I believe Keegan is feeling your grief and you are feeling his, What I have done with this sitchy is, set aside only a limited amount of time per day to to allow yourself to grieve and then lesson it gradually. The time in between is to be used for living as joyously as possible because life is such a gift and we need to embrace it as much as we can. For instance, 1 hr. ( too long 20 mins.) totally give yourself to the grief you feel and then try to breathe and live. It can be the same time every day, or the same place, or both. You will be honoring your beloved angel and honoring yourself as well. Your cat will never leave your heart and would want you to have the very best life This is only a suggestion I would never mean to offend you, Gonna pray for you for 10 minutes now cuz yer worth it and so is Keegan. I'm not religouse, don't even know how to spell it obviously , but love is all that matters and prayers are always answered I believe