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View Full Version : rather blue tonight, but I'll get over it, random thoughts



lbaker
09-03-2004, 06:05 PM
Today would have been my husbands 58th birthday
I miss him terribly - I miss him beautifully
I miss the way he would tell me every night, as
we went to sleep, how much he loved me
..and every morning how beautiful I was.
I mostly miss how his eyes would shine when
he looked at me.
I wonder, will I ever make anyone's eyes shine like that again?
I think not, but that's OK
I had it once
I'm lucky to have had it at all

I think you are the only people I can tell this to. I am blessed to have you as my friends.
Laurie

..and yes, my dogs and cats look at me with wonder and love, and that - believe me - makes me able to wake in the mornin

tatsxxx11
09-03-2004, 06:44 PM
Oh Laurie:(:(:( My chest got tight and eyes welled up when I read your loving words. And I could hear the great sadness in your heart. What a wonderful man your husband was. He truly loved and cherished his beautiful lady Laurie. I can only imagine the heartbreak of such a loss:( How lucky you two were to have known such love and friendship. We're here for you Laurie. And yes, I have no doubt that you will one day find that special someone, in whose eyes you will see that sparkle and love. Thinking of you friend. Love Sandra{{{HUGS}}}

Cookiebaker
09-03-2004, 06:53 PM
What a great relationship you had with your husband, Laurie....and what a beautiful tribute to him. My heart aches for you while I was reading that.

Thank you for the reminder to not take life for granted!

{{Hugs}} to you!

wolflady
09-03-2004, 07:03 PM
Bless your heart Laurie. I too got emotional reading your post. What a wonderful relationship you and your husband had! I can imagine that I would feel the same way you do in that case. I agree with cookiebear, that this is a great reminder for me not to take life (or the people in my life) for granted. I am really blessed with what I have, and you are too:) Please know that we are all here for you and it's a wonderful thing to have you all as friends! :D I look forward to meeting up with you again sometime Laurie! You're so much fun! ;)

**hugs**
Karen

Christiansmommy
09-03-2004, 07:08 PM
Laurie, that was beautiful. Your husband was just as lucky a man, to have a sweet lady like you! What sweet memories to hold dear forever. Glad you have the pups to keep you company today...i am sure they are treating you extra sweet today, since they can sense sadness. Your husband sure did sound like one in a million, not many women these days can speak so kindly of their husbands, sadly.

(((HUGS))) to you, hope your blues fade and your happy memories remain vivid and real :) (((HUGS))) again :)

Robyn

RobiLee
09-03-2004, 07:12 PM
Laurie,

Like Sandra my eyes have filled with tears. I can't even imagine this feeling that you are going through. It scares me to even think about it.

Such beautiful words you wrote. What a fantastic love you and your husband shared. Yes, you are very lucky to have found that. It sounds like you have a lot of love in your heart and therefore I believe that it is possible to make someones eyes shine for you again.

Oh geesh, I just wish I could give you a hug in person or just sit with you and hear your stories about your husband and hold your hand while you talk. My heart feels your pain this evening. I will be thinking about you lots tonite. Please pm me if you feel like talking or sharing a story. I can be a great listener ;)

We all care, Laurie and I'm glad you wrote to let us know how you are feeling on this difficult day.

{{{HUGS}}}.......Robin :)

dukedogsmom
09-03-2004, 07:16 PM
I know you must feel really sad today, missing him alot. Please, consider yourself very lucky to have had such a special love. Some of us don't even know what it's like. Remember all the special times and I'm sure he's still with you. Also remember that you will meet again.

Logan
09-03-2004, 10:09 PM
The two of you were very lucky to share that kind of love, Laurie. :) You are in my thoughts today.

Logan

lbaker
09-03-2004, 10:09 PM
If I could I would write to each one of you separately right now but it's hard to type with tears in my eyes. But these tears are not of loneliness, but of gratitude. I finally found other friends and they - YOU - are right here.
Funny thing, each time I start crying now and blow my nose I have my babes waiting to take the snotty tissues out of my hand :rolleyes: What is it about snotty tissues? I will sleep easily tonight and I thank you all. Val, you OK with situation with Frances? I'm worried about all my FL friends. SEE, I guess it's a matter of trying to remember the really important things.. love, friends, caring and all that good stuff. Thanks again you all. You matter dearly

slick
09-03-2004, 10:13 PM
We love you Laurie. Sleep well my friend; we will be here in the morning.

Signed
Cuzin ITT

dukedogsmom
09-03-2004, 10:19 PM
It's ok so far but it's not supposed to hit until late tomorrow night. I hope I don't miss another episode of Big Brother :p Charley made me miss that one Saturday. I'll be on here tomorrow night if it's not too bad. I'll just be glad when it's over with. I can't take the stress. Hope you do sleep well tonight.

