Need To Say Something.

[Tina]

I was not really sure how to title this post. Since giving up Jake to a new home. I have really missed having him around alot! Both of the kids have really missed him also.

I was very down in the dumps and feeling sick last week crying over giving him up. I felt it was the right thing do at the time and I could foster other pups. I'm sorry say but this is not for me.:( I really do not know how people do it. But I do admire them alot!

I thought I could do the foster thing and I really wanted to. But I just knew I'd fall in love with every pup I brought home with me. I'm so sorry.:(

My husband and I both talked it over and we decided that maybe now is right time for our 4th dog. We went in to the humane society on Friday and picked out a puppy. There was tons of puppies there and very hard to choose. I wish I could have took them all home!

We decided on a Golden Retriever, German Shepherd mix.:) We will be getting her tomorrow. I so can't wait! She had to be spayed before we got to bring her home. She is 7 weeks old.

I know there are going be people not to happy with me. That is fine and I understand it.

But I just felt we needed to give that little girl a special home.

I will be sure to post pictures when we get her home if anyone wants to see them.

[Samantha Puppy]

Okay, I didn't have an issues with the whole Jake thing but this is getting really silly. I think it's ridiculous to add on another member of your family when you don't even have a home right now. What happens when someone says something later on in this thread to hurt your feelings? Will you say that this one will be a foster too and find another home for it?

I don't know, Tina. If I were you, I'd have so much else on my mind right now - namely getting my home back, my children, my existing pets, my husband, etc. - not getting another dog, especially after only a week or two after you let go of Jake.

Would I like to get another dog? You bet! Does it not bother me that so many dogs out there are homeless and need loving homes, and that I technically could provide that for them? Yes, it bothers me immensely. But I have too much going on in my life to worry about bringing another dog into my house, not to mention the whole money issue - which I have to guess you're not exactly rolling in with what you're dealing... and the overall thing that causes me to think and live by what I've just said above is responsibility. I could adopt another dog or two, but I won't. Instead, I'll just give whatever I can to local rescues and shelters.

[moosmom]

Samantha Puppy,

Very well said!

[aly]

I agree with Jaime.

This is just getting kind of ridiculous. I consider myself patient and understanding, but I'm getting tired of this continuous cycle of animals you're going through. I'd advise you to read thorugh the Jake thread. You admitted you have problems you need help with. You admitted you can't even take care of your daughters sometimes. And you admitted to making snap decisions.

You've rehomed such an incredible amount of animals during the past couple years and are always full of excuses. Maybe it is for the better for the animal that you rehome them. But shouldn't that mean that you should STOP getting new ones?

I am terribly sorry for all of your tragedy and heartbreak. I think you need to buck up now though. Be strong and work out your problems. Don't bring any more innocent lives into this until you have absolutely everything resolved. And there's no way you could be 100% back to normal when you've had so many problems for so long.

If the pattern follows, after a few people disagree with you here, one of the following will happen:
- You'll delete this thread and possibly the others about Jake
- You'll go to General and start a thread asking why no one trusts you, everyone hates you, and people jump to conclusions about you (then later delete it)
- You'll start deleting massive amounts of posts about previous pets you no longer have

I'm not jumping to conclusions or passing any judgement, but my god, this has happened TOO MANY TIMES. Please stop. I beg you. I'm not trying to be mean, but my heart can't take all this. Seriously, I do feel bad for you, and I feel REALLY bad for the animals as well.

[Tina]

No I am not going say this pup is a foster.:mad: I told you that I can not do the foster thing.

Sure people are going say things that are going to hurt my feelings, that is just their opinion.

I do have alot on my mind and we are trying get stuff together so we can get ready to build. I take very good of my kids and the pets I have now. So please don't tell me I need to worry about them!! I do my best to be a great wife, mother and pet owner. But some people here just can not see that!

I also don't see how me adding another pet to our family right now is any different then someone renting a home. Maybe I am wrong and maybe I am not.

You can think whatever you want to think...that is fine!

