Getting frustrated - time to rehome Strauss?

[catland]

Here's a quick summary.

We have Sidney, who is nine, a reluctant sort of alpha-male. He's a lousy fighter but thinks its his job to defend the home.

Jan is six. She is a terror - in a good way I guess. She'll run any cat out of the yard purely on her ability to yell and scream.

Joxer is five. He's mister "don't worry, be happy." cat. He gets along with everyone because he challenges no-one.

Enter Strauss, who came to us last January when his human passed away. (on a side note, Strauss and Joxer are brothers and Jan is his mom, but he was gone for so long that we know there's no lasting relationship there).

Here's the problem. After all this time, Strauss and Sidney are still battling it out. Strauss is a far superior fighter which means that Sid comes out on the losing end every time. Strauss is usually the instigator but Sid also won't back down and say "ok, you win". Also, Strauss gets along fine with Joxer and he steers clear of Jan, so there's no fighting there.

We feed them in separate places and have put a bell on Strauss so that Sidney at least gets warning that Strauss is around.

Before you ask, Jan is spayed and all the boys were neutered when they were young, so its not hormones talking.

We're going to try to do what we can but we're now talking about re-homing Strauss if we can't get this resolved.

Thanks for listening.

[Logan]

I wish, so badly, that I had some advice, but I don't.

Mimi was an "only cat" for so long and absolutely hates it if there is another one here. She has learned to live with Butter, who has been with us for over 4 years now, but still hisses at him and avoids him at every step. At her advanced age, she is more accepting, and thank goodness, he is behaving better (he was quite aggressive with her a few times which scared me to death). I think with younger ones, you do have to make the choice to rehome sometime.

My prayers will be with you as you deal with this situation. I wouldn't dare to introduce another one here at this time, although I am tempted, constantly.

Logan

[Laura's Babies]

Can you give him "time out's" in a shut room when he does that? Samantha was bad about attacking all mine when I finally got her and she wouldn't stop. I was at my wits end when I tried that and it only took her THREE days to figure out she did NOT like being shut in a room all alone and that bad behavior is what got her there. I think she is just so smart to figure all that out and realize she had to stop it or be shut up alone. They are still not the best of friends but she does not attack anybody anymore and that was last winter I think. Key here is you have to be consistant and do it EVERY time.... They HATE being shut in a room alone!

[rg_girlca]

I have no advice, but just want to wish you all the best with Strauss. I am sorry that after all this time, Strauss & Sidney still don't get along. I had the same problem with my Mooky and my son's cat Sades, but now they more or less tolerate each other as long as they don't venture to close to each other.

Good luck.

[catmandu]

SADLY,THERE ARE SOME CATS,THAT DO NOT GET ALONG.PORCHERS NUGGET,AND SCRATCHY,ARE LIKE THAT,THEY FIGHT LIKE ALI,AND FRAZIER OUT THERE.
I AM LUCKY,THAT THERE ARE NO FIGHTERS HERE,THE WORST,WAS MAMMA CAT POUNCETTE,AND SHES BEEN REHOMED,WITH BABIES!
I HOPE,THAT THEY CAN BE KEPT,SEPERATED,UTIL,YOU CAN RESLOVE,THE MATTER,MAYBE FINDIND AN ONLY HOUSE FOR STRAUSS.

[catland]

thanks everyone. Yes, I use the "time-out" system, but that doesn't help much when we're not home.

I'm watching them now for the next time that Strauss starts to stalk Sid because I want to try something that I read on another web site. It mentioned scruffing the instigator (grabbing him by the back of the neck), kind of pushing the head towards the floor, and hissing at him. Supposedly this is supposed to help mimic the kind of instruction that he would have received as a kitten.

ah, the joys of trying to understand what goes on in their little brains.

We are determined to find a solution though - no matter what, he won't wind up in a shelter.

[slick]

Oh Julie I know how you feel. Max and Specks still get into their little spats instigated by Max. Most of the time Specks will back down but there have been times when she goes after him with everything she's got. I have no problems breaking them up, but I just hate it when they fight.

Hang in there...I know a solution is just around the corner.

{{{hugs}}}

Have you thought about letting them drink some wine to mellow out???

[shais_mom]

Originally posted by slick


{{{hugs}}}

Have you thought about letting them drink some wine to mellow out???

Actually Slick you are ON to something!
Have you tried the Comfort Zone or Feliway? They are a bit priciey but it might be a better alternative then rehoming a cat you love...
or contacting the Pet Psychic that several of us have used. If you want her email/numbers let me know.

Good luck.

[krazyaboutkatz]

Julie, I'm so sorry to hear this but I sure can relate. I had to give Cirrus back to his rescue group because he wanted to be the alpha cat but Storm's already the alpha cat. They would have daily battles and it was affecting both of them healthwise. They're the ones that had to have the PU surgeries. I tried time outs, also scruffing Storm's neck, feliway, spraying water, but nothing would work and it was only getting worse.

I decided that enough was enough when Storm became sick again and Cirrus also began lashing out at Sky. Now I have a peaceful home and everyone gets along. I know it's a difficult decision but you just have to do what's best for you and your furkids. Good luck and please keep us updated.