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GoldenRetrLuver
02-26-2004, 11:30 PM
I just need to vent...

I've been talking to a friend of mine from school last year, and she's decided to get a puppy. It's her first dog--can you guess what breed she's getting? A Golden Retriever. Know why? Because she likes Daisy, and thinks they're cute. Goldens are great dogs, but I really, really don't think they're the best choice for a first time dog owner, esspecially if you haven't done any researching. I researched for months before I decided to go with a Golden...Anyway, she's getting the puppy next week from someone who is advertising them at her high school...who, I'm guessing is a BYB. :( She will be 3 months old then. She's asking me all sorts of questions, like "Where should the puppy sleep?"; and she also has no idea what spaying or neutering is. I'm giving her as much information on them as I possibly can, but I can't help but be upset about the whole thing. I've given information about the kind of dog food I feed, my vet's address and number, (She doesn't have one picked out yet..and since she's moving a few hours away from mine, it's not an option, so I'm searching for another one) what the puppy needs when you bring her home, information about spay/neutering...and the list goes on.

Maybe I'm just overeacting...but the fact that it's a Golden Retriever hits me a little hard, esspecially if I don't know if it will end up in the right home.
I'm talking to her as I type, so I'm off to help her some more.

Tonya
02-26-2004, 11:36 PM
Well, I can certainly understand your frustration. I'm going through the same thing with a friend too. To make matters worse, my friend really wants a minpin and she has small kids. (Don't worry, I'm working on her.)

But also, everyone was inexperienced at dog ownership one time or another in life. Just as parenting. I didn't have a freakin clue when I had my son, but it seemed to work out ok. lol. It isn't something that you learn through osmosis. You pretty much have to learn through experience. At least she is asking questions. That shows that she wants to do the right thing and be a knowledgeable owner. You gotta start somewhere!

Good luck in helping her out, I'm sure she'll need you.

Moose
02-26-2004, 11:40 PM
I'm sorry, Jules. :(

Like Tonya said, at least she is seeking some help from you.

Unfortunately, all you can do now is offer your best advice and hope everything goes well.

GoldenRetrLuver
02-26-2004, 11:40 PM
Originally posted by Tonya
At least she is asking questions. That shows that she wants to do the right thing and be a knowledgeable owner. You gotta start somewhere!


That's probably the only thing I'm happy about...lol. But I wish she woud ask questions before she goes out and buys the dog.
I understand that we all start out somewhere, and unfortunatly, it's the dog who always ends up in the middle.

K9soul
02-27-2004, 10:10 AM
I certainly understand your concern about her lack of research and just making an impulse decision because she thinks Daisy is cute, but I actually kinda disagree that a golden isn't good for a first-time dog owner. I think they are actually one of the easier breeds because they very rarely have dominance or stubbornness issues, are easy to train and love to please. They don't require complicated grooming, tend to get along well with everyone, and are extremely adaptable.

That said, goldens are very popular, and sadly, that means a lot of backyard breeders, which means those goldens have a much higher likelihood of a myriad of health problems and the possiblity of behaviorism that is not typical for a golden at all. Also, NO dog is best for those who aren't really willing to research and find out about their needs and if their personality is one that fits their lifestyle!

For a first-time dog owner, I seriously believe reading up on breeds and their tendencies, and then finding a responsible, reputable breeder, is the best way to go. Rescues are of course wonderful... IF you know dogs and how to handle the various problems that can come with a rescue. Of course, things can still turn out fine with a BYB dog or a rescue, but it's more of a gamble, and if a totally inexperienced, new to dog behavior person gets one of these dogs that turns out to have atypical problem behavior or terrible health problems, they are going to have a bad experience and it could end up a disaster for both dog and family.

