CamCamPup33
02-17-2005, 02:32 PM
I'm sorry to complain, or to whine right now, but i just need to tell someone about how im feeling at the moment.. You guys don't even need to reply, i just need someone to listen...
Lately, i've not been myself. I've been sad, and i've been crying alot.. This week i have been feeling better, and actually felt happy, but now as i get thinking again, i feel sad.. I've been thinking about what exactly is making me feel so depressed, and i always said it's because it's "that time of the month" or "im just moody today." but after a week or so, i've figured out it's not any of those.. I was feeling SO happy this week, and then today i broke down again. The thing that i think is making me so upset, is my family, if it's not then i don't know what it is..
I haven't seen my cousin/aunt/uncle in SUCH a long time.. I found myself remembering how my aunt, uncle, cousin, my parents and us kids would get together on weekends and go to my grandparents house, and we'd spend the entire weekend doing nothing, but it was still such fun... About a year ago, my Aunt and my mom got into a huge fight. It's the stupidest thing really what their fighting about, i don't really even know how to explain it without laughing to myself. My grandparents basically took sides with my Aunt, and my uncle didn't talk to us because my aunt would be mad, and my dad didn't talk to my grandparents because they were going against their own son, and choosing sides. My grandparents still come over, but it's VERY different from how it used to be.. We never go over her house anymore, and barely see them... My aunt, uncle and my cousin moved to GA a couple of months ago.. We heard from them at christmas, but of course my parents being the stingy people they are, ignored the phone call.. I can't even tell you HOW many times i've had a heart-to-heart talk with my parents. I think they need to just be the bigger 'people' and apoligize for whatever it was they're arguing about. My parents tell me that constantly when i get into fights with my friends but i guess it's not the same. Yes, my dads parents did go against him, and yes my aunt and uncle are ignoring us, but IMO life is too short to be mad at family...
It's not fair at all to me or my siblings that we don't get to see our cousin, let alone our other family. Im very close with my grandma, or was, and now i feel like i can't talk to her like i used to. I just REALLY miss the old times we used to have, and it upsets me so that we can't just move on and go back to our old ways. My grandma was talking about taking me up to GA with her when she went to visit with my aunt, uncle and cousin, but when i told my mom about it she looked hurt as if i would rather be with them. That's not what it is at all, it's just i really miss them.
Im sorry to be posting this, and im not sure why i am, I don't mean to sound like i feel sorry for myself, or that im whining but i just really needed to get this out so i can be happy again.
Thanks for looking,
Amber
Lately, i've not been myself. I've been sad, and i've been crying alot.. This week i have been feeling better, and actually felt happy, but now as i get thinking again, i feel sad.. I've been thinking about what exactly is making me feel so depressed, and i always said it's because it's "that time of the month" or "im just moody today." but after a week or so, i've figured out it's not any of those.. I was feeling SO happy this week, and then today i broke down again. The thing that i think is making me so upset, is my family, if it's not then i don't know what it is..
I haven't seen my cousin/aunt/uncle in SUCH a long time.. I found myself remembering how my aunt, uncle, cousin, my parents and us kids would get together on weekends and go to my grandparents house, and we'd spend the entire weekend doing nothing, but it was still such fun... About a year ago, my Aunt and my mom got into a huge fight. It's the stupidest thing really what their fighting about, i don't really even know how to explain it without laughing to myself. My grandparents basically took sides with my Aunt, and my uncle didn't talk to us because my aunt would be mad, and my dad didn't talk to my grandparents because they were going against their own son, and choosing sides. My grandparents still come over, but it's VERY different from how it used to be.. We never go over her house anymore, and barely see them... My aunt, uncle and my cousin moved to GA a couple of months ago.. We heard from them at christmas, but of course my parents being the stingy people they are, ignored the phone call.. I can't even tell you HOW many times i've had a heart-to-heart talk with my parents. I think they need to just be the bigger 'people' and apoligize for whatever it was they're arguing about. My parents tell me that constantly when i get into fights with my friends but i guess it's not the same. Yes, my dads parents did go against him, and yes my aunt and uncle are ignoring us, but IMO life is too short to be mad at family...
It's not fair at all to me or my siblings that we don't get to see our cousin, let alone our other family. Im very close with my grandma, or was, and now i feel like i can't talk to her like i used to. I just REALLY miss the old times we used to have, and it upsets me so that we can't just move on and go back to our old ways. My grandma was talking about taking me up to GA with her when she went to visit with my aunt, uncle and cousin, but when i told my mom about it she looked hurt as if i would rather be with them. That's not what it is at all, it's just i really miss them.
Im sorry to be posting this, and im not sure why i am, I don't mean to sound like i feel sorry for myself, or that im whining but i just really needed to get this out so i can be happy again.
Thanks for looking,
Amber