Miley girl had a BAD, BAD day!

[sasvermont]

When I left for work yesterday, I let Miley have the run of 1/2 of the house, behind two closed doors. Ti had the other half which is pretty standard these days. When I got home, one door on Miley's half was open, Miley was on the porch, hovered in a corner with poop and pee on her back end and side, she looked awful and scared to death. She let me pick her up and I took her directly to the bathtub for a bath. Ti was asleep somewhere in the house. There was fur all over the porch and I couldn't really tell who's it was, as they both have the same colored fur. I haven't found any wounds on either of them. To make a long story short, Miley is really scared of Ti now. I think I am going to have to put her on some sort of drug, to calm her down. What a mess.

She looked and acted so scared this morning as I was leaving. I made sure the doors were securely closed.

I am seriously thinking about returning Ti. Cats!

[HayleyRosie]

I am so sorry to hear about Miley's bad experience. I would love to hear that her and Ti are getting along and love each other. I know you will do what is best for both of your furbabies. I will pray for you, Miley and Ti. Please keep us posted on their progress.

[Pam]

Oh my, poor precious little Miley! It's times like these that it would be nice to have a video camera playing at home in order to see what goes on when the humans are away. I am afraid that things must have really gotten out of hand this time. Coming home to that must have certainly shaken you up too!!! Thank goodness there were no signs of injury or any bleeding. My two can really toss the fur when they get doing their rolypoly antics but this sounds a little scary to me, certainly not even rough play, but probably an outright cat fight. :( Maybe you might just want to call Ti's breeder and let them know what has been going on just in case, worst case scenario, that things get even worse with the arrival of Juni. One really needs to have the wisdom of Solomon to handle feuding felines. I am afraid I am totally lacking in experience in that area, but do wish you well with whatever path you have to take. I know you are feeling so torn right now. :( :(

[sasvermont]

I emailed the breeder a while back and let her know what was going on. She portrayed Ti as being a non-alpha kitty. Well, that just isn't true. He isn't violent, but he does want to be king. Gabe was mean sometimes, but he knew his place in the house pecking order and stuck with the program. I think that is why he worked out so nicely. Ti, on the other hand is trying to be king and Miley just won't stand for it.

When I emailed the breeder, her response was "well, he was rough with his roommate Aby girl cat but she was rough right back..."....which doesn't give me much hope for the kitten.

I will keep a close eye on the kitten and if I sense that Ti is being too rough, bye bye Ti. I love him, and he loves me now, but I have to live in my house with some peace. If he doesn't learn to back down, then he will have to go!

He is a highly desired kitty, and pretty darn flexible, so I think he would adjust to a new house quickly, as he did mine, for the most part.

I want peace in my house, not what I have now.

One and one half more months.....
:eek:

[Pam]

I feel so bad for you with what you are going through now. When I got Ripley I was sooooo concerned that he would be a 'cat chaser.' I can't say that he doesn't try it now and then but he responds very well to NO! Even when he does catch up with them he doesn't do anything but I just wanted everything to remain as peaceful as it was before so I was very anxious about how he would do.

Your breeder sounds a little more receptive than Gabe's breeder. The people who Robyn got Gabe from tried to return him when their son supposedly developed allergies. The breeder would not even consider taking him back, and Gabe was still only maybe 10 weeks old at the time. :confused: We thought that was VERY odd. I know if I bred any animal I would most certainly want it back if it didn't work out with the new owners.

Here's hoping it doesn't come to that, but you have to do what you have to do for Miley's sake. This is very sad indeed but the thought of more fights is even worse. (((hugs)))

[Tubby & Peanut's Mom]

Originally posted by sasvermont
hovered in a corner with poop and pee on her back end and side, she looked awful and scared to death.

How horrible! And this is not good. The poop and pee means she really was scared to death and certainly not just faking it.:( Was it somewhat dried on her or did it look relatively "fresh?" Sorry to be so descriptive, but that would be a good indicator of just how long she had been huddled in the corner like that. And I wonder if that happened during the fight or if she was too scared to leave the corner? :(

I'm sooo sorry you are having to go through this SAS. :( Even though Miley might be a little bit of a prima donna, she was there first, and most certainly doesn't deserve this - poor kitty. :(

It's easy for me to talk because I haven't been there and bonded with Ti, but he doesn't seem to be trying to fit in at all, and seems to be wearing out his welcome a bit. :( I feel bad for him, but like you say, he would probably get along anywhere.

