My own little(started little) rant

[cmayer31]

Well it's Friday again and here I am sitting at home... again. So for as long as I can remember I have been anti-social and it's been very tough to meet new people. For years I had my ex girlfriend who was an angel to me and I could go anywhere and do anything as long as I knew she'd either be there or a phone call away. Well, we were both young when we met and we have both gone through some very hard issues with each other and rescued each other, but sadly grew apart and although we could still be good friends more drama has separated us and I doubt we will ever speak to each other again.

Flash forward months later to now. I work my butt off Monday through Friday, but it is in a small office and an hour drive from where I live, so I don't meet anyone there. Due to the previously mentioned drama and other factors it is like pulling nails to get any of my tiny group of friends to go out. I swear they would rather sit at home and drink than at least go out and do anything.

So now I'm stuck because I have, in my opinion, poor social skills because I freeze up around new people no matter how comfortable I may be in my surroundings. However, I'm going insane with have no one to even go somewhere with. I haven't seen any movies at all; not even the movies that I would love to go see. Argh it is so frustrating and I have no clue how to fix either myself or the situation.

I do "lurk" here because one thing that I do love are pets and I find that people who care so much for their pets are almost always better people than who treat animals as just some inanimate object, or some doll that they can parade around and discard whenever. I can't post from work, but I can read the posts and it is always a highlite of my day when I get to see pictures and hear the latest tales of everyone's fur babies. I know my Riley has been my greatest friend and always will be because she always has a smile and always knows the right thing to do.

Anyhow, even if no one reads this I can take a deep breath and sigh because I do feel better letting this out and knowing that I won't get scoffed out. I know other people have posted about situations much worse with loved ones and themselves. Although I dont pray, I do feel the good thoughts go a long way and I do think good thoughts and best wishes for those who have suffered or have had to deal with loss.

Thanks for listening and I'll end the rant with this: Although I truly don't know anyone here other than from what I have read, I do belive this is the closest and most caring board that I have ever experianced and you all make this place great.

[Oggyflute]

Perhaps meet people through your furkids as such. Go to a dog park or something like that. Companionship can often come at the most unsuspecting times.;)

[Vette]

Oh! i know exactly how you feel. *huggies*
im like you in a lot of ways. i have issues with meeting new people. new people think im a mute...LOL
the thing is i dont like to talk either. even with people im familiar with. i figure silence is better then sticking my foot in my mouth. as a lot of the times the stuff i say comes out wrong,, or not even what i wanted to say in the first place.

and like you i dont like being by myself either.

[PJ's Mom]

I think a lot of us know how you feel. Trev has a great idea. Find a dog park or other activity that you can take your dogs to. It's a great way to meet people, and you'll often find a special person when you're not looking. :)

Good luck, and I hope we see you posting a little more often. :)

[G535]

You're probably trying too hard, just be yourself. I can't really relate to this any more but I used to be similar when I was a lot younger. I much prefer my own and animals' company now.

[Kfamr]

I'm very sorry you're having this problem. :(
I know what it's like though, Although I'm a bit younger than you (almost 18) I used to go to school (much like work), come home - play with my dogs and what not, go to bed and do the same thing the next day. I got sick of never doing anything and got more confident in myself. Although at first it took a bit to get people together and doing something, I'd just randomly call one of my friends up and ask them if they wanted to go here or there. Even if it was to just go to the beach to watch the sunset, it was nice and something to do. A lot of my friends (including myself) are into photography so it was a fun thing to do for us.


You know, there are a lot of people from California on here, and quite often people meet some of their best friends from online forums. I know i've met 3 of my best friends over the years from here, and although all 3 of them live in different states than me, we see eachother as often as we can.

Going to the dog parks and such is a great idea. Maybe even join some online communities that were made for people in your area(livejournal.com, myspace.com, etc.. have different city-oriented communities.) San Diego is a rather populated area (I think??) so i'm sure there's got to be some sort of online community out there. I recently this year met a guy off of myspace.com with common interests as mine and he's become one of my best friends. The best fun we have is going out and shooting pictures together.

Good luck to you. :)

Kay

[robinh]

First thing - welcome! We're always glad to have new people.

Secondly, there have been some very good ideas put up so far. I would definitely agree with the dog park idea. I struggle to talk to strangers and if I have one of my dogs with me somehow it seems easier.

Come often, lurk or post, doesn't matter. We're happy to have you here. Would also love to see pictures of your baby, too.;)

[moosmom]

Come often, lurk or post, doesn't matter. We're happy to have you here. Would also love to see pictures of your baby, too.

What Robinh said!!!

Welcome to Pet Talk!! Feel free to vent, rant, or just post about anything and everything. We're all cyber buddies, ready to chat, offer advice and most of all LISTEN!!

I wish I had some advice for you. I suffer from depression and am a recovering alcoholic (13 years sober!!) and that can sometimes be a nuisance to me. But I've learned to live with it.

I hope you will stay and become a member of this wonderful cyber family. We have all been there for each other. I hope we can help you through this difficult time.

((((((HUGS))))))))))))

Donna

[Cataholic]

First, welcome to PT.
Second, look outward, not inward. By that I mean, focus less on what you think you lack, and more on what you can do for others. Volunteer, help someone else out, do something for a neighbor, almost anything to just get out and about. There is a saying, that of course I forget exactly, but, it has to do with being a great listener, and how people find that those sort of people make the greatest friends...he he he..I guess cause we always like to talk! (well, some of us, anyhow).

As to going out vs. sitting at home, well, I am QoHS (Queen of home sitting). I don't like to go out. Not cause I am anti social, but, I prefer the comfort and convenience of my home, or someone else's home. So, invite people- just one or two- over. Do home projects...something to keep the hands busy and the minds off of 'socializing'. With practice, it gets easier.

I have told people before that I don't have a shy bone in my body. So, in a sense, it is probably unfair for me to make it seem so easy. But, things do get better with repeated exposure (well, not things like injections, trips to the dentist, or childbirth). So, practice away!

Good luck, and try out your social skills on us!