My buddy (co-pilot) Steve

**lbaker** · 02-25-2006, 04:10 PM

This is so hard. He is hanging in there but had to have another operation this morning to finish (thank doG FINISH) closing up his torso after making sure the last op stopped inner bleeding and organs, what's left of them, will start to heal. They also had to wire his jaw shut. We didn't even know it had been broken. No word yet about an e-card system but I am reading to him and will relay your thoughts and prayers. Still not truly consious but that is most likely a good thing. The man got hit by a train for doG's sake, it's a wonder he is still alive, and for that we are eternally grateful.
L

**Karen** · 02-25-2006, 04:14 PM

Thank you for relaying all our wishes to him, even if he's not exactly conscious, I am sure they are connecting with him on some level. I am still glad his brain and spine weren't damaged, and hope everything esle is on the road to recovery.

**Daisy and Delilah** · 02-25-2006, 04:28 PM

OMG. This is just so hard for this poor fellow and all of his friends and loved ones. My thoughts and prayers will continue to go out to all of you during this most difficult time

**Vela** · 02-25-2006, 04:29 PM

I'm glad he is hanging in there. I pray for him daily that he will recover fully. Our best thoughts and wishes for everyone involved and we will continue to keep him in our prayers.

**Tubby & Peanut's Mom** · 02-25-2006, 09:27 PM

I'm glad he's hanging in there, Laurie. Hope you are too.

Again from my experience with my parents' accident, sometimes I think it's worse for us "onlookers" than it is for them. Especially those most injured, like Steve, and my dad. For their own sake, the hospital will often put them into a "medical coma." This ensures that they will stay still, and I'm sure Steve has a respirator which is very uncomfortable if you're conscious. As a matter of fact, as soon as they let my dad "come up" he ripped the respirator out himself so they had to tie his hands to the bed.

He had no idea what had happened, he had no idea where he was, he had no idea he couldn't just get out of bed and he had no idea just how injured he was. The same is probably true with Steve, so it's best that he stay "under" to let his body heal as much as possible. This is extremely hard on us "onlookers" but it really is the best thing. I know he hears you and you just being there is making a huge difference to his well being and to his healing process. However, don't be surprised if he doesn't remember any of this once he's better. My dad was in the hospital for a month and doesn't remember a minute of it! He was even transferred to a different hospital by plane. He remembers being on a plane, but that's it - not a second of the hospital stay!

Anyway, didn't mean to go on, but just wanted to try and give you some assurance. I say if Steve has made it this long, there is a way better chance he will make a full recovery.......as fully as his injuries will allow anyway.

{{{hugs}}} to you - hang in there and tell Steve we're thinking of him and praying for his recovery.

**lbaker** · 02-28-2006, 06:35 PM

OK, just a week now and the innards seem to be healing but still no true brain/cognizance response. Eye lids start to open but no "tracking", that's the eyeball thing. Went into the "innards" with a scope camera thingy today for his bronchial and lung action and, well, OK. But his Mom is freaking about his brain activity, or lack thereof. The nurses want ME to talk to her to calm her down. EXCUSE ME, I'M NOT A MEDICAL PERSON What if I say the wrong thing and give false hope? Medical induced coma, yeah... I understand. But she wants him to look at her. Oh Lord how do I help? If it were my son I would want nothing less. I'm so sorry guys, I'm just worn out

I just logged off but had to come back on to say I'm sorry.. I sound like a whiney spoiled brat. I can do what is needed now. Thanks for letting me sound off.
L

**slick** · 02-28-2006, 07:06 PM

Laurie my friend. Please forgive me for being so inconsiderate as to not keep up with this thread. I have just finished reading the whole thing again and I must say that what Debbie wrote made me feel a bit better about this tradegy.

God bless you for being there and I can only imagine how hard this must be on you and the whole family. As for speaking to Steve's Mom I guess they want you to address the issue because you are closest to the family and always there. My first reaction when I read that was "No, you are too close to home to speak to her." In other words, you are just as distraught as the rest of the family. Then I thought again.....you have a way about you....your words can be of great comfort (I've been on the receiving end.. )....try to soothe her with the thought that these things take time. I don't think they expect you to give medical advice.....just encouragement and support, and my friend, you do that so well.