I sure hope there are no more incidences like this, but at least you know now how rough he can be so you can keep an extra eye on him with the kitten. If Miley was that scared, I'd hate to see what he'd do with a kitten. :(

Hugs to you SAS, and to little Miley girl too, but none for the big bully Ti, who is definitely in the doghouse now.

(Gee, guess my loyalties are with Miley also, I feel so bad for her even though she can be a little...witchy...sometimes. A little swat here and there, or a little spat now and then, but she does not deserve this. :( )

[shais_mom]

Poor Miley and poor you!
Have you tried rescue remedy?
I think that is what Kimmy and Kelly are using.
Good Luck!

[Edwina's Secretary]

Oh Ti....PLEASE be a good boy and be friends with Miley. She has had a rough time of it.

I think you are sooooooo gorgeous.....please, please, please behave!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?

[PayItForward]

Hurry up June & Juni Rose.
Maybe the third cat will help.
It did in our house, though things are tougher at yours.

Thinking of you.

[sasvermont]

T & P's Mom: it was fairly fresh and it looked as though she had just continued to sit frozen at the cat door (that was locked shut)...although the porch door was wide open. Miley was accustomed to using the cat door and I had locked it so they would not use it when I was least expecting them to....... and she must have been too scared to use the regular porch door that was quite a distance from the cat door. Poor baby. She had a frantic look in her eyes. By the time we went to bed, she had decided it was safe enough to come down from the closet shelf and cuddle with me.

Ti is so lovable. I just don't get it. He has NEVER made an attempt to scratch me, or bite me or get away when I clip his nails etc. I really do think the problem is Miley and he just adds insult to injury! Ugh. I am sick from it. I cannot live this way!

:mad:

[slick]

SAS I'm soooo sorry you are having such trouble. I've never been in that situation so I'm afraid I cannot offer much advice. Just know that you are in my thoughts and prayers. I pray that things get better for you all! I feel so bad for all of you. I can't imagine living with that much fighting.

[lailamara]

SAS I'm so sorry that things are so difficult. You will do what's best for everyone's saftey and happiness (yours too). Aby females are rather high-strung (I've only had two ). She may just not be able to adjust , but here's hoping for a breakthrough. I've got some cat behaviour books that I'll look through and if there is anything helpful i'll PM you.

[catland]

That's so sad, but you're right that Ti just might not be the right cat to co-exist with Miley. There are plenty of passive, gentle kitties out there who are not at all agressive (my sweet Joxer is one of them)

good luck - it must be so trying.:(

[catlady1945]

Some households are better with just a single animal. Cats are very territorial and there is nothing wrong with just having one rather than adopting and then unadopting.

[jenluckenbach]

This is such a sad situation. I have no advice. I have never had a cat not adjust. Best of luck whatever you decide.

[NoahsMommy]

Oh SAS,

I'm so sorry! :( Don't ignore your instincts if you feel Miley wont ever feel OK in her own home with Ti there. You have to think of the resident cat(s) first, its only fair.

I have a feeling it would be WAY different with a kitten, Miley could tell it who's boss.

Do what YOU think it right. We don't live with you and can't see what's going on. I can tell you are emotionally drained by this, as is Miley girl.

Take care,
Kelly

[lizbud]

SAS,

Poor Miley girl.:( How terrified she must have been. I feel
so sorry for her to have been found in such a state. :(
To be so badly affected, I'll bet she'll never forget the incident
either. I feel so bad for you both.

[rosethecopycat]

SAS,

After all you've been through...:(

Sometimes enough is enough. This would not be the worst thing for either kitties. We support you judgement.

Peace be on your house.

[Uabassoon]

Geez and I thought I had it bad in my house. My roommates cat HATES my cats. She growls and hisses and swats and they do have full on cats fights, usually her and Corkscrew. There have even been a few injuries, but thankfully neither of the cats have ever been that scared. Sasha just hates Corkscrew but she isn't afraid of him the way Miley seems to be. I really hope everything works out. Give Miley some head bumpies for me.

[krazyaboutkatz]

Sallyanne, I'm so sorry to hear about poor little Miley. :( I also agree that if something doesn't change soon that Ti will need to be rehomed. It just isn't fair for Miley to live in such a stressful environment. I sure hope that Juni will bring peace to both Miley and Ti and you'll finally have a happy ending. Prayers and positive thoughts are on the way.

