Is it ok to celebrate Thanksgiving when....

[teenster3]

Is it ok to "celebrate Thanksgiving" when my brother-in-law is in jail? (for 3rd DUI)
He'll only be in until Christmas but I still feel bad for his 12 yr old daughter & 10 yr old son, to have to spend Thanksgiving without DAD there!
My husband says there are STILL things to be thankful for but it just feels weird!
My father-in-law & brother-in-law have been the only ones to REALLY accept me into the family since I met Matthew 8 years ago. So, even though my b.i.l. can get on my nerves, he's still a great guy at heart & I don't want family talking down on him when he's not there to defend himself, especially in front of the kids!
TiNa
:confused:

[shais_mom]

I think it is a great idea - it would probably bother the kids more if you don't celebrate.
And if the family starts to talk down on him - just say 'everyone has their faults' or 'think of the children' along those lines. If they love him and his kids I wouldn't think they would be badmouthing him in front of the kids.
Just MHO - but I wear rose colored glasses 99.99% of the time so I might not be the best advice giver!!!

[Samantha Puppy]

The kids are probably already feeling poorly about their dad being in prison. To take Thanksgiving away from them would only make them feel worse. In addition to that, they're at a time in their lives when they're really starting to change - interests, sometimes personalities, etc. - and again, changing up holiday traditions isn't the best idea.

IMO.

[mina'smomma]

It would be a wonderful thing to do. Just tell the adults that your bil is not to be spoken bad of in front of the children. With their dad in jail those kids will probably welcome the festivities. Besides I'm sure your BIL will want you to do that for his little ones.

[catnapper]

I think having a Thanksgiving meal would be a perfect thing to do. The kids will have some normalcy in a time when their world is upside down.

[Tonya]

I agree with everyone else. The kids need as much stability as possible. Be sure no one talks badly about your brother in law and enjoy the day. It's important for the kids. I am sorry to hear that he is in jail, but the truth is that you cannot put your lives on hold for him. You just have to keep moving on and he can catch up with you all when he gets out.

[NoahsMommy]

His kids are already being punished for what he's done. I think making anything special for them will only be a positive experience.

If it were me, I'd most definitely have them over to celebrate other things to be thankful for.

You're a good aunt for caring.

:)

[ramanth]

I think it would be very much okay to celebrate Thanksgiving. I'm sure many families have their own black sheep. I have a whole flock! ;) :D

Like you said, I'm sure there are many other things to be thankful for. Your own lives above all.

I know I have something extra special to be thankful for this year. (If he ever gets released from the hospital... ;) :D )

[Miranda_Rae]

I agree, I think you should have Thanksgiving. It would make them feel as if things are more "normal". My aunt is kind of in the same situation. My uncle is in Detox for a month so their kids (6 and 3) are going to be celebrating Thanksgiving without him. :( Its good for him though. He REALLY needs it. In the end (if he works hard and decides to stop drinking) it will be better for them, and they will get their REAL daddy back, not some drunk with no patience. :) So yeah, go for it! :D

[guineapiglover4life]

I think you should still celebrate Thanksgiving. If I didn't have my dad for Thanksgiving I would be terribly sad! If they talk down on him, just say, 'Everybody makes mistakes!'. Happy Thanksgiving! -Love Lexie and piggie Milli. :)

[teenster3]

I guess you're all right!
I shouldn't take it away because their dad did something "wrong". I do love my niece & nephew very much & wouldn't want them to miss out on anything. I guess I just didn't know how they would feel not having their dad there. He is sulking in jail but only has to spend a few months there. I guess he should count his lucky stars that he didn't have to spend any more time than necessary!
I truly can make the statement: "Everyone makes mistakes".....thanks for listening!
Tina:)