I have a confession to make, some sad news, and some (I am praying) hopefully good

[luckies4me]

I have neglected to post about this for several reasons. One, I was not sure I could gather up all the emotions and have the post make since, two, I was just having a very hard time trying not to focus on this, and three, I couldn't let go.....I tried believe me, but I couldn't. I have finally excepted what has happened, as hard as that was to do, and overcome the emotion enough to post. I am thankful I have a young son, and other pets to take my mind off of her.


We lost Morgan. About a month ago. I didn't say anything because I couldn't. When I said I would post pics of her, I didn't because I couldn't take any. She passed away, peacefully in our arms at the hospital. I know I should have said something sooner, but I am one of those people who do not know how to react to death. I am unsure whether to feel sad, mad, I just feel like nothing. I can't cry no matter how hard I try or want to. I am just blank, like I have no emotion at all. I am in shock. Yesterday was the first day I actually cried over Morgan. I cried for my girl, who was only with us but a few months. She was taken away as quickly as she came.

So I am sorry that I pretended to keep her alive all this time. I shouldn't have done that, but it was the only way I could feel connected to her. :( I never got to take those fantanstic pictures of her with my new camera. She would have LOVED to have her face spred all over the internet lol. That was my girl, she was always craving attention. :D We have found so many new trails this summer, and traveled them alone without her beside us, tail wagging and begging for a cookie. She loved to steal Dylans cookies, lol. She was obsessed with food, loved anything and everything!

She was feeling pretty awful, and when they opened her up there was nothing they could do. We drove to the hospital while she was still under anesthesia, held her head, and kissed her goodbye. We didn't want to wake her up, and felt that the best thing would be for her to go peacefully, while already asleep, not knowing what happened. I know she heard us though, because her ears perked up. I am hoping she crossed the bridge peacefully, without pain, feeling happy. :(

I just feel so bad that I didn't say anything sooner. But I just couldn't. It had beena long time since I had a dog of my own, and my heart went out to her. She was perfect in every way. Such a sweet, gentle, kind soul. She was meant for us, for our family. She came to us for a reason. Perhaps to help me along while I was here dealing with everything else in my life, Morgan took my mind off things. She got me outside, to walk and run and hike. To take Dylan to the park.

So with this post I am now saying goodbye to my girl. May you rest in peace Morgan, silly girl. You brought such good times to me, to our family. I will never forget you, ever. You will always have a place in my heart. I miss you girl and hope you wait for me.


Now that this is out, I also wanted to let you know about a possible new addition. I couldn't help it really. I need another pup, and this girl may just be it. I am hoping so very badly because the situation she is in is not a good one. We have new neighbors next door, they had two puppies. One a boy and one a girl, both from the same litter. I am assuming they are German Shep. mixes. They are pretty young, around a three months old?

I will continue in another post.....

[WestieKisses]

Aw, Cass...I am sooooo sorry. :( She sounds like she was such a great friend to you, and certainly a sweetie. There is no reason to feel guilty or worried about not saying something sooner...death is difficult to accept, and everyone deals with it in different ways. You obviously gave her a great life, and her last moments were spent with you, in the best place possible...in the arms of someone who loves her.

I, too, know the pain of losing such a wonderful companion. Anytime you need to talk, I'll be here. Feel free to PM whenever you want...I can't make the pain go away, but I can certainly offer a shoulder to cry on. :)

[luckies4me]

Well their owners are college guys, who are very busy. We have no backyards here, so the dogs are either tied up outside on a very short leash, or kept inside all day with no supervision or attention. One day they left, and left the puppies tied out back. They were out there in 100 degree weather, and the leash was so short they couldn't reach their water bowl. I was hearing yelp after yelp after yelp when I finally couldn't take it anymore and went outside. One puppy had got loose and was wandering the driveway, which is very dangerous for such a young puppy, especially since there is a creek out front and they could have drowned or got caught in the chain thing that covers the water hole. So I scooped her up and tied them back up, this time making their lead a little longer. I scooted their water by them and filled it with ice cubes, and poured them some puppy food I sometimes use for the rats.