[Barbara]

Sallyanne, how terrible to hear this. I also get my doubts whether there will be a solution for Ti and Miley. If he tries to dominate her -she has no chance -he is so much stronger.
But I doubt whether she can be happy again with him being so bossy.

I sometimes have the impression that purebred Abys as well as Bengals are very highstrung. So maybe a peaceful domestic kitty would be a better mix with Miley. It touches my heart to see her on this porch.

Filou is very courageous and Tigris is rather chickenhearted. This is part of the balance. If Tigris was all the time as aggressive as he can be in some moments, life would be hell for Filou.

On the other hand I am so sorry for Ti who has bonded to you.

{{{{{{hugs}}}}}} for Miley and you and Ti, too.

[Rachel]

Although my cat knowledge = zero, I have a feeling you are right about the need to rehome Ti. Even if the whole problem were Miley's attitude, she is the one whom you have to protect and defend. Thankfully, Ti is a cat who would be welcomed into many a home. Maybe he should be an only cat, more probably it is the individual dynamics between him and Miley that are the problem and he would adjust quite well to another home with cats. I wonder if you wouldn't be the better person to rehome him than the breeder?

[PayItForward]

Are you going to wait for Juni Rose, before rehoming Ti ?

Maybe a third cat, is all that is needed (with a lot of patience & settling in time)

Though I am far from knowing stuff about cats.

Hopeing things are sorted one way or another (4 weeks from June)

[marysmerrycats]

sasvermont
Im so sorry to hear about poor Miley! maybe you could call your vet ans ask about, there is a thing called feliway plug ins, and it is suposed to calm them down, we got it from our vet for Callie's peeing outside the box, but it could also work for making them calm and maybe getting along better, or at least not fighting... good luck:)

Miley Im sorry that you got so frightend sweet girl:(

[Pam]

Thinking of you today and hoping that Miley is having a better day. I guess you are playing referee today. :( (((hugs to all 3 of you)))

[sasvermont]

Well, I spent most of the day doing spring cleaning. Ti was out on the porch most of the day, by himself. Not a bad place to be for sure! Miley will not come out of the bedroom now. She is one scared kitty. I resorted to Gabe's old medication again. I put a tiny bit on her ear and will continue for a few days to see if it helps her. If it does, I will call my vet and get more. I will try to hold out for Juni, although some days I wonder if I will be adding more problems by getting another cat. What if Miley hates the kitten too? All of this is not life threatening so I shouldn't be doing too much worrying over it, huh?

I too have thought about rehoming him myself, rather than using the breeder. I will cross that bridge when I come to it. Right now neither cat is living in a single room. Both have plenty of room to roam and have me roaming both areas most of the time. It is actually easier on all of us to keep them apart, rather than hear the screaming and fighting if they meet!

What a mess.

Miley is fine, and cuddles with me each night, all night long and sleeps on my chest most nights......with her face tucked under my chin(s).... :p ...... She still grooms me in the morning!

I miss my old life, with Gabe and Grammy and Miley, all three happy campers. Oh well.

SAS:rolleyes:

[lizbud]

SAS,

Sending {{{{{HUGS}}}}} to you today. Hope you have
a calm, peaceful evening. :) :) Liz.

[L. Wayne]

Sally, it has been my experience with cats that getting a 3rd cat may not alleviate the problem. I have a similiar problem with Mopsy and Otis. Otis is definitely the ruler of the property and in the house. He darts outside, when I am not looking, and runs off all of my strays, and ferals and then comes back when he has done his "work". Otis and Mopsy do not get along, because Mopsy will not accept him. Although I have seen both of them tolerate each other, Mopsy appears to be afraid of him. I know that they will not eat out of the same tray. Sometimes I hear the loudest cat fight cries, and assume that Mopsy is being chased by Otis, which is usually the case. I doubt that either will accept each other, but as long as they do not constantly fight, I can put up with it.

........wayne

[PayItForward]

Three weeks to June & Juni.

Hoping things have calmed down for Miley & Ti :)

[Vermontcat]

SAS, sorry I didn't see this until now.
I hope things are calmer between Miley and Ti today. Poor Miley girl! I guess she got a big scare without you there to protect her.:(
Let me know if there is anything I can do to help, you can PM me.

[Vio&Juni]

So sorry to hear that about Miley :(
I wish I lived closer. I would take Ti if you'd decide to rehome him.

[HayleyRosie]

How are they doing today?

