Just hold the Hat; DON'T pet da Wabbitt!
Fire Department Christmas Party (many moons ago) ...
They hired an (amateur) Magician for the entertainment ...
He needed an "Assistant" (aka a Dummie) ...
I was Chief ... and got pushed up front to become the Dummie ...
"WE" did purdy good ... some small time card & coin tricks;
an endless scarf trick ... a cut & knot the rope trick ...
Time to produce da Wabbitt ...
I was handed da Hat ... told to hold it level with BOTH handpaws ...
OK ... <WHAP> - <WHAP> Swammi <smacks> da Hat wiffa Magic Wand ...
Grabs da Hat from me and quickly turns it over and hands it back to me ...
OMG! BUNNY EARS stickin up outta da Hat! HEY! There's a real, LIVE, Bunny
in dat Hat!!
I reach in with a handpaw to Pet da Wabbitt ...
NOT inna "script" ... Bunny don't like "strangers" reachin inna Hat!
Bunny made a Mighty Leap --- but Swammi was *quick* ...
One <grab> and Bunny's leap was cut short ... a fast <stuff> & Wand <WHAP>
and Bunny was back in his Hat/Cage;
I got a dirty look and and told "FOLLOW INSTRUCTIONS, Mr. Chief!"
Last was the "Antique Coke Bottle Shuffle" ...
Don't remember WHAT the object was, but it involved a REAL, Antique, GLASS, Coke Bottle.
He stressed the "Antique" part a lot ...
I sat on a stool, holding a cup-like container that could hold the Coke Bottle -
solid bottom, open top; nuffin fancy that I could tell.
Swammi did his thing ... Magic Wand <WHAPPIN> everyting in sight and
<swisshin> his Magic Cape ...
Coke Bottle was flyin in and out of my Cuppy-Thing faster than I could follow!
I was SURE it otta be in my Cuppy-Holder ... and he'd pull it outta my pants pocket!
Every couple of "moves" - when we ALL though I had it IN my Holder ...
He'd tell me to "DUMP da CUP!" and I was supposed to invert my Holder (over the concrete floor).
The Crowd would <gasp> but the prized Bottle was always "safe" and not in my Holder ...
Untill ... a big flourish of Cape <Swisshin> and Wand <WAHPPPIN> ...
and the command to "DUMP da CUP!"
"Uhhhhh, Mr. Swami, Sir ... *I* got da Coke inna Cup ... DUMP it???"
I wuz makin *frantic* eye contact, noddin my head towards my Coke Holding Holder,
not to mention stage <wisper> for him to "LOOK! - It's *IN* There!"
"DUMP da CUP!"
OK, Boss ... here goes ... <DUMP>
Swammi's eyes got bigger than the soon-to-shatter Coke Bottle Bottom!
Dunno what I figured he was gonna DO ... but I wuz just followin "orders".
Awwww, SH!TT! - What'd-ya-do-THAT-for!???
I was quickly dismissed back to my seat ... and Swammi started sweepin Antique Glass!
/s/ da Magic Dummie
/s/ Cinder, Smokey & Heidi
R.I.P. ~ Boots, Bowser, Sherman, & Snoopy
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