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Thread: I am so very sorry

  1. #1
    Join Date
    May 2002
    Location
    Rock Camp, West Virginia
    Posts
    5,108

    I am so very sorry

    I wanted to tell everyone that I am very sorry for all of the lies that I told here. I had no right and I am very ashamed of myself. I hope this post does not get deleted because I do want people to see it. I do not except anyone to forgive me. I do feel really badly for not telling the truth from the beginning I have felt so guilty for about it for such a long time.

    I do believe that my depression has over came some of my judgement. I've felt depressed for along time but I didn't know it would get this bad. I'm not even really sure what started my depression. Growing up I didn't have the best childhood my dad drank and my mom would hit me over dumb things. No my dad never did abuse me but seeing him drink his life away is enough. He is still drinking heavily even now and it kills me. After I had each of my kids I did notice that my depression was getting a bit worse but I still deynied anything was wrong. I have kept myself locked away in our house for a long time. I didn't want to go out and do anything or enjoy anything. My lying here just made things worse on me. Because the guilt was always there. It weighed so heavily on my mind that I drank to me the pain go away. I guess I used Pet Talk as part of my therapy.

    My husband has never abused me. I love him with all of my heart and I know he does me too. He just does not understand how I feel about our dogs being outside. I can not change that. I have tried to talk to him and change his ways. But he refuses to change his way that a dog should live in the house with us. Our dogs live in a dog run I let them in our yard while I am outside with them.

    I know I am not going change some members minds about me. That is fine. I understand if you do not want to forgive me. How can I except you to when I don't forgive myself.

    I am true what I am saying now. If you still can not believe me that is totally fine. I will be more then willing give anyone a real life apolgy if needed. Just give me a PM.

    If people want me to leave then I will. But I would like to stay if I can?
    "Careful what you say, careful what you wish or it may just regret it!"

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Feb 2003
    Location
    Pensacola Beach,FL
    Posts
    8,831
    please stay
    Owned by two little pastries!


    REST IN PEACE GRACIE. NOT A DAY GOES BY THAT I DON'T MISS YOU.

  3. #3
    ditto to lute.
    Krista- owned by Rudy, Dixie, Miagi & Angel

    Rocky, Jenny, Ginger Buster & Tiger .. forever loved & always in my heart..



  4. #4
    Join Date
    Jun 2001
    Location
    Arlington, TX
    Posts
    4,618

    Re: I am so very sorry

    Originally posted by Tina
    If people want me to leave then I will. But I would like to stay if I can?
    I don't know you. I don't know if you lied. Nor do I really care. It just seems to me that everytime your name appears people get pissed off and I for one am tired of seeing it. I'm tired of the fighting and I'm tired of all these apologies.

    Perhaps you would be happier on another board where you can start over fresh.

    Unfortunately if you do stay you'll be the first member on my ignore list.
    Last edited by PJ's Mom; 03-08-2005 at 01:39 PM.


  5. #5
    Join Date
    May 2002
    Location
    Rock Camp, West Virginia
    Posts
    5,108
    Fine I guess I deserve that. Though I did not mean to piss a bunch of people off here. Maybe I would be better off somewhere else.
    "Careful what you say, careful what you wish or it may just regret it!"

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Jun 2004
    Location
    Northern California
    Posts
    3,600
    I didn't want to reply to this... but, I do agree 100% with PJ's Mom. There has been way too much damage done here, for me to forgive. You've done nothing to me personally but a lot of people here have been very hurt by a lot of what has been said/done.

    I do *really* want PT to just go back to normal. I can't stand all this drama. I really do see this post as another attention-getting scheme... sorry, but thats how I feel.

    >__<



    <3 Erica, Fozz n' Gonz

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Jun 2001
    Location
    Arlington, TX
    Posts
    4,618
    I realize Tina, that you probably want a lot of people to ask you to stay. I don't think that will happen this time. I'm really sorry.


  8. #8
    Join Date
    May 2002
    Location
    Ploss's Halfway House for Homeless Cats
    Posts
    18,311
    I think PJ's mom is right. You need to play your games on another board.

    Bye!!

    Rest In Peace Casey (Bubba Dude) Your paw print will remain on my heart forever. 12/02
    Mollie Rose, you were there for me through good times and in bad, from the beginning.Your passing will leave a hole in my heart.We will be together "One Fine Day". 1994-2009
    MooShoo,you left me too soon.I wasn't ready.Know that you were my soulmate and have left me broken hearted.I loved you like no other. 1999 - 2010See you again "ONE FINE DAY"
    Maya Linn, my heart is broken. The day your beautiful blue eyes went blind was the worst day of my life.I only wish I could've done something.I'll miss your "premium" purr and our little "conversations". 1997-2013 See you again "ONE FINE DAY"

    DO NOT BUY WHILE SHELTER ANIMALS DIE!!

  9. #9
    Join Date
    May 2002
    Location
    Rock Camp, West Virginia
    Posts
    5,108
    Well what I just said is the truth. I am not playing no games.

    I will leave if that is what people want.
    "Careful what you say, careful what you wish or it may just regret it!"

