My dad's lost his mind.....here we go again

[Queen of Poop]

Seriously.

My mom had to call the local police for assistance this morning. They came, talked to my dad for a half hour and then took him away to the local hospital for evaluation. He's gone completely looney tunes. While I was talking to my mom the police showed up at her door, I am assuming they collected her to go to the hospital to find out what next. I wait for her call. I offered to drive up but she declined my company for now.

[Catty1]

I saw your post on FB. It sounds like it was sudden and very very scary. I hope it is treatable, whatever "it" is.

HUGS and prayers!:love::love:

[momcat]

I'm so sorry to hear of this. Please know that my prayers are with you, your Mom, and your Dad.

[Freedom]

Wow! That could be so many things - sudden onset dementia, a reaction to meds, a need for meds . . . .

Prayers for all of you!

[Queen of Poop]

My dad has been taken to Centennial Centre in Ponoka. They specialize in seniors with mental issues. Apparently he hears at least 3 people in his head. They "sing" in his head. He was searching the house for intruders this morning, gun in hand. The police have seized his 2 BB guns, thank goodness. He will be in the "hospital" for at least 2 weeks. They will begin his evaluation tomorrow. He was not on any meds so this isn't caused by that.

Thanks all for the support.:love:

[Karen]

How frightening both for him and for your mom! He'll be in our prayers still!

[phesina]

Oh my God...

Prayers and hugs and good wishes to you and your Mom and Dad, Gayle.

Love from Pat (and cats)

[pomtzu]

That must have been so scary for your Mom. Prayers that they can resolve your Dad's issues quickly. How old is your Dad, Gayle?

[Queen of Poop]

That must have been so scary for your Mom. Prayers that they can resolve your Dad's issues quickly. How old is your Dad, Gayle?

He will be 72 on September 1st.

This episode started Thursday and escallated to this morning's incident. Mom said it took most of the day to stop shaking, but she was treated very, very well by the police officer, after he took dad to the hospital he came back and got mom and took her there. She was also treated very well at the hospital by the nurses/doctor. She's 70 and managing ok for now.

[DriftyAlison0]

Sending my thoughts and prayers out to you and your family. Hang in there!

[kuhio98]

This episode started Thursday and escallated to this morning's incident. Mom said it took most of the day to stop shaking, but she was treated very, very well by the police officer, after he took dad to the hospital he came back and got mom and took her there. She was also treated very well at the hospital by the nurses/doctor. She's 70 and managing ok for now.

Prayers for you and your Mom and Dad. Your poor Mom. I really feel for her. I hope they can help your father with medication. Aging can be so sad. It affects everyone differently.

[Marigold2]

Scary, thank God he didn't have a high powered gun. I hope he will be well soon. My first thought was a tumor of the brain. I am sending you my prayers. Know that there are many who care about you and who will support you in this most difficult time.

[Scooter's Mom]

Oh how scary!

I'm glad your mom has been treated well. I hope everything goes well for your dad while he is in the hospital.

[mrspunkysmom]

That is scary. You and your family have my prayers.

[Taz_Zoee]

Your family is in my thoughts. It must be so scary to see the person you've loved for so long suddenly not be the same anymore.

[Catty1]

I hope your mom has friends there to lean on. Those voices must have been horrifying for your dad, and shattering for your mom and you, dealing with the results.

If your dad has reached age 72 without meds, hopefully something can help him, medication or otherwise.

HUGS! :love::love::love:

[Malibu's Mom]

I have had people very, very near to me seemingly suddenly become mentally ill. Please know that people DO get better with time, medication, and support from family and friends. I will pray for you, your father and your mother during this very trying time. Lots of love and hugs coming your way. :love::love::love::love:

ETA: If you ever want to chat with someone who has been there I am always available.

[Grace]

Prayers for you, Gayle, and your parents. It has to be frightening for you and especially your Mom.