Soledad
09-03-2004, 10:20 PM
lbaker - Thank you for making me appreciate how lucky I am to have my Sam even when he pisses me off by working until 10.30pm on a Friday night.:p :rolleyes:

I don't know if you'll find someone like your husband again, but I do know that you had someone that loved you, held you, cherished you and respected you. And you loved them with everything you had right back. That's what life's all about and you had it! You got to have that beautiful experience that so many people dream of and never get. Even if your time together was cut short, you both were blessed to have each other and he'll always live on in you.

I'm thinking of you.

Karen
09-03-2004, 10:39 PM
Laurie, you know we love you. Hug yourself tight from all of us until we see you in person again.

Hey, I'm sure all the 4-pawed ones appreciate lotsa snotty kleenexes! It's their very weirdness that keep us going sometimes, isn't it? And you give that Badger a big ol' tummy rub for me, 'cause I know he's a sucker for 'em.

A love so grand, so great, so strong
That it lives longer than the person who gave it
Is a rare and precious gift

People long for it
Write songs about it
Advertise in desperately abbreviated need for it
Dream of it
And want it more than sleep, more than money.
More than anything

How bittersweet that you have loved such a love
And having lived on, must remember
But remember laughter, too
And smile in your heart
Because you, dear one
Loved such a love as dreamers dream of.

davidpizzica
09-03-2004, 10:53 PM
Originally posted by lbaker
Today would have been my husbands 58th birthday
I miss him terribly - I miss him beautifully
I miss the way he would tell me every night, as
we went to sleep, how much he loved me
..and every morning how beautiful I was.
I mostly miss how his eyes would shine when
he looked at me.
I wonder, will I ever make anyone's eyes shine like that again?
I think not, but that's OK
I had it once
I'm lucky to have had it at all

I think you are the only people I can tell this to. I am blessed to have you as my friends.
Laurie

..and yes, my dogs and cats look at me with wonder and love, and that - believe me - makes me able to wake in the mornin Laurie, if you want to talk PM me, you were there for me in the hospital, I want to be here for you now. I have a soft shoulder to cry on!

lbaker
09-03-2004, 11:08 PM
Karen, I will dream a dream that makes the morning easy if I can. Thank you my very special friend. You know, sometimes I actually hear him talking to me at night. Really, I hear his words.. sometimes it's like he's saying "oh, get over it" if something is making me crazy. (he wasn't a shy sort of guy). Thanks David, I just may do that. I feel I will be up for awhile this night. I wonder if there are any good ol' John Wayne Westerns on. Oh dear, Baker (my hubby) and I used to love to watch old John Wayne westerns. Badger sends his love Karen, to you and Paul and Pam's Charlie... and Ripley. Badger was Baker's main man you know. Oh dear, I guess I'm rambling...:(

davidpizzica
09-03-2004, 11:16 PM
If anyone deserves to ramble, it's you, Laurie!! Hang in there, young lady!

Jods
09-03-2004, 11:25 PM
Ramble all you want... I'm new and I don't know you or your situation but, I can sort of piece things together and I'm sorry for whatever happened. Hope your feeling a bit better. I know thats hard, but look into the eyes of your pets like you said, they will keep you going I know mine would. :)

lovemyshiba
09-03-2004, 11:25 PM
Your post made me cry, Laurie.

My mother in law went through the same thing, losing her husband at a young age. I know how special he was to her, just from seeing the look in her eyes when she talks about him.

You also made me stop and really think for a minute--life is not to be taken for granted!! I may be annoyed when my husband is out late with his band, or we don't see each other for a few days because our schedules conflict, but I am thankful for what I have.

I'll be thinking of you Laurie.

trayi52
09-03-2004, 11:34 PM
Sorry Laurie, you are feeling so blue. Remember you are such a special lady, and we all love you dearly. You are always so much fun!! I can see why your husband loved you so much. He was a very lucky man, and sounds like you was a lucky woman. The fact is, you were both very lucky to have found each other and experienced a relationship so special. Not many can find that kind of special love.

May you sleep well tonight, my dear and sweet friend, and have very sweet dreams.

Willie:)

slick
09-03-2004, 11:39 PM
Laurie:
Use David's shoulder. It's a real comfort. Trust me, I know. ;)

lbaker
09-03-2004, 11:44 PM
and again I thank you, but Willie.. don't let Mario read this, you know how emotional he can get and I don't want that little dear to cry in his beer. * see, now I'm getting crazed again, help me Rhonda... help,help me Rhonda......"

slick
09-04-2004, 12:08 AM
Laurie:
I'm only a plane ticket away!!!! ;) :D Let's enjoy the ride!

gini
09-04-2004, 12:42 AM
Dear Laurie,

This is so strange because I just came home and logged on to Pet Talk.

