What should I do?

[slleipnir]

As some of you might know, I used to ride quite a bit. I took lessons for about 4 years I think. I got scared away from it after I bad fall (I was thrown into a wall and hurt my back..) then I did get curage to go back, and 2 lessons after I fell again. So as stupid as it sounds, it totally ruined my confidence in riding and I stopped completely. It's been like 2-3 years since I've ridden and I miss it SO much. Then again, I'm super nervous abou riding as well. I don't think it would be worth it if I broke something or ended up like Christifer Reive (sp) or whatever his name is..you know, superman. ;)

Anyway. I've been telling myself to go back to the barn for a very long time but I talk myself out of it everytime. Well, tonight, I just kinda went there, went in, and started to talk with my old instructer. I watched a couple of lessons, andit made me miss it even more.

One other thing I should say. I am probably the BIGGEST worry wort in the world. I get very nervous about silly things I shouldn't. I have little to no confidence in myself. With that said, it makes it hard for me to get on the horse and not be scared..and I'm sure you know that doesn't help the horse. They can sense it, and usually it bothers them. (Atleast the last few times I rode and was nervous it spooked the horse)

What should I do? I'm thinking I'm gonna go try a couple lessons, and if it doesn't work then I probably am not ment ot be a rider. I wish I didn't care about pain and being hurt :o I know it's so stupid, but I HATE pain and the thought of it scares me (Which is weird, cause if/after I get injured, I'm completely fine with it..it's just the though of getting hurt that scares me I think..not actually BEING hurt. Well that and I don't feel like dying.

I asked my friend who told me for a while she wants to try riding. I asked her if she'd go with me, so maybeif she does it will make me go. Maybe I'll get back into to...

I'm going to start western. I rode english for a couple years and even did jumping. It's probably the only thing I can say I was ever good at (which is weird cause I suck at everything)

Ok enough of my rambling about how much of a coward I am :o I hope you don't think I'm some moron cause I got scared away from a couple of falls..I'm not like that with everything. It's just I rode for like 4 years with never falling (I've been bucked and that but I never fell. My instructer said Midnight was the worse any of his horses ever got in situations like that and was suprised I didn't fall..I guess I had so much willpower NOT to fall :p God how sad...)

[Desert Arabian]

I'm glad to see you want to get back to riding! I hate to see people leave horseback riding and never come back after an incident- it makes me sad for some reason, lol.

You are doing the right thing- talking to your old instructor, hanging around the barns, etc. If you aren't exactly ready to get on a horse, maybe you could have someone pick out the calmest horse at the barn, then you watch other people ride that horse, get an idea of how it moves, responds to people, etc. and spend quality time walking and grooming that horse. Once you feel you have the horses' trust and/or comfortable with that horse, mount the horse, and do VERY BASIC work in the arena- walking, stopping, turning, etc. Have a person walk you around the arena if you really feel the need of extra protection. Ride for about 10 minutes or so and stop. Talk to the horse while you ride, let the horse know exactly who is on its back aiding them around the arena. I find it extremely relaxing to talk to horses when I ride them, about the stupidest stuff too. I find it to be very calming for me and the horse, and they actually listen unlike a lot of people I try to talk to. Talking to a horse is very effective! If you are really worried about being injured where a protective vest along with a helmet. You have to be sure though, that you do not show your nervousness while you are on the horses back, because they can sense that and will take full advantage for your uneasiness if they really desire to do so.

Thankfully, I have never been truly afraid of horses, even when I was extremely little, I was bitten by the horse bug at age 3 or 4 or so and have been obsessed with them ever since. I have been thorough so much, if I wasn't so obsessed I would want nothing to do with horses! LOL! I've been kicked and bitten so many times I lost count- last year I got nailed in the shin and I have a permanent chip in my bone and I almost got killed by a horse named KJ, he missed my head by about 2 inches- if Adam hadn't screamed "DUCK". OH!! And the time I was cantering around on Spirit bareback and the little s*&# slammed on his brakes sending me flying over his head and neck! Or the time Jack pinned my leg against a nail in the wall! Or the time a turkey came running out on the trail causing Buddy to gallop thorough heavy woods smackin my face in tree braches and limbs. AHH! I have plenty of good ol' memories! :rolleyes: :p

If you get back on a horse and ride after a traumatic incident it teaches you the best kind of confidence in the world- I guarantee it. It takes a lot of guts to get on the back of a 1500 # animal who could easily kill you! Just take it one step at a time, nice and slow, get to know the horse/s you want to ride really well from the ground and work your way up. Once you re-gain your confidence in your riding ability it will be the greatest award ever!!

Oh, btw, check out the book "She Flies Without Wings", one of the most powerful horse books I have ever read- I am 1/2 thorough it and can't put it down. I can PM you details if you want, lemme know.

Good luck! Get back to riding!

-YLL
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[slleipnir]

Thanks, that helps. My instructor said he'd start me off nice and slow to get use to it. However, I can't see me getting on without being nervous. I know you need to get back up and ride after a fall. Infact, the horses I was riding that threw me into the wall did that too, he just decided he wanted to go a different way and basically slammed on the brakes :rolleyes: I did get right back on, but my back hurt so much I couldn't stay on. I rode again shortly after and fell again which is why I'm nervous. Gah.

