I have to rehome Ron and Raven...

[Tonya]

I feel so devastated right now that it is hard for me to type this.

As most of you know, my son is allergic to cats and has bad asthma. We found this out two years ago and the doctor advised me to get rid of the animals. Of course, I asked her if there was anything else that I could do before rehoming them. So, we've got hepafilters set up through the house, kept the cats out of his room, etc...He's been taking 2 inhalers and three pills a day plus an allergy shot in each arm weekly for the past two years.

He still cannot breathe. He cries to me that he's sad because he can't run with his friends and he has a tough time in soccer. The kids tease him because he's always coughing and he can't keep up.

I layed in bed last night in tears, listening to him cough all night long. I saw the respritory therapist again today, and she wants to put him back on prednisone. This is the third time he's been on it this month. As some of you know, prednisone is a dangerous drug. On top of that, she added a third inhaler and one more pill to his daily regimine. She's also upped his breathing machine treatments to 4-6 times a day. I broke into tears in the office today, telling her that my heart hurts for my son. I am so tired of him being sick all the time.

Once again, she told me I have to get rid of the cats. She doesn't think it will solve everything, but that it will relieve a great deal of his problems. When they did the allergy test, that was the biggest allergy that he had.

My heart aches so bad. On one hand, I feel like such a horrible horrible mother for letting my son suffer so that I can have my animals. On the other hand, I hurt so bad for Ron and Raven. I love them so much. I can't imagine them anywhere else but here. To top it all off, Jaden won't stop crying. He is so upset about rehoming them. He understands that it has to be done though.

I have to do this for Jaden. I am praying that someone from Pet Talk will take them. I really want them to stay in the PT family. I know all of you so well and I trust all of you. I know that each and every one of you are good and responsible pet owners. And more for Jaden then myself, I know that I would get pictures and updates.

They need to be inside only cats. I am not sure if they have to stay together. They never really liked eachother much, so I think they'd be ok apart. The only thing that I am thinking is that maybe if they get rehomed together they will be a little less confused. I am willing to transport anywhere.

I have to go out of town tomorrow morning for my grandfather's funeral. I will not be back until Monday, but I will try to check this.

Please help me. This hurts so bad. I haven't hurt like this in a long time. I can't even look at them. I feel so horrible.

[Miranda_Rae]

Oh, I am SOOOO sorry. :( I would be devastated also...All I can say is I believe you are doing the right thing...you don't want your son to be miserable, but it would be so hard. :( :( {{{HUGS}}}

[kimlovescats]

Oh Tonya, I feel so sad for you and your son both. I completely understand your decision, and in light of your son's health, I really feel it is in his best interest. I know you feel like a bad cat meowmmy ... but please don't .... you are a human mommy first! I know everyone here at PT will stand behind you on this, and will understand that you have tried longer than you probably needed to, to keep your furbabies. Your son needs to be healthy, and that is the bottom line here. You know I would help any way I can, but I'm sure you feel Tennessee is a bit far to commute from California!;) Surely, someone here on PT can help out somehow! Please try not to feel guilty, and keep your faith!

(((HUGS)))
Kim:)

[rg_girlca]

Oh Tonya, I can only imagine how you must feel right now.
Of course your sons health comes first.
I hope and pray that someone from PT will be able to take Ron or Raven or both for that matter so that it will make the parting a little easier for you.
My heart goes out to you. (((((HUGS)))))

[Tonya]

Thank you. I will wait until everyone reads this. It'd be beautiful if I found them a PT home in California. But if I do not, any where in the US is fine to me. It is really important to me that they get a good home. The only thing that will help me is if they stay in a PT home. Money isn't an issue for me. I will take them anywhere.

[GoldenRetrLuver]

Oh Tonya, I'm so sorry... {{hugs}} It must be very devastating for you and Jaden.

I'm sorry we can't take them in, as we're pretty much at our animal limit right now. :( I really, really hope someone can take them in, and provide a good home for both of them.. I'll be thinking of both of you, and Ron and Raven.

[kt_luvs_kitties]

That you have to rehome Ron and Raven. Your poor son, how he must feel also. :( Please DO NOT feel guilty, as others have said, you are doing what you must, and Jadan comes FIRST. Although I can not have anymore pets, if you need anything else, just feel free to ask. I will do what I can to help you. I am so sorry again. :(

[catnapper]

Oh Tonya, I am so sorry! {{{HUGS}}} I know this has been tugging at your heart for a long while. Please know that nobody will think you are a bad cat mom for doing this. You tried everything you could, and that is all we can do in a siruation like this.

