My life is just so awful right now!

[stacwase]

I just need to rant. A little support wouldn't hurt either. This is just awful. Awful, awful, awful.

There's soooo much going on, and I'm so stressed that I am not capable of dealing with any of it!

First of all, my husband left for Iraq yesterday. He's going to be gone for a year - and he went voluntarily. I'm way out here in the boondocks, all alone with 2 kids and 4 dogs. The nearest paved road is 1.4 miles from here, and it's a county road. They highway is about 6 miles away but it takes half an hour to get to a grocery store. It's what I always wanted, but it's hard right now because we're not even moved in yet and there's nobody I can call for help or anything.

My husband got all the heavy stuff moved but I have tons of stuff out in the garage that has to be put away, and I just can't find anything! My dryer broke.

The old house still needs to be fixed up to sell.

And these dogs. Good grief. I have my mom's 2 chihuahuas because she's very ill. I had them completely housebroken, but they just decided not to be housebroken anymore and they're having accidents everywhere.

I have my stepdaughter's dog because she's in Mexico on her delayed honeymoon.

And of course I have Max.

No matter what I do I can NOT keep these dogs contained. I do everything in my power to keep them from running off, but then somebody always goes and screws it up!!! My daughter brought her friends over and one of them accidentally let them loose, and my son accidentally let them loose. It seems the dogs conspire to find ways to distract people so they can get loose.

I keep telling the kids that one of the dogs has to be restrained at all times. If only one of them is loose, they stay right in the yard but if they both get loose, they run off and stay gone for hours.

I had to take both dogs to the emergency vet in the middle of the night to have porcupine quills removed. Max was extremely difficult for them to sedate, and it took forever. I left at like midnight and got home at 5:00 am and only got to sleep for like 2-3 hours. Then not even 24 hours later the dogs were loose again. I'm praying we don't have another double midnight vet visit.

The vet is an hour from here. She missed a quill in Max's chin. Thank God my son and I were able to bribe him with treats and I got it out. It was in very deep and it took a lot of muscle to get it out.

And Kamble (Betsy's dog) barks nonstop. He's a really sweet dog but good grief. I'm sooooooooo stressed out right now!! I even considered bringing him somewhere to board him, but he doesn't have his borditella vaccine and I've spent enough on him at the vet.

Just give me some soft shoulders OK? I'm too upset to even cry. This is just too much right now.

[Samantha Puppy]

Wow. I'm so sorry things are so crappy for you at the moment. You must feel like your husband abandoned you right when you needed him the most, but please try and realize he's trying to make a difference and do what he thinks is right.

You all are trying to get used to a new situation and while it's hard on you, it must be even more difficult for your pups because they don't understand why things are different. I know you'll stay the course and you'll all settle into your new life and new routine soon enough.

Just remember... this, too, shall pass. I promise things'll get better. If you ever need to vent or cry or shout or whatever, I'm just a PM away.

[micki76]

All that and you're even in a new home that probably doesn't even feel like home yet. I'm so sorry you're having to deal with all this alone, too. :(

At least one day you can look back and hopefully laugh at some of the "adventures" of late.

I hope your husband will stay safe. Is he military or over for a civilian job?

[Cinder & Smoke]

"First of all, my husband left for Iraq yesterday."

First:

Stay Safe, Hubby!

Second:

I assume Hubby is in the Military??

CALL his Unit's Headquarters - ask to talk to the Chaplain or
someone who "Assists" spouses...

Almost ALL Units have a group of Willing Volunteers who
can and do Help Out in situations like yours.

You're NOT alone - you just have to ask around to find some help.

/s/ Phred ..

[KYS]

When it rains it pours!
Sometimes I do not understand why does
life have so many up's and down.
(up's are ok, but a little less of the downs would be
so nice.)

May you husband and your family always be safe.

(((HUGS)))

[chocolatepuppy]

stacwase, I was just wondering about you today, haven't seen you on here. Yes sometimes everything seems wrong with your world,I'm in the same boat myself right now, that's why I've been on here all evening to forget about things.Sometimes it seems like things will never get better but they will. I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers and hope that little by little your life turns around. :)

[sirrahbed]

Oh MY!:( If it was not real and happening to you, it would almost be laughable to have so much going wrong!!

Is hubby military? If so, I have certainly been down THAT road for 27 years and wish I could offer a real live shoulder for you, some hot cocoa, listening ear and a nice soft shoulder to cry on!!

