teenster3
10-12-2004, 04:46 PM
*"Warning, this is a long thread but I just needed to get it out, in advance....thank you!"
Today I had my parents over for lunch. My mom & I went out for a little bit & while we're in the car she says to me: "you're dad has a heart problem." AGH......:(
On top of everything that's been going WRONG lately......
So when we get back to my house, I went outside to sit on the deck with my dad. (my mom was inside)
We're just talking & out of nowhere he starts crying & says to me: "Honey, I love you & I really hope I've been a good dad!" Then begins to tell me that he has a heart problem. All I know is that he has a 50/50 chance. He goes into the hospital next Wed. to have testing done to see how bad the blockage is & see if they can just help it with medicine or to see if he'll need surgery. Life just stinks sometimes.
When it rains, it really does pour! I was really proud of myself....I held it together for him & said everything would be wonderful & what a GREAT, SUPER dad he's been so far! But, I have to say I'm a little ashamed of myself now......here I am on here talking about it with tears pouring down my face wondering.......will he really be alright & how can I EVER live without him?! I know sometime the day will come when I have to BUT NOT RIGHT NOW!!!!!! I can't possibly deal with anymore pain & others suffering. And then he precedes to tell me....."Honey, I'm sorry I was crying, I'm just feeling sorry for myself!" You have to know my dad but, he's the last person to have to say that. He's never felt sorry for himself, he's very caring & loves people & animals!!!! I JUST WISH that I could make him better! He's sick of all the treatments & drugs. THIS on top of his prostate cancer....what can I do or even say to make him feel better? I REALLY, REALLY wish people & our animals didn't have to ever get sick! I just don't know what to do anymore! I'm trying, really trying to stay strong & not be down. I'm trying to be there for my grandma, my dad, & stay healthy myself in order to have a baby. In order to give my dad & mom a grandchild that they won't have unless I can have 1 myself! Some days are really harder than others.:(
Tina
Today I had my parents over for lunch. My mom & I went out for a little bit & while we're in the car she says to me: "you're dad has a heart problem." AGH......:(
On top of everything that's been going WRONG lately......
So when we get back to my house, I went outside to sit on the deck with my dad. (my mom was inside)
We're just talking & out of nowhere he starts crying & says to me: "Honey, I love you & I really hope I've been a good dad!" Then begins to tell me that he has a heart problem. All I know is that he has a 50/50 chance. He goes into the hospital next Wed. to have testing done to see how bad the blockage is & see if they can just help it with medicine or to see if he'll need surgery. Life just stinks sometimes.
When it rains, it really does pour! I was really proud of myself....I held it together for him & said everything would be wonderful & what a GREAT, SUPER dad he's been so far! But, I have to say I'm a little ashamed of myself now......here I am on here talking about it with tears pouring down my face wondering.......will he really be alright & how can I EVER live without him?! I know sometime the day will come when I have to BUT NOT RIGHT NOW!!!!!! I can't possibly deal with anymore pain & others suffering. And then he precedes to tell me....."Honey, I'm sorry I was crying, I'm just feeling sorry for myself!" You have to know my dad but, he's the last person to have to say that. He's never felt sorry for himself, he's very caring & loves people & animals!!!! I JUST WISH that I could make him better! He's sick of all the treatments & drugs. THIS on top of his prostate cancer....what can I do or even say to make him feel better? I REALLY, REALLY wish people & our animals didn't have to ever get sick! I just don't know what to do anymore! I'm trying, really trying to stay strong & not be down. I'm trying to be there for my grandma, my dad, & stay healthy myself in order to have a baby. In order to give my dad & mom a grandchild that they won't have unless I can have 1 myself! Some days are really harder than others.:(
Tina