Had he shown any signs of mental stress before this?

72 is most definitely not old - stated by one who is rapidly approaching that age.

Hoping things will be straightened out quickly and you'll have many years left with your Dad :love:

[krazyaboutkatz]

I'm so sorry to hear this.:( I hope that whatever is causing this can be easily treated. Lots of prayers and positive thoughts are being sent to you and both of your parents. Please take care. (((HUGS)))

[tokolosh]

He will be 72 on September 1st.

This episode started Thursday and escallated to this morning's incident. Mom said it took most of the day to stop shaking, but she was treated very, very well by the police officer, after he took dad to the hospital he came back and got mom and took her there. She was also treated very well at the hospital by the nurses/doctor. She's 70 and managing ok for now.

It must have been really tough for your mom to make that call to the police. It feels so final when you have to do something like that about a member of your own family. I'm glad they treated her well and I'm sure they're helping her to know she did make the right decision about it.

[Medusa]

Well, we'll just send up lots of PT prayers. They've been known to work miracles. Keep the faythe that all will be well for everyone concerned. :love:

[caseysmom]

Something happened like this to a friend of mine but it was one of the stages of alzheimers and it wasn't the first sign. Thoughts for your father that it is something temporary and easy to resolve.

[Lilith Cherry]

Lots of loving thoughts for your dad's speedy recovery Gayle. We will all keep your family in our prayers.

[happylabs]

Prayers for you all! It is very difficult to watch our parents age. Mine are 87 and 88. Medication will definitely help. Hang in there!

[Queen of Poop]

Thanks all for the prayers and support. Just checked in with my mom, she's doing ok, got a really good sleep last night. She checked in with the hospital and my dad settled in ok, he's in a lockdown unit, has his own room with a bathroom, ate all his dinner and then proceeded to fall fast asleep. The evaluation process begins today, they should get back to my mom in the next couple of days, hopefully with some answers.

I'm so grateful to have my PT Family to lean on during these times. Thank you all so very, very much.:love:

[Karen]

I am glad your mom got a good night's sleep, that helps a lot. Especially knowing your dad is in a safe place. I hope they figure things out for and with him!

[Grace]

I wonder - had he recently started taking any new medication for an existing, physical problem? Elyse and I have both read Our Daily Meds - all about the pharmaceutical companies. There are medications out there that can be prescribed for a physical problem, but they can then cause other problems - some of them mental/emotional.

There was one drug, Detrol, that caused hallucinations in a woman very soon after she began it. She got diagnosed with early dementia - and it was no such thing.

I was taking an anti-seizure medication after my craniotomy last year. It caused me to become extremely short-tempered. There were times I could feel the rage building up in me. Thankfully I no longer have to take it.

I'm sure your dad's doctors are checking all these things.

[Queen of Poop]

I wonder - had he recently started taking any new medication for an existing, physical problem? Elyse and I have both read Our Daily Meds - all about the pharmaceutical companies. There are medications out there that can be prescribed for a physical problem, but they can then cause other problems - some of them mental/emotional.

There was one drug, Detrol, that caused hallucinations in a woman very soon after she began it. She got diagnosed with early dementia - and it was no such thing.

I was taking an anti-seizure medication after my craniotomy last year. It caused me to become extremely short-tempered. There were times I could feel the rage building up in me. Thankfully I no longer have to take it.

I'm sure your dad's doctors are checking all these things.

He's not on any meds so that's not the cause. He also had a CT Scan of his head a short while ago and they found nothing abnormal.

[Catty1]

More prayers for a good outcome. :love::love::love:

[cassiesmom]

Wow! That could be so many things - sudden onset dementia, a reaction to meds, a need for meds . . . .

Prayers for all of you!

That's what I was thinking too. It could be many things- a drop in blood pressure, dehydration or infection, or ...

More prayers being said!

[Freedom]

Your Dad is in a safe place, and will soon have a diagnosis.

