for Ya'll from the South

[sirrahbed]

"Southernness" :D

Only a Southerner knows the difference between a hissy fit and a conniption fit, and that you don’t “HAVE” them, you “PITCH” them.

Only a Southerner knows how many fish, collard greens, turnip greens, peas, beans, etc., make up "a mess."

Only a Southerner can show or point out to you the general direction of “yonder.”

Only a Southerner knows exactly how long “directly” is -- as in: "Going to town, be back directly."

Even Southern babies know that "Gimme some sugar" is not a request for the white, granular sweet substance that sits in a pretty little bowl in the middle of the table.

All Southerners know exactly when "by and by" is. They might not use the term, but they know the concept well.

Only a Southerner knows instinctively that the best gesture of solace for a neighbor who’s got trouble is a plate of hot fried chicken and a big bowl of cold potato salad. If the neighbor’s trouble is a real crisis, they also know to add a large banana puddin!

Only Southerners grow up knowing the difference between “right near” and “a right fer piece.” They also know that “just down the road” can be 1 mile or 20.

Only a Southerner, both knows and understands, the difference between a redneck, a good ol’ boy, and po’ white trash.

No true Southerner would ever assume that the car with the flashing turn signal is actually going to make a turn.

A Southerner knows that “fixin” can be used as a noun, a verb, or an adverb.

Only Southerners make friends while standing in lines. We don't do “queues,” we do “lines”; and when we're “in line,” we talk to everybody!

Put 100 Southerners in a room and half of them will discover they’re related, even if only by marriage.

Southerners never refer to one person as “ya’ll.”

Southerners know grits come from corn and how to eat them.

Southerners know that Coke refers to all carbonated beverages.

Every Southerner knows tomatoes with eggs, bacon, grits, and coffee are perfectly wonderful; that red eye gravy is also a breakfast food; and that fried green tomatoes are not a breakfast food.

When you hear someone say, “Well, I caught myself lookin’,” you know you are in the presence of a genuine Southerner!

Only true Southerners say “sweet tea” and “sweet milk.” Sweet tea indicates the need for sugar and lots of it -- we do not like our tea unsweetened. “Sweet milk” means you don't want buttermilk.

And a true Southerner knows you don’t scream obscenities at little old ladies who drive 30 MPH on the freeway. You just say, “Bless her heart” and go your own way.

The true Southerner also knows how to hunker down. Also how to tote someone to the store and when ya'all get there grab a buggy for the fixins.

To those of you who’re still a little embarrassed by your Southerness: Take two tent revivals and a dose of sausage gravy and call me in the morning. Bless your heart!

And to those of you who are still having a hard time understanding all this Southern stuff, bless your hearts, I hear they are fixin' to have classes on Southernness as a second language!

And for those that are not from the South but have lived here for a long time, ya'll need a sign to hang on ya’lls front porch that reads “I aint from the South but I got here as fast as I could.”

Bless your hearts, ya'll have a blessed day

[DJFyrewolf36]

Im from Nevada, but I exhibit signs of "Southerness". I think us long term Nevadans experence a similar thing.

I was saying Y'all long before I spent any time in the south lol.

And YES I do know the difference between a Hissy fit and a conniption fit *thank you mom...*

[mruffruff]

I'm fixing to become a true Southerner, but I've only been down south for 15 years!:D

Mary

[sirrahned]

Originally posted by sirrahbed
"Southernness" :D


A Southerner knows that “fixin” can be used as a noun, a verb, or an adverb.



a few other southern phrases for You.

Becha..I will bet you

Aintcha..Aren't you going to

I speck I reckon......I guess

We'll See...........Go ask your mom and stop bugging me

I done et'.........I have already eaten Thank You

Set a Spell........Please have a seat and sit for a while

down the road a piece.......a long ways away

plumb tuckered out...I am very tired

Ah-hankerin...Wanting something real bad

[CountryWolf07]

Heh.. I kind of have some of that in me.. eventhough I'm a Northern! :p But hey.. after listening to a lot of country music.. and I think I'd fit down in the South pretty easily.. when I move down to TN after college.. hehe..

[CatMama78]

This reminds me of something:

Courtesy of Jeff Foxworthy:

"Wigadiga"

You didn't bring a hankie, witcha diga ? (with you, did you?)

