Hello Wonderful PT! I know I have been absent for many months, but I have what I believe to be a pretty large dilemma and I know I can count on the good members of PT for solid advice and feedback. I am getting married next September, planning is well under way and we already have a TON of stuff figured out, BUT there is one thing that is really stressing me out and I don't know how to handle it. It's my (future) sister-in-law. We do not have a relationship of any sort, for the 7 years that I have been dating her brother we have never interacted aside from small family functions (she usually pretends I am not in the room) and she seems to resent me for some reason. I always feel very uneasy around her and I rarely say a thing to her anymore, in the past I always tried to have a conversation with her to break the ice, not anymore. I have been trying to figure out the reason why she resents me for a long time but I cannot figure it out, Josh does not seem to know why either. The one time I did hang out with her, we went to a Rascal Flatts/Taylor Swift concert and it was incredibly awkward -- she barely talked to me and played on her phone almost the entire time. When Josh proposed in July she never said a word to me after the big news was announced, she never said congratulations, asked to see the ring, or any other normal reactions most happy people would have. It has been 3 months now and I still have not heard a word from her.
Of course, Josh wants his sister to stand up in the wedding - which I completely understand- however I cannot cope with the idea of her standing up in the wedding; ruining my big day by stressing me out. I do not want her involved in any aspects of it. I have cried a lot over this ordeal because I feel really bad for Josh, I feel bad that I don't have a better relationship with her, but in the end I feel I cannot let her get in the way and destroy the one day I have looked forward to the most since I was a little girl. Recently, after a serious conversation Josh has agreed that she should not stand up in the wedding, but now I have to worry about the reaction I get when his mom and sister find out this news. Lord Almighty, save me now.
I guess I would just like to know what you would do in this situation? Do you feel my decision is justified or fair? I have never been faced with this dilemma so I have no clue what to do, my anxiety is through the roof. Thanks PT for letting me vent a little bit.
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