Just wanted to let you know....

[BarbPond]

Just wanted to let you know that I may not be here very often in the next week or so.

Got a phone call this morning and my brother-in-law passed away this morning. He was 71 yrs old and was healthy up until about a week ago. He was more like a real brother to me over all the many years I have known this wonderful man.

My sister (my only sibling) is not well at all. She is also 71 yrs old. They are not real sure yet what the problem is but part of it is Dementia, severe weight lost and a few other things. My son who is about 40 miles east of me is coming over to get me and take me to see my Sis. She lives about 50 miles north of me. He said he did not want me going alone.

Wayne is still in either Kentucky or Tennessee and on the way home. I have not told him yet as I dont want him upset while driving. I will tell him tonight and hope he forgives me for not telling him right away but I want him to come home safely.

Ok... crying here and cant see to type. Gonna call Laura.

[Freedom]

Oh dear, I am so sorry for you loss. Hugs to you and prayers for all you and your family at this difficult time.

[phesina]

I am so sorry to read of the sudden loss of your beloved brother-in-law. My deepest sympathy to you and your family.

[momcat]

I'm very sorry to hear about your loss. Please be assured that you and your family are in my prayers. Travel safely.

[cassiesmom]

Barb, I am so sorry for your loss and I'll be praying for you as you travel and make your visit.

Thinking of you,
Elyse

[Catty1]

OH sweetheart - {{{{hugs}}}} many times over! I am glad your son is going with you.

I had a sister who had a chronic illness and the last couple of years she was alive she was present only inside herself...could not communicate in any way.

Hug your sister, tell her anything you want, she will hear you.

More hugs...

[gini]

I am so sorry for your sudden loss. Please have a safe trip to your sisters with your son. How nice that he is coming to get you.

I will offer special prayers for you and your family to give you peace at this sad time.

[Randi]

Barb, I'm so sorry for your loss and for your BIL's wife. It must be so hard on both you and her.

I think you're doing the right thing not telling Wayne until he gets there.

Glad your son is going with you - safe travel!

[katladyd]

My thoughts and prayers are with your entire family! I have a sister-in-law I love like a sister, so I can imagine the pain you are feeling. Take care of yourself, okay?

[Laura's Babies]

OH BARB! I am sorry I wasn't here for you today... I've been at the hospital with my kids all day... their Dad had open heart surgery so I went along to be with my kids... Just keep calling and you will eventually catch me and I will try calling you..

[columbine]

{hug!} May you heal fully and soon.

Love, Columbine

[Lilith Cherry]

I am so sorry for your loss. Travel safely with your son.

[BarbPond]

Well I returned several hours ago. But had to tend to the kitties and make me some coffee first, and do a few other things before coming here.

First let me say I am handling Franks death fairly well. He has been a big part of my life since I was in the 9th grade and will be missed very much. I didnt have a daddy around but even though Frank was younger back then he was still kind of a daddy figure to me. He is the one who taught me how to drive a car, he talked to me about boys and so forth, and always gave me support and a shoulder to cry on when I was younger.

He was always there for me! He supported me with his wisdom through many rought times. When Wayne came down here before we were married for a visit Frank welcomed him with open and sincere arms to the family. He and Wayne got along really well and he truly like Wayne from the start. You could tell. It meant so very much to Wayne to be recieved that way.

He was the type of guy that would go out of his way to help make someone else happy. I have never heard anyone say anything about Frank that was not good. He was just a very gentle and caring man. He will be missed by lots of people!

Frank was a very well educated person. He had a Masters degree in Socialogy and spent his working years helping people who were addicted to drugs or achol. He retired several years ago.

I told Wayne about it tonight after he was parked for the night! Frank was the only real male friend Wayne had down here. But said he was glad I had waited until he was off the road as he had traveled all day through ice, sleet and light snow. Anyhow Wayne will be home sometime tomorrow. He, of course will not take another load out until after the funural.

Now about my Sister. Due to my health and hers we had not seen each other in about year even though she is not that far away. She is NOT doing good at all. I knew that but was totally shocked and unprepared for seeing what bad shape she was in. She has some sort of Dementia and has lost so much weight that she can hardly sit even on a soft chair due to it hurting her behind and hips so much. She is 5'3" and now weights maybe 89 lbs. Frank was doing everything in the house for her (with the help of their 3 daughters). She can not even get up out of a chair or the bed without help. She cant dress herself or bathe or anything. She cant even comb her hair or dont remember to do so. Now she was always the type that would not even go to the local store without cleaning up and fixing her hair. Such a change, it really shocked me!

There is no way at all she could live by herself. So her daughters are going to have to figure out something. One of her daughters, who has hubby but no kids, may end up moving in with her at least for a little while. But she will probably have to go to a nursing home. At this point the fact that Frank is no longer with her has not registered. Oh she knows he passed away but that is about it. She tried to talk a bit about funural arrangements but with no signs of sorrow. It was like she was talking about just a casual event. Maybe in a way that is a blessing.

Tomorrow I will be gone most of the day. I have to go clean her house as the daughters have so much else to tend to. Frank was a wonderful guy but he was not very a good housekeeper. And so many people will show up there after the funural so house HAS to be cleaned up. I was elected to do that. (they know I am a neat freak)

Ok I have rambled on enough for now. It does help to "talk" about though.

Thanks to everyone who sent their condolences and please excuse typo's and miss spelled words. Below is a photo of Frank and my sister Gloria.




Rest In Peace Frank

[BarbPond]

That is ok Laura! You needed to be with your kids.

So how is their daddy doing?

As I said in my above post... I will be going back tomorrow to clean up Sis' house.

Not sure what time I will leave here as I have to go to the drug store and get my stress meds refilled. We dont know yet exactly what the funural arrangements will be. They have to do an atopsy (sp ?) to determine exactly what caused his death.

He had had surgery the day before to get a very small cancerous spot taken off one of his lower lungs. After surgery the doc told them he was pretty sure he got it all and that Frank should be ok. Well during the night he got worse. He had heart problems but the heart doc said he was in good enough shape to have the surgery. He also had an anurism on the Aorta that runs through the stomach. They had very recently checked that but found out it had not gotten any bigger. Then all of a sudden his tummy swelled up really big. That in turn pushed the lungs upwards and interfered with his breathing. They had to put a breathing tube down his throat. He only lived a few hours after that. I am thinking it was the anurism that maybe caused his death. We should know something tomorrow.

No matter what actually caused him to pass away I know in my heart he has just gone to heaven and if I am lucky enough to go there also then I will see him again!

[krazyaboutkatz]

I'm so sorry to hear this. My thoughts and prayers are with you during this difficult time. Please take care. (((HUGS)))