Moving past tramatic experience? Help please

[aly]

I witnessed something terrible this evening at 5:00pm. I know it is still fresh since only 4.5 hours have passed, but I am having major problems getting it out of my head. I keep getting these flashes and having anxiety attacks.

My boyfriend is trying to help me, but he doesn't really know what to do. My animals are helping distract me, but I still keep seeing these images in my mind.

Does anyone know any technique or trick I can do to try to put my mind at ease?

By the way, it was a motorcycle accident I witnessed. I was first on the scene and so got deeply involved ... still shaking. I was actually really close behind the guy when it happened, but I glanced away for a second and then looked back to see his body in the street. I've never been in a situation like that before and there was a lot of blood. The man will be okay though I'm pretty sure.

[Aspen and Misty]

::HUGS::

O Aly, I'm so sorry to hear this. I don't know what to say to help, time will help though ::hugs::

Ashley

[micki76]

I honestly don't know, Alyson. I witnessed my neighbor's dog being hit by a truck and I had nightmares for about 2.5 weeks. I would replay the scenes over and over in my mind at various times throughout the day and night. I had to just work through it. I can still summon the memories as if it happened yesterday. I don't think you ever forget, but your mind will eventually put it aside.

I'm glad the man will be ok. I can't believe I ever rode a motorcycle! http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v15/micki76/Avatars%20and%20others/Smilies/whyme.gif

[Cookiebaker]

{{Hugs}} to you Aly. I know exactly what you are talking about: once was a motorcycle accident, and the other, I can't even speak about to this day. I don't know of any miracle cure to help you to forget, but the passing of time does help.

{{More hugs to you}}

[Karen]

Hugs to you tonight. Perhaps calling the police or the hospital, and getting some assurance on that guy's condition will help you sleep tonight. Take a blank piece of paper and write down every horrible detail that you saw - think of it as a "brain dump" and then fold that piece of paper up and put it in a drawer where you won't see it. That way if you ever need to give details to someone you have it, but can then forget it.

Then play with Lolly til she makes those growly silly monster noises that made me giggle when I saw/heard them back when we were in Texas. Laugh until your sides ache, and maybe some of the ickiness will go away.

Big hugs to you.

Not a medical professional, just a fellow human bean!

[NoahsMommy]

:( You poor thing, what a horrible thing to have to witness. :( Hugs to you.

The only thing I can think of is to keep busy doing something that wont allow you to think about it. Reading? Talking? Chatting on AIM. ;)

Hugs to you again. I wish I could help more.

Luv, Kelly :)

[Oggyflute]

Time does heal things, but it is important not to let these situations that you have been placed in overwhelm you.
I have been held up at work a few times, shot at in the Middle East, jumped upon by a gang in Singapore with chains & knives, and yes seen an horrific accident. (I had a somewhat excitable time in my twenties) To this day I can recall every single incident and how they played out. I never bring the subjects up but I can talk about them. With some of them it was a while before I colud do so. But with all, I sat down and thought hard about every incident when it happened and released that information from my mind. You could talk to someone, as in a proffessional, but I for one have never been comfortable talking about these things to a stranger. Your partner I'm sure will give you all the love and support that you need. Karen had a pretty good idea, and I reckon if you sat down with your cats & dogs and tell them, they will listen and give you big kisses after no doubt.

You have a good soul to be upset by this unfortunate accident, but the trauma should not diminish you outlook on things. Be well mate, and love your family.

[Barbara]

I think the only thing you can do at the moment is accept that it WAS a horrible experience. Nobody can expect you to be ok right after that.

I am so very sorry that you had to experience that, sorry for that guy but especially for you.

As to remembering or writing down I am not sure: these days it is said that push a traumatic experience aside in the first time after it can help just as much as talking to a doc or psychotherapist.

Try to be gentle to yourself: try to take stress out of your everyday life. Play with the furkids, take a hot bath (if you like that.) or cook yourself a nice warm soup (if you like that).

Good old time will change things- but not right now unfortunately.

{{{Hugs}}}

[RobiLee]

I'm so sorry you had to experience this. Big hugs for you. I have no advice for you. I do like what Karen suggested though.

I have had a similiar experience also and it still sticks with me. I saw a woman's body laying in the middle of a street after she had jumped to her death. It was not bloody or gory but there was just something very creepy about the way her body was positioned and knowing she wouldn't survive. To this day I can still see her foot in a wierd position and her tennis shoe laying close by where it had been knocked off her foot. *shivers*

Robin :(

[ramanth]

*HUGS*

As others have said, in time, the memory will fade. You may still have it, but it won't trouble you as much. Do you favorite things to keep your mind off it.

I still remember clearly the night Kia had her seizure. I remember the fear and the panic, but I don't let it get to me. Knowing Kia is with me now and all right helps me not think of it as much.

[catnapper]

{{HUGS}} Sounds terrible and I don't know what to say to help you move past it. I know a lot of times people go to counseling made specifically for people that witnessed events like the one you just were involved with.

[Logan]

How are you this morning, Aly? I hope you got some rest last night.

[Samantha Puppy]

It takes lots of time. When my neighbor was murdered, I thought about her and relived the events every day for sooooo long. Years. Now, while I still think of her often, the feelings I felt then are no longer with me and I am able to remember her with a smile on my face.