[caseysmom]

It seems to me your trying to fill some void with these animals but you have a pretty full load already. I am 43 and have 2 daughters and 2 dogs. My cat gigi recently died, I had her for 14 years and I am soooo hesitant to replace her and god how I ache to get another kitty. I am not trying to be judgemental just giving you an older more experience point of view, your current kids...skin and fur need your full attention right now...I think if you really dedicate yourself to nurturing them that you will help yourself also.

Don't forget...adoption is a life long committment.

[Tina]

I said I had a hard time caring for them about 2 months ago. Because my depression had gotten that bad.

I'm doing alot better then I was and I'm taking very good care of my girls.:)

You know you can give me your dissaproval all you want. But it is not going change anything. I've done adopted the puppy and she will be part of the family.

[Kfamr]

VERY VERY VERY well said Aly and Jaime.

VERY.


:mad: :(

[Tina]

Ok, believe what you want! I'm not a bad person or pet owner!

I'm not going be deleting any posts.:rolleyes:

[caseysmom]

Have fun with your new pup Tina I really mean it...I hope it all works out well for you.

[Denyce]

YOU DON'T SEE THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN ADDING A PET TO THE FAMILY AND RENTING A HOME?!?!?!?!?!!?!?!!??!!?!?!?

One happens to be a living breathing creature that feels pain, love, happiness, sadness etc etc. What is wrong with you?

YOU...not others....but YOU have said in previous posts on other threads about the difficulties in dealing with your children and other pets and even in dealing with LIFE in general. You really need to get a grip on yourself and your life before adding another.

Right now the only words I can come up with is Misguided, Confused, Selfish and Irresponsible. You started down the right track in getting counsling but you seem to behave like an alcoholic only instead of thinking booze will make you feel better you think adding another INNOCENT life to your mess will help. Then when things get toooo hard again you throw it away.

I feel so sorry for the innocent lives you are dragging through your sickness. You truly truly need help Tina.

I didn't want to post on this however that first line set me off...*shaking my head*:( :( :( :( :( :(

Denyce

[Tina]

I Did Not say I don't see a difference between adding a family pet to a home and renting.

I said I don't see how it is any different adding a home where I am at now. Then someone else adding a pet to there home that rents. That is what I meant!

[caseysmom]

I think Tina's comment about renting is that since they don't own a home right now what the difference between renting and owning ...as far as having a place to keep her dogs...thats just my take.

In Tina's defense it does seem like she finds the dogs homes...I am not trying to get into it and I agree that it doesn't sound right to us but Tina if you have decided this its your decision.

[dukedogsmom]

Same problem, different dog and day. If you don't want to hear what we have to say about it, quit making these threads! That's all I'm saying on this.

[Tina]

So I am not suppose say anything about the new pup?

Oh, and there are not going be anymore of these threads!

[Samantha Puppy]

No, stop making posts like this one, where you try to validate what you're doing and then get upset when people call you on the mistake that it ultimately turns out to be.

[CathyBogart]

If you don't want to hear what you KNOW our response will be, then NO!

Good, I hope we can believe you. Stop trading animals in and out of your life like their lives mean nothing!!

[CamCamPup33]

Oh.. Wow.

Tina, if you said yourself you couldn't handle another dog right now etc... Why get another one?

You said;

I just do not believe right now was the right time for me to add another pet to our family. I need to spend more time with the pets I have.

You don't know how MUCH i think everyone agrees with those two sentences. Just think of it from our point of view, and maybe you'll understand. I mean, what if "something" comes up and happens and you have to get rid of this dog too, then will it be time for another one??

:( :( Very well said, Val.

[Tina]

I'm not trading animals in out of my life like they are nothing.

Like I said there will never be another thread like this one again.

[dukedogsmom]

One can only hope. And yes, you need to quit denying the way you are doing animals. But, it's been run into the ground because it never gets through to you anyway.

[Tina]

Nope, I am not denying anything.

[aly]

Originally posted by Tina
I'm not trading animals in out of my life like they are nothing.



Yes you are, plain and simple. You HAVE to see it and realize it for yourself in order for this to stop. It HAS to be thrown in your face.