[sasvermont]

I wish I knew what was on Ti's mind! I really think he just wants to play with Miley, but he comes on too strong for her. She is still hiding from him. I have been giving her a sedative for the past three days - helps with her jumpiness. So, I am at a stand still. I let them in the same room but only when supervised and even then all fights can easily happen! It is not looking good in my opinion.

Thanks for asking!

:(

[Logan]

:( I'm so sorry, Sallyanne.

I'm sure I'm repeating myself here :o Sorry! But, Mimi is much like Miley and wants to be Queen of her castle. We had a kitten once, about 8 years ago, that we bottle fed and intended to keep. Having Dwayne totally changed Mimi's personality to the point where she wouldn't come near any of us. After several months of literally watching her suffer, I had to find Dwayne a new home. She was back to her old self immediately. Then came Butter two years ago. She was not so happy about that, but he was different than an exuberant kitten and he has learned to stay out of her way. They still get into it sometime (had blood on both of them last week, as a matter of fact), but for the most part, they stay separate by choice. When they do bump into each other, she hisses and fusses so much! :p

I can't help but wonder if Miley is ever going to accept another cat, adult or kitten, but she did come around with Gabe, so maybe there is hope.

You're in my thoughts, my friend. I just wish I had some good advice for you!

[Pam]

Sallyanne I think barring a miracle with the arrival of Juni you already know what is going to have to happen. This is very sad because Ti is gorgeous and I know anyone would love to have him. That said, I know finding a new home for him shouldn't be hard. :( I wish I could keep encouraging you, but I think the handwriting is on the wall. :( Poor Miley! :( Poor Ti! :( Poor SAS! :(

ps to Logan - Your new signature is terrific! ;)

[Logan]

ps to Logan - Your new signature is terrific! ;)

Thanks, Pam! Popcornbird made it for me as a surprise!! :) I'm very proud of it!!!

[sasvermont]

The breeder's response was that "Ti never had any problem with aggression with his roommate Bengal kitty, because she ruled the house".....and she was surprised he was being a bully now. Well, guess what, she had originally told me that Ti has roomed with an Aby cat all his life, which for me, is quite different. The fact that Ti had been raised with an Aby meant lots to me. So either the breeder is telling fibs or she has the cats mixed up a bit. Regardless, she said she would think of a solution.

I really think Ti will be returned. Miley was ok with Gabe and ok with a friend's cat that I baby sat for awhile. So although Miley is a little witch, she is also easily terrified of agressive cats, like Ti.

I think the breeder misrepresented Ti, saying he was not an Alpha cat. He is an Alpha, for sure!

Oh well, I will keep you guys posted and hope that Miley makes it through the next introduction.

Thanks for all your positive thoughts.

SAS and her two brats!:eek:

[Logan]

I can only wonder what it would be like if Butter and Ti met!! :eek: :eek: :eek: The more I think about it, Butter would probably turn into a pansy!!! :) After all, the six pound Mimi has put that 11 pound boy in his place on more than one occasion!!

Sallyanne, I know that whatever you decide, it will be in the best interest of all. I'm just sad that you have to make that decision because I know you love Ti. He is such a handsome boy, and in different circumstances would be the perfect cat. :)

[sasvermont]

I know that if Ti does leave me, he will find a good home. I didn't really know his breeder all that well. I didn't feel all that comfortable when dealing with her. I should have known better. If she will not rehome him, I will and I will keep him healthy and happy until then.

I think Ti needs to be king of the castle and he needs company too. He really is a sweet guy - but refuses to back down like Gabe did with Miley. Gabe did a "whatever" with Miley when she would start with him, disfusing the situation. Ti, on the other hand, likes to engage her in battle. It is horrible to witness.

I know I am not the only one to have lived through this problem and it isn't really that awful for either of them to be apart. They both have rooms to play in - and I often switch them around.

Oh well, owning cats can not always be fun for everyone!

Thanks again for your support!


:cool:

[Barbara]

Even from a distance one can see that Ti is a beautiful cat and there are bonds between you and him (the picture in front of your computer). I know it is not easy to decide to look for a new home for him. But on the other hand life does not seem relaxed for both cats and little Miley should have a chance to be a happy kitty again (although I don't think she remembers her brother that much).

