Pam
08-25-2003, 03:52 PM
I just got these in an e-mail and they sure put a smile on my face. I hope you enjoy them as much as I did! :)
NUDITY
I was driving with my three young children one warm summer evening when a
woman in the convertible ahead of us stood up and waved. She was stark naked! As
I was reeling from the shock, I heard my 5-year-old shout from the back seat,
"Mom! That lady isn't wearing a seat belt!"
HONESTY
My son Zachary, 4, came screaming out of the bathroom to tell me he'd dropped
his toothbrush in the toilet. So I fished it out and threw it in the garbage.
Zachary stood there thinking for a moment, then ran to my bathroom and came
out with my toothbrush. He held it up and said with a charming little smile,
"We better throw this one out too then, 'cause it fell in the toilet a few days
ago.
POLICE
It was the end of the day when I parked my police van in front of the
station. As I gathered my equipment, my K-9 partner, Jake, was barking, and I saw a
little boy staring in at me. "Is that a dog you got back there?" he asked. "It
sure is," I replied. Puzzled, the boy looked at me and then towards the back
of the van. Finally he said, "What'd he do?"
ELDERLY
While working for an organization that delivers lunches to elderly shut-ins,
I used to take my 4-year-old daughter on my afternoon rounds. She was
unfailingly intrigued by the various appliances of old age, particularly the canes,
walkers and wheelchairs. One day I found her staring at a pair of false teeth
soaking in a glass. As I braced myself for the inevitable barrage of questions,
she merely turned and whispered, "The tooth fairy will never believe this!"
DRESS-UP
A little girl was watching her parents dress for a party. When she saw her
dad donning his tuxedo, she warned, "Daddy, you shouldn't wear that suit." "And
why not, darling?" "You know that it always gives you a headache the next
morning."
BIBLE
A little boy opened the big family bible. He was fascinated as he fingered
through the old pages. Suddenly, something fell out of the Bible. He picked up
the object and looked at it. What he saw was an old leaf that had been pressed
in between the pages. "Mama, look what I found," the boy called out." What
have you got there, dear?" With astonishment in the young boy's voice, he
answered, "I think it's Adam's underwear!"
NUDITY
I was driving with my three young children one warm summer evening when a
woman in the convertible ahead of us stood up and waved. She was stark naked! As
I was reeling from the shock, I heard my 5-year-old shout from the back seat,
"Mom! That lady isn't wearing a seat belt!"
HONESTY
My son Zachary, 4, came screaming out of the bathroom to tell me he'd dropped
his toothbrush in the toilet. So I fished it out and threw it in the garbage.
Zachary stood there thinking for a moment, then ran to my bathroom and came
out with my toothbrush. He held it up and said with a charming little smile,
"We better throw this one out too then, 'cause it fell in the toilet a few days
ago.
POLICE
It was the end of the day when I parked my police van in front of the
station. As I gathered my equipment, my K-9 partner, Jake, was barking, and I saw a
little boy staring in at me. "Is that a dog you got back there?" he asked. "It
sure is," I replied. Puzzled, the boy looked at me and then towards the back
of the van. Finally he said, "What'd he do?"
ELDERLY
While working for an organization that delivers lunches to elderly shut-ins,
I used to take my 4-year-old daughter on my afternoon rounds. She was
unfailingly intrigued by the various appliances of old age, particularly the canes,
walkers and wheelchairs. One day I found her staring at a pair of false teeth
soaking in a glass. As I braced myself for the inevitable barrage of questions,
she merely turned and whispered, "The tooth fairy will never believe this!"
DRESS-UP
A little girl was watching her parents dress for a party. When she saw her
dad donning his tuxedo, she warned, "Daddy, you shouldn't wear that suit." "And
why not, darling?" "You know that it always gives you a headache the next
morning."
BIBLE
A little boy opened the big family bible. He was fascinated as he fingered
through the old pages. Suddenly, something fell out of the Bible. He picked up
the object and looked at it. What he saw was an old leaf that had been pressed
in between the pages. "Mama, look what I found," the boy called out." What
have you got there, dear?" With astonishment in the young boy's voice, he
answered, "I think it's Adam's underwear!"