Once agian, I have to say that we are not assuming things about you. You've posted everything on this site (most of which has been deleted), but many of us have seen the numerous threads where one animal leaves and then the next one enters. There are countless excuses that accompany each story.

And again, I'm not saying this to be mean or create conflict. I care about your family and about the animals.

I feel like I'm wasting my breath though. I don't know how many times things have been said. I guess this will be the last that I have to say.

[Samantha Puppy]

So you don't deny that just last month, in regards to Jake, you said that it was a rash decision, wasn't the right time for an addition, and that you needed to focus on the animals you already have... and miraculously two or three weeks later, everything's all better and it IS the right time to add another animal to your family?

Hm. :rolleyes:

[Tina]

Originally posted by Samantha Puppy
So you don't deny that just last month, in regards to Jake, you said that it was a rash decision, wasn't the right time for an addition, and that you needed to focus on the animals you already have... and miraculously two or three weeks later, everything's all better and it IS the right time to add another animal to your family?

Hm. :rolleyes:

Nope, I am not denying saying this. Why would I?

[Samantha Puppy]

So tell us, what changed in 2-3 weeks that made it NOT the right time when it was Jake, but now it is... and why this one will stick.

[Tina]

Aly, no I am not throwing my animals out like I don't care for them.:mad: My gosh if you only knew how much I loved them. But no you think "oh, she doesn't care!"

You are very wrong, wrong,wrong!!

My husband is not a animal loving person like you or I. He could have cared less if we ever had any pets. But yet he went with me to adopt this puppy? So he is bad also?

[dukedogsmom]

This bantering is useless. Everyone, stop contributing and the thread will hopefully, eventually go away.

[Tina]

Maegan is awake from her nap now and I need to get her. I can not explain what changed right now.

[My Peanuts]

I usually keep out of these kinds of posts, but this is truly unbelievable. You must be lying to the shelter about the # of animals you have re-homed in the past because that would have to be a very irresponsible shelter to give you another one.
:( :mad:

[Samantha Puppy]

You are missing the point of this thread, and the countless other ones similar to this. We don't think you're BAD. We think you're IRRESPONSIBLE. There is a difference.

Can I get another dog or cat or two? Yes. Will I? NO. Why? Because I don't have everything a new addition to the family requires. Do I feel bad for the animals out there in shelters, all of whom are deserving of furever homes? YES!!! So instead of causing problems with my existing furkids, with my husband, and with our bank account, I GIVE MONEY - whatever extra we can manage - to shelters and rescues. THAT is being responsible. If you have the money to adopt these animals, why not give the cost of adoption as a donation?

[aly]

Originally posted by Tina
Aly, no I am not throwing my animals out like I don't care for them.:mad: My gosh if you only knew how much I loved them. But no you think "oh, she doesn't care!"

You are very wrong, wrong,wrong!!

My husband is not a animal loving person like you or I. He could have cared less if we ever had any pets. But yet he went with me to adopt this puppy? So he is bad also?

Ok, now THIS will be my last thing said for real.

I have never said you were a bad person and that you don't care. In one of the Jake threads, I pointed out that I know you do love animals. I just think you have some major problems that are clouding your judgement and reasoning abilities. I guess that is why I always comment. Because I know you are smart enough to realize what you are doing. You can't help being depressed and I hope that you get everything worked out. I DON'T think you are bad, mean, evil, etc. Unfortunately a lot of innocent lives are getting involved in all of this.

I don't understand the reference to your husband. I don't know enough about him, except that he has made you rehome some cats in the past because he's not a cat person. I never called him bad though.

[micki76]

You can't see it and no matter what anyone here says, you never will.

God help these poor confused animals.

I hope you find the love (or whatever it is) that you're looking for and stop this. The worst part is that you're doing a horrible thing not only to the animals, but you're teaching your kids a horrible lesson: If it doesn't work out, don't put forth the effort to make it work, replace it with one that might. Not a good lesson to teach, and you're teaching it again and again and again.

I'm done. You don't even want to understand or see it.

:(

[Denyce]

Very well said Micki and Aly.

[dukedogsmom]

Can't answer the other questions here but has time to make a thread in other general.

