Precious Penelope!
Dearest Penelope, what an adorable Pot-bellied Piggie you are! You are so cute, cuddling up with your dear person in those great photos, now and when you were just a piglet. You have the most delightful personality, too! You snuggled with your dear person at night when you were a piglet. You're very smart, and you learned to use the litter box the day she got you! You know several tricks and are also an escape artist. You and she are best friends, and you love each other very much, don't you. What a wonderful love-filled home you share!
Congratulations, darling Penelope, on being chosen today's Pet of the Day! We hope you and your dear person and all your family and friends are enjoying a fine celebration, full of fun and lovies and all your favorite games and treats.
I meant," said Ipslore bitterly, "what is there in this world that truly makes living worthwhile?"
Death thought about it.
CATS, he said eventually. CATS ARE NICE.
-- Terry Pratchett (1948—2015), Sourcery
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