[LKPike]

How terrible :( Maybe before just giving them up you could try taking them to a "animal hotel" for like a week to see if it really does help your son. if not... my mom told me couple days ago I could have a cat if I'm permanently hired at my new job. I'd love to help ya but I wont have a clear answer until next week or at latest next month :(

also, I think I remember a tv show talking about hairless cats for those with allergys - worth a try??

[Tonya]

Originally posted by LKPike
How terrible :( Maybe before just giving them up you could try taking them to a "animal hotel" for like a week to see if it really does help your son. if not... my mom told me couple days ago I could have a cat if I'm permanently hired at my new job. I'd love to help ya but I wont have a clear answer until next week or at latest next month :(

also, I think I remember a tv show talking about hairless cats for those with allergys - worth a try??

When we first found out about my son's allergies, I sent him to my parents (who are cat free) for a week. The cats are a causing factor to his symptoms. I can't beat around the bush anymore. I just have to accept it and do what I have to do.

[Craftlady]

Sorry to read this about the furry kids. You need to do what is in best interest of your sons health. The dogs dont bother him?

[Laura's Babies]

First concern is your son. I have to ask, is there anyone you are close to close by that could take them so you and your son could see them (from a distance, of coarse).. Maybe if they could be out of the house but not out of your lives????

[Tonya]

Originally posted by Craftlady
Sorry to read this about the furry kids. You need to do what is in best interest of your sons health. The dogs dont bother him?

He is also allergic to dogs. According to the test, the allergy is only slight though. He doesn't cough, get short of breath, or itchy when he is around the dogs like he does the cats. I'd originally made my dogs outside only after his allergy test. But over time, I realized he didn't have a reaction to them, so I allowed them back in. They aren't allowed in his bedroom or on the furniture and they're really good at obeying that rule.

[Tonya]

Originally posted by Laura's Babies
First concern is your son. I have to ask, is there anyone you are close to close by that could take them so you and your son could see them (from a distance, of coarse).. Maybe if they could be out of the house but not out of your lives????

That would be ideal. Unfortunatly, my mom and my dad are allergic to cats. One brother loves cats but he has waaaay to many animals and a baby on the way. I have a friend who said he'd take them, but he moves all the time. He's had 6-7 homes in the past two years. Right now, he's living with his parents. I'm afraid that the cats would wind up getting rehomed again since his life isn't stable. No one else that I know really likes cats.

[BCBlondie]

Tonya, I PM'ed you...

[Corinna]

Hey Richard doesn't Eddie need a couple of sibs.

[Tonya]

Thank you. I responded. I'm also going to put their description in here because that was painful to type. It's hard to rehome them when you don't want to talk about them. I keep telling myself that this means no more cat fur or litter boxes to clean, but it's not working.

Both Ron and Raven are good with kids. Ron is more tolerant and outgoing. A yapping dog, screaming child, busy house, etc...doesn't bother him. He's really social. He LOVES food. He begs for food all the time. He's the black and white one and he's probably about 5 or 6 years old. Raven, she's about 3 or 4 years old. She's not as social although she'll occasionally fall in love with a visitor. She'll normally hide when company comes over or the big dogs come inside. She does clean and play with our pomeranian, Sarah though. She's super affectionate. She loves men especially. She spends hours grooming my husbands. She didn't like my son for the longest time, she'd always run from him. Just recently, she started warming up to him. She's just started climbing on his chest and letting him pet her. They are both declawed.

*edit* Haha, I at least made myself laugh. I am not going to edit it because I need a laugh...I put "She spends hours grooming my husbands. " Yeah, all 10 of them. ;)

[Tonya]

Originally posted by Corinna
Hey Richard doesn't Eddie need a couple of sibs.

I'd drive there in a heartbeat! In fact, I'm leaving for there tomorrow morning. But I'll go twice!

[BCBlondie]

Originally posted by Tonya
*edit* Haha, I at least made myself laugh. I am not going to edit it because I need a laugh...I put "She spends hours grooming my husbands. " Yeah, all 10 of them. ;)
Haha, yeah I was wondering about that! But then I thought it was just a typo... :p

I replied to you, btw...

[shais_mom]

I really can't help but you and Jaden will be in my thoughts....

