dealing with death

[4 feline house]

Thanks, Angels3 and Karen, for your words of encouragement.

Actually, the problem may be solved now. I started a new job Feb. 5th after having been laid off from my old job, and yesterday I went to the new employee orientation to learn about the benefits. Turns out, I am eligible to receive up to four times my salary in life insurance before having to submit evidence of insurability, which would be enough to get my kid through his next few years, and have my cats taken care of through the Dallas SPCA surviving pets program. By coincidence, yesterday I also got a mailing from the SPCA, so I'm signing them up!

[Angels3]

4 feline house, that is the most wonderful news about your new job & how it means you can provide for your cats in the long term. Isn't it great the way a difficult problem so quickly turned into something positive. You did say that you were going to pray about it. And those prayers have been answered. Best wishes in your new job.

[Logan]

4 Feline House...
I've been thinking about you and praying for you too. Its hard to face all you've had to, and I admire your stamina and the fact that you are living life to its fullest.
The rest of us probably wish for your wisdom and good attitude.
I think Karen is right. Our animals do help us to live healthier, happier lives. Yours is surely enriched by those four wonderful kitties.
Your son is lucky to have such a great, caring mom.
I'm so happy for you and your new job, plus the added insurance benefits that can give you some piece of mind.
Keep your chin up! And a long, healthy life to you and your family (including the 4 cats, of course).
Logan

[tatsxxx11]

Just started reading this post today and it is certainly is a tough one to get through. I just want to say that 4 Feline House, I'm thinking of you, and so happy for you, hearing of the great news about your job. What a wonderful, caring, thoughtful furmom you are to plan ahead so lovingly for your babies! But, as a nurse, I have to say, I don't like hearing you talk about how much time you have left!!!!!!! We all, in life, have no guarantees, but neither is any prognosis written in stone. With your wonderful loving spirit, and the incredible healing love of your furkids, AND modern medicine, anything is possible. Think DECADES!! As for "animal love." I read a post recently on this forum where the member stated, "I'm not one of those who loves their pets more than their children." I have several friends who think like this. That such love for an animal is wierd. They say things like "You can't compare it to the love for a child." Well, I do not have human children, so perhaps my perspecitve is different from those who do. She's right. I cannot compare it. But I do not believe that complete and total love and devotion for a beloved family pet and total unconditional love for a child, are NOT mutually exclusive. They are different, perhaps, but still very real. My furchildren, along with my husband, ARE my family, and I do not apologize to anyone for that. Like so many of you have posted, so often with the loss of a pet, people, even friends, cannot understand the depth of my grief. The usual platitudes, niceities, then, "get over it". I know how deep and real the love I feel for my kids who have passed is. Years later, sometimes when I am alone, or at night, I think of them and cry; a lot. I think of them all...every day, and still miss them. To my thinking, to deny that this type of deep love for animals is not valid, is to take a very narrow view of the human experience. We all come to this life with our own individual life experiences. I have known many senior citizens and persons suffering from illnesses for whom the love given to, and received from, a furkid, made the difference between dying, merely surviving and thriving.!! This forum is so great because it's members respect one another other in our need to love and be loved in our own unique ways! I know this is the place I will turn to for comfort and support should one of my kids' pass. And all the sad stories of the loss of the poor little guinea pigs!! Squeekie is my latest addition (a piggie) and now I'm already anticipating losing him! Loving is hard.

[Daisy's Mom]

This doesn't have to do with pets but I just had to post... I live in a small town and go to a school where everyone pretty much knows everyone else... this morning at 1 AM, one of the nicest kids you could ever meet slipped on black ice and hit a tree and died. He was only 18 and he was so nice. I just want to ask for your thoughts and prayers for him tonight. His family was very close, to make it worse. Everyone is very shook up and upset. Thank you for understanding, you guys are the best.

[Angels3]

Daisy's Mom, I am so sorry about the tragic loss of such a lovely young person. Our thoughts & prayers go out to you, his family, & friends in your town. It is hard to accept that a young man of only 18 years should be taken. Here's a lovely poem that was read out at the funeral of a young man which we went to recently.

