School troubles.

[luvofallhorses]

I don't know if you guys know the situation or not. If you don't then I will tell you. Please try to bear with me, since this is a long story. Okay this girl at my school her name is Megan and well I was walking up the hall awhile ago let's say approxmiately 1-2 weeks ago. I was walking up the hall because I asked my science teacher if I could go get my poster from my former class, which was health. The poster is special because it has my animals and my family on it. But anyways, I will get to the point. I was walking up the hall and these two girls Megan and I don't know the other one's name, but she looked familiar. Anyways, Megan asks her friend "Is that a boy or a girl?" I just was plain fuming when she said that! I don't look like a boy at all and you can tell I AM a girl. She could have not said that in my presence! I am a sensitive person and that really got to me. Then yesterday she asked me after I got a snack from the vending machine, if I was pregnant. I said no, you stupid b****. I don't look like I am pregnant either. Then I went to go get a candy bar today and while I was going up there, she said YUCK and I said Yuck to you(I was so upset I didn't know what to say). Does anyone have any advice on what I should do? Like report her, because this isn't the first time she has been a jerk to someone I am sure. Thanks for listening.

[kt_luvs_kitties]

I am not sure what you should do. BUT I do know if you act like it bothers you, then she will keep up with the rudeness. She is doing it out of immaturity, and I hope that she grows up and realizes that her s*** stinks just like everyone elses. I would try talking to a counselor or maybe a trusted teacher. At my high school they had a mediator, in private, and you could work out your problems there. I was always the one getting taken to mediation, and I NEVER even did anything wrong:rolleyes: Rumors get started and then they get twisted by each person that retells it, so best advice: Ignore it and tell a teacher. *HUGS* dont let one bratty girl spoil your great time at school:D

[MaryJae]

I'm sorry you have to go through that. Don't let anyone bother you, especially someone younger. Have a talk with one of your teachers or school counselors and see if they can do anything about it and help you out. If I were you, I'd do something about it. Get some of your friends to back you up and tell her off if she keeps bothering you every single day. It's really immature for someone to act like that and they need to learn. If you don't do anything about it, it'll make you look weak. Just tell a teacher or a counselor to see if they can help so all of this can stop.

If you need to talk, just feel free to IM me. :)

[Soapets]

Maybe this other girl is insecure, and "needs" to do this kind of thing because it helps her feel better about herself. Some people are like that.

One thing you MIGHT want to try, is to be NICE to her anyway, before she has a chance to say anything mean or nasty to you---take the initiative and surprise her.

I did something like that when I was about 10 years old and staying with my Aunt and Uncle for a few weeks. They had a Shetland Pony named Apache, and there were some kids that lived about a block away, and whenever I rode Apache anywhere near them, these kids came running out towards me, throwing rocks, yelling, calling me names, etc. I was scared to go near them.

But one day I made myself do it, and when they came running out throwing rocks and calling me names, I stopped Apache, and asked them if they'd like to have a ride on him with me. I totally ignored their negative behavior. They stopped what they were doing, and all of a sudden became nice, and we became friends after that. The rest of my time there in that town was a LOT more pleasant, and I went and played with these kids almost every day after that.

If being nice doesn't sound like something that would work in this case, another thing you might want to do is try to turn her words into a joke of some kind.

When I was in school, and kids did stuff like that to me, I turned it into a joke against myself, and laughed, and it took the tension out of it. For example, when she made the comment about you being pregnant, maybe you could have stuck your stomach out and started waddling or something, and said "Yeah, and I think I'll name my child after you!", and then laugh and ask her what her name is, or something like that.

One kid in my school told me one time that she really liked me, because I always turned things into jokes and made people laugh, instead of taking things personally and trying to get back at the person in a negative manner. It sure takes the tension out of a lot of situations, and it lets the other kid know that her comments don't really bother you.

If neither of these ideas sound like they will work, I would suggest that you talk to a trusted teacher or counselor about it. Kids shouldn't be allowed to "bully" others, which is what she is doing, and if you aren't able to resolve it with her in a positive manner on your own, you should ask for some adult intervention.

I hope this helps in some way. If not, maybe someone else will have a better suggestion. Please take care, and don't let her get you down, no matter what!

[petslover]

Some people are so rude. I'm sorry to hear that they said such a mean thing to you. I had some rude things said to me during school as well. Just let it go in one ear and out the other one. Don't pay attention to them. Someone like that doesn't need your time. I know you are going through a tough time with her right now. If she kept on, I would go to a teacher.

[chocolatepuppy]

Krista, the first thing you need to do is not let her know she bothers you. Laugh it off, and ignore her! Instead of saying things back to her try smiling at her. She's just wanting a reaction from you, if she doesn't get one maybe she'll move on to her next victim. ;)

[wolflady]

Kids are so mean. I know first hand, because I was constantly made fun-of and treated poorly in school. So much so that I don't even remember 1st - 8th grade at all. I must have blocked it out because it was so bad, but once I got to high school, things were better.
Anyway, the advice mentioned here is good advice. :)
It's just sad that people have to be outright mean to others for no reason. I do think it is to make themselves feel superior or better somehow. As hard as it might be, just ignore these rude people. You are better than them and they aren't even worth your time. They are looking for a reaction, and if you don't give it to them, they will get bored and move on.