Your Mom had a good night's sleep and is getting through this. I'm glad to read everyone paid attention to HER as well.

You also need to get some rest.

Continued prayers from RI.

[gini]

As wonderful as life can be - it can also be very cruel. I will light a candle for you and your Mom and Dad and pray for you too.

[Marigold2]

Any news yet? Sending prayers to you and family.:love:

[Queen of Poop]

Any news yet? Sending prayers to you and family.:love:

No news yet.

But my dad did phone my mom yesterday around 4 pm. He really wanted to know if she had been there trying to get in to see him. Apparently the nurses had told him no, but the voices in his head told him she had been there. She hadn't, she was at home all day yesterday. He clearly has issues and is in the best place he can be for them.

I had to explain to my mom how to pump gas last night though. She's 70 and never had to do it herself, dad always did it. Hopefully she was successful.

[phesina]

I lit a candle for you and your parents too, Gayle.

{{{{{{{{HUGS}}}}}}}} and ~~~~~~~PURRS~~~~~~~ and lots of :love::love::love::love::love::love::love::love:,
Pat and cats

[Queen of Poop]

My mom had a conversation with the doctor evaluating my dad. He feels sorry for him, says he's suffering, has "mood" swings. Really dude, where'd you get your degree, a cereal box. The man says "they" shine lasers in his eyes, he has 3 voices in his head and he has mood swings!!! He was crawling on his belly with a GUN!!! It would seem they're going to decide to ship him home next week, they have Thursday "hearings" to determine who stays and who goes. Who's going to be responsible if this idiot lets my dad out and he hurts or kills someone! OMG I am so angry, disappointed, upset!!! He has rights and can't be forced to take medication. I had hopes they could actually help him.

[Karen]

I'd definitely ask for another doctor to see him and evaluate him! He completely sounds like a danger to himself and others in his current mental state.

[Catty1]

In Alberta, Ponoka has one of the best-known and oldest psychiatric hospitals in the province. This does not mean "best".

Using medication is absolutely a good way for someone to be helped, as long as it deals with the condition a person has, and doesn't just mask it.

{{{hugs}}} I can't really imagine how frustrating this is for you. Bear in mind that you heard what the doctor said second hand, from your mom - and any honest person who is upset might hear something different than what the doctor actually said or meant.

More prayers coming.:love::love:

[phesina]

Gayle, can you talk with this doctor yourself? Your mother might be a bit overwhelmed by the entire situation.

And getting a second opinion sounds like a good idea.

More hugs and purrs and love and prayers for you.

[wombat2u2004]

OMG, I just found this thread.....QOP I'm keeping fingers crossed here that all will work out fine. Yeah, get another doctor.

[Queen of Poop]

I see my own counsellor this evening and will bring this up with her, get her take and then move forward. I looked up this doctor and it seems he deals with dementia, depression and suicide risk in the elderly. If this indeed is not dementia then it's likely some sort of psychosis and should be dealt with accordingly, perhaps he needs to be in another facility. I am very afraid of what he could do if he's let out. He was given phone access yesterday and called my mom 4 times that I knew of (hoping he didn't call her all night long). Each time it was weird and weirder. And he's been asking her for my phone number, so far she's not given it. The voices in his head are telling him things that just aren't so. Mom said she detailed all the events to the doctor who seemed unphased. At least he will remain there thru next Thursday, we can make a plan in the meantime.

Thanks again all for the support. Never a dull moment in my life, too bad it's all bad!

[cassiesmom]

the doctor... seemed unphased

That doesn't sound good to me. Maybe the doctor sees this every day; but I think he should still be concerned, for your dad's well-being and also for your mom and yours. And I'm making an assumption this was never a problem for your dad before last week, that it started then. There are so many things that can cause confusion or delirium; some of them are simple but others are complex. I'll keep praying.

