Feel bad...

[LorraineO]

Well I wont be posting for a few days I dont think,, I have a few things going on in my life with DOGS and things arent going well... Plus I feel if I open up,, I might get jumped on as it were,, so I will be the coward and say not much for now until I feel braver....... but I will check in on things for sure!!!

Hope you all have a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year!!!

Lorraine O and family

[tatsxxx11]

Oh no:( Please don't feel bad:( I think I know what's upsetting you:( {{{HUGS}}} Hey, you come here and talk whenever you need to, ok??? Maybe we can help:)

[anna_66]

Oh Lorraine, I hope it's not what I think it is:(

I hope you can get things worked out and come back soon.

Take Care & have a Very Merry Christmas.

[Jods]

Oh no I think I know what happend as well I'm going to Pm you... Remember stuff happens.

[Tollers-n-Dobes]

I'm also pretty sure I know what might have happened:( I hope everything will be alright...

[Jadapit]

I have a feeling I know what might be going on and I'm sure it is very upsetting. You hang in there and you and your family have a very Merry Christmas!!

[Cincy'sMom]

Just remember sometimes the best thing, isn't the easy thing...and you have to do what you fell best.

We are here when you are ready to share.

[K9soul]

Lorraine I have not been around a lot lately and don't know all the particulars of what has been going on, I do recall seeing that you were planning to add another dobie to your family. I'm sure no matter what, you will do as you feel is best for all involved, and I hope you will feel you can share your problem without fear of being judged.

Whatever is going on, my thoughts and prayers are with you {{Hugs}}

[chocolatepuppy]

Lorriane, A very Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year to you and your family! :)

[Kfamr]

I do believe I know what has happened, and If it's so, please don't feel afraid to say. Things happen.

[caseysmom]

I have no idea what happened but you seem like a very caring person and I would not judge you. I hope it all works out and you can enjoy the holidays.

[aly]

Hey Lorraine,

If you need any advice on dog issues, you can email me if you want. I won't breath a word of what is happening to anyone. I counsel people at the shelter on tons of issues surrounding adding a new dog to the household. I'm sure no one will jump on your back if you explain your situation on here.

Anyway, my email addy is [email protected] in case you need advice on anything!

[tatsxxx11]

That's so sweet of you Aly:) Maybe a little intervention is what's needed right now:)

[LorraineO]

Sigh,,, youre all very sweet to say all those nice things,,,,,:) I really appreciate it so much.....

Ajay has some serious issues with other dogs and we just dont feel he is truly suited to a house with other animals... at least not ours. Lucy is simply becoming mor stressed out at his prescense in the house,, and we cant get them within 8 ft on loose leashes without her cowering and him growling and trying to lunge at her... Merlin has made some progress with him,, but even he seems stressed as he does nothing but whine all the time, We havent been able to leave any of them alone for a second,, even with a gate between them and there has been one since ajay got here last Saturday.. Despite being told he was raised with yorkies and cats,, we just dont believe its true,, he has such huge issues with our two.. and they have been super calm since he got here!!! If we had no other dogs,, we would spend as much time that was needed to get him adjusted,,, he is comfortable with us and our son,, but not our dogs... and thats an obvious problem...
so after a few tears and much discussion after dinner tonight,, we thought it best to cut it now and take him back before he gets too settled here,,,, He is such a sweet swwet boy,, all he wants is rubs and pats..... its utterly has left me bereaved despite only knowing him this short time.. HOW does one explain to a pet that it wont work? You cant,, and thats what breaks my spirit.... i SO wanted this to work...... i really did,,, and now I m left with the thoughts and guilt of a lovely Dobie boy who needs a bit too much more then we have to give..... its sooo frustrating,, I just wanna curl up and cry til I cant cry anymore!!!!!! The guilt I feel is overwhelming,,, so I suppose there isnt much anyone could say to make me feel worse.........:( :( :( :( :(

Poor sweet Ajay.......