There was hardly any shade. I also threw some balls and stuff out there so they could have something to do. Well the owners came home and I knocked on their door. The guys was pissed because I gave his dog water (moron) and a ball. I told him that he shouldn't have his dogs tied up to such a short leash as they could not even reach their water bowl. (am I spelling bowl right, how is it, bowel or bowl lol...)

Well after they talked to me for a bit they calmed down and said thanks for saving the wandering puppy. I had some Frontline leftover here so I split one tube on the puppies, and gave the owners the rest. I also gave them some puppy food and some toys/biscutes. The guy said that he ties them up when he goes to school. Oh yes, and they also hit the poor dogs. He was calling the little girl (the one we might take) over, and when she didn't listen he smacked her. :( :mad:

I am trying my hardest to get this guy to give her up, and I think it might be working. I now "babysit" her on the days I am home, while he goes to school. Her brother no longer lives with her, but in another apartment on the other side of our units. His owner is doing a great job with the boy, taking him for walks daily, obedience classes etc. But this guy is driving me mad. You cannot keep a puppy cooped up in a small apartment all day with no excercise. She's not even being trained.

But I am trying my hardest to get him to give her to us, since she's here most of the time anyway. :rolleyes: Dylan loves her, and Ewok actually tolerates her lol. The other kitties don't exactly know what to think of a small puppy, as they have only been around bigger dogs. They think she's a weird looking cat lol.

So please pray that I can get this moron to let her go, so she can get more attention to be with a family that deserves her! One that won't abuse and hit her! :mad:

I have several pics of her.....I will upload them now. Here is one though to tidy you guys over. Note the depressed look on her face...I can only imagine what goes on when she's not with me.

http://www.imagestation.com/picture/sraid74/p256c94ae71cfa019c213459b55fb93c9/fb65d4d9.jpg

[primabella]

Cass, I had no idea. I am so very, very sorry. She sounds like she was a wonderful friend. I understand why you did not post about this before and my heart is breaking for you. Hopefully Morgan will be sending you the perfect pup to take care of.

*hugs*

RIP sweet Morgan

[primabella]

Oh what morons this poor girl is stuck with! :mad: How irresponsible. She is gorgeous and I am praying that he will give her up.

Keep us updated. :)

[Aspen and Misty]

O Cass ::hugs:: I know exactly what you mean about loosing a dog and all the emotions that come along with it and also wanting another one ::hugs::


May she rest in peace sweet baby.

I hope that you can rescue her!!


Ash

[DoggiesAreTheBest]

I am so sorry to hear about your loss, Cass. I know that it hurts and just reading your post made me cry. Morgan sounds like a wonderful pup and she will live on through your fond memories of her.

Best of luck to you with the new pup. She looks adorable. Caramel dipped in chocolate on both ends (her snout and tail).

[ChrisH]

I am so very sorry to hear about Morgan.
Rest in Peace sweet girl. :(
Hugs

Good luck with the poor little pup, she looks adorable.

[luckies4me]

Thanks everyone. :( I miss her so bad! It sucks. I even miss her burps. She always burped lol, whenever she ate, and she was LOUD. lol If I didn't adopt her I don't know if I would have ever had the company of another dog again. She changed everything!

Here are some older pics of the puppy....sorry the house isn't clean. :o But the second pic shows how she spent about a month of her life, until I started watching her while her owners were gone.

http://www.imagestation.com/picture/sraid74/p612aac10e3a0660ed36df402cd00f8c2/fb65a415.jpg

Here are the two of them, the boy and girl........she doesn't have a name yet, and I do not know if they have even named her. :rolleyes:

http://www.imagestation.com/picture/sraid74/pb8f967645209ce51978daecd350bf500/fb65a412.jpg

[luckies4me]

Here are some more pics:


Here is Ewok and Caramel??? ;)

http://www.imagestation.com/picture/sraid74/p86908b308a248dded0e0c23a0fe313f9/fb659a8e.jpg

This pic is funny lol.

http://www.imagestation.com/picture/sraid74/p09eaa7b5a966cd1a87ecd934d2e5136e/fb659a8b.jpg

She looks so depressed right here, poor girl. But so cute. She is sleeping in the cat's bed. :)

http://www.imagestation.com/picture/sraid74/pa087d59aa0b9a4e38bc4cabb4ad93ef6/fb659a8a.jpg

[magcpen]

Your post made me come thisclose to crying. I'm so sorry. I think that this puppy will be a great new addition, and I'm sure she loves you to pieces already. :)

R.I.P. Morgan :(

[4 Dog Mother]

I am sorry you lost Morgan but don't feel bad that it took you so long to "confess". Everyone deals with death differently and no one can criticize how you handle things.