There is a cute book from a lady called Antonia White "Minka and Curdy". It tells the story of a lady who had -after the death of her beloved cat- found a red boy kitty. Soon after she was offered her secret dram, a siamese cat. She tried to introduce them to each other and everything went badly until one day her dream came true: She was lying in bed with one kitty on her left shoulder and one on her right. I wish you that one day you will be that happy with Miley and another kitty:)

[kohala]

I admire you for trying. I caved in quickly years ago when I had a rescue for 2 weeks. She was a pretty little white with bits of orange long hair feral kitten, about 6 months. She was social with people and tolerant of Grasshopper, but Grasshopper developed some pretty wierd behavior. And the kitten, Monkey, would pee everywhere. It was almost impossible for me to train her to house rules, so she was adopted by someone else, and I have never really tried again. Depending on our living arangement when Grasshopper goes to Rainbow Bridge, I plan on making sure I adopt two together, at least. Although where we hope to be before her time is here, there are lots of outdoor cats, and I will probably be TNRing a lot of them, so may find my feline housemates there. It is sad about Ti and Miley, but they have personalities, also, and like people, some just don't "connect". I think you've done a wonderful job.

[lizbud]

SAS,

I'm sorry that Ti & Miley don't seem to be a good match. You
really seem to know a lot about cats. I mean different breeds
and the different charerteristics of the each breed. Perhaps
Ti did get along with another Bengal(female), but not an Aby.
I've only been acquainted with cats & cat behavior for about
5-6 years & they've all just been ones who just happened into
my life. I did not know anything about cats & did not seek them
out, so to speak. I know you can trust your knowledge & instincts
about cat behavior & make the right choice for Miley & for Ti.

After a little R & R from battles with Ti, Miley could settle down
again. I think she would more accepting of a kitten.At least she
would not be afraid of having it around.Miley might find a kitten
a mild amusement. Anyway, just wanted to wish you peace in
your house.:)

[krazyaboutkatz]

Sallyanne, I'm so sorry to hear that Ti and Miley are still not getting along and that Ti will need to be rehomed. :( I know that you did everything you could to try to bring them together but sometimes it just doesn't work out. I'm sure that gorgeous Ti will find another great home and I think that you should be the one to rehome him so his breeder doesn't misrepresent him again. Good luck and please keep us updated.

[HayleyRosie]

I'm so sorry to hear that Ti and Miley are still not getting along. I am a little sad to hear that Ti may have to be rehomed but I know you will make the right decision there. We have to do what is best for our furbabies so they are happy and healthy. I'm sure there will be no trouble finding a new forever home for Ti. Hopefully you will be able to get updates on him from his new owner if it comes to that. You will be in my thoughts.

[kimlovescats]

Sometimes it just doesn't work out .... plain and simple! Don't feel bad, guilty, and certainly not like you owe any of us an explanation!!!! Do what YOU feel you need to do! I know you have my support ... but not that you need it!!! ;)

[sasvermont]

Last night Ti was really, really sweet and fell asleep on my chest while I was watching Survivor. He is enjoying having Miley "put away" for the time being. Maybe time will heal the wounds....
I will probably end up keeping Ti until the kitten arrives, since I am in love with him to a great degree. I wish a neighbor would adopt him, so I could visit with him from time to time. He really is a funny cat. Last night he was chasing his tail, time after time. He is heavy on his feet, so it sounded like a hurd of elephants playing! He has a very high pitched meow almost like a baby crying. He sounds like a wild animal. From what I understand about the breed, he should be at least 7 generations removed from the 1/2 wild, 1/2 domesticated cats. I wonder................

Anyway, thanks for your support. It hasn't been fun for me keeping the cats apart and having that tension in the house, but it will pass, one way or the other!

Love to all and a great deal of thanks for your concerns!

Sas and her two bad kitties!:rolleyes:

[HayleyRosie]

I sure hope that when you get the new little kitten it will bring all three together. It could happen. Wishing you the best of luck.

[kohala]

As HayleyRosie just said, perhaps the new kitten will provide a little diversion that will eventually allow for some kind of truce?! I dearly hope so, as I know how hard it must be for you to have to "chose". My heart goes out to you, I can just picture you with Ti curled up on you, and I know it would be a great day if you could have them both cozily curled up with you. Here's a bunch of prayers and crossed fingers and paws thinking of all of you!

[carole]

Oh i do hope you can end up keeping Ti, he sounds so cute, but i know how hard it can be, my two are not the best of friends, but lexie trys so darn hard, and ash is just a grumpy old man, but its very tolerable, were as with sooti and ash i could c a bigger problem looming, ash was starting to feel this was not his home anymore as sooti used to chase him around the section, so good luck with whatever u decide and the new kitty, keep us posted.