[pitc9]

Well Tina, since you blocked all PM's, I'll just respond to your PM here:

We all are here because we love our animals, including you!!
It's just that sometimes it's easier to see what's going on somewhere from the outside looking in.
What you think you are doing is one thing in your mind, but we all see it another way. You think you're ready for another dog, you get one, and realize it was not the right time, so you find it another home, then you get another one... the cycle is just going to keep going on and on.
All we want you to do is take a few weeks and not adopt any animals, and enjoy the animals you have now!!

They all need you and they all love you!

[Jadapit]

I have been sitting here trying to think of what to say. The whole thing is just sad.:( I feel bad for you Tina because I honestly dont think that you are happy with in yourself so you are looking for a way to chase down that happiness. Kind of like a drug addict going after that next high. Hmmmm I really do wonder if what you are doing is some sort of an addiction!?!

I wish so much that the dogs that you already have gave you the happiness that you seem to want. I know the two dogs that I have bring me all the happiness and joy in the world. There were some pit bull boxer pups in our paper and it took everything in me NOT to call on them but I know now is not the right time for us to add another dog to our family. Why aren't the dogs you already have enough for you? I just dont understand that. Maybe you can explain it to all of us.:confused:

[Denyce]

So Tina...is it the Greenbrier County Humane Society at 122 N Court St, Lewisburg, WV 304-645-4775 that you are adopting this dog from?

[Tina]

No, I don't think it is any of your buisness anyways.

I'm adopting from a shelter in Virginia.

[aly]

Originally posted by sammy101
Just like to say,some of you are upsetting me so much about this subject.Your just say some rude things that i dont personally agree with.Were supposed to be here to HELP eachother,not bash eachother.I just dont agree with some of your comments.Just making it worse for Tina,that what it already is.Just my Opinion.

Tina!I cant wait to see pictures.I just hope that you can keep him this time.:)and im happy that your rescuing!

If I'm one that offended you, please specify so I can explain further. Maybe you haven't seen how many times this has happened. It is really hard to look the other way in these situations when we care so much about animals.

Man, why do I keep talking when I keep promising I'll shut up :o

[dukedogsmom]

Someone that's new here doesn't know what's been going on and really shouldn't be making statements about the rest of us. Also, those of you that offer support to her each time this happens just makes it easier for her to continue the cycle. It's called being an enabler.

[sammy101]

Originally posted by dukedogsmom
Someone that's new here doesn't know what's been going on and really shouldn't be making statements about the rest of us. Also, those of you that offer support to her each time this happens just makes it easier for her to continue the cycle. It's called being an enabler.

guess i shouldnt have said anything:( im not going to read this thread anymore...:(

edit-
Im sorry,i dont know about her past and shouldnt have said anything.I looked through some of her past threads,and im starting to realize what she's doing.Im sorry if i judged you:(At first,i didnt really realize what she's doing,just b/c i dont know her past that well.

[K9soul]

Tina, I hope you might reconsider this decision. I don't really have any thoughts to add except that I still believe strongly in what I wrote in my last post regarding Jake and you. I do think perhaps that fostering would be a lot of emotional strain on you, and there's nothing wrong with deciding it's too much for you to handle. I know that one counseling session isn't going to make you immediately stronger and able to handle what you're going through. My honest and best advice would be to give things more time, go to more counseling, and wait to add another family member until you are really stable emotionally and financially. Perhaps you could at least meet with your counselor again and talk things over before making the final decision?

I still think you'd get so much out of doing something with one of your older pups. Ginger seems so sweet with people, perhaps she would make a good therapy dog? I think you'd get so much out of taking one of the pups to brighten the days of the sick and lonely, I know I got a lot out of it when I did it with my collies. Perhaps it'd be something to look into.

If you have questions, or need to talk, you are always welcome PM me. Above all, try to be true to yourself and honest with yourself. That is what matters most.