Carmel (love that name) is adorable and I hope things work out that you can keep her.

[GSDgurl]

Ohhh..... im soo sorry to hear about poor lil' Morgan Cass. I understand what you mean when your not emotional or you have no emotions when it comes to thing like that.....it takes me a day or two...to really realize what really happened....n' that they are gone now.

I hope that this "moron" does give that puppy up to you. I know you would give a great home. N' the name Carmel is cute for her..;)

R.I.P sweet Morgan....

[KYS]

I am so sorry to hear about Morgan.
Everybody handles death differently, and no
need to explain yourself to us.
I hope all works out with you, the pup is adorbale.
Hugs Karen

[sabies]

So sorry to hear about Morgan. I understand how you feel about not being able to say anything. There's no easy way to handle it.

The pup is absolutely adorable. I hope he will give it to you.

[Logan]

Cass, I'm so sorry to hear about Morgan. She was a beautiful Golden girl. I hate that I can't remember her story......how you got her, but I do remember seeing her pictures. I'm glad that you did what you did with that beautiful puppy. Please keep us posted about what happens with her.

Logan

[wolf_Q]

I'm sorry to hear what happened. :( Maybe I just didn't read it right, but I didn't understand what happened to her? I thought she was pretty young and in good health.....:( Rest in peace, Morgan.

[wolfsoul]

I'm sorry about Morgan. She was a special girl. :( She had the same golden face that Timber has, always reminded me of her.

I hope that you can get this puppy. Maybe when they are gone you can call animal control to see their conditions? No shelter, shade and water are all signs of abuse and they'll take her and her brother right away. :)

[carole]

I am terribly sad to hear of your loss of Morgan, everyone deals with death in a different way, and I am glad you are able to tell us now, as it will help the healing process in your grieving.

I really hope you can get that gorgeous puppy, yes puppy looks very sad, it distressed me to see that sad lil face. Good luck and take care, HUGS TO YOU.

:)

[luckies4me]

Originally posted by wolf_Q
I'm sorry to hear what happened. :( Maybe I just didn't read it right, but I didn't understand what happened to her? I thought she was pretty young and in good health.....:( Rest in peace, Morgan.


She was very young, and not young enough to go. :( She had so much more life in her. She had intestinal cancer. It was pretty bad. She was fine and then all of a sudden she started vomiting a lot. She stopped eating etc. She went from happy and looking great to not doing anything. What's sad is that she used to weigh around 100 pounds, which is big. Well we put her on a diet and she dropped down to 80, but now I think it was from the cancer. I wish I would have done something sooner, but there was no way to know until it was too late. The shelter said she was 4 years old, but Dr. Barrett suspects she was a little older. Even still, too young to leave. :( I miss her so much, and the sad thing is that a few days ago Dylan said her name. Dylan doesn't talk much, but he said her name. It blew me away. I think he misses her and wants to know where she went. :( I do not know how to explain to him that she passed, and won't be comming back. He's not even 2 years yet, will be this November, but I sense he knows something is amess. It breaks my heart. She had so much more love to give. I just hope that there really is a place where our pets go, because if not, if there are no pets in heaven, then I don't want to go there.

[wolfsoul]

Awww :( My aunt had a golden retriever who also passed from intestinal problems. Only her golden died from the bacteria that accumulated inside her. It was from the BARF diet. :( That's another reason I hate that diet so much, it killed Brandy.

I'm so sorry to hear that she had cancer. Leather has cancer as well. :(

[RubyMutt]

This is all so sad :( My heart is breaking for you. I'm so sorry you lost your sweet Morgan, and I'm sorry you have to put up with moronic neighbors. Thank you for standing up to them and helping those pups. Caramel is gorgeous - I love those big ears :) I hope she can eventually stay with you full time :)

RIP beautiful Morgan :(

[Karen]

I remember when you got Morgan, and I thought it was good of you to take an adult dog, which so many might have neglected. AT least her last months were in a place where she was loved, fed, and just plain adored.

