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minkyboodle
05-03-2004, 10:41 PM
Hi, well umm...this is going to be a first for me...My bf of almost 2 years just lost his mother (she died of cancer) about 9 months ago....this will be his first mothers day without his mother...i'm not sure what to expect and i'm kinda worried about how it will go. I'm not sure how he will react to it and i'm kinda worried that me doing somethign with my mom or for her will make him feel worse or something...

anyone have any experience with this? I'm not sure what i should do or if i should ignore it or umm...what....eek...

Logan
05-03-2004, 10:44 PM
My suggestion would be to tell him, in advance, that you are concerned, and see what he would like to do, or what he would like to have you do for Mother's Day. Hopefully, he will be honest with you and you can do what he wishes. I'm sure it will be painful, but he is lucky to have you with him to help him get through it.

moosmom
05-04-2004, 11:01 AM
Logan,

Great advice!!

Karen
05-04-2004, 11:08 AM
I agree - do mention it. We "motherless children" feel bombarded this time of year with "Don't forget mom!" ads, commands to buy things for her, take her out to dinner, etc. It's not fun. And it's not like he could have forgotten it's almost mother's day. Ask if doing something with you and your mom on mother's day would help him, or make it hurt more. It's different for everyone.

ramanth
05-04-2004, 11:31 AM
My best friend, Shawntell, lost her mom this past August. My own mom will be out of town on Mom's Day, so I think I'm going to do a split deal and spend some of the day with Shawntell and some of the day with Andy and his mom.

Although, she may end up spending the day with her boyfriend and his mom.

Definately talk with him about it. :)

Tonya
05-04-2004, 12:16 PM
My dad commited suicide on Mother's Day, so every Mother's Day has always been stressful on me. This year, I finally just came out and asked my grandmother what she wanted. I wish I'd asked a long time ago because it really cleared the air up.

Like the others said, I think you should be straight forward and ask him what he wants.

minkyboodle
05-04-2004, 04:22 PM
Thanks for the advice everyone, I think i'll probably talk to him about it either tonight or tomarrow night. I know this isn't going to be exactly easy.

Thanks again.