Just take it easy... It'll get easier with time.

[aly]

Thanks everyone, you've all helped me already with your comments.

I did have a rough night and woke up with a migraine. Still getting flashes of the scene and thinking of the man constantly. I guess I am lucky (and so is he) because it could have been so much worse.

Its just so weird because 30 seconds earlier, I was sitting behind him at a red light. I put my car in park because I didn't want to accidently have my car roll and hit him (I get nervous around motorcycles). I remember reading the back of his shirt and looking at his motorcycle. We made the left turn and I was right behind him. He must've started speeding because he ended up way out in front of me. We were just like 15 seconds down that road when I looked up and saw his body in the middle of the road. It was so scary. I stopped in the middle of the road to run and see if he was okay. Thankfully since I stopped traffic, another few men ran out of their cars to help me. I had 911 on the phone quickly and could brealy even form the words to talk to them. I'm really not good in emergencies at all. I guess I managed to do all that I could though. I also am not good around blood. I don't ever watch violence on tv or movies and so it was really, really upsetting to me. His whole head was just covered in blood. I'll spare you guys the rest of the details. I guess I feel even better now talking about it. The 911 operator was really nice as well. I think she may be the only reason I didn't faint.

The man was unconscious at first, but came to rather quickly. We managed to get him off the street and into the grass and he was sitting up on his own. I think he'll be fine, but I wish I knew for sure. I'm still not sure exactly how it happened. I have a feeling he was speeding and/or goofing around :( (this happened right across the street from a small motorcycle bar ... he happened to be wearing a shirt from that bar so maybe he was showing off for his friends and trying to do some trick? I don't know). A bunch of the motorcycle guys ended up running out and helping us too. I have really bad thoughts about the people who steered their cars around me, my car, his body, and his motorcycle and went on their merry way. I understand the people who didn't stop after a bunch of us had stopped, but there were a few cars initially that really did literally steer around his body. I'm just disgusted at that. There are no words to explain my feelings about that.

Sorry this became long-winded. It did help me though, along with all of your comments. Thank you all so much *hug*

Please, if anyone rides a motorcycle, wear a helmet.

[NoahsMommy]

(((Aly)))

You did an amazing thing and most likely saved his life. You should be very proud of what you did honey.

I'm so sorry you had to be in that situation at all, but you were and you preformed as needed. Good job, girl!

Those people that didn't stop are horrible. :mad: They'll have to live with themselves.

Take care,
Kelly :)

[Corinna]

As the wife and daughter of paremdics the advice is remember you did the best to help him. and look at the world daily for all the good images around you. Flowers, children ,and pets. Overload on good and the bad fades away. The advice to write it down is the best also while its fresh.
We have a saying at our house which we tell evey one we know No helmet no butt on seat. Tim has also worked on too many people on motorcycles to drive ours in an unsave manner.
Good for you for stopping you can not beleive how many people just drive around and don't help.

[K9soul]

Aly I can certainly relate to the emotional toll it takes when you witness such a thing. I haven't been involved in something quite that traumatic like that, with an injured person, but I witnessed a dog get hit and killed on the highway one day when I was driving to work many years ago. I was on the other side and pulled over, though the person who hit the dog did not :(. The dog dragged himself to the shoulder on the other side and collapsed. I couldn't get across because traffic was so heavy, but finally someone on the other side pulled over and pulled the dog's body off of the shoulder of the highway and spoke with someone who came down from a house near the highway. It was obvious then that the dog had died :(

I just sat pulled over on the shoulder, crying and shaking, was late to work as well, and I had a very difficult time getting over it. The dog got hit RIGHT next me, and all day I saw the flash of terror in his eyes and the horrible thump and yelp as he was hit in my mind, like flashbacks. To this day when I think of it, it hurts. I don't think there is any quick fix to get over it. You are a very sensitive person and things like this affect you deeply. In a way, you are probably going through some of the stages of grief from the experience, and likely it will just take some time. Do try to keep your mind occupied as best you can, and I think coming here and sharing your feelings is good too.

{{HUGS}} to you, you are a wonderful person Aly with a beautiful heart and soul.

[Cinder & Smoke]

Originally posted by aly

... I am having major problems getting it out of my head.
I keep getting these flashes and having anxiety attacks.


Aly ~

Try calling the Local Hospital that handles a large number of
Emergency cases and has a "Trauma Emergency Room".

Those hospitals usually have a "CISD Team"
(Critical Incident Stress Debriefing Team) or a
"CISM Team" (Critical Incident Stress Management Team) -
A group of specialist who assist fellow "Emergency Workers"
{ER Staff, Firefighters, Police, Ambulance Crews) when those
folks have a difficult time dealing with a situation they have encountered.

Best way to reach one of the Teams is to call the Hospital's ER -
and talk to one of the RN's on duty.
They usually have a Call List to refer to - and will have one of
the Team members call you back.

Here's a couple links you might find helpful >>>

Stress Reactions to Traumatic Events Brochure (http://www.tdh.state.tx.us/hcqs/ems/epcism.htm#STRESS)

Texas CISM Network (http://www.tdh.state.tx.us/hcqs/ems/epcism.htm)

Hope this helps a bit.

/s/ Phred
.