[Jods]

You know whats best for you and your family. He will find a good home I'm sure, you did your best.

[dukedogsmom]

That's one of the reasons that I haven't gotten another dog. I know Duke just couldn't handle it. You might want to pm Samanthapuppy because she had something similar happen. You can only give so much and if it's not enough, you can't help it. I do hope when someone else tries to adopt Ajay, that they will be told the truth about him so he will get a chance. Those people ought to be shot for lying about him. It's unfair all the way around. Dry your tears and try to have a good Christmas. I sort of know how you feel in a way. I've kept numerous dogs here overnight(strays in the road) until I could take them to animal control. I know that's not much better but it's better than seeing them dead in the road. I cried each time I took one there because I pretty much knew their outcome.

[ParNone]

Sorry it didn't work out, Lorraine. I do think it's possible though for him to have gotten along with the Yorkies and not with your two and that they weren't intentionally lying to you. I know with Murph, if he was fostered in a family with Goldens, they'd think he was just so dog friendly. They'd then be in for quite the surprise, if they turned around and plopped him down in a family with other terriers. I don't think it's always so black and white, that they love all dogs or don't. Some of'em can be quite discerning.

Par...

[Thandi]

My sympathies, Lorraine. Do what is best for your family and your animals. Things have a way of working out, and please don't feel badly--you tried your best.

[aly]

I'm so sorry it hasn't worked out. I agree that you should try your hardest to make it work if it was just people in the household, but you have to think about your other dogs first and make sure they are okay. Usually the first 2 weeks a dog is in a new environment is the adjustment or "honeymoon" period. Around the 2 week mark, the behavior will change, sometimes for the better and sometimes for the worse. Its hard to tell which way it could go. If you want to give it another week, you could see how that goes, but if not, at least you know that you put your current babies first. I'm sure the rescue will find Ajay a great home.

Oh by the way, I think its very possible that he lived with and got along with Yorkies and cats. I really don't think they lied to you about that. Yorkies and cats are very small and not a threat at all to him. But he might look at your two large dogs as a huge threat just because of their size. Anyway, it is good information for the rescue group to have now so this won't happen again.

My thoughts are with you and Ajay.

[Prue]

I'm so sorry it didn't work out. :(

Ajay sounds like a gorgeous dog and I'm sure he'll find a loving home. My thoughts are with you. ;)

[pitc9]

Oh Lorraine, I feel so bad for you! But as sweet as he is, I think a great home could be found for him in no time!! My prayers and thoughts are with you.

*~Hugs~*

[Cincy'sMom]

Like I said before, sometimes the best thing isn't the easiest. thing. And when you think of adding a new dog to your family, you have to be respectful of the pets that are already there. It sounds like you guys really tried hard to make this work, but he just isn't in the right home yet. As hard as that decision is to make, it sounds like it will be best for all the animals involved.

We we decided to save Spot (he was to be PTS the day before we rescued him), we knew very little about him, including if he got along with other dogs. The decision was made before we got him, if it didn't work with our girls, they came first, and we would get him into a rescue to be sure his life was saved. In our case, it worked out perfectly, but it doesn't always. But Ajay has a safe place to return to, and I'm sure the perfect home is out there for him.

[K9soul]

I couldn't say it any better than Cincy's Mom did, and I agree with everything she said 100%. Lorraine, despite the difficulties and heartbreak, I hope you and your family can have an enjoyable Christmas.

[Cazi]

Originally posted by LorraineO
Sigh,,, youre all very sweet to say all those nice things,,,,,:) I really appreciate it so much.....

