Kitty Friendships

[reikiessence]

So, i have had Terry (8 month old Domestic) for 5 years now.

Back in february i adopted a pedigreed Ragdoll, Terry was happy to play, until a bit bored, and would make clear to Lekira (the Ragdoll) when he no longer wanted to play.

We adopted another into our family, an ex show girl Ragdoll, 8 years old, who normally gets along with males fine, BUT now...

She is not interested in talking with either of the boys. Terry just whacks Lekira away whenever anyone is around, and constantly wants to be outside.

No one gets along with anyone !! they dont fight, only if they accidentally run into each other, they'll give a hiss and go their seperate ways. They sleep in the same room, but no where near each other.

Can i help them?

[reikiessence]

Anyone guys? lol

[barncat]

How long has it been since the new girl was added? If they sleep in the same room there is a certain measure of security going on. It may just take more time for them to settle.

In my experience with adding fully mature cats to a household, females are slower to accept each other and it may be years, if ever, before they groom each other tho they will usually play together (or at the same time) after a bit. Again, in my experience which may not be the rule, the males kept a low profile until the females decided how things were going to be sorted out.

Now, since the females are ragdolls it might be a size issue. Is Terry smaller than they are? He may be warning everybody off because he does not choose to be vulnerable to losing his spot as top-cat.

As I said, if they sleep near each other, I would not be too worried. Not all cats become buddies but most come to a friendly or at least civil accord.

Give Terry extra attention to help reassure him of his spot and to let them all see he is a valued member of the colony. Of course if he looks like he is hurting one of the others intervene, but it sounds as if he is just protecting his space. Let him see you play with the girls too so he learns everyone has an accepted spot.

Good luck. I've always had multi-cat households and there have been only a very few cats that didn't like or accept each other. Give it time.

[barncat]

oops... thought both the new ones were girls.. so the two queens-in-the-room stand-off might not apply, but again, the dynamic changes with each addition and takes time to sort.

hang in there!

(they are all "fixed" aren't they? If not, there will be more intense rivalry....)

[reikiessence]

Thanks for your reply! Yes, they are all fixed. The Ragdoll girl is much bigger, app. 10 kilos ( shes on a diet, don't worry!)

It seems that she is the more stand offish, although, its sort of... its like they like each other, but is afraid the other wont like them! Terry and Sophie both sleep inside, Terry on my bed last night, Sophie under it. They don't fight over food, they stay away from each other, and they choose to use the same litter tray, so i hope those are all positive signs!!

Wish me luck

Thank you once again.

[barncat]

Luck wished....

Truly it sounds as if all they need is time. You might talk to them about getting along. Whether they understand words or tone or body language, sometimes verbalizing the behavior you want helps it happen.

(I remember once I had a dog and a cat I thought would never be friends...fought and growled... for weeks. Finally I'd had it. The cat was upstairs growling the dog was on the main floor growling and I was on the stairs crying because I thought somebody would have to go. Swear that within a few minutes the cat came down and started licking my cheek, the dog came up and started licking the other and that was the last fight.)

Cats are very aware of body language and subtle status cues. You are probably right on target that they are starting to want to be friends, but being wary.... Think of sixth graders at a dance. Who will be the fisrt to cross the great divide and ask the other to dance.....