'I'll lend you for a little while a friend of mine, God said,
For you to love the while he lives, & mourn for when he's dead.
He'll bring his charms to gladden you, & though his stay be brief,
You'll always have his memories as a solace
to your grief.'

[tatsxxx11]

My heart goes out to you Daisy' Mom. How tragic that such a fine young person so needlessly lost his life. I will keep you, him and his family in my heart and prayers today. I truly am so sorry. Life is so fragile and fleeting. A reminder to us all to hold tight to those we love.

[Sudilar]

Daisy'sMom, life is so unfair!! my thoughts and prayers are with you and his family at this time. How sad.
Sue

[jackiesdaisy1935]

It is so sad when we lose one of our young people whose life is just beginning. Our love and prayers go out to you and his family.

[ownerof3dogs]

Did he slip and fall or did he slip on ice in a car?
no matter is is really sad

[Daisy's Mom]

I'm sorry if I wasn't clear, I was crying when I typed that! He slipped on ice driving on the way home from his girlfriend's house. He was going fast so that he could make his curfew. Thank you for your kind words, thoughts, and prayers, everyone, and Angels3, your poem was beautiful. He was just such a nice kid... I know that's what everyone says when something like this happens but it's true. He was one of those all-around great people: friends with simply everybody, a member of National Honor Society, captain of the Varsity basketball team, he played varsity tennis and soccer, and was ranked 7th academically in the class. It's heartwrenching. This is a very hard time for everyone here. It's good to come here and take my mind off everything by blabbing about Daisy Thanks for being there for me.

[Karen]

Lesson for every parent of a teen, and especially and teen or new drivers: your life is more important than any curfew. Ice forms on roads that you cannot see, especially at night. Even rain can make going "a little fast" fatal. If you think you might be late, stop and call, then drive home as slowly as it takes to be safe.
Off my soapbox now. Daisy's Mom, just hug Daisy, look in those droopy brown eyes, and know that though it is a dreadful way to learn, maybe people will drive a little more carefully, at least for a while. Hug your pup, even if she thinks you're being all wierd with you face leaking and all that - she will love you anyway, and probably do something so goofy you laugh despite it all! (Go, Daisy!)

[RachelJ]

Daisy's Mom, You never cease to amaze me with what a compassionate, caring and sensitive person you are. I'm so sorry that you have to experience these kinds of sad events at such a young age. I wish we could put our arms around you and give you a hug. I shall include extra prayer for this young man's family and friends and you tonight.

[Daisy's Mom]

Thanks for being there everyone! Went to my first wake ever tonight... it was so tough. He and his younger brother Glenn were best friends, and I am very close with Glenn. One look at his face and I lost it and sobbed uncontrollably for an hour straight... and the casket was so small, it's just not fair. At least Dan was so loved: we got to the the place early and still waited in a 2 hour line. When we left, the line had extended out of the house, through the garage, and down the road. School was awful, they held classes but said those of us who knew Dan could go to the auditorium and be there for each other. Half of the school sat in there, crying and hugging. I have never been through anything so awful. Sorry to be talking about it so much, especially since it has nothing to do with pets, but I just have to share it as a lesson to everyone. Yes, we are definitely learning the hard way. The funeral is tomorrow morning. I get the day off from school but I don't even care. Usually that would thrill me. It's just not the same now. Well, I should go to bed now... RIP Dan, we love you Thanks again to all of you who care so much. I love you guys!
-Bridget

[4 feline house]

Daisy's mom-

I haven't logged on for a few days, so my symathies are being extended belatedly.

When something this dreadful happens to one of our Pet of the Day friends, we don't care that it's off subject.

I know you are hurting now, and nothing me or anyone else can say to you will make that go away.

I know you are not old enough to have kids, but as a mother of a teenage boy, I can tell you, that hearing this type of thing just knocks the wind out of you, even if you never knew the child who died. Death is never easy, but the loss of such a promising youth, with his whole life still ahead of him, is a cruelty none of us will never understand. Everyone keeps saying "if only". If only he had slowed down, if only he had watched the time closer, if only he had taken another road. If only he hadn't died. But it's so final, that's the cruelest thing about our friends, families, and pets dying.

My thoughts and prayers are with you, and I wish I could be there to hug you, too.