Sending big {{{hugs}}} and more prayers are on the way. You know where I am if you need me.
slick xoxoxoxo

**Karen** · 02-28-2006, 08:01 PM

Steve and you are still in our prayers.

**Tubby & Peanut's Mom** · 02-28-2006, 08:33 PM

Laurie, you are NOT a whiney spoiled brat! You are a great friend who is having a tough time dealing with your friend's tragic accident and you are doing the best you can. I can only imagine that you are exhausted from having to deal with all of this, plus have to go to work every day and deal with daily life. Try to get some rest and I know you'll have a better outlook in the morning, and more than likely you'll have good idea of what to tell his mom. Like Slick says, I don't think they're looking to you to give out medical advice, if anything they're looking to you to interpret their medical terms into more "lay" terms that his mother can understand easier.

I know you are being strong and hanging in there, but this needs to be said also. It's ok for you to break down and cry - and it's ok to do it in front of his family if that's when it happens. It's really quite cleansing and clears your head and actually makes you feel stronger. I remember my "break down" with my parents accident, and I remember afterwards, feeling quite calm and clear headed and much more optimistic. It was like a big fog had been lifted from over my head.

So be strong, hang in there, but don't be afraid to break either.

{{{hugs}}}

**Ginger's Mom** · 02-28-2006, 09:02 PM

I, too, have not been keeping up with this as I should.

I am so sorry. I am sorry that you have to go through this Laurie. You do not at all sound like a whiney spoiled brat, you sound like a wonderful friend who has way too much to deal with. Big hugs to you, and more prayers going out.

**lbaker** · 03-05-2006, 02:05 PM

Hey hey! Just came back from the hopspittal and I am encouraged, somewhat. His eyes didn't open today but he does look better. Good color. I held his hand and "sang" *such as it is*

one of our favorite tunes.. "Your Sweet and Shiny Eyes, Are Like the Stars Above Larado".. etc. And I sang "Hush Little Baby Don't Say a Word, Momma's Gonna Buy You a Mocking Bird"... When I did, and he heard my voice, I swear he moved his broken arm and reached to me. He held onto my hand very tightly. He even rubbed his thumb against my fingers. Maybe he was asking me to not quit my day job and don't even try to sing any more

That's a VERY GOOD THING. I was able to speak with his Doc's and when I called his mom & dad after getting home they were soooo pleased.

**Laura's Babies** · 03-05-2006, 05:00 PM

OH GOD!! I just saw this thread! I think you know what I have been through last year with my son Eddie.

Eddies wife brought his CD player in his room and played his favorite CD's while he was in his coma and as he was waking up. I think it helps for them to hear things, sounds, music they are use to and probably comforting. Keep talking to him and when you run out of things to say, read to him, a book a magizine, anything that he may be interested in.

Read this to him from me, Laura Sibley that lives in Louisiana

Hi Steve, did you know you have a ton of people praying for you all over the world and sending good thoughts and vibes at you to help you heal and get well? I am one of those people. My son was hurt real bad last year in an explosion and he survived when most wouldn't have and you can too and you will. Hang in there, feel our love and strength and draw from that if you need it. God will place his healing hand on you and make you well but you have to do your part too, as my son did. Hang on and hang in there, feel the love and prayers and let them and the doctors do their work while you rest and heal. Take it easy there, get your rest since your body needs all it's strength to heal and recover. We will continue to pray for you and send you good thoughts and vibes until you no longet need them. God Bless you Steve and He will take care of you. Laura

**Daisy and Delilah** · 03-05-2006, 10:40 PM

My thoughts and prayers are still going out to Steve and all the rest of you. I can't imagine how hard it is to go through this. I can't wait to hear that he's made a complete recovery. (((((HUGS)))))

**Karen** · 03-05-2006, 11:00 PM

Hey Laurie, tell Steve he'd better get around to opening his eyes soon, or we'll all be sending tapes for you to play him - or for the nurses to play when you're not there. Mario singing Day-O ... Lady howling along ...

I know some really, really really annoying songs I could teach you, Laurie - the kind that'd wake someone out of a coma just to tell you to STOP ALREADY!

Seriously, he's still in our prayers, as are you.

**gini** · 03-06-2006, 10:32 AM

Laurie, it must be so difficult for you to see your long time friend in this condition - but your recent news sounds so hopeful.

Debbie's comments really helped too and hopefully Steve won't remember any of this time (especially your singing to him