[jenluckenbach]

What a horrendous dilemma! :(:( I am SO sorry.

[lynnestankard]

Tonya - you're doing what you have to do as a caring, loving Mummy. We had similair problems with our youngest when she was little re: asthma and Cats.
I just hope someone comes to your aid and provides a loving home for Raven and Ronxxxx
Lots of Luck across the miles.

Love Lynne xx

[Tonya]

Thank you, everyone. I didn't sleep much last night. I keep trying to talk myself out of this...thinking maybe Jaden's breathing maching or new inhaler will make things better...But deep down, I know the truth is, Jaden should not have to take so many meds just so I can have cats. It hurts so much though. Jaden cried himself to sleep last night. He is begging me not to give them away.

[Tonya]

So far, I've gotten a response from BCBlondie. She may be able to take one of them. Is there anyone out there that can take the other or the two together?

[Tonya]

Can those of you that belong to other sites please cross post Ron and Raven's story? I would appreciate it. For people that I do not know, I will not transport out of California. (Unless I get very desperate and they have tons of references.) I am only willing to transport out of California to my PT friends.

[catcrazylady]

Tonya my heart is breaking for you. What a horrible thing to have to experience. You have to take care of your son. His health has to come first. It's not like you are dumping Ron and Raven. You are doing your very best to find them a good home.
I would take them in a minute if there weren't too many bodies in my house already. I'm afraid trying to integrate two full grown cats into an already overloaded home would not make anybody happy, especially Ron and Raven.
I'm so sorry for you and I will keep praying that some wonderful PTer will be able to take these wonderful kitties into their home.

{{{HUGS}}} to you for all the pain this is causing.

[sasvermont]

Toyna, is there a way to keep them totally apart from your son? Maybe a porch that has a summer / winter set up? That way everyone could win. The cats could enjoy the semi-outdoors....learn to sleep by themselves...be safe....be near you. Now folks, don't get all up in arms, thinking I am suggesting banishing the poor cats to a lockdown. My porch is pretty darn nice and I spend lots of time out there in the nice weather. Just a thought. I don't know if the weather in California is too extreme, but it cannot be much more than Vermont! It would also mean that your son could not go out on the porch.....or spend time with the cats...and that could be a problem.

I am sure someone here can help you out!

SAS

[mina'smomma]

I pm'd you Tonya.

I may be able to take one of them if you would be able to bring them to MI. They would only be an indoor cat. I've also e-mailed your thread to two of my closest friends who are major cat lovers. (they are helping me with my kitten when I start getting parinoid.)

[catmandu]

We are so sorry,and we hope,that you can rehome Ron,and Raven,without too much trouble!

[popcornbird]

Tonya, if my parents were okay with it, I would take them in a heartbeat. I have kitty fever right now and want one so bad!! Unfortunately, I don't think they'd agree to have cats at this point. Personally, I would love to have a cat more than anything, but it just isn't possible right now. With two birds who have the run of the whole house, I don't think it would be fair to them either. :(

My heart breaks for you, and I know this is probably one of the most difficult decisions you've ever had to make. I hope someone on PT will take them. We have a LOT of California Cat lovers on PT. I wish you the best of luck in rehoming them, and hope you can get them to a PT'er. I know its not easy, but you have to do what's best for your child.



Originally posted by sasvermont
Toyna, is there a way to keep them totally apart from your son? Maybe a porch that has a summer / winter set up? That way everyone could win. The cats could enjoy the semi-outdoors....learn to sleep by themselves...be safe....be near you. Now folks, don't get all up in arms, thinking I am suggesting banishing the poor cats to a lockdown. My porch is pretty darn nice and I spend lots of time out there in the nice weather. Just a thought. I don't know if the weather in California is too extreme, but it cannot be much more than Vermont! It would also mean that your son could not go out on the porch.....or spend time with the cats...and that could be a problem.

I am sure someone here can help you out!

SAS

I was thinking the same thing. Is it possible for you to build a sunroom type of thing outside for the cats to live in? The weather is very mild in CA, year-round, so I don't think it would be a problem weather-wise. That way, you could still have them, and you could keep them away from Jaden too. Do you think its a possibility?

[catnapper]

Just so everyone knows, if you have PMed Tonya and she is not responding, its because she is out of town at a funeral. I know this is very important and critical for her, so she will definately answer everyone once she gets back home. :)

(((HUGS))) to you Tonya.