:D :D

[dukedogsmom]

I say "reckon" alot, too. When I first visited my brother in Maryland, I was truly shocked and disappointed to learn they didn't have sweet tea. They also put gravy on french fries. Gross! I related to a lot in that. And, I had potato salad for dinner(supper)

[CountryWolf07]

Originally posted by CatMama78
This reminds me of something:

Courtesy of Jeff Foxworthy:

"Wigadiga"

You didn't bring a hankie, witcha diga ? (with you, did you?)

:D :D

LOL

Or..

With Ya Did Ya?

Did you bring your truck with you did you?

Haha..

From the Blue Collar Comedy Tour DVD! :D Man I LOVE that DVD. It is hilarious..

[Sirrahsim]

*shudder* it's all so quaint and..... indicitive of the south. .. I think I need to run to Starbucks:rolleyes: :D :D

(though it won't be long before Starbucks conquers the entire world... even the little hick towns in the south!!)

[dappledoxie]

Put 100 Southerners in a room and half of them will discover they’re related, even if only by marriage.

hehe Soo true, I can be anywhere and find someone I'm related to, not in the bad sense but just by marriage or long down the line. lol

I say yonder, ya'll, and reckon alot! lol

Ah-hankerin...Wanting something real bad
also something I say alot. lol

buuuttttt....

And a true Southerner knows you don’t scream obscenities at little old ladies who drive 30 MPH on the freeway. You just say, “Bless her heart” and go your own way.

Definatley not something I do, I can't help but at least fuss alittle.... lol

[CatMama78]

Originally posted by CountryWolf07
LOL

Or..

With Ya Did Ya?

Did you bring your truck with you did you?

Haha..

From the Blue Collar Comedy Tour DVD! :D Man I LOVE that DVD. It is hilarious..

YES!!! It was on Comedy Central this past weekend!! Those guys are great!! My favorite though was "Sopisticated people have retirement plans, Rednecks Play the Lottery"!!! Lol, That's me :)

[trayi52]

ROFLMAO, I know all these!! I love red eye gravy, fact is I can make some real good red eye gravy, and it is just yummy on good ole country Ham!!

I like fried taters and gravy too! I was raised up on frieds taters and gravy!! Yummy!

I love these Debbie, they are all so funny! I am pure southern, I passed the test!!

Willie:D

[dukedogsmom]

Forgot to mention the red eye gravy! I know all about that, too. I just don't care for it or country ham. Too salty. Guess that's why I didn't mention them. I grew up knowing all about that stuff. We also have some gravy that's my favorite. It's called Indian gravy. Don't ask me how it got it's name. But you fry sausage and make gravy like always except you use meal instead of flour. Now I'm wanting some! Haven't had it in years. And, my favorite thing to put over it is chilli sauce. Anyone heard of that?

[sirrahbed]

Originally posted by Sirrahsim
*shudder* it's all so quaint and..... indicitive of the south. .. I think I need to run to Starbucks:rolleyes: :D :D


:D Well Missy, I'd sure like to see you turn your nose up at some sweet tea and fried okra!!! You have LOTS of southern in you. like it or not:p

[dukedogsmom]

This is too funny! Along with my potato salad, I had fried okra! No lie. We went to the farmer's market today and got a bunch of stuff.

[sirrahbed]

Originally posted by dukedogsmom
This is too funny! Along with my potato salad, I had fried okra! No lie. We went to the farmer's market today and got a bunch of stuff.
Oh!! That sounds SOOO good! Tell me, do you put hard boiled eggs in your potato salad? mayo or mustard? both?:D
BTW I made slaw this week that is to die for!!! In fact I am going to post it here!!
from Quick Cooking July/August 2004 p.7

1/2 cup mayo
1-1/2 Tsp honey
3/4 tsp sugar
3/4 tsp prepared mustard
1/8 tsp celery salt (I forgot this!!)
2 cups shredded cabbage
1 cup shredded carrot
1/2 cup golden raisins

Mix all but last three, toss in the last three. Cover and refrigerate overnight . Four servings. YUM!!!

[DJFyrewolf36]

Originally posted by sirrahbed
:D Well Missy, I'd sure like to see you turn your nose up at some sweet tea and fried okra!!! You have LOTS of southern in you. like it or not:p

I wouldn't....I want okra!!! *I love fried okra...I blame my hubby for this. Whats wierd is he is from Arizona!*

[CountryWolf07]

This is my favorite part of the movie - Blue Collar Comedy Tour - I laugh EVERY time!!