What is strange about it is that I just saw the movie The Notebook. In it, the woman has the greatest love a woman could ever want.............but.............she cannot remember any of it.

And now I am reading your tribute to Baker...........and you do remember.........every sweet touch, caring word, special glint in his eye and the way he always knew how to handle you - deal with you on all levels. And how much he loved you.

I am glad that you can remember every last bit of your life with Baker. Yes, it causes you pain because he doesn't seem as though he is at your side............but I believe he is................he is!

Love, Gini

Ally Cat's Mommy
09-04-2004, 02:06 AM
Laurie,

What a difficult day for you:( I am so glad you are here - amongst friends who care for you, and want to give you support. Thankyou for reminding me to cherish the people in my life, even if they do sometimes drive me crazy. (I REALLY needed this reminder today - so even in your grief, and even though you may not have realised, you have helped ME very much today)

Reach out to us, and to the furkids. And remember that we are here for you!


(((HUGS)))

This poem helps me - I am sure you have read it before, but I wanted to post it here.


DEATH is nothing at all.
I have only slipped away to the next room.
I am me and you are you, whatever we were to each
other we are that still.

Call me by my old familiar name.
Speak to me in the easy way, which you always used.
Put no difference into your tone.
Wear no forced air of solemnity or sorrow.
Laugh as we always laughed at the little jokes we enjoyed together.

Play, smile, think of me, and pray for me.
Let my name be ever a household word that it always was.
Let it be spoken without effort, without the ghost of a shadow in it.
Life means more than it ever meant. It is the same as it ever was.
There is absolute unbroken continuity...

Why should I be out of your mind because I am out of your sight?
I am but waiting for you, for an interval somewhere,
very near, just around the corner.

All is well.

Henry Scott Holland 1847-1918

Miss Meow
09-04-2004, 03:19 AM
Laurie, it's a beautiful tribute.

Thank you for reminding us all that life can be fleeting and we should be eternally grateful for the wonderful people in our lives.

{{{big hugs}}}

4 Dog Mother
09-04-2004, 03:23 AM
I read your tribute to your husband earlier this evening. I was just ready to snap at Carl about something and there your thread was staring me in the face - making me realize how much I take for granted. What you wrote was beautiful and it is exactly how I would feel if something happened to Carl - could or would anyone see me, love me as he did. The sad part is Carl is living in Florida due to our job situation and I am still in Findlay Ohio. We see each other every couple of months and here I am snapping at him when he has been home less than 24 hours. Thanks for the reminder to not take my dear husband for granted. I hope you get a good night's rest - I will be thinking of you adn praying for you.

jenluckenbach
09-04-2004, 04:44 AM
{{{Laurie}}}}
sweet memories are the next best thing to the real thing. hold on to him dear, you will see him again. and in the meantime, he is right there with you, through everything you do, in spirit.

Pam
09-04-2004, 07:13 AM
Laurie my daughter sent me an e-mail to look at this thread. She was so touched by your tribute to your hubby and so am I. So many here have said what I feel, that not too many people these days can appreciate your words as so many marriages do not even last, let alone rise to the bond that you and Baker had. My dad has been gone 23 years and my mom still kisses his photo which is by her bed in the convalescent center.

It hurts especially on these special days I know, but thankfully we have our pets to cry on at these times since they, like no other human being, love us with the same unconditional love you had with Baker. Hug them now Laurie and feel free to cry on their fur. That is one of the reasons they are here, I believe, to help us humans over the rough spots and we, in return, love them back just as fiercely. Please give Badger an extra special hug from his Auntie Pam and his tiny little friend, Ripley. (((Hugs)))

anna_66
09-04-2004, 07:43 AM
Laurie, I know this is coming a little late but I read your post last night and and I didn't even know what to say...and really still don't this morning either:o

I'm just glad that you had such a wonderful love in your life. Not too many people these days do, but fortunately I am one of them and could not imagine my life without my husband. I don't know how many years you were married, but they must have been the most wonderful years of your life. Treasure your memories. They are the one thing you can hold on to forever.

Anna

KYS
09-04-2004, 07:53 AM
I can only imagine the pain and sadness of loosing your partner and BEST friend in the world.
Love is for enternity!
Hugs Karen (((^..^)))

Killearn Kitties
09-04-2004, 02:56 PM
I hope you don't mind me sending you loads of hugs, I know that I don't know you well, but I have been thinking about you all day. Your tribute was beautiful and I was so upset that I just didn't know what to say. Anniversary dates are the hardest aren't they. I hope today has been a little easier for you and you have some consolation in knowing how much we all care about you.

Purrs and hugs
from all of us.

RobiLee
09-04-2004, 05:18 PM
Hi Laurie,

Just checking in to see how you are today? I hope you got a good nights sleep. We are here for you.

Robin