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Thread: Words hurt.

  1. #1
    Join Date
    May 2005
    Location
    Oklahoma
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    1,452

    Words hurt.

    Last year at this time a girl I know weighed 220 pounds. I don't remember what I weighed then but she was bigger than me. I have never been anything but nice to her and was proud of her when she started losing weight. Now 1 year later she weighs 150 pounds. I've also lost weight but not as much and she now weighs less than me. I'm in a size 14 and she's a size 10. I've went through a lot of self esteem issues and have just finally learned to love myself no matter what size I am (even though I'm still trying to lose weight) However she now thinks she's better than everyone else and has started calling me a fat a**. I've never called her such things when she was bigger than me. I've never even thought them. And it just floors me that someone can be so cruel. I've tried not to let her words get to me, but no matter what I tell myself, words hurt. Why do people like to hurt others with their words so much?

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Jun 2000
    Location
    Windham, Vermont, USA
    Posts
    40,839
    Sweetie, talk to her. Tell her her words hurt you, and not to be so cruel. She obviously has her own self esteem issues if she needs to make herself feel better by belittling you, but don't let it get to you. You are losing weight in your own time, at your own pace, and that is what matters more than somebody else, okay?
    I've Been Frosted

  3. #3
    Those who resort to name calling don't like themselves and they often direct that feeling towards someone else. It gives them an instant lift but it doesn't last so they usually repeat it; it's rather like a sugar rush. The blood sugar skyrockets, then plummets, so more sugar is needed. They're to be pitied and I wouldn't be hurt by her words if I were you. She remembers all too well that she weighed more than you at one time and she's fearful of going back to that old weight. Fear causes all sorts of behavior. Blow it off and be strong in who you are. Words can harm and they can also heal. "Death and life are in the power of the tongue". ~ Prov. 18:21
    Blessings,
    Mary



    "Time and unforeseen occurrence befall us all." Ecclesiastes 9:11

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Jan 2004
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    SE USA
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    18,443
    Ha! I tell her "How FAST you forget!"...

    Special Needs Pets just leave bigger imprints on your heart!

  5. #5
    Join Date
    May 2002
    Location
    Ploss's Halfway House for Homeless Cats
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    I feel your pain, girl. I was bullied when I was young. My Mom always taught me to be careful what I say because words can never taken back.

    I hope you try and talk to her and tell her how much her words have hurt. Hopefully she will understand. If not, then I'd just avoid her. She's not worth your friendship.

    Congratulatons on your weight loss!!! I'm proud of you.

    Rest In Peace Casey (Bubba Dude) Your paw print will remain on my heart forever. 12/02
    Mollie Rose, you were there for me through good times and in bad, from the beginning.Your passing will leave a hole in my heart.We will be together "One Fine Day". 1994-2009
    MooShoo,you left me too soon.I wasn't ready.Know that you were my soulmate and have left me broken hearted.I loved you like no other. 1999 - 2010See you again "ONE FINE DAY"
    Maya Linn, my heart is broken. The day your beautiful blue eyes went blind was the worst day of my life.I only wish I could've done something.I'll miss your "premium" purr and our little "conversations". 1997-2013 See you again "ONE FINE DAY"

    DO NOT BUY WHILE SHELTER ANIMALS DIE!!

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Aug 2004
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    Alberta, Canada
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    22,005
    Congrats, girl!

    In my heavy days, I would tell people I would rather have the fat on my hips than in my head! Maybe there is one place she HASN'T lost it.

    Medusa has a point - she is afraid of gaining back. Would be great if you two could team up...IF that is what is wanted.

    HUGS!
    "Do or do not. There is no try." -- Yoda

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Aug 2009
    Location
    Northern cyberspace
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    1,967
    If you still vakue her friendship then be straight with her and let her know how hurtful it is when she says this. Ask her if she remembers you calling her such things when the shoe was on the other foot and she weighed more than you? If she snuffs it off or laughs, then she wasn't truly your friend, she was using you . You don't need her in your life if that's the case.

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