[momcat]

Hi Gayle,
You're absolutely right, do talk to your counselor about your Dad's situation. It bothers me that his doctor seemed unphased by all of this. Maybe your counselor can offer a referral to another doctor for a second opinion and also give you some insight as to what's happening. You might want to ask your counselor what questions you should be asking and what answers you should expect.

My father had advanced Alzheimers so I understand what you and your Mom are going through right now. Don't hesitate to pm me if there's anything I can offer you from my experience.

Please know that my support and prayers continue for you, your Mom, and your Dad. Sending [[[[[HUGS]]]]] to you and your Mom :love:

[Catty1]

The doctor may seem unphased because he is very familiar with this kind of behaviour. It's friends and family's duty to be worried and upset - the doctor can't be if s/he is the decision maker.

By all means talk to your counsellor and even your own doctor.

{{{{HUGS}}}}

[jennielynn1970]

Gosh, this is so unsettling to say the least. I hope the doctors decide to keep him there and get him treated for whatever is going on. I mean, hearing voices in your head is NOT just a mood swing. I'll show them a mood swing, lol.

Thoughts and prayers going out to you and your mom and dad. I hope they make the right decision at the hospital, and if not, I hope you can get it taken care of some other way so that he doesn't hurt anyone else or himself.


HUGS!!!!

[Malibu's Mom]

I don't know about hearing voices in your head, but I know dementia can cause delusions. My grandma has them occasionally. I have no idea what the heck "mood swings" is supposed to mean? He thinks that your dad is bipolar? Sounds like the doctor doesn't know what he's talking about. If you can find another doctor, I would.

I really hope that he can be diagnosed soon. Still sending prayers and love to your dad, you & your mom. :love:

[Freedom]

but the voices in his head told him she had been there. .... He clearly has issues and is in the best place he can be for them.

I had to explain to my mom how to pump gas last night though. She's 70 and never had to do it herself, dad always did it. Hopefully she was successful.


My mom had a conversation with the doctor evaluating my dad. He feels sorry for him, says he's suffering, has "mood" swings. Really dude, where'd you get your degree, a cereal box. The man says "they" shine lasers in his eyes, he has 3 voices in his head and he has mood swings!!! He was crawling on his belly with a GUN!!! It would seem they're going to decide to ship him home next week, they have Thursday "hearings" to determine who stays and who goes. Who's going to be responsible if this idiot lets my dad out and he hurts or kills someone! OMG I am so angry, disappointed, upset!!! He has rights and can't be forced to take medication. I had hopes they could actually help him.

Gayle, is this what the doc told YOU, or how your Mum described it?

I've been through similar w/ a close family member (not my Dad). Just because they have periodic hearings -- which is proper procedure and the law here in USA -- does NOT mean they are releasing him. Just now, if I understand it, your Dad has been involuntarily held, as an emergency case. They've had time to evaluate him, and mean time the law says now time to see if he can be released. To me, the fact that the Doc said he is suffering, has mood swings, etc. means they have found reason to hold your Dad.

Apparently they've ID'd a med they want to try and your Dad doesn't want to take it. That is every person's right -- and again, a person who is a danger to himself and / or others who won't take their meds WILL NOT be released.

Much as it is a worry to your Mum having the phone calls, that is all evidence that adds up to why, at the hearing, the medical folks will advise keeping him.

Prayers continue for all of you.

[Queen of Poop]

My counsellor suggested I phone the doctor. But that plan's on hold for right now. My mom had a call from dad's social worker yesterday and is on her way to the hospital right now to take him some clothes and to see the social worker and doctor, as well as my dad. She's now taking the stance that he cannot come home if he's not medicated. She is not willing to take responsiblity for his actions. He is refusing meds. His first hearing time has been moved and won't now be until September 1st (ironically that's his 72nd birthday).

[Karen]

He is refusing meds. His first hearing time has been moved and won't now be until September 1st (ironically that's his 72nd birthday).

