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GrShepherd
11-15-2003, 03:12 AM
I really donīt know, is there right place to tell about my problems, but Iīll try .....

Yesrteday I met mumīs new friend!:eek: It isnīt JUST friend, he is mumīs new boyfriend.... And theyīre getting to marry each other. They was together about year (and I didnīt know about it :eek: ) ..... I really donīt like this man, he isnīt nice but my mum loves him.... I really miss my favther, WHY I needed to loose him? This man has dogther, sheīs 13 years old, and she hates dogs - she is cat girl.... How I undrstand, soon they come to livu with us :eek: Iīm very confused ... Mozart hate this man to, I think he feels, that this man isnīt good . Mozart makes - grrrr - very often to Klauss and once he tried to bite him..... We Mozart and I are very angry and we miss old family very very much.. Other dogs arenīt angry to Klauss, but they arenīt realy nice to him too. This Klausīs girl has 4 cats! - Mozart hates cats!!!! I realy donīt know what to do :confused: I cried all last night,. and I didnīt understand whatīs going on!:confused: :(

Rio and Me
11-15-2003, 04:20 AM
I know to a sertain extent what you are going thought!!
i know that it most be hard to accept this man as i gather you were very close to your dad, i hope he would want your mum to be happy again and move on?
i allways go wit Rios choice in a man especielly, if she does like them its a good sign that i should be awear of them (not desgard them totally just be awear)!
you could give him (and his sprog)(and cats) a small chance etc
if there is are any signs of violence towards any of you (dogs included) get rid of them no second chances!!!
also if there is any word of "that dog must go" well you know what to do!!! they were here first!! if any thing it should be the cats that go if there is a problem!!! the cats wont pine after them but the dogs will after you!!!
Let us know what happens please
Ky and Rio

PayItForward
11-15-2003, 05:42 AM
Why don't you sit down with your mum and talk though your concerns with her ? Tell her you need time to accept this man, your mum will not expect you to love him straight away, just try to get along with him for your mums sake.

Don't forget he will never replace your dad (I'm sure he knows that) but if you are lucky he might in time become your friend.

I think that Mozart picks up on your feeling for this man, he knows you don't like the man and he reacts to your emotions. If you decided this man was alright, Mozart would calm down too.

I would try and make an effort esp with his daughter, as she is in the same suitation as you are. She will be just as concerned about her cats, as you are about your dog.

This means you can both work together to make the animal introductions easier, so no animal has to leave. Mozart might hate strange cats but I'm sure he can be retrained to leave these cats alone. Maybe having a step-sister might be fun ? You'll certainly have a lot of things in common, including you are both animal lovers.

Pam and Christian's Mommy both have mixed cat/dog households. Try PM them for advice on the introductions.

All the best, I hope things work out for everyone :)

GrShepherd
11-15-2003, 06:10 AM
Well... Actually Iīm very afaid, that Klauss will replace my father ..... I hope, that he isnīt SO bad, but Iīm really afraid.. Of course I have talked with my mum, but I understood, that sheīll be happy with Klaus .....

I need to listen at your advices, and try to make friends with Klaus and his daughter - Deina .....

I know it will be hard... Possible theyīll move to out house very son... huhhhhhh

PayItForward
11-15-2003, 06:32 AM
Originally posted by GrShepherd
Well... Actually Iīm very afaid, that Klauss will replace my father ..... I hope, that he isnīt SO bad, but Iīm really afraid.. Of course I have talked with my mum, but I understood, that sheīll be happy with Klaus .....

I need to listen at your advices, and try to make friends with Klaus and his daughter - Deina .....

I know it will be hard... Possible theyīll move to out house very son... huhhhhhh
{{{Hugs}}} to you. We are all here for you, if this helps ;)

Good luck with Klaus & Deina.

Rio and Me
11-15-2003, 07:34 AM
as payitforward said im sure he doesnt want to "replace" your dad just fill a gap that your mum has!!
if he knows how his daughter feels he should have the same thoughts for you to!!
Ky and Rio

Tonya
11-15-2003, 08:33 AM
Gr, I kind of know what you are going through. When I was 15, my parents divorced. My dad quickly moved in with his work partner, Celina. They were married within a year or two of the divorce. My mom was still sad over the divorce. I hated Celina. I was so mad about my dad being with her.

I did not talk to my dad or give Celina a chance until I was almost 20. Once I finally did, I realized that Celina was nothing like my mother. She did not replace my mom, but instead became my best friend. I realized that she truly made my dad happy and that is what counts. I really regret missing out on those few years of our friendship and not talking to my dad for so long.

Celina treats my son like her own grandchild. She's one of the first people I call when I have a problem. I've come to learn that she isn't a bad person just for loving my father.