Things WILL get better. They always do. It does not seem like it at the time though:(

Please post again and tell us how things are going. When you read this in a few months, you will likely get a chuckle at all the things happening! You DO have a tremendous amount of things to handle but you CAN do it. Take care!! ((((HUGS))))

[Tonya]

I am so sorry to hear that things are hectic for you! I felt overwhelmed just reading about it. Just know that things will settle down soon. I will pray for your husband's safe return from Iraq and for your peace of mind. ((((hugs))))))

[slick]

You know if I could, I would jump on the first plane out there and give you hand. :( I can't even imagine how isolated you must feel right now, but thank God for the internet and Pet Talk. We are here to listen 24/7.

Phred is right, you really need to make some calls and don't be afraid to ask for some help.

Deb is right too, when you think about it, there's no where to go from here but UP.

Sending big {{{{{HUGS}}}}} to you and a soft shoulder to cry on when you need it.

Remember, we are never given more than we can handle.

[Logan]

As you can tell, Stacy, we're all here for you. What a burden you are carrying right now, but you're a strong woman and you will get through this!!!! Hang in there and lean on us if we can give you moral support, at least.

Logan

[Miss Meow]

What a stressful time for you to be managing all those things at once.

Seek the help you can get from the military and try to see things improving bit by bit each day. The dogs will start to settle, you'll hopefully get into a new routine without your husband and the house will be lived-in eventually. It's so stressful when it's all out of place, though.

{{{hugs}}}

[leslie]

good god! Too much! I agree with everyone, it will someday be calm again, use the military services for support (thats what they are there for) but one last thing, Max is awful cute and I'll bet he had lots of fun getting those painful quills stuck in him and then pulled out again! What a great place for dogs! My mom had a farm in Cadilac MI for a few years- wondering where you are?

[NoahsMommy]

I'm with Slick, I wish I could come help and give you a big hug.

I'll be thinking of you and hoping things get a little better soon.

Take care...

[Ally Cat's Mommy]

I'm sorry things are so rough for you at the moment. I pray that your hubby is safe, and that things get a bit easier on the home front too.

(((HUGS))) to you

[dukedogsmom]

Stacy, I am so sorry to hear how bad things are. I thought they were looking up for you. I can't believe your husband voluntarily left. I do not blame you at all for being upset over that. You've got enough to deal with without that. Do you have any neighbors at all that you can talk to for help? What about some other mothers at your kids' school? If you want to pm me with your phone number, I would be more than happy to call you and try to cheer you up. Hope things get better.

[Pam]

I'm so sorry to hear about what is going on in your life right now. If I lived closer I would love to take one of the dogs off of your hands for a while and I know several other PTers would as well. There is a saying "when it rains it pours." In your case it sounds like a steady thunderstorm. (((gentle hugs))) to you from me as well. We are all here if you need to talk and please tell hubby how grateful we are for what he is doing in Iraq. Whether he is in the military or not he needs our prayers.

[Lillycat]

hang in there......see if some of the advice here will spell you for awhile.....give you some breathing room as it were....let us keep hearing from you .......like the others, wish we could be leaving on the next plane and help you for a bit......to settle in at least.....

[stacwase]

Thank you so much everybody! You just don't know how much your comments help right now. It helps me breathe a little easier, to know I'm not overreacting.

We don't have cable or DSL out here, so I can only get on the computer rarely right now. My husband is still in Washington DC and won't be in Iraq until tonight, so I like to keep the phone line open so he can call. Friday we'll have satellite internet yippee!

We survived another night with no quills. I found Kamble's bark collar and while it may seem cruel, his incessant barking just had to stop. Fortunately he knows what it is and stops barking the second it's put on. That way he doesn't get shocked.

My husband isn't in the military anymore. He's a retired Green Beret and he's now a physician assistant, and he speaks Persian/Farsi. He was hired by the government to go over there with a bunch of former special forces guys. I don't really know where he'll be yet.

As for neighbors - I can't believe I forgot to tell you!!! We do have some very close neighbors, because we bought this farm with a "life estate" on it. There's an elderly couple (in their 80s) in a mobile home on the land, and they get to stay there until they die. That's why we got such a great deal. Their names are Bethel and Edwin. Well - I brought Bethel to the hospital Friday and it looks pretty bad for her right now. I think she has advanced lung cancer. Her husband is blind and absolutely, positively will NOT leave that trailer. I wanted to bring him over here to take care of him, but he won't budge. I guess he gets confused at night and wanders. Right now the daughter-in-law is over there taking care of him, but I don't know what we'll do this winter. I sure don't want to find him frozen in the snow one morning.

Anyways. I'm going to get my 13-year-old up and drag him into town with me. I want to get some more work done on the old house and pick up some paint chips and decide how to do this kitchen.

