Cataholic
08-25-2003, 01:50 PM
>
Does it get any better than this???
Dr. Laura Schlessinger is a US radio personality who
> dispenses advice to people who call in to her radio
> show. Recently, she said that, as an observant
> Orthodox Jew, homosexuality is an abomination
> according to Leviticus 18:22, and cannot be condoned
> under any circumstance.
>
> The following is an open letter to Dr. Laura penned by
> a US resident, which was posted on the Internet. It's
> funny, as well as informative:
>
> Dear Dr. Laura:
>
> Thank you for doing so much to educate people
> regarding God's Law. I have learned a great deal from
> your show, and try to share that knowledge with as
> many people as I can. When someone tries to defend the
> homosexual lifestyle, for example, I simply remind
> them that Leviticus 18:22 clearly states it to be an
> abomination. End of debate. I do need some advice from
> you, however, regarding some of the other specific
> laws and how to follow them.
>
> 1. When I burn a bull on the altar as a sacrifice, I
> know it creates a pleasing odor for the Lord -
> Lev.1:9. The problem is my neighbors. They claim the
> odor is not pleasing to them. Should I smite them?
>
> 2. I would like to sell my daughter into slavery, as
> sanctioned in Exodus 21:7. In this day and age, what
> do you think would be a fair price for her?
>
> 3. I know that I am allowed no contact with any woman
> while she is in her period of menstrual cleanliness -
> Lev.15:19-24. The problem is, how do I tell? I have
> tried asking, but most women take offense.
>
> 4. Lev. 25:44 states that I may indeed possess slaves,
> both male and female, provided they are purchased from
> neighboring nations. A friend of mine claims that this
> applies to Mexicans, but not Canadians. Can you
> clarify? Why can't I own Canadians?
>
> 5. I have a neighbor who insists on working on the
> Sabbath. Exodus 35:2 clearly states he should be put
> to death. Am I morally obligated to kill him myself?
>
> 6. A friend of mine feels that even though eating
> shellfish is an abomination - Lev. 11:10, it is a
> lesser abomination than homosexuality. I don't agree.
> Can you settle this?
>
> 7. Lev. 21:20 states that I may not approach the altar
> of God if I have a defect in my sight. I have to admit
> that I wear reading glasses. Does my vision have to be
> 20/20, or is there some wiggle room here?
>
> 8. Most of my male friends get their hair trimmed,
> including the hair around their temples, even though
> this is expressly forbidden by Lev. 19:27. How should
> they die?
>
> 9. I know from Lev. 11:6-8 that touching the skin of a
> dead pig makes me unclean, but may I still play
> football if I wear gloves?
>
> 10. My uncle has a farm. He violates Lev. 19:19 by
> planting two different crops in the same field, as
> does his wife by wearing garments made of two
> different kinds of thread (cotton/polyester blend). He
> also tends to curse and blaspheme a lot. Is it really
> necessary that we go to all the trouble of getting the
> whole town together to stone them? - Lev.24:10-16.
> Couldn't we just burn them to death at a private
> family affair like we do with people who sleep with
> their in-laws? (Lev. 20:14)
>
> I know you have studied these things extensively, so I
> am confident you can help. Thank you for reminding us
> that God's word is eternal and unchanging.
>
> Your devoted disciple and adoring fan.
Does it get any better than this???
Dr. Laura Schlessinger is a US radio personality who
> dispenses advice to people who call in to her radio
> show. Recently, she said that, as an observant
> Orthodox Jew, homosexuality is an abomination
> according to Leviticus 18:22, and cannot be condoned
> under any circumstance.
>
> The following is an open letter to Dr. Laura penned by
> a US resident, which was posted on the Internet. It's
> funny, as well as informative:
>
> Dear Dr. Laura:
>
> Thank you for doing so much to educate people
> regarding God's Law. I have learned a great deal from
> your show, and try to share that knowledge with as
> many people as I can. When someone tries to defend the
> homosexual lifestyle, for example, I simply remind
> them that Leviticus 18:22 clearly states it to be an
> abomination. End of debate. I do need some advice from
> you, however, regarding some of the other specific
> laws and how to follow them.
>
> 1. When I burn a bull on the altar as a sacrifice, I
> know it creates a pleasing odor for the Lord -
> Lev.1:9. The problem is my neighbors. They claim the
> odor is not pleasing to them. Should I smite them?
>
> 2. I would like to sell my daughter into slavery, as
> sanctioned in Exodus 21:7. In this day and age, what
> do you think would be a fair price for her?
>
> 3. I know that I am allowed no contact with any woman
> while she is in her period of menstrual cleanliness -
> Lev.15:19-24. The problem is, how do I tell? I have
> tried asking, but most women take offense.
>
> 4. Lev. 25:44 states that I may indeed possess slaves,
> both male and female, provided they are purchased from
> neighboring nations. A friend of mine claims that this
> applies to Mexicans, but not Canadians. Can you
> clarify? Why can't I own Canadians?
>
> 5. I have a neighbor who insists on working on the
> Sabbath. Exodus 35:2 clearly states he should be put
> to death. Am I morally obligated to kill him myself?
>
> 6. A friend of mine feels that even though eating
> shellfish is an abomination - Lev. 11:10, it is a
> lesser abomination than homosexuality. I don't agree.
> Can you settle this?
>
> 7. Lev. 21:20 states that I may not approach the altar
> of God if I have a defect in my sight. I have to admit
> that I wear reading glasses. Does my vision have to be
> 20/20, or is there some wiggle room here?
>
> 8. Most of my male friends get their hair trimmed,
> including the hair around their temples, even though
> this is expressly forbidden by Lev. 19:27. How should
> they die?
>
> 9. I know from Lev. 11:6-8 that touching the skin of a
> dead pig makes me unclean, but may I still play
> football if I wear gloves?
>
> 10. My uncle has a farm. He violates Lev. 19:19 by
> planting two different crops in the same field, as
> does his wife by wearing garments made of two
> different kinds of thread (cotton/polyester blend). He
> also tends to curse and blaspheme a lot. Is it really
> necessary that we go to all the trouble of getting the
> whole town together to stone them? - Lev.24:10-16.
> Couldn't we just burn them to death at a private
> family affair like we do with people who sleep with
> their in-laws? (Lev. 20:14)
>
> I know you have studied these things extensively, so I
> am confident you can help. Thank you for reminding us
> that God's word is eternal and unchanging.
>
> Your devoted disciple and adoring fan.