Problem at school. . . please help.

[catnapper]

Ok, as a mom, I hate when friends try to push kids into something they either don't want to do or know they shouldn't do.

Do you like him? Yes? Then date him. Your friends will just have to "get over it"

How would you feel if he dumped you just because his friends told him to?

Now, I am a little confused... and forgive me if it sounds a bit sarcastic... but how exactly can you be popular in a class of 13 kids? There's 13 of you for pity's sake. You & your twin sister make up about 17% of the class. That leaves 11 others to end up hating you over your boyfriend? Sounds pretty pathetic on their part. Its 11 people not worth being friends with.

I don't suppose it would be hard to be the football hero in a school that size. What, does every boy who tries out for the team make it? Is every girl on the cheerleading squad? Get where I'm going here? Its kinda hard to have "popular" and "heroes" in a group as small as your school. If they are going to try to make you feel left out because you're dating this guy who's an "outsider" then ignore them. If you break up with him then you'll feel bad because in your heart you know you like him. Then what if any of these friends started dating him next month? Believe me, it could happen... and would. I saw it happen with my own daughter.

As a mom, my own daughter is dating a guy that got in trouble for fighting. I kknow the kid just was in the wrong place at the wrong time... but still, watch for little anger management signs. Even just getting worked up about your ex concerns me.

[Craftlady]

Originally posted by catnapper
Now, I am a little confused... and forgive me if it sounds a bit sarcastic... but how exactly can you be popular in a class of 13 kids? There's 13 of you for pity's sake. You & your twin sister make up about 17% of the class. That leaves 11 others to end up hating you over your boyfriend? Sounds pretty pathetic on their part. Its 11 people not worth being friends with.

Your not confused Catnapper. These students will change their opinons, boyfriends, girlfriends, friends like their underware... daily, weekly, monthly. This was the simplist analysis to make my point. Maturity levels are going show themselves 1000x greater. Since it's such a small student body in each class of the school their problems etc are magified 1000x greater in their effects. It's not going to be hard to be a sports hero, cheerleader, homecoming queen in a school system that small.

I thought our local independent school which averages of 35-40 students graduating was small but 17 average thats way to small.

[Maya & Inka's mommy]

Originally posted by luvofallhorses
This might not be much help...but I'll give it a shot..

Go to the mall or something with your best friend and go to some place to eat or something where the two of you can be alone and ask her WHY she doesn't like Tyler. If your best friend is truly your best friend..she wouldn't let a guy come between you two. JMHO. Good luck and please keep us updated.

Love,

Krista & the fuzz butts

I think this is the best advize for you here! I wouldn't drop Tyler just because my friends dislike him for whatever reason. I would defenitely insist on knowing why!!
Hey, if you really love Tyler, give him a chance, and follow your heart.
It is difficult to judge him just by this picture, but he looks like a great guy to me

GOOD LUCK!!!!

[mina'smomma]

Originally posted by Samantha Puppy
People your age are more fickle than not. Did you see how quickly they turned their back on you? It'll reverse just as quickly. If not, they were never really much of a friend to begin with - don't you think?

I totally agree with Jamie. It's not easy, but if you like Tyler then there is no reason for you to break up with him. Your friends will come around in time and if they don't well then you don't need those type of friends. Kudos to you for moving on because it sounds like you ex hasn't.

[Cataholic]

Ah, high school. Wouldn't go back for all the tea in China.

One thing you might consider- stop the drama yourself. If they don't talk to you? So what. You are in school to learn anyhow. Won't eat with you? So what. Eat, read a book, talk to your sister, etc.

Stop letting the "she said he said they said" stuff get to you. Just ignore it. Someone doesn't like Tyler? Fine. It isn't your job to make them like him. It isn't his job to have everyone like him. Continue to be sweet and cheerful, and let the rest of the stuff go on over you. THAT speaks a message way more than trying to get other people to like him.

One thing....I am NOT saying that just because everyone does something, you should do it, too...but, I do wonder about a small, close knit group of classmates such as yours ALL taking a dislike to Tyler. ***Maybe** there was/is an issue? If you are the only one "understanding" Tyler...well, I might wonder about that. I can't say I have ever come into a new school, work environment, college, class, neighborhood, and had the majority of the people NOT like me....course, I am pretty loveable! (joke)

[JenBKR]

Originally posted by Flatcoatluver
hmm maybe she might be a little jelous, you might be spending to much time with him? i dunno

That was my first thought.

I met my husband (Shawn) at the very end of junior year in high school. I had just broken up with a guy (for cheating on me BTW) but some of my friends did not like Shawn. They barely knew him, but were mad at me and would not talk to me for a while. They kept trying to get me back with my ex (who cheated!). I asked after a while why they wanted me with the other guy instead of Shawn, and they said because my ex was a member of our group of friends, and we did stuff together, but when I was with Shawn I wasn't with them as much. We did finally work it all out.

BTW, i have been out of high school for 8 years, and have not talked to any of those 'friends' since, because we all went our separate ways to college or whatever. I do still have friends from high school, those who respected my choices. They certainly make the best friends!

[Toby's my baby]

Thanks everyone. I will update you on my best friend in a day or two, i never got the right time to talk to her today. I am tearing up (seriously) hearing all of your replies, they mean so much to me, and it means a lot to me that all of you care so much about one person that you dont hardly know, and you have never met. Thank you all so much, I love you all!

[bluekat]

Like the others already said, these "friends" don't really seem like true friends. They really should get to actually know Tyler before judging him..I mean, if he hasn't done anything bad to them then why do they hate him. And they shouldn't judge you on who you're going out with.

Just don't let it get to you. Its just one more year, and you'll be in a bigger school next year with many new friends. But for now, at least you still have your sister & Tyler.

From what you've told me before about Tyler, he seems like a really nice bf. So for now, who cares what anyone else thinks.

& btw, you can always talk to me on msn or pm me if you wanna talk about anything