I know you know all of this, but just trying to throw out ideas that maybe you could talk to your friend about too. I really hope she will listen to you!

guster girl
02-27-2004, 10:16 AM
I'm not an idiot, but, I am just curious what makes a Golden Retriever not a good first dog?

wolfie
02-27-2004, 10:57 AM
Everyone has to start out as an inexperienced owner! :)

When we first got Cocoa I had no idea how to take care of a dog. (I was 13) In fact, we didn't even know what a Shih Tzu looked like when we went to pick her up from the family that was getting rid of her! We didn't know how to housetrain a dog, what a crate was, how much vet bills cost, nothing. But when Cocoa came home we started asking the vet questions, getting dog books from the library, ect. We became good responsible pet owners. :)

So don't worry about your friend, just help her out with all her questions, and she just might turn out to be a responsible pet owner too. :)

lv4dogs
02-27-2004, 11:34 AM
Originally posted by K9soul
I certainly understand your concern about her lack of research and just making an impulse decision because she thinks Daisy is cute, but I actually kinda disagree that a golden isn't good for a first-time dog owner. I think they are actually one of the easier breeds because they very rarely have dominance or stubbornness issues, are easy to train and love to please. They don't require complicated grooming, tend to get along well with everyone, and are extremely adaptable.

That said, goldens are very popular, and sadly, that means a lot of backyard breeders, which means those goldens have a much higher likelihood of a myriad of health problems and the possiblity of behaviorism that is not typical for a golden at all. Also, NO dog is best for those who aren't really willing to research and find out about their needs and if their personality is one that fits their lifestyle!

For a first-time dog owner, I seriously believe reading up on breeds and their tendencies, and then finding a responsible, reputable breeder, is the best way to go. Rescues are of course wonderful... IF you know dogs and how to handle the various problems that can come with a rescue. Of course, things can still turn out fine with a BYB dog or a rescue, but it's more of a gamble, and if a totally inexperienced, new to dog behavior person gets one of these dogs that turns out to have atypical problem behavior or terrible health problems, they are going to have a bad experience and it could end up a disaster for both dog and family.

I know you know all of this, but just trying to throw out ideas that maybe you could talk to your friend about too. I really hope she will listen to you!

i have to agree

pitc9
02-27-2004, 12:10 PM
I'm sure that with you offering her all the help she needs, everything will be fine!
Your a wonderful golden owner and I'm sure you'll always have the answers to all of her questions!!:D

*LabLoverKEB*
02-27-2004, 04:09 PM
I really don't know what to say...... I just hope the puppy doesn't get hurt, and that she listens to you, and that she learns from you! I really hope that she gets that new pup spayed/neutered., too. Good luck, Julie. Keep us updated!

GoldenRetrLuver
02-27-2004, 06:19 PM
Maybe I should have said "IMO".
I've found that Goldens go through very bad puppy stages; such as digging, chewing, and getting into things they aren't supposed too. Yes, I realize there are exceptions, and most puppy stages are like that, etc...but it's my opinion. Most people aren't willing to put with it, so guess where the pup ends up? They may be described as popular, the perfect dog, (which I don't beg to differ with. ;)) but they're not for everyone. She's honestly done NO research, so I'm even helping her with the basics.

*Sighs* I just hope I can do some good...

leslie flenner
02-27-2004, 07:10 PM
I know where the pup ends up- at your local shelter!!!
And hopefully it's a no-kill shelter (although there's a popular "no-kill" shelter in my area that can advertise that because if needed -illness, behaviour probs etc-, they bring the animal to the ARL to have it euthanized- that way they can call themselves "no kill") But anyway...off the topic...
Not all shelter dogs have behavior probs. In fact, from what i've gathered from talking to shelter workers, most dogs relequished to them are because "my partner has allergies", "my child has allergies", I have to move and my new landlord doesn't accept pets" (THAT'S a big one!)
Less are there for behaviour probs (but it may depend on the day your there!).
Some shelters have dogs from 9/11 and/or from Puerto Rico (? not sure- jan correct me on the country the US is trying to help with dog overpopulation!).

K9soul
02-27-2004, 07:14 PM
So far, every pup I have had have gone through those stages, though Willie was the only one I never had too much trouble with chewing on things. Cody was awful awful awful about chewing. Tommy is bad about chewing on rags and socks and things but never chewed on the furniture, whereas Tasha once chewed up one of our kitchen table chairs very badly and the table and chair set was brand new! She was around a year old at the time too... man makes me glad those days are past for her! hehe

Hopefully you'll be able to educate her about all that though. Puppies can be very destructive and just when you think they've grown out of it, they love to prove ya wrong! :D

BCBlondie
02-27-2004, 07:28 PM
Not to start anything, but I know A LOT of people that get goldens as their first dogs. How old is this girl? Do her parents know about this? Maybe her parents will help take care of the dog...

GoldenRetrLuver
02-27-2004, 07:33 PM
Originally posted by BCBlondie
Not to start anything, but I know A LOT of people that get goldens as their first dogs. How old is this girl? Do her parents know about this? Maybe her parents will help take care of the dog...

You're not staring anything. It's just my opinion.

Yep, her mom knows about it. She doesn't care as long as my friend takes care of the dog...

DogLover9501
02-27-2004, 07:40 PM
Originally posted by wolfie
Everyone has to start out as an inexperienced owner! :)

When we first got Cocoa I had no idea how to take care of a dog. (I was 13) In fact, we didn't even know what a Shih Tzu looked like when we went to pick her up from the family that was getting rid of her! We didn't know how to housetrain a dog, what a crate was, how much vet bills cost, nothing. But when Cocoa came home we started asking the vet questions, getting dog books from the library, ect. We became good responsible pet owners. :)

So don't worry about your friend, just help her out with all her questions, and she just might turn out to be a responsible pet owner too. :)

I agree!!

I grew up with a pom, but she was my moms.

I was about 8 years old, when I got my little sweet black lab puppy, and I didnt know a whole lot either, I would hide away in those "chewing" stages, but as he got older, and I got older, I learned about them, trained him to do lots of things, got him walking right, eating right.

And surprised my parents with all the things I have learned about the breed and all the things I have taught him!

So I think with alot of advice from you, and alot of committment(sp?) and dedication from her, she will do fine!

DogLover9501
02-27-2004, 07:49 PM
BUT I also know what you mean by not for a first time owner.

But NOBODY would want a first time owner to get a dog like their dog.

Like when we first got Jasper, a friend of my dads asked me his breeders # and prices..etc..etc...etc and thats ALL nothing about the breed, and all he owned was a GSD that was tied up to a little chain his entire life, and I kept saying....well Boxers are NOT outside dogs..etc..etc and he was not even listening to me!:mad: But thank god--they didn't get one!

So I know how frustrating that is, maybe you could ask her to find maybe a GROWN golden at a shelter? or maybe a better breeder, who health checks them, or maybe hold off on the whole thing, until she buys everything she needs and researches a bunch of different breeds. Or ask her why ELSE she wants a golden, if she knows anything about their temperment, needs and personality! And if not--doesn't she think she should learn?

Just keep trying;)

QueenScoopalot
02-27-2004, 09:24 PM
I've never had a purebred dog...with the exception of Peanut who's a four and a half lb. longhaired chihuahua. She was rescued from an alcoholic man unable to care for himself. I hope this person knows that it's a lot of work housebreaking and training a puppy. Too many end up in shelters due to bad training. It's one thing to fall in love with a puppy, and a whole other ballgame to be in it for the long haul! Leslie, it is Puerto Rico where shelters around the north east are shipping in "satos". I guess that in one way says something right is going on, as far as dogs not reproducing around here, as in other areas of the country. If only it worked with cats. :(

leslie flenner
02-27-2004, 09:30 PM
What are satos?

QueenScoopalot
02-27-2004, 09:35 PM
I believe sato means lost one in Spanish. Something like that anyway :D

catnapper
02-27-2004, 10:14 PM
Ugh. I went through the same exact thing with my friend a few years ago. She was determined to get her daughter one for Christmas.... 1st time dog owner gets puppy as a cute gift. She was immediately overwhelmed and kept the poor guy tied to the banister on a 4' chain all day. Another friend and I tried to tell her that she was abusing this dog and that she should give him to a rescue so that he's find a family that would be better suited to him. She still has him, he still sits tied to the railing everyday. She couldn't deal with a big, lumbering (and VERY dumb... true, he is the dumbest dog I ever met) dog that jumped and chewed his way through everything. He also is the sweetest dog I ever met. I feel so bad that she wouldn't listen to us.... we know her and we "knew" a golden was the wrong choice for her. She needed somethng with less energy and 'oomph' - also something a wee bit older.

No wonder he always bolted as soon as he got outside without a leash.:(

I hope your friend is willing to take the time neccessary to give the pup (whatever breed) the time and attention it needs.