You're lucky to have the 'horse bug' or whatever you'd call it :p I want to be like that haha XD

[G.P.girl]

it's great you want to start riding again! you should just take it really slow, if you don't feel like riding yet, just be around the horses and barn and other riders. i know falling is scary, but it's usually not as bad as it seems at first. i've only fallen once in like 6 years, but it wasn't too bad i was just really sore after that. (i fell in to a jump and then the horse almost stepped on me.)....lol i'm kinda getting off topic here.
maybe you could do some balance exersizes on the horses (like vaulting or something) to make you feel more secure on the horses. but it's great you're getting back in to this! i wish i could ride again:(

[petlover]

I am soooooo happy that you decided to try riding again. I have been thrown off quite a few times accually. But you HAVE to get back on. You have to, or that horse will know that it can get away with stuff with you and that is NOT good. You always want the horse to know who is boss. Just stay in a small area for a while. And remember, get to know the horse that you are going to ride, before you ride him/her. The bonding is very important. Do not get on a horse that you don't get along with. And if you don't like the horse's ground manners then you probably won't like it's mounted manners either. If the horse does something that really bothers you, then ask for another one. Don't be afraid to ask.:) Just remember BREATH when you are on the horse, if you are talking, you are breathing, so keep a steady conversation with your horse. It doesn't matter at all what you talk about as long as you are talking. And remember STAY CALM!:D

[Desert Arabian]

Originally posted by slleipnir
Thanks, that helps. My instructor said he'd start me off nice and slow to get use to it. However, I can't see me getting on without being nervous. I know you need to get back up and ride after a fall. Infact, the horses I was riding that threw me into the wall did that too, he just decided he wanted to go a different way and basically slammed on the brakes :rolleyes: I did get right back on, but my back hurt so much I couldn't stay on. I rode again shortly after and fell again which is why I'm nervous. Gah.

You're lucky to have the 'horse bug' or whatever you'd call it :p I want to be like that haha XD

That is very nice of your instructor! I really hope everything works out pretty good for you, of course their will be minor bumps- that's horseback riding for you, and you can get back in the saddle with 100% confidence!

Yeah, I have no clue how exactly I got the horse bug when I was little, but thank the Lord I did! I was 4 years old and just facinated with the huge draft horses- which were about 100 times my size at age 4- and I was never the least bit afraid of them. :D My aunt used to have 8 Belgians and I just adored to hang out with them. The horse bug is awesome, I wish I could pass it to you! I'll ship it FedEx, just gimme your address- LOL! :p


You always want the horse to know who is boss.

AY! NEIN! NEIN! NEIN! ACK! I strongly dislike it when people say that ("you want the horse to know who's boss"). The rider is not the boss of the horse, they are a partner with the horse, they are the horses' guide. If anyone were to be the boss it would be the horse, not the rider, afterall, that is why they are throwing people from their saddles. If riders have the attitude "I'm the boss, you listen to me or else" they are not going to get very far and indepth with their horse and riding. Horseback riding is partnership, it's a team. The horse is constantly teaching you things: how to sit properly and align your spine, how to be graceful and fluid with your movements, how to use different aids such as seat, legs, hands, and voice. Horses teach control, confidence, self-esteem, and other benifiting factors. We teach the horse how to move gracefully, powerful, swiftly- not choppy, bouncy, sloppy, etc. We teach horses to accept weight on their backs which is assosiated with "danger" in the wild- a whole new game for them. Horse and rider are a team, no one is more controlling than the other, if anything, the horse teaches us more than we teach the horse. Yes, the rider can have more dominance at times, but the horse will come back with dominance 10 times higher than the rider to quickly gain back their spot in the team. When horse and rider are under the influence of teamwork, their movements are amazing, their coordination is amazing, everything about the team is amazing. When horse and rider are under the influence of "I'm boss, you're not" you get horses disobeying, riders loosing control of their tempers, riders giving incorrect commands, sloppy movement- you look like your riding a camel, etc. It's teamwork, it's partnership.

$0.02, no more like $0.10

[G.P.girl]

Originally posted by YellowLabLover

AY! NEIN! NEIN! NEIN! ACK! If riders have the attitude "I'm the boss, you listen to me or else" they are not going to get very far and indepth with their horse and riding. Horseback riding is partnership, it's a team.

lol that NIEN made me laugh. :P

i always thought of showing the horse who's boss as "i will show you which way to go and we can go together" or something like that. as working together as a team but the rider being the guide. i can't explian it very well. buti hate it when people jerk and whip thier horses around trying to "show them who's boss"

[Ally Cat's Mommy]

Good luck!! I really admire your courage. I also had a bad fall and hurt my back about 12 years ago, and I have NEVER managed to get over it and get back on a horse. When I see people riding I feel a pang of jealousy, but whenever I try I can't bring myself to get back up there!

Hope it works out well for you.

[FizzGiggs_Mommy]

I usually dont talk about my horses but I do have two.

I think you should get back into riding. Even if you just do western pleasure (Which is what I do). I have a Appaloosa Cookie and a thurobred (SP) BC that has thrown me several times while doing barrel racing (Some times my fault sometimes hers) Now we just stick to plane old trail ridding. But to get to my point I just brought a girl ridding for the very first time in her life and she loved it I put her on a friends pony. So I say JUST DO IT and have fun.

[FizzGiggs_Mommy]

PS In the picture the horses head to the left id my TB