Ajay has some serious issues with other dogs and we just dont feel he is truly suited to a house with other animals... at least not ours. Lucy is simply becoming mor stressed out at his prescense in the house,, and we cant get them within 8 ft on loose leashes without her cowering and him growling and trying to lunge at her... Merlin has made some progress with him,, but even he seems stressed as he does nothing but whine all the time, We havent been able to leave any of them alone for a second,, even with a gate between them and there has been one since ajay got here last Saturday.. Despite being told he was raised with yorkies and cats,, we just dont believe its true,, he has such huge issues with our two.. and they have been super calm since he got here!!! If we had no other dogs,, we would spend as much time that was needed to get him adjusted,,, he is comfortable with us and our son,, but not our dogs... and thats an obvious problem...
so after a few tears and much discussion after dinner tonight,, we thought it best to cut it now and take him back before he gets too settled here,,,, He is such a sweet swwet boy,, all he wants is rubs and pats..... its utterly has left me bereaved despite only knowing him this short time.. HOW does one explain to a pet that it wont work? You cant,, and thats what breaks my spirit.... i SO wanted this to work...... i really did,,, and now I m left with the thoughts and guilt of a lovely Dobie boy who needs a bit too much more then we have to give..... its sooo frustrating,, I just wanna curl up and cry til I cant cry anymore!!!!!! The guilt I feel is overwhelming,,, so I suppose there isnt much anyone could say to make me feel worse.........:( :( :( :( :(

Poor sweet Ajay.......

I feel for you Lorraine, but you have made the right decision.

A very good friend of mine went through a similar thing about 6 months ago. She bought another BC for company for the one she already had. She never anticipated any problems as her BC gets on extremely well with Amber.

However, it wasn't to be. Her BC hid in a cupboard and wouldnt come out for anything. They practically had to drag her out for toiletting. 2 weeks later and she was just the same. She tried and tried to get both BC's together, but her first one was fast becoming a nervous wreck.

My friend was in an awful mess; she broke her heart at my house as she just did not know what to do.

There was a happy ending as my fellas boss mentioned that he was thinking of getting another BC to help on the farm. Max, as he was to be called, has been on the farm ever since and is having a wonderful time.

My friends BC is back to her jovial self, but my friend still feels guilty to this day.

Unfortunately, some things are just not meant to be.

[LorraineO]

Well we took Ajay back today,, it wasnt pleasant as his foster mom really didnt have a proper place for him,, so unfortunatly,, he might have to go to the pound for a few days until she has an opening in her Kennel/rescue place..... That news of course made me feel even lower then low!!!!! but I just couldnt keep him the extra week almost she was wanting knowing we wernt keeping him PLUS my dogs were getting worse with thier emotions etc....

I only pray that Ajay forgives us,,,,, he is such a sweet sweet boy,,,, We will keep in touch and make sure he finds a new home,,, if worse comes to worse,, hubby said we would take him back if he were to be put down and find him a new home ourselves!! Putting him down isnt an option!!!! I hope he doesnt wind up at the blasted pound and she works something out at her crowded place!!!!! He left with his brand new cushion, dish rubber mat to match and a Xmas stocking full of stuff plus his new giant Kong.... I also included a small letter to go with him to his new owners from us telling them what he likes and such and that we loved him alot but couldnt keep him as he didnt agree with our two dogs...

THANK you all so much for your kindness and comfroting words.... you just have no idea how much it means to me....


Lorraine O

[LKPike]

Lorraineo - before adopting a dog you should let your current pets meet the new dog on neutral ground, where neither of them have claimed it as "their" territory. I didn't read your first posts about getting a new dobie, but I'm sorry this rescue/adoption didnt work out for you guys :(

[KYS]

I am very sorry to hear that the adoption did not
work out.

(((HUGS)))

karen

[LorraineO]

Originally posted by LKPike
Lorraineo - before adopting a dog you should let your current pets meet the new dog on neutral ground, where neither of them have claimed it as "their" territory. I didn't read your first posts about getting a new dobie, but I'm sorry this rescue/adoption didnt work out for you guys :(

We did,,, 3 times before he came home,,, you must not have read my previous posts regarding this adoption....This isnt our first adoption,,, we know how toi ntro dogs and all.... We knew it would be a bit of work,, but after a full week,, Ajay made NO progress past what he had made during the first meetings...