Thanks again for all of your support. If I make it through today, then Kamble will be back home and one more stressor will be gone. Then I just have to get the chihuahuas re-trained. I think my mom is trying to avoid taking them back. I love them, but jeez. My life is so stressful right now, and dog poop on the floor is NOT helping. Plus the climate up here is baaaaaaaaaad. Winter comes in September and lasts until June, and one good blast of arctic air would freeze them in their tracks. I'm going to have to find fur coats and boots for them.

[mruffruff]

I really feel for you!

I grew up in the U.P. so I know how far the nearest store can be. And how soon winter comes.

I hope your neighbors don't become another burden. It doesn't sound good for Bethel. What will become of Edwin should she die first? If Edwin won't leave the trailer, who will care for him? You certainly don't need that responsibility too.

All you can do right now is to prioritize. If it doesn't desperately need to be done, let it go. Someone will get to it eventually.

Can you keep the chi's in a playpen to keep the "accidents" in one place? Thrift stores sell them cheap.

I wish I could be there to lend a hand. Don't despair....it'll be OK soon.

Mary

[lynnestankard]

Dear Stacy {{{Hugs}}} across the miles - my heart goes out to you - it all sounds so terrible.
At least getting Kambles anti-bark collar back on has solved one problem - don't barking dogs wear your nerves to a frazzle?
Maybe you just have to be bloody minded with your Mum and just tell her to take her poopy dogs home with her - their not your responsibility.
Good luck - hope things improve - vastly.

Lynne

[cloverfdx]

I hope things start to look up for you soon. We are all here if you want to talk. Takecare.

[pitc9]

I am so sorry to hear about everything going on.
I wish we all could have a HUGE PT meeting on your farm!
We'd all help out!

It kind of sounds like things are calming down.... kind of...

Please keep us posted and please remember that everyone here cares about and is thining about you!

Keep your chin up, and a smile on your face!
*~ HUGS ~*

[shais_mom]

I don't even know what to say. I am sure nothing I can say will help but I will say that I will be thinking of you, and keeping you in my prayers!
Do they escape crates also?

[robinh]

Wow, when I read your thread my first thought was where does she live and can I get there to help. It's too far to give physical support, but if you need to talk I know there are a number of people here that will definitely listen myself included. That's such a lot for one person to go through, please don't hesitate to come here for an ear.

[stacwase]

Thanks again for the support! You all are the greatest.

I re-started the chihuahua training. I have them crated all the time now, unless I'm watching them. Unfortunately I can't make my mom take them back. She can't even take care of herself and she's living with her sister right now. I promised to keep them at least until Thanksgiving.

As far as Max and Kamble escaping crates - Kamble didn't come with a crate, and Max's crate won't fit anywhere in this house! I'm sure we'll find a place for it once I get everything put away, but right now there isn't anywhere to put it.

They didn't escape yesterday, and haven't yet today - knock on wood! What I've been doing is keeping one of them chained if they're outside, and when they're inside I keep all of the doors and windows shut. Luckily, our front door opens into a mud room and our back door opens into the garage. The mud room and garage both have doors as well. I think I've finally got the kids convinced to keep the mud room and garage doors closed so that if the dogs do manage to get out one door while we're going out, then at least the second door is closed.

Now that I've got the kids trained, Betsy will be coming to take Kamble!

Just listen to me - "I, I, I" Do I sound self-centered or what?! Sorry. But I appreciate all the help.

[Kater]

I'm so sorry this is all happening at once! :( You and your family will definitely be in my prayers, Stacey. I hope things start getting better very soon! Keep us updated and know that we're always here to listen! {{{BIG HUG}}}

[stacwase]

Thanks, Kater.

I talked to my husband yesterday - he sounds like he's doing fine. I'm so glad that he's going to be able to email me every day.

I can't wait for Betsy to pick Kamble up. He's really a very smart dog, and if I had the time to spend with him I'm sure I'd really like him a lot. But he's constantly under foot, and he's extremely demanding. For example, when I separate the dogs to feed them, I put one in the garage, one in the kitchen, and the chis in the mudroom. Kamble is the first one to be scratching the door frantically to get back in. And he can't be outside for 5 minutes before he starts barking.

Max isn't like that. He'll patiently lay outside the door until we let him back in, and he rarely barks unless there's something to bark at.

Even the chihuahuas are more patient than Kamble.

And when I'm walking down the stairs he pushes me out of the way to get in front of me, then walks really slowly in front of me so I nearly trip over him.

Grrrrr.