GoldenRetrLuver
02-27-2004, 10:33 PM
Before I convinced her about it, she wanted to keep the dog in the garage. :mad: I told her "NO..you can't keep a puppy, or a dog in a garage." So, she said the dog will stay inside.

I hate this. :(

Karen
02-27-2004, 10:43 PM
Buy her the best "training a new puppy" book you can find. Wrap it up nicely, and offer to help as much as you can.

There is no "ideal" dog for a first-time owner IMHO. She will learn, and best yet, she has you to help her. And as you have been well-trained by Daisy, I am sure you will be able to help.

guster girl
02-27-2004, 10:53 PM
Originally posted by GoldenRetrLuver
Before I convinced her about it, she wanted to keep the dog in the garage. :mad: I told her "NO..you can't keep a puppy, or a dog in a garage." So, she said the dog will stay inside.

I hate this. :(

If you're really so against it, you may want to just do as Karen suggests and get her a couple of really good books, and, point her in the direction of a good obedience class for puppies. I think she's just uneducated, but, if it's something you really hate, then, you may not want to get too involved. But, if it's just venting, then, look at this as an opportunity to teach a person on the care and attention a dog needs. That's a good opportunity!

GoldenRetrLuver
02-27-2004, 10:56 PM
Thanks Karen. I'll try that. I haven't seen her since the end of last year, so I'm not sure when/if I'll see her again. I also have a book called "Golden Retrievers for Dummies" which I got when Daisy was a pup. I think I'll send her that too, or buy her a copy. I'll see if I can go over to her house when she gets the pup, before she moves...

clara4457
02-28-2004, 12:53 AM
I actually think rescue organizations are good places for first time dog owners to adopt a dog from. The advantage of a rescue is that they usually know a great deal about the personality of the dog they are adopting out and will only adopt out dogs that would fit into the lifestyle of the adoptee.

A book suggestion I have is Ian Dunbars "Before and After Getting Your Puppy : The Positive Approach to Raising a Happy, Healthy, and Well-Behaved Dog". It is easy to read and follow.

Everyone was a first time dog owner at one time and I think your friend is very lucky to have you as a resource. I would also research some obedience classes in your area and suggest she attend them when she gets the puppy. It will not only help solidify their bond, it will help her become more committed to the dog.

Hope everything turns out well.

K9soul
02-28-2004, 10:53 AM
Clara, that's true. I was more thinking along the lines of if someone is getting a young puppy. :)

GoldenRetrLuver
02-28-2004, 11:00 AM
Thanks for the input guys. :)
I told her about rescue organizations (gave her a few Golden Retriever Rescues), animal shelters, and all of that, but she's sold on getting a young puppy now from this person. I was talking to her yesterday, and said I would find some Obedience Classes in her area, and a Veterinarian. We'll see how it goes. If I do end up going to see the pup, I'll be sure to take pictures.

K9soul
02-28-2004, 11:02 AM
You're a good friend and a wonderful advocate for dogs Julie! That girl is lucky, I sure hope she will do the right thing and listen to someone who knows the bad along with the good of having dogs. :)

ParNone
02-28-2004, 03:57 PM
Personally, I think normally a well bred Golden is a good first time dog, but I think they're somewhat prone to Lassie syndrome and that's the drawback. People hear all these glowing reports about them and think they're gonna come out of the box already assembled, basically doing all the things you see Lassie do on TV. They're caught up in this lil' fantasy and overlook the reality that no matter what breed of puppy, they take work and training (Well Maddie was one of those rare dogs that fit the fantasy without the work, but I don't think that happens very often).

Although I do think it's somewhat personal perception, what pushes your buttons, as to whether the puppy was difficult to raise or not. Housebreaking happens to be mine, so Murph, who was really hard to housebreak, is always in my mind as my most difficult puppy. Oz and Maddie were a breeze to housebreak, so I look on their puppyhoods as easy. Oz had other issues, that I'm sure I spent just as much time working on (jumping up, barking, timid), but they don't register on my radar, because they didn't bother me as much.

Anyway, we've all got start somewhere, and in comparison to some other breeds, I think Goldens are a good first pick. Well maybe not as good as a Collie ;), but still a great dog to learn through all the novice mistakes with.

Par...