GrShepherd
11-15-2003, 09:15 AM
Tomorow Iīll see Deina ... :rolleyes:

Mum had idea - to go to park - to picnic together ... :rolleyes:

Rio and Me
11-15-2003, 09:32 AM
With the dogs?
any its not uncommon for this type of thing to happen similar to you tonya, my mum and dad divorced a couple of years ago and dad moved in with his girlfriend (quite far away) and its not that i didnt like her she didnt want dad to see me much and give me money etc because she wanted him to be a farther to her "3" kids (argggg that made me mad), i am a jelous person (i addmit it) its not that i dont want him to be happy its just i still need a dad!!
and i havnt seen or spoken to him in months!!!
and i dont think hes happy at all now with "3" young kids (i say this because hes now working away from "home"!!!
anyhow you have the chance to make a "new family" (many dont)
so give them a chance and your mum will always love you more than her new man!!! (or his kid)
Ky and Rio
sorry for the essay

CamCamPup33
11-15-2003, 09:33 AM
aww! Im sorry about all this.. I dont know how it feels, but i would know how it feels if this happened to me.. Hang in there, we are here for ya!

::Hugs!::

GrShepherd
11-15-2003, 10:03 AM
you all are so nice people .....

popcornbird
11-15-2003, 12:28 PM
I don't really think I have any good advice, because thank God my parents are together and I've never had to deal with such an issue, and hopefully never will. I know you are scared..........I know I would be too. Maybe you can talk to your mom about your concerns. You never know, they might become your best friends and may not be that bad after all. Remember, no one can replace your father ever. You dad is your dad and will always be your dad. I hope things turn out ok for you! Wishing you the best of luck!

Karen
11-15-2003, 12:42 PM
Thank you for trying to approach this in a new way. As people said, you Dad will always be your Dad, for better or worse. Klaus I am sure is not planning on "replacing" him in your heart - and the good thing about the human heart is that it expands to fit as many people as we love - and pets, too! Miraculous, isn't it? Give Klaus and Diena a chance, and think of them as new people in the neighborhood, if that makes it easier than thinking of them as "instant family!"

GrShepherd
11-15-2003, 01:35 PM
Well, Iīll try and Iīll write how things are going ;)

rg_girlca
11-15-2003, 02:36 PM
How hard this must be for you. I really don't mean to put your mum down, but you mentioned that she was with this man for a year and you didn't know about him and now she springs on you that they are getting married. I don't think this was fair of your mum to do this to you. She should have told you about Klauss from the beginning and introduced you to him so that the both of you could have slowly gotten to know each other. I could go on and on about this, but what is done, is done.
Just take one day at a time sweetie and I pray that everything turns out well for you. We are all here for you.
Please keep us posted as we will try and help you through this.

HoRsELUvR
11-15-2003, 04:46 PM
I really hope everything works out ok.Eventually the cats and dog will probably be able to live in tolerance of each other.I hope it all turns out well.:)

MammaMangorin
11-15-2003, 05:35 PM
Adopt the cats away...... And the girl to *evil*

IttyBittyKitty
11-16-2003, 06:04 AM
My parents divorced when I was eight. My Dad, to this day, still loves Mum and has never re-married. Mum and Kerry met when I was about 9 or 10 and moved in together not very long after. I knew his daughters from before they even got together and they were the B$%%# queens from hell. They were spoilt and generally nasty.

By the time that Mum and Kerry decided to marry each other, I had become a teenager and suddenly hated Kerry with a fury that could not be matched! We clashed like red and brown. As I grew older, however, I grew very close to Kerry. I love my Dad, don't get me wrong, but he is very irresponsible and scatty at times and would never have been a good constant father figure. Kerry was, for many years, a strong male influence. I knew that Kerry had not replaced my Dad, but had given me something that Dad could not. Dad is bi-polar and could never be any other way. I never blamed him or resented Dad. I even got used to Kerry's nasty daughters. Needless to say, when Mum and Kerry split up I was heart broken and guess what?

I strongly dislike Mum's new boyfriend!

LOL

(With good reason but that's another story)

The moral of this inane rambling is that this man, Klaus, may one day become a good friend to you. No one can ever replace a loving Dad, but sometimes they can offer you something different, something to replace what you have been missing out in a different way. Don't be afraid, if you ever need someone to talk to we are always here and if anything bad ever happens, there are always people you can turn to.

11-16-2003, 06:48 AM
I have the same oppinion as all the others here! Try to see Klauss NOT as an invader, but as a possible good friend. Give him and his daughter a true chance; I bet everything will go smotther every day! good luck to you :) :)

GrShepherd
11-16-2003, 06:57 AM
Now I canīt believe, that we can be friends.....