  10. #10
    I do *really* want PT to just go back to normal. I can't stand all this drama
    ditto. Tina it's your choice to leave but please keep in contact with me somehow e-mail([email protected]) or pm me. I am really concered about your well-being Please take care of yourself and get yourself better by counseling whatever you need to do so you can go back to your kids and your animals(your number one priority). If I were your kid I would hate to see you like this and ask you to go to a counselor whatever helps. Please, Please get yourself some help, I hate to see you like this and you know some of the other people here do, too. (((hugs)))
    Krista- owned by Rudy, Dixie, Miagi & Angel

    Rocky, Jenny, Ginger Buster & Tiger .. forever loved & always in my heart..



  11. #11
    Join Date
    May 2002
    Location
    Rock Camp, West Virginia
    Posts
    5,108
    I was not looking for anyone to ask me to stay. Actually I am glad no one did.

    I am going go somewhere else and make a fresh start.
    "Careful what you say, careful what you wish or it may just regret it!"

  12. #12
    I was not looking for anyone to ask me to stay. Actually I am glad no one did.
    Lute and I did. So that means 2 people did.
    Krista- owned by Rudy, Dixie, Miagi & Angel

    Rocky, Jenny, Ginger Buster & Tiger .. forever loved & always in my heart..



  13. #13
    Join Date
    Jun 2001
    Location
    Arlington, TX
    Posts
    4,618
    Hopefully someday you will be able to stop using your illness as a crutch.

    My sister suffers from depression and blames everything she does on it. She's lied and still does, she steals and I will never forgive her for what she puts my mom through. It's very similar to what you do here, so you get little sympathy from me.

    Depression doesn't make you lie and put people through what you have over the last few months. Do you realize people cried for you??? How on earth can you expect them to forgive you for the emotional roller coaster you've put them on?


  14. #14
    Tina, after being lied to for almost three years, I'm afraid it would take at least another three years of you proving yourself trustworthy to have people forgive you for this. Had you realized your mistake sooner, and acted upon your apology the first time you came to us saying *Sorry*, things would have been different. Unfortunately, you lied again and again, even after apologizing many times. How can we know you really MEAN it this time?

    Honestly, I would like to see you as a happy mother, one who looks forward to everyday in life. God has given you the two most beautiful little girls, and along with that, the responsiblity to raise them well. Do you really want to give your sweet children the example of a liar? I know a parent would hate to think of their kids lying to them, but I want you to know that when a parent lies, that's exactly what their children learn. Take care of your girls. They need a mother with a stable mind. They need a mother who will set the most wonderful example for them to follow. You have so much to be thankful for. You have happy, healthy children, you have pets, you have a loving husband who cares for you and doesn't abuse you. If you realize how great these things are, you will know that you have a great fortune...a fortune that many will never have. There are so many women out there who don't have a roof over their heads...so many who have sick children...so many that have spouses that abuse them. Aren't you much better off? There are so many that have less than you...so many that suffer many times more. I know that when I'm feeling sad, counting my blessings helps me feel so much better. We all have blessings to count, and we all have blessings that someone out there will never have. If you realize how many bounties you have in life, you will realize you have so much more to be happy and thankful about than depressed.

    I want you to realize that lying is never the answer. The more one lies, the more he/she has to lie...to cover up previous lies. What's worse is that eventually, ALL those lies will come out in the open, and you'll have 100 times more lies to be ashamed of than what you started with. What's even worse than that is that children learn to lie if their parents do...and no parent ever wants their child to lie to him/her.

    Maybe its best for you, and for us, that you take a break from PT right now. A long break. Go and think things over. Think of what you've done. Do what you can to make your life better. Have faith. Count your blessings. Devote your life to yourself and family. You will be much happier. Your children and husband should be gems in your life...people who surround you, and make you happy. You too, should be a gem in their lives.

    We all try to understand here on PT, but truthfully Tina, you have gone too far this time. We may be able to forgive with time, but its very hard right now. If you're seriously suffering from depression, I would advise you to go and count every blessing you have. Everything. From your healthy organs, to having hands and feet, to having the ability to see, hear, and talk....to having healthy children, to having a loving husband, to having wonderful fresh air to breathe. You have so many blessings. You shouldn't have any reason to be depressed. If you truely are, then please go and get help, but don't sit at home and makes things worse for you, and for us.

    This is all I can say right now. I wish you the best in life and sincerely hope you'll learn that honesty is the best policy in life. Lying will only come back to bite you in the end. We all make mistakes, but the best of us are those who learn from them, and mend the problems we have in us. I hope you will find the courage to do that one day. Learn from your mistakes Tina, before its too late...before you commit too many to sincerely be forgiven. Take a break from Pet Talk and give us a break from this emotional rollercoaster you've been causing us. You should never play with peoples' emotions.

  15. #15
    Join Date
    Aug 2002
    Location
    Oak Creek, Wisconsin
    Posts
    3,843
    Tina, you really should read that quote you have in your signature and apply it to yourself. Well, I don't know what else to say except "goodbye, good luck with your future."

    :/
    LAURA {Human}, FRANNY {Boxer}, PEANUT, BUSTER, & NIBBLES {Rabbits}



    Thanks Roxyluvsme13!




    "The wind of heaven is that which blows between a horses' ears"- Arabian Proverb

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