She'll live forever in your heart.

[shais_mom]

I was just wondering about Morgan the other day. I am glad I didn't ask you and bring up bad memories. Poor Girl..
She was a sweetheart, and will always know that she was loved in your home.
That puppy is adorable!!! I hope you can get her too!!!
RIP Morgan.

[K9karen]

Oh Cass, I'm so very sorry to read about Morgan... My Cody got sick very suddenly also. I later realized it was best that way so he wouldn't suffer badly. Please, please don't apologize for not writing sooner. Everybody deals with sadness in their own way. There's no right or wrong to it. It's how you are. Sometimes it's so shocking, that you can't even respond to it right away-your emotions are in limbo. You needed your own time. You have my deepest sympathies. I know that Morgan is watching over all of you, esp; Dylan, his little buddy.... What an expressive face on that puppy! Those eyes! So big and sad..My jaw just dropped at those kids reaction to your kindness. These are the people the HSUS whould investigate and arrest! Maybe if you explain that Dylan already loves the dog, they'll let you rescue her...What about the male?? These are the formative months.. I hope it's not too late! Good luck, dear.

[luckies4me]

Thank you everyone. :( I was so afraid to come here and post this thread, knowing that all these emotions will flood me. Now I find myself just sad, wanting to cry all the time. Is that normal? I do not want Dylan to think something is wrong with mommy, but I cannot help it. First I was numb and couldn't do anything, now I can't stop! I just do not understand why things like this happen, it's just not fair this way. :( Look at me, I sound like a child. *sigh*


Tomorrow I would like to post pics of Morgan that I never posted before. I hope that is ok. I know she would want people to see her cute face! :)


As far as the puppy, the HS said that as long as they have food and water, and it isn't raining there isn't much they can do. :( I don't understand why they have these laws if they do not enforce them? It makes no sense to me.

We have another neighbor, in one of the houses here, who had a dog that they kept outside all the time. Well she got lose one day, (what a sweet dog, Dylan loved her) and was running everywhere. I took her back home and put her in her kennel but she got out again. I went into the neighbors backyard (you can just walk right in, not too smart if you have a dog) and there was no food, just wated, and hay on the floor. Hay is not shelter! They did nothing, even though she cried all the time. I left a nasty note on the door, as the dog was not licensed. Grr. :mad:

Well the other day I looked over the fence and I noticed that that dog was gone, and they had two new dogs, which looked like shelties. :rolleyes: I did notice that they made the fence closed, which is good. But these dogs, like the last have no id or license. People like this just drive me insane.


The male puppy is in good hands. :) His owner seems very caring and compassionate. Dylan and the boy puppy had a romp in the grass the other day, which was neat. The puppy was so cute, creaping to "attack" Dylan lol. I just hope I can convince them to give her up. Hitting is going to cause problems, possibly agression and that's not good. :( You can tell she is a depressed little girl, poor thing. Even when she is here, she cries. I know she misses her brother as well. They hardly see eachother now. Well I rambled on for way too long. Thank you everyone for all the kinds words. I really appreciate it. It makes me feel so much better knowing there are people out there who care.

[pitc9]

oh....I am so sorry to hear about the troubles in your life right now, I wish there was a way to just snap my fingers and make the hurt of loosing Morgan, if I knew a way, I would!

As for the little girl....I pray for her!!

[Albea]

So sorry about your news,Cass. If you can, think of Morgan running, happy and healthy, with her new friends at the Rainbow Bridge. I know how difficult it is to loose such a beloved friend.
I hope that your stupid neighbor decides to give you that lovely puppy and that the next time you post her picture she'll have a big smile in her face, instead of that sad look that breaks my heart.
Good luck and, please, let us know if you can rescue the pup.

[ramanth]

So sorry to hear about Morgan. :(

I do hope things work out for you with the little puppy. :)

[dukedogsmom]

I can only imagine the loss you are feeling. I'm sorry you didn't get any pictures. We are all sad about this. And that poor little puppy looks so sad. I hope you can get her away from that creep. People like that don't deserve the great love that animal(especially dogs) can give.