I am glad they moved the hearing back. I hope someone can get to the root of what's causing this, but at least you and your mom can rest a bit easier for now.

[Freedom]

She's now taking the stance that he cannot come home if he's not medicated. She is not willing to take responsiblity for his actions. He is refusing meds.

I wonder if they have a diagnosis, yet?

Some mental illnesses, the illness itself prevents the person taking meds. Schizophrenia is one of those - the person so believes they are all right and the world it out to get them, that they won't take meds. Folks with that diagnosis, in general, have a very low success rate at taking their meds. Too bad as, on the meds, they are often high functioning.

The Social Worker is doing her job. Again, hugs all around (yes, even to your Dad, as this is the illness talking, not the man you and your mom have known for years).

[Catty1]

Freedom - thanks for saying it is the illness talking. So true.

Gayle, I hope your mom taking a stand about your dad not coming home unless he is on medication sets him straight about that. It must be really hard for her - even though she had such a terrifying time.

More prayers for all of you.:love:

[mrspunkysmom]

I can't say much, but stay strong. You have my prayers.

[bishtmaster]

It is a sad story, but before looking at the title i thought it might be humorous.

[cassiesmom]

My counsellor suggested I phone the doctor. But that plan's on hold for right now. My mom had a call from dad's social worker yesterday and is on her way to the hospital right now to take him some clothes and to see the social worker and doctor, as well as my dad. She's now taking the stance that he cannot come home if he's not medicated. She is not willing to take responsiblity for his actions. He is refusing meds. His first hearing time has been moved and won't now be until September 1st (ironically that's his 72nd birthday).

Oh boy, this is continuing to be a difficult situation. I'll keep praying.

[Queen of Poop]

So my mom made the trek yesterday. She saw my dad and his doctor. Dad is in a sad state, still being tortured by the voices in his head. He is currently refusing all medications. Mom told him he had to take the meds if he wanted to come home, seed planted I hope.

Mom had a good talk with the Doctor and is feeling better about things now. She said she was quite firm in not wanting dad back until and unless he was on meds, they were working and he was willing to take them reliably. The doctor is working on building trust with my dad and wants to get him onto low dose meds first and take it from there. This promises to be a long process.

I have to say I'm really proud of my mom and how she is handling this whole awful situation. She's alot stronger than I gave her credit for and is really forward thinking about things like who/how to get their acreage lawn cut, winter snow removal and the like. I'll be going to spend the September long weekend with her and we'll address any issues she might have in getting set for winter there by herself.

[Freedom]

I have to say I'm really proud of my mom and how she is handling this whole awful situation. She's alot stronger than I gave her credit for and is really forward thinking about things like who/how to get their acreage lawn cut, winter snow removal and the like. I'll be going to spend the September long weekend with her and we'll address any issues she might have in getting set for winter there by herself.

Hey, good for Gayle's Mom! Can't be easy . . . doing stuff often helps us get through the tough times . . . she's getting things in order, that is great.

[tokolosh]

I have to say I'm really proud of my mom and how she is handling this whole awful situation.

I second that! She is doing great. I've been thinking about this off and on for a while and I thought maybe she'd benefit from having the numbers of a crisis or domestic violence hotline? Not so much as direct intervention since the cops and social worker seem to have that one locked. But just as an alternate source of non-judgemental support and an experienced 'place' where she can vent or process or think things through if she needs. Although it doesn't sound like your dad is being intentionally frightening to her the way more generic ******* are, she's still stuck with the trauma and the side-effects of having her partner suddenly become extremely scary. She sure deserves all the support and validation that she can get.

[cassiesmom]

QofP, just wondering how things are going for your dad, mom and you. Hope they are going okay.

Hugs and prayers,
elyse

[Queen of Poop]

My mom talked with dad's social worker yesterday. Apparently he'd packed his bag and was planning to leave there yesterday morning. This place is locked down and there was no way he was leaving. