mugsy
09-07-2003, 03:13 PM
I got this email at school the other day and thought I would share.
It's time once again to consider the candidates
> for the 2003 Stella
> Awards.
> > The Stellas are named after 81-year-old Stella
> Liebeck who spilled coffee
> > on herself and successfully sued McDonalds. That
> case inspired the
> Stella
> > Awards for the most uniquely successful tort
> lawsuits in the United
> States
> > for last year. Actually, joint awards should be
> given to the plaintiff
> > attorneys and the flaming idiots on the juries
> who awarded anything at
> all
> > to these morons--who deserved NOTHING!!!!
> >
> >
> > The following are this year's candidates:
> >
> > Kathleen Robertson of Austin, Texas, was awarded
> $780,000 by a jury of her
> > peers after breaking her ankle tripping over a
> toddler who was running
> > inside a furniture store. The owners of the
> store were understandably
> > surprised at the verdict, considering the
> misbehaving little toddler was
> > Ms. Robertson's son.
> >
> > -----------------
> > A 19-year-old Carl Truman of Los Angeles won
> $74,000 and medical expenses
> >
> > when his neighbor ran over his hand with a Honda
> Accord. Mr. Truman
> > apparently didn't notice there was someone at the
> wheel of the car when
> he
> > was trying to steal his neighbor's hubcaps.
> >
> > -----------------
> >
> > Terrence Dickson of Bristol, Pennsylvania, was
> leaving a house he had just
> > finished robbing by way of the garage. He was not
> able to get the garage
> > door to go up since the automatic door opener was
> malfunctioning. He
> > couldn't re-enter the house because the door
> connecting the house and
> > garage locked when he
> > pulled it shut. The family was on vacation, and
> Mr. Dickson found himself
> > locked in the garage for eight days. He subsisted
> on a case of Pepsi he
> > found, and a large bag of dry dog food. He sued
> the homeowner's
> insurance
> > claiming the situation caused him undue mental
> anguish.
> >
> > The jury agreed, to the tune of $500,000.
> >
> > & nbsp;-----------------
> >
> > Jerry Williams of Little Rock, Arkansas, was
> awarded $14,500 and medical
> > expenses after being bitten on the buttocks by his
> next door neighbor's
> > beagle. The beagle was on a chain in its owner's
> fenced yard. The award
> > was less than sought because the jury felt the
> dog might have been just a
> > little provoked at the time by Mr. Williams who
> was shooting it
> repeatedly
> > with a pellet gun.
> >
> > -----------------
> >
> > A Philadelphia restaurant was ordered to pay Amber
> Carson of Lancaster,
> > Pennsylvania, $113,500 after she slipped on a soft
> drink and broke her
> > coccyx! (tailbone). The beverage was on the
> floor because Ms. Carson had
> > thrown it at her
> > boyfriend 30 seconds earlier during an argument.
> >
> > -----------------
> >
> > Kara Walton of Claymont, Delaware, successfully
> sued the owner of a night
> > club in a neighboring city when she fell from the
> bathroom window to the
> > floor and knocked out her two front teeth. ;
> This occurred while Ms.
> > Walton was trying to sneak through the window in
> the ladies room to avoid
> > paying the $3.50 cover charge. She was awarded
> $12,000 and dental
> expenses.
> >
> > -----------------
> >
> > This year's favorite could easily be Mr. Merv
> Grazinski of Oklahoma City,
> > Oklahoma. Mr. Grazinski purchased a brand new
> 32-foot Winnebago motor
> home.
> > On his first trip home, having driven onto the
> freeway, he set the cruise
> > control at 70 mph and calmly left the driver's
> seat to go into the back
> and
> > make himself a cup of coffee. Not surprisingly,
> the RV left the freeway,
> > crashed and overturned. Mr. Grazinski sued
> Winnebago for not advising
> him
> > in the owner's manual that he couldn't actually
> do this. The jury
> awarded
> > him $1,750,000 plus a new motor home.