[Pit Chick]

I may be new to this saga, but why would you keep purposely creating threads like this when you know you are going to get hostile responses?
Do you want people to feel sorry for you or do you just want to argue?
I'm sorry that you lost your house Tina, but if you couldn't keep your own previous pets because of that, why do you keep acquiring more only to turn around and get rid of them? From the threads you posted when you got Jake, it didn't look like you intended to foster him, but to keep him and then you give him up because you wanted him to have better life than you could provide. That's not how "fostering" works.
Instead of getting defensive and quickly answering back to everyone's responses, read through them and take them to heart. Everyone here is on the outside looking in and they see what you may not. Try trusting what they trying to say because they apparently care about you and the animals. Take care of the pets you have now, they need you, not another puppy to stress them out. There are other ways to help animals than bringing them all home.

[cali]

congrats on your new pup :D and I really mean it :)

everyone else, would you rather her get a new dog and say nothing then when she goes to post pics of her new baby guess what will happen... eveyone will start yelling and screaming at her saying she is a terrable person etc.. and dont even think of denying it. if you guys hink she is posting just to justify it, well on this board people make you feel like you have to have a reason for everything, for example I always feel like I have to have an exuse for everything on this board.

[Lexi_Lover]

Congrats on your new pup!:D I can't wait to see pics! You can PM them to me if you like.

Could you please allow PM or e-mail to come through, I would really like to tell you something!:)

[sittingprettier]

I am curious as to just HOW MANY other dogs she has 'gone thru'.
maybe by showing her a definate LIST of the numbers it will make it even more real to her and she won't be able to block it as some say she does.

However, please, I would love to get some real examples of other posts that she has given where the dogs come from the shelter, are loved for a few weeks and then she can't handle them anymore and they are discarded. That is not right.

That is something that as someone said, needs to have her be reported to a few of the shelters in her area - stop her now.

Tina, I have done fostering and I love the freedom and special feeling I get from that. Knowing that a dog I have loved and socialized and worked with is going onward to a better place and a happier home is wonderful.
But many many people can't handle it. That doesnt mean that you keep adopting dogs, it means that you love the ones you have. You don't want to end up like the bag lady on the Animal Planet show where they have her and the 9 dogs that they have to pull in and the dogs are all manged and underfed and maybe they are loved but gosh, would have been better if it had just been two dogs in the house. Think about it.

[Samantha Puppy]

Originally posted by cali
eveyone will start yelling and screaming at her saying she is a terrable person etc.. and dont even think of denying it. I just reread all four pages and I found no one that said she was a terrible person. I found many people, however, that said she was acting irresponsibly.

This is called constructive criticism. We are trying to help her see why what she's doing is messed up. We're not saying "Tina, you're stupid!" or "You suck!" - that is mean, as well as unnecessary. Let me try to put it into something on your level...

... If you stay out past your curfew, what do your parents do when you finally get home? Say "Cali, you suck!" and that's it? No. They probably tell you why what you did was IRRESPONSIBLE, why they're disappointed, and then discipline you in some fashion.

That's exactly what we're trying to do, save the discipline. We're letting her know that what she's doing is irresponsible and why we're disappointed, and hoping that one of these days what we say actually sticks and this situation doesn't repeat itself over and over and over and...

[wolf_Q]

(posted 11/24/2003)

Originally posted by Tina
Sometime between Tuesday and Thursday evening about 2 weeks ago Ruff passed away.

How can you not know what day your own dog died? It was shocking to me to read when it was originally posted. So many other animals of Tina's have been lost since then...it's just sad. I do not think she doesn't love her animals, I'm sure she does, but whether or not she has the ability to care for them is the question in my mind.

Tina, PLEASE stop getting more pets. For your sake and theirs.

[Sevens]

Here is some information about Virginia.

The western side of Virginia that borders West Virginia... the only applicable telephone area codes are 540 and 276.