~Kim

[Tonya]

Hi, everyone. I got homesick and came home a day early. I am to tired and distraught to really respond right now. I am sorry. I am really tempted on just trying harder to contain the cats to my bedroom and adding more hepafilters. I don't think I can do it. Even my husband is crying and he's normally a tough guy. We love them so much. You don't realize how much you love them until you face getting rid of them. :(

[Karen]

Rest, sweetie, sleep well, and know we are all thinking of you and ready to support whatever you decide.

[carole]

Tonya my heart goes out to you sweetie, I Can only imagine your dilemma and how much your heart is breaking at the thought of parting with your furbabies.

I think you have fought extremely hard to keep your cats, under the circumstances with Jaden's health and one can only commend you for trying so hard, everyone understands how awful this situation is for you,also there could be a small chance your new baby might have similar allergies, sorry not to be down and out about it all, but just facing what could happen.

I am certain there will be someone here on PT who will welcome Ron and Raven with open arms, its looking promising already, but maybe the porch idea is worth a try also.

HUGS to you and hopefully a positive outcome will eventuate and soon.

[BCBlondie]

:( I'm so sorry! I hope you can figure out a way to keep them. I know how much you must love them..

[catfamily]

Of worse comes to worse I might be able take them after Birdie and Tucker are off Clavamox and have a sick free cat home.My cats are with me day and night.I don't work,I'm 42 and don't care to travel at all.My whole life is cat sitting.I would never let them out.I don't have much company.We just built a new home in Maine to retire to next year,but the kicker is:Mike might say no.So hopefully you will find a better candidate.We already have 10 cats but after a few months of newnest,everyone is usually happy.My instinct is no more cats,but I understand your situation totally.
I really really think they'd be better in a home with none or 2-4 cats.It would be less stressfull to them
I just noticed they are declawed.It would be better to have them with less cats.I would think anyway.I don't know why I thought you were in Canada.Dummy me.:rolleyes:

[mina'smomma]

Get rest Tonya, and we are still praying that you can place them close to you.

[Equus217]

:(
How awful! I hope somone is able to take them, so they can stay in a PT home! I really would consider it but 3 dogs and twokitties is a full house for me right now. I don't think I could afford any more furkids. Gosh, my heart breaks for you though. I hope and pray an answer comes soon.

:(

[Tonya]

Thank you, everyone. I am still hoping to find someone that is in California.

[Tonya]

Something really cool happened right now. I had sent an email with Ron and Raven's story out to all the cat rescues in the area. Well, a woman emailed me back, she's the president of SASF...anyways, she said that they only take cats from the shelter but she felt inclinded to respond and she wanted to help me. So...I go to call her, and lo and behold, my husband answers the phone....it's his boss! I thought the number I was dialing was awfully familiar. It was his work number. I'm hoping this is a good sign...I just finished sending her pictures right now.

[carole]

Oh Tonya how freaky lol, but hey it has got to be a good omen for sure, fingers and paws crossed here, keep us updated please, good luck sweetie.;)

[Tonya]

Originally posted by carole
Oh Tonya how freaky lol, but hey it has got to be a good omen for sure, fingers and paws crossed here, keep us updated please, good luck sweetie.;)

I know. The funny thing is my husband has this tough guy front and he's been really upset...especially about Raven. Well, in my email, I'd even put how devastated my husband is. Oh, he'd kill me if he knew his boss found out he is an undercover softy.

[Christiansmommy]

Originally posted by Tonya
Something really cool happened right now. I had sent an email with Ron and Raven's story out to all the cat rescues in the area. Well, a woman emailed me back, she's the president of SASF...anyways, she said that they only take cats from the shelter but she felt inclinded to respond and she wanted to help me. So...I go to call her, and lo and behold, my husband answers the phone....it's his boss! I thought the number I was dialing was awfully familiar. It was his work number. I'm hoping this is a good sign...I just finished sending her pictures right now.

Wow, that certainly has got to make you feel good about everything. I have been keeping up with your thread, but havent posted until now.

Not sure if you knew, but i had to rehome my former cat, b/c he wasn't very "kid friendly", and i had a young child. An old time pettalker ( Spencer the Lion) heard about my situation and posted about it on Pettalk...i wasnt a member yet, but my mom (pam) was...so anyway, SASVERMONT and I just had this connnection and she ended up taking him for me, with the intentions of adopting him out, but he fit into her home, and became her kitty :) This was Gabe. Unfortunately he passed onto the rainbow bridge, but he had a great end to his life, living with Sallyanne, Miley and Graemer...so anyway, happy endings can come true...