> >
> > The company actually changed their manuals on the
> basis of this suit, just
> > in case there were any other complete morons
> >
>
It's time once again to consider the candidates
> for the 2003 Stella
> Awards.
> > The Stellas are named after 81-year-old Stella
> Liebeck who spilled coffee
> > on herself and successfully sued McDonalds. That
> case inspired the
> Stella
> > Awards for the most uniquely successful tort
> lawsuits in the United
> States
> > for last year. Actually, joint awards should be
> given to the plaintiff
> > attorneys and the flaming idiots on the juries
> who awarded anything at
> all
> > to these morons--who deserved NOTHING!!!!
> >
> >
> > The following are this year's candidates:
> >
> > Kathleen Robertson of Austin, Texas, was awarded
> $780,000 by a jury of her
> > peers after breaking her ankle tripping over a
> toddler who was running
> > inside a furniture store. The owners of the
> store were understandably
> > surprised at the verdict, considering the
> misbehaving little toddler was
> > Ms. Robertson's son.
> >
> > -----------------
> > A 19-year-old Carl Truman of Los Angeles won
> $74,000 and medical expenses
> >
> > when his neighbor ran over his hand with a Honda
> Accord. Mr. Truman
> > apparently didn't notice there was someone at the
> wheel of the car when
> he
> > was trying to steal his neighbor's hubcaps.
> >
> > -----------------
> >
> > Terrence Dickson of Bristol, Pennsylvania, was
> leaving a house he had just
> > finished robbing by way of the garage. He was not
> able to get the garage
> > door to go up since the automatic door opener was
> malfunctioning. He
> > couldn't re-enter the house because the door
> connecting the house and
> > garage locked when he
> > pulled it shut. The family was on vacation, and
> Mr. Dickson found himself
> > locked in the garage for eight days. He subsisted
> on a case of Pepsi he
> > found, and a large bag of dry dog food. He sued
> the homeowner's
> insurance
> > claiming the situation caused him undue mental
> anguish.
> >
> > The jury agreed, to the tune of $500,000.
> >
> > & nbsp;-----------------
> >
> > Jerry Williams of Little Rock, Arkansas, was
> awarded $14,500 and medical
> > expenses after being bitten on the buttocks by his
> next door neighbor's
> > beagle. The beagle was on a chain in its owner's
> fenced yard. The award
> > was less than sought because the jury felt the
> dog might have been just a
> > little provoked at the time by Mr. Williams who
> was shooting it
> repeatedly
> > with a pellet gun.
> >
> > -----------------
> >
> > A Philadelphia restaurant was ordered to pay Amber
> Carson of Lancaster,
> > Pennsylvania, $113,500 after she slipped on a soft
> drink and broke her
> > coccyx! (tailbone). The beverage was on the
> floor because Ms. Carson had
> > thrown it at her
> > boyfriend 30 seconds earlier during an argument.
> >
> > -----------------
> >
> > Kara Walton of Claymont, Delaware, successfully
> sued the owner of a night
> > club in a neighboring city when she fell from the
> bathroom window to the
> > floor and knocked out her two front teeth. ;
> This occurred while Ms.
> > Walton was trying to sneak through the window in
> the ladies room to avoid
> > paying the $3.50 cover charge. She was awarded
> $12,000 and dental
> expenses.
> >
> > -----------------
> >
> > This year's favorite could easily be Mr. Merv
> Grazinski of Oklahoma City,
> > Oklahoma. Mr. Grazinski purchased a brand new
> 32-foot Winnebago motor
> home.
> > On his first trip home, having driven onto the
> freeway, he set the cruise
> > control at 70 mph and calmly left the driver's
> seat to go into the back
> and
> > make himself a cup of coffee. Not surprisingly,
> the RV left the freeway,
> > crashed and overturned. Mr. Grazinski sued
> Winnebago for not advising
> him
> > in the owner's manual that he couldn't actually
> do this. The jury
> awarded
> > him $1,750,000 plus a new motor home.
> >
> > The company actually changed their manuals on the
> basis of this suit, just
> > in case there were any other complete morons
> >
>