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View Full Version : Just checking in for now..........



luckies4me
08-06-2004, 06:44 PM
Hey everyone. I am at a friends right now using their computer. I will most likely be going to Tigard tonight with Derek. Things did not go very well the other night when I broke things off with Dan. He was very angry. Luckily I called Derek and he was able to get his shift covered from another guy at work and was able to make it down here earlier than expected. He is now here with me.

I feel safe with him so that is good, though I can't tell you how much stress I have right now. I want to cry but for some reason I just cannot. It's strange. I just thought I would let you guys know how I am doing. I went to the house today with Derek to get some stuff for Dylan and I. The pets are fine. I am still unsure what exactly I am doing. I may go to Tigard, and I may stay, though I'd rather not. If I do go away I will have Dereks computer to use. I have a very hard decision to make right now. :( I miss all of you guys very much. Please pray for me. Pray that I am making the right decision for my son and for myself. I feel bad for Dan, though I shouldn't. I am sure many of you here that I talk to on AIM and have my LJ know some of the stuff that happens, especially you Kay. I know we have talked about this once before.

I actually don't even know what the heck I am typing right now. I just hope everyone here is well. Willie has my number if anyone needs to get ahold of me. You can also, agian, reach me at [email protected]

This has been really tough for me, and even harder for Dylan. As for Derek and I, I actually do not know what exactly is going to happen. I guess we are just taking it one day at a time. I am proud of myself that I actually did this. I can't believe it. I am terrified though. I always wonder how the heck I get myself into these situations. *sigh* Dan was very angry at me the other night, and I really thought he was going to hit me. The cops came, which settled things down. Derek was there so I felt a little bit safer, though I didn't want to make things worse by having anyone hurt. But what can I do right now? I really dont know. I am so confused. I am scared, frustrated, angry, and so so so so so so so sad. :(

Dan told me he was going to ask me to marry him. I know this is a way of him trying to make me stay. You know what he told me? He told me that he was going to ask me if I got rid of all the animals. Derek's family is a little uncertain too. We are crazy I told him. But............how do I know if this is the wrong decision unless I make it first? You know?

Well, HI everyone! I miss you all so very very much! I love you guys like family which is why I checked in, plus I said I was going to let everyone know how I was doing. I have some photos I took the past couple of days. I will try to post them. I am going to try to get my pets taken care of. I'll update more about that later, but for now, they are fine. :) Talk to you soon!!!!

Cass and Dylan

tatsxxx11
08-06-2004, 07:30 PM
You take care Cass. Be safe and take the time you need, away from the fray, to think things out. You're a bright lady and I know that in the end, you'll do what's best for you, Dylan and the critters. Check in when you can. We're thinking of you. {{{HUGS}}} Sandra

Kfamr
08-06-2004, 08:10 PM
Cass, do what you feel is best in your heart. I feel so bad for you and especially Dylan. It must be hard growing up in such a situation. I know you're doing your best for him, though, and I know you'll continue to do so.

Hugs to the both of you, and to all of the critters.

KYS
08-06-2004, 10:59 PM
Take care of yourself.
Sending good thoughts your way.

Hugs

Karen

Karen
08-06-2004, 11:19 PM
Here's hoping you find some moment of peace and stillness. It is tumultuous right now in your heart and head, I am sure, but it sounds like a move in the right direction for you. You just keep your head on tight, and reassure Dylan he's with you for always, and is safe, and that you're okay. Breathe!

Thank you for checking in.

anna_66
08-07-2004, 09:15 AM
Glad to hear you and Dylan are doing ok. I can't imagine what your going through right now.
Take care & thanks for letting us know how your doing.