it-all. No matter the subject, he knows all about it. At Christmas we got into a family debate about a show on the History channel. Everyone but him saw the show yet he had to kow more about that documentary than anyone else.

As for hubby and my mom? He adores my mom, and my mom loves him right back. At first they were wary of wach other - she especially didn't like him. Once she realized that under his gruff (grumpy) exterior he was a big pussycat she saw what I see in him - a big teddy bear with a heart of gold.

[NoahsMommy]

My in-laws are nice people, but I'd make sure I was always polite, regardless.

We are WAY different in almost every way and I'll be honest and say I can take them in small doses. There's just something annoying about someone living in their own tiny closed-minded world that gets boring.

But, like I said. I always am polite am always respectful of them.

[kt_luvs_kitties]

To all that have lost this MIL-FIL I am sorry I dont know how that would feel...I hope I dont have to any time soon.

To all that dont have the best relationships with IN-Laws, I am also sorry, it is so hard to deal with sometimes, isnt it?

My MIL and my Step FIL were who I was referring to earlier.

My husbands real father and his wife, we get along great. We are respectful and I believe love each other alot. I adore them, because when they call for my husband, they make it a point to talk to me. When they do something for him, it gets done for me too. They make me feel as though I AM a part of their FAMILY. It feels nice to be included.

His real mother and her husband, I NEVER EVER have felt that way. Me and my husband have dated for almost 8 years now. *Imagine, I am only 21, hubby is 22* and we got married when I was 19 and he was 20. So we were young, BUT we did date longer than many older people have. I feel justified in saying that we love each other, completely faithful to each other, and we respect each other to no end... WHY must they not want to see it that way. I am always nice, and I try to just keep my mouth shut at disagreements, I have told my husband 40952874906 times that I do not like to feel left out. He tells them that I am his wife, and I should be respected. They agree but then it just never seems like they really care.
I think it is due to the fact that, he is his mommas baby, not mine. BUT then again, she threw him out at the age of 14, and sent him to live 9 hours away.. to his fathers house *thats how me met*. NOW do you see what I mean by the contridictory attitude?
ok, enough of my bitching... Anyone else want to get in on this conversation? lol

[Sara luvs her Tinky]

I really like my inlaws... i feel really blessed to have them.

My MIL is a very good spiritual mentor... she always helps me pray and helps me get through my problems...

my FIL... is a very "to himself" type person... he never bothers us ... but is always there when we need him..

My BIL is really funny and a lot of fun to hang out with ... you would never guess he is as old as he is because he acts so goofy.. and his wife is really nice too...

ERIC looooooooves my family!!!!!!! No i'm just kidding... I'm sure he does love them .. but he is not as close to them as I am to his family.

[ramanth]

I voted 'other' because Andy's parents are my future inlaws and so far we do okay together. (no fights)

However,

My parents and Andy's parents are like night and day. My parents are goofy and just well.... fun! *laughs*

Andy's parents are very nice people, but they seem more conservative. They are nice to me and I to them, but I always feel like I have to put on an act when I'm around them. Like I can't be myself. :\

I fear one of these days the real me will break out in front of them and they'll forbid Andy to marry me.

But in the meantime, Andy's mom and I email each other and Andy says she's happy to finally have a daughter.

[RICHARD]

I get along better with my Out-laws...

[kt_luvs_kitties]

lol @ Richard... I bet you do

[micki76]

Originally posted by ramanth
Andy's parents are very nice people, but they seem more conservative. They are nice to me and I to them, but I always feel like I have to put on an act when I'm around them. Like I can't be myself. :\

I fear one of these days the real me will break out in front of them and they'll forbid Andy to marry me.

I used to feel that way, but I've finally let the real me out. They don't like her. I'm not a prejudiced jew/black/gay/mexican/muslim/etc. hater. They think I'm some liberal nut.

I take that as a compliment.

At least wait until you're married to spring the real Kimmy on them!

[Glacier]

I get along alright with my father-in-law. It's not a very warm relationship. I don't think he particularly likes me, but it's not a mean thing. We just don't click. We are polite. We both love his son so we deal with each other as nicely as we can. He recently moved up here to be closer to his boy, which annoys me to no end, but it's kinda handy. When it was -45C, I called him and asked him to stoke our wood stove and let my dogs in the house. He's nice to the animals and always willing to help us out. He never bugs us about human grandchildren either, which I appreciate!

Hubby's parents are divorced. My mother-in-law doesn't know I exsist. My husband hasn't spoken to her in over 15 years. From what I've heard, that's a good thing and hopefully will stay that way!

My parents like my husband and they get along very well. Initially they didn't like him much. They were never mean to him, but they really, really, liked the boyfriend before him! Hubs has since proved himself to them and now they accept him as part of the family. We don't see them very often as they live 3000 miles away, maybe that helps!! Course we have the most stable, functional marriage of all my siblings, so my husband looks like a real prize to them!