Ron White: I got thrown out of a bar in New York City. Now, when I say I got thrown out of a bar, I don't mean someone asked me to leave, and we walked to the door together, and I said, "Bye everyone, I gotta go!" Six bouncers picked me up and hurled me out of that bar like I was a Frisbee. Those big old New York bouncers that think about bouncing. They hang out with other bouncers, talking about bouncing. They go home at night and watch Road House and fondle themselves. For wearing a hat. I walk into a bar and the bouncer comes over to me, real pissy, and goes, "Take off the hat!" I'm like, "What's the deal?" He goes, "I'll tell you what the deal is. Gay people in this area wear hats; we're tryin' to keep them out of our club!" Oh really? The only way we can tell down in Texas is if they have their hair cut like, yours. And he got all pissed. Anyway, I took off the hat, and he walked away. About an hour later, I was drinking and I forgot. Ever forget? It happened to me. I put the hat on, and he comes back over. Now, I'm between six-one and six-six depending on which convenience store I'm leaving. I weigh two hundred and thirty pounds, and this guy comes over, poking me in the shoulder. He says, "You're outta here!" and I said, "I don't think so, Scooter!" And I was wrong. They hurled me out of that bar. And then they squared off with me in the parking lot, and I backed down from the fight, cause I don't know how many of them it would have taken to whip my ass, but I knew how many they were going to use. That's a handy little piece of information, right there. The police got called because we broke a chair on the way out, and I refused to pay for it. I refused to pay for it cause *we* broke it over *my* thigh. And at that point, I had the right to remain silent, but I didn't have the ability. The cop was like, "Mr. White, you are being charged with drunk in public-KA!" I was like, "Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey! I was drunk in a bar! They, threw me into public-KA! I don't want to be drunk in public! I wanna be drunk in a bar, which is perfectly legal! Arrest them!" He didn't arrest them, instead he had me do a field sobriety check, where you stand on one foot, raise the other foot six inches off the ground, and count to thirty. I made it to "woo!" Is that going to be close enough? It wasn't, so they called in for my arrest record. There's some good news! Satellites are linking up in outer space. Computer banks at NASA are kicking on. There's a telegraph in French, Texas, going: beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep.
[Takes breath]
Ron White: Beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep. This part takes a while. Brrrrinnnng! Shorthand.
[Pause]
Ron White: Beep. Now, I told you that story, to tell you this story. When I was seventeen, I was arrested for being drunk in... public.
Jeff Foxworthy: Kinda seems to be a pattern there, Ron.
Ron White: If you knew Morse code, you'd know that already. And one DWI, which was a bogus charge, cause it turns out they were stopping every driver, traveling down that particular sidewalk. And that's profiling. And profiling is wrong! The arresting officer, who I had literally known, all my life. You know what I mean? This guy lived four doors down the street me, in a town of less than three hundred people. *We've met.* Now, he takes me to jail, and he asks me if I have any aliases.
[Confused, stupid look]
Ron White: And I was just being a smartass, and I said, "Yeah. They call me, "Tater Salad!" " Seventeen years later, I'm handcuffed on a bench in New York with blood coming out of my nose, and this cop goes, "Are you Ron 'Tater Salad' White?" Ya caught me! Ya caught the tater!

[CountryWolf07]

Gotta post another.. ;)

Bill Engvall: I know my daughter's sixteen, and she's sitting in her room, on the computer, listening to music, and little boys are calling, oh my God. We had a kid call the house at *two* in the *morning.* Oh yeah, I lost it. First of all, I'm in La-La Land with Shania Twain up in the mountains somewhere. I hear a phone ring, and I'm like, 'Who's got a phone up in the mountains!' Finally I realized it was my phone, so I'm already ticked, and I go, 'Hello!' And this little boy goes, "Uh, is Emily there?" 'Dude! If you've got a brain in your skull, you will hang up this phone right now!' My wife goes, 'Bill! You gotta be nice!' No ma'am! Nice stops at midnight! She goes, 'what are you gonna do when these boys come over to our house?' Oh, I'll tell you what I'll do! I'll pull the young lad in close, so only he and I can hear the conversation. And I'll say, 'Look at me boy! Look at me! You see that little girl, over there? She's my only little girl, man. She's *my life.* So, if you have any thoughts, about hugging, or kissing, you remember these words: I've got no problem going back to prison!'

[dukedogsmom]

We put mayo(actually salad dressing) mustard, pickles, onions and hard boiled eggs in the potato salad. My mom makes some of the best around. I can't stand the stuff in the stores because it's nothing like hers.