[delidog]

Lorraine,
My heart goes out to you & Ajay!!!
I know this was such a difficult decision for you...
You did what was necessary...
Ajay will find a Forever Home...He is a beauty!!!
But you have your other Furkids to think about...
I know how bad you must feel,I am sorry....I hope all goes well

[shais_mom]

You have done you're best.
Sometimes things don't work out to NO fault of your's or the animals.
I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers tho. Sounds like beautiful Ajay needs to be an only dog.

[wolf_Q]

So sorry that things didn't work out with Ajay. :( I think we all understand that you have to put your current dogs first. I'm sure he will find a wonderful home with no larger dogs.

[LorraineO]

That poor boy,,,, well he isnt at the pound,, he is staying at her borading kennel,, but seeing how its so crowded with the holidays,, the poor boy is stuck in his crate most of the day and he is EXTREMELY stressed out and crying constantly,,, oh dear,,,, poor sweet Ajay,,, he does hate that crate,, we jut took him out of it and he did well,, I cant imagine how bad he must feel now..... Crap,, Thought I felt bad,, now I feel even worse then before.....

Man,, I suck for not trying harder,,, yet I know it wouldnt have worked,,, WHY do I have to love that sweet Dobie boy so much?????????:( :( :(

[LKPike]

Why don't you search for a dog trainer/behavorist and ask them what they think you should do and if they could help?? itd probably take alot, alot of work but eventually they (the pets) might just start to accept each other :) Ajay shouldn't be in a crate most the day :( thats just not fair or right :(

[LorraineO]

I am about to ask her how much time he is spending in the crate,, I suspect she has him out as much as possible... if anything,, it wont be for very lonng,,, the 28th at the longest he will have to spend time in it,, after that,, the boarding kennels will have rooms for him to be put in and out of that crate,,, he is miserable for now,, but it could be worse!!
At this point ,,, I suppose we could look for a behaviourist,, but after Xmas and such,,, who has money for that?? I know I dont! Also,, I am heartbroken enuff as it is,, and if it were to not rok even after that,,,, not only would we be even more upset,, but what would poor Ajay think??? He would be SO screwed up!!!:( I feel his forever family is out there and they will find eachother,,, I truly think he needs to be an only child....

[pitc9]

I think you are right, he needs to be the only dog in the house.
You tried, and it just didn't work out! I wish I could give you a hug right now!! How about you wrapping your arms around Lucy and Merlin and giving them hugs!!
I'm so sorry.... I feel so bad for you!

[RobiLee]

My heart just breaks for you Lorraine. What a difficult situation.

Great big hugs for you!!!!


{{{HUGS}}}.........Robin

[Jadapit]

I'm really sorry that it didn't work out Lorraine! I know how much you wanted it to and you can tell how much you loved Ajay. I agree with the others he will be better off in a home without other dogs. I believe you did the right thing and you should NOT feel guilty.

We had a friend that had cancer and he had no chance of living so he never got to come home. Anyway, he had a dog and her name is Bear. He loved that dog more that life. He was in a hospital quite a few miles from where we live and his brother was driving back and forth everyday and it was hard on him so he asked if we could keep Bear for a week so he could just stay with his brother at the hospital. I said of course. Bear is a female chow pit mix and my dog Jada hated Bear. She went after her all the time so I know the stress you were going through. I had to keep Bear and Jada apart and I was a nervous wreck over the whole thing. So I know what you were going through and it's not any fun. I hope you are feeling better about everything.

[LorraineO]

Welllll.. I was doing okay today until I came across Ajays adoption papers on the computer desk,,,, off into the tears I went again........... sigh,,, I have used WAYYY too many kleenex these past few days!!!:( thank you for thinking of me and all the wonderful sentiments,,, I so appreciate them!!!!