**hugs**

[Laura's Babies]

I would comment to my friend as we walked by (loud enough so that she would hear) "It must be so sad to be her, she seems so unhappy".

Next time "She seems so unhappy, I feel so sorry for her!"

People like that cut others down to feel better about themselves. They have the lowest self esteem in the world and they have to point out others flaws or what they THINK are flaws, to make themselves look bigger and better... But it actually makes the look so small and pathetic.... sometimes it makes them look downright STUPID!

[luvofallhorses]

Soapets,

I laughed when you said like make a joke out of being pregnant. I know you were serious but it was funny. Thanks for the great advice! I just love this board you all are so supportive :) *hugs to you all* I will just make a joke out of what she said and not let it bother me. :) I will let you guys know how it goes. :)

[LoudLou]

Krista,

I have SO been where you are. It has been many years ( I sometimes still get it and I’m *Cough*Muffle* 34), but I went through the same thing in school. I grew up in a really small town. I have always been "BIG" and I have always been a Tomboy, so I grew up with people always asking, "Is that a boy or girl?" I know it hurts. Here is how I dealt with it:

There was this one girl who was a year older, her favorite thing to do was walk behind me in the hall between classes with her friends, and make all those rude remarks, “Is that a boy, or girl? I can’t tell. Aren’t those LAST years’ clothes…” Then the giggle, snicker, from all her friends. This went on for quite a while. I had never done or said anything to this girl, or her friends. One day I had enough and as we were walking down the hall and she started in, I spun around on my heels and in front of all her friends, asked her point blank, “What have I ever done to you to make you dislike me? You don’t know me. If making fun of other people in front of your friends is what you ‘think’ makes you look cool then I feel really sad for you. I thought you were better than that.” To make a long story short the fact that I stood up to her in a polite way, and put her on the spot in front of her friends, made her look un-cool. Her friends were embarrassed and left her there by herself to answer my questions. She ended up being a good friend during high school. I didn’t have any problems with her after that.

Hang in there, Krista. When school is over and everyone is out in the real world it will all change... Those who were popular and thought to be the ones to succeed end up not, the ones who picked on everyone who wasn't in their group might end up being the ones picked on, the geeks might turn out to be the next Bill Gates, the stoners might end up being the next Grammy winner, etc… After high school, it won’t mean a thing. The playing field becomes level again. Be and do the best you can now and plan for the future knowing that what your classmates may think about you now will all change over the years. What matters most is what YOU think about you. We here at PetTalk think you are something pretty special! Hang in there, Kiddo… The Best is yet to come!


Katie (LOUD Louie & the Beans)

[luvofallhorses]

LoudLou,

I am sorry you had to go through that:( I would never want anyone to go through something like that. You're right after high school really matters and my future. I graduate this June and cannot wait! :)

[kt_luvs_kitties]

I also have to add. I still live in the same house I did in high school, and I know about 15-20 kids from high school. GUESS WHAT! Other than those few, I have not even seen anyone from high school, maybe a couple, but the point is, I dont remember! Know why? Because I do not care. I dont notice them. they mean crap to me. literally;) After high school, it really does not matter at all. those people dont matter. their lives dont matter. NOTHING matters other than you and your life. So look forward to that, instead of those immature people. Think of it this way...
2 of the most popular girls in school, did not go to college. One got married right after High school , and is already divorced. The other moved far away and from what I hear, is doing nothing with her life. That is the way it goes:)

[sammy101]

Im sorry you have to go through this:( You've gotten some really great advice,and all i would say is i would ignore her,or just smile at her.People are sooo rude!
:mad:

[Soapets]

I'm glad it made you laugh---that's what it's supposed to do!:) Let us know how it goes.....

[NoahsMommy]

I guess you could confront her. When she says something mean, ask her what her problem is with you. Sometimes, people that act that way are only brave when there are no reprecussions.

I'm sorry you're having to go through this. If it helps, everyone has to go through it, it makes you stronger and helps you realize how hurtful mean comments are.

Hugs, sweetie. I hope it gets better. :)

[cookieluver7]

That is terrible, but wonderful advice has been given to you. You need to ignore her, and forget what she says. If what she says makes you upset then think about all the good things about you. I know there are plenty of things I can think of off hand. By the way, I've seen your picture and you are a beautiful girl, and do not look like a boy. If you ask me I'd say the girl is jealous. Good luck, and {{HUGS}}

[Oggyflute]

Don't let it get to you mate. Some great advice given, I like the bit on being kind back. If you can deflate there ego it makes them look like right twits. You are a good looking girl, and I sense a kindly soul within you, as I do with everyone here. Take the high moral ground and do not concern yourself with insecure small minded children.