Our PT joke thread

[Furpup67]

What do you call a cow with no legs?
Ground beef!

[cassiesmom]

What happens if you see a robbery at an Apple store? You are an iWitness!

[Kay Burton]

What happens if you see a robbery at an Apple store? You are an iWitness!

Most likely it will. To be honest, I still don't get Apple's joke. Wild overpricing, there are devices not worse, but much cheaper.

[cassiesmom]

Where does a stallion go when he needs to see the doctor? To the HORSEpital

[cassiesmom]

ONe of my co-workers writes a "dad joke" on her white board almost every day. Here's a recent one ...

How do you tell a good joke about pizza? It's all in the delivery. *groan*

[phesina]

Good ones, Elyse.. Thank you!

[cassiesmom]

ONe of my co-workers writes a "dad joke" on her white board almost every day. Here's a recent one ...

Here's another recent one: What did the baby corn say to the mama corn? "Where is pop corn?" *groan*

[Cat Daddy]

A man walks out to the street and catches a taxi just going by. He gets into the taxi, and the cabbie says, “Perfect timing. You’re just like Frank.”

Passenger: “Who?”

Cabbie: “Frank Feldman. He’s a guy who did everything right all the time. Like my coming along when you needed a cab, things happened like that to Frank Feldman every single time.”

Passenger: “There are always a few clouds over everybody.”

Cabbie: “Not Frank Feldman. He was a terrific athlete. He could have won the Grand-Slam at tennis. He could golf with the pros. He sang like an opera baritone and danced like a Broadway star and you should have heard him play the piano. He was an amazing guy.”

Passenger: “Sounds like he was really something special.”

Cabbie: “There’s more. He had a memory like a computer. He remembered everybody’s birthday. He knew all about wine, which foods to order and which fork to eat them with. He could fix anything. Not like me. I change a fuse, and the whole street blacks out. But Frank Feldman could do everything right.”

Passenger: “Wow, what a guy!”

Cabbie: “He always knew the quickest way to go in traffic and avoid traffic jams. Not like me, I always seem to get stuck in them. But Frank, he never made a mistake, and he really knew how to treat a woman and make her feel good. He would never answer her back even if she was in the wrong; and his clothing was always immaculate, shoes highly polished too. He was the perfect man! He never made a mistake. No one could ever measure up to Frank Feldman.”

Passenger: “How did you meet him?”

Cabbie: “I never actually met Frank. He died and I married his wife.”

[Kay Burton]

Here's another recent one: What did the baby corn say to the mama corn? "Where is pop corn?" *groan*

It's funny. I haven't heard this joke before. I need to remember.

[cassiesmom]

ONe of my co-workers writes a "dad joke" on her white board almost every day.

Here's another recent one. She's sharing Halloween jokes...

Q: What's the most important subject for a witch to learn in school?
A: Spelling.

[phesina]

Hee hee! Oh, that's funny... and quite clever, too!

Thanks, Elyse, to your co-worker for the joke and to you for sharing it with us!

Boo!

[cassiesmom]

From my co-worker's "dad joke" file... Do you know a scarecrow's favorite fruit? Strawberries.

[Maya & Inka's mommy]

I know a goodie, so I will try to translate it.....

A woman buys a new wardrobe for the bedroom.
She wants to surprise her husband, so she decides to assemble it all by herself
But, every time the tram passes her house, the wardrobe falls apart.... .
She keeps trying several times. All in tears, she rings the shop where she bought it.
The shopkeeper feels so sorry for her and promises to come to her house in the afternoon.

The man assembles the wardrobe, but again it falls apart the moment the tram passes.
He says:"Ok, there mùst be something wrong, but I have nò idea what it might be.
I suggest I get inside this thing, and when the tram passes, I hope to see what happens!"

So the man does this, and closes the door.
But then her husband gets home... .
He wants to take a shower and takes an ironed shirt in the old wardrobe.
Right this moment a tram passes, and the wardrobe falls apart again...!
The man who was in it says "This is NOT what you think sir, I was only waiting for the next tram!!!"

[phesina]

Oh, that's funny! Thanks, Lut!

[cassiesmom]

From my co-worker who writes "dad jokes" on her white board...
Where do snowmen put their money? In snowbanks