Animal Control/Pounds in VA by city (http://www.saveourshelters.com/virginia_animal_pounds.htm)

Animal Shelters in Virginia by city (http://www.netpets.com/cats/catresc/virginia.htm)

[shais_mom]

Originally posted by cali
congrats on your new pup :D and I really mean it :)

everyone else, would you rather her get a new dog and say nothing then when she goes to post pics of her new baby guess what will happen... eveyone will start yelling and screaming at her saying she is a terrable person etc.. and dont even think of denying it. if you guys hink she is posting just to justify it, well on this board people make you feel like you have to have a reason for everything, for example I always feel like I have to have an exuse for everything on this board.

this is pretty funny coming from someone who PURPOSELY went to another board and LIED to them to start trouble -

[shais_mom]

She needs to
STOP getting more animals and STOP telling us all this stuff and STOP making threads about how people hate her -
getting more animals won't bring you out of you're depression -
THERAPY will.
And to the kids that support her - spoken just like people who have nooooo clue - do the research

[Thandi]

Originally posted by shais_mom
She needs to
STOP getting more animals and STOP telling us all this stuff and STOP making threads about how people hate her -
getting more animals won't bring you out of you're depression -
THERAPY will.


Ditto!

[NoahsMommy]

I don't live with you, so I don't know your situation, but, I've gone back to read threads from when you first adopted Jake. They helped me to see that there is a problem with you using animals to help you feel better. Again, while I don't know, it would seem that once you realize they are a lot of work and that this time doesn't seem good for a new addition, you find them a home. While its really good to foster, you've said yourself that its not for you.

Maybe if you were to look back at all the threads you've made about your past animals, it would help you to see the Tina we see. The impression I'm getting from you is that we have you all wrong. Like someone already said, we only know what you've told us.

From what you've told us, this new puppy is just a repeat of Jake. The only conclusion we can gain from your husband wanting to adopt the new puppy is that you share the same ideals regarding animals.

To me, it seems as though you are using these animals for two purposes:
1) to get that "high" of having a new thing to play with
2) to get that "high" of being upset about something

As a pscyh student, what I've learned from your threads is that you seriously need to get some meds and some weekly therapy. You have human children to care for...you need to get help, if only for them.

I've never been mean to you, I've always been nice and polite to you. I hope you will view my response in the manner in which I've written it, with care and concern for all involved. We don't hate you, we just want everyone involved to be OK.

Take care and I hope you'll be back at PT when you're feeling better about yourself.

[Pit Chick]

Well said Noah's Mommy! :cool:

[sammy101]

--*sigh*--

i wish this would ALL stop,breaks my heart to see all of this:( :(

[Kfamr]

Originally posted by sammy101
--*sigh*--

i wish this would ALL stop,breaks my heart to see all of this:( :(


That's our same thoughts.
So many of us wish Tina's behavior would stop, and it hasn't. How many animals have to be rehomed, "mistakes" made, before it stops? Who knows. :(

[Christiansmommy]

Very nicely said, Noahsmommy!!

This is my take...We all have the right to comment on this, b/c Tina did start the thread afterall...but...it is a known thing that she has a problem with depression...i think things *need* to be said with more tact. I know, that if I have issues, and someone responds to me negatively, I am more apt to feel even crappier than I already did...K9Soul and Noahsmommy replied in a compassionate mannor, not in a judgemental manner. I mean, we all know that she has some depression problems, lets try to reason with her, and offer out 2 cents in a more caring mode. Sure, you can say that it is becoming a recurring problem here, but still, I don't feel like it is right to be harsh to someone who has depression problems. She doesn't need to be crying at home over our responses ( if i were her, *I* would be), b/c they come across as harsh...it is just as easy to say, " Please let us help you, in some way" If she gest convicted over the fact that maybe we are right, and a dog isn't in her best interest right now, then at least she came to that conclusion with our caring support.

I just hate to see people hurting, and clearly, Tina has some issues that she knows she needs to deal with...lets not add to them. If you can't say anything without being more careful of the way you word it, then don't say anything, maybe she would getr the point, by no one responding and it could have the same effect, minus the judgemental replies. Hey, I am sorry, I felt she needed someone sticking up for her...I know people who are depressed, anf therefore, it hits home to me, they need support more than anything...or they keep getting pushed deeper into a hole...sorry, but i had to say this.

I do agree, that maybe these animals are trying to fill a void in her life, and are a temporary high for her, but i think the best advise we can give her, is to make sure she seeks more medical help...for her depression...

Robyn