The day I handed Gabe over to SAS, i was strong, but after he drove away, i kinda lost it...but i knew it was for the better...he had the best life he could have had with her...

So anyway, here is hoping this phone call is your happy ending to this very tough situtation...it seems to be a great step in the right direction!!

~Robyn

[catfamily]

OMG..what a small world.This would be ideal for your family.Maybe cat visits too.:D

[jazzcat]

Best of luck with that prospect Tonya.

[Tonya]

Well, she helped me to come up with half a solution. :D I feel better then I have in days. My son is currently going through allergy therapy. He gets two shots a week, they are low doses of what he is allergic to. They up it every so often and so it causes your body to create a natural immunity and you are eventually supposed to have little or no allergies. He is already about a year into this therapy. Also, on top of that, getting rid of the cats doesn't 100% guarantee that his breathing problems will go away since he's allergic to many things.

So, we are going to find a foster home for them for 3 months. After three months, maybe his immunity will be built up a little more. Also, we'll be able to tell by then if getting rid of the cats made a significant difference. It takes quite a while to get cat dander out of your house, but by then, we should know. So, in three months, we'll deal with the decision.

So...does anyone in California want to foster them for three months? I PROMISE that even if I can't keep the cats after three months, I won't dump them on you. I will take them back and immediatly turn them over to that woman to rehome them.

[jenluckenbach]

Sounds like a VERY good plan! Best of luck with it.

[dogs_4_me]

Good plan, hope everything works out.:)

[catfamily]

That is the best plan ever.I wish I lived near you.I hope someone is kind enough to come forward and help.It's nothing taking in 2 cats for 3 months.

[lynnestankard]

Great idea Tonya - and it gives you breathing space too.

Hope all goes well.

Lynne

[Tonya]

I'm having a heck of a time finding someone to foster them. No one that I know likes cats and/or is responsible enough for me to trust them with my cats. My brother is the only possibility but his wife is having a baby this week. I think it'll be to much for them, especially since they already have to many animals. If I don't find a foster, I'm not getting rid of them. I'm just going to keep them. I can't rehome them.

[catfamily]

Oh boy.That's a tough one for you.I'm so sorry for your troubles.You'll just have to find good doctors and meds for your son.Try to keep the cats in a seperate bedroom and make that their official home untill your son gets his allergys in place by the best meds possible for allergies.

[Cataholic]

Tonya,
I just saw this post, or would have responded last week. This sounds like the same situation my girlfriend was in with her oldest son, Matthew. Matthew is 3. My friend has 3 dogs and 5 cats, and Matthew developed allergies. He is on meds, the animals are kept out of his room, etc. The biggest help to her household? Get rid of ALL the carpets/drapes, etc. Now, she could afford to get hardwood floors. I know that is not very realistic for most of us. But, could you re-do Jaden's room?

Just a thought.....

[Tonya]

Originally posted by Cataholic
Tonya,
I just saw this post, or would have responded last week. This sounds like the same situation my girlfriend was in with her oldest son, Matthew. Matthew is 3. My friend has 3 dogs and 5 cats, and Matthew developed allergies. He is on meds, the animals are kept out of his room, etc. The biggest help to her household? Get rid of ALL the carpets/drapes, etc. Now, she could afford to get hardwood floors. I know that is not very realistic for most of us. But, could you re-do Jaden's room?

Just a thought.....

We do have much more hardwood and tile here then the old house, but I think it won't be enough to redo his room. We even have special covers on his bedding that I wash daily. And he has a hepafilter in his room. In fact, the hepafilter I got is so strong that I doubt there are even allergens in his room. It makes a clean circle mark on the carpet where it sits it is so strong.

[kohala]

Jen just PM'd me about this thread - I've been off lately. I am so glad you are going to tough it out. Jen had emailed me as she knew Grasshopper had gone over the rainbow bridge this June. Although I am just down here in San Diego, and definitely ready emotionally to move on, logisticaly the timing is bad. Being in the middle of a move soon it would be difficult to try and adopt or foster the kitties now.
You will be much in my thoughts and prayers. I love families like yours who understand the value of each member of the family (no matter which terran species you may be) and really try to work things out.
My best to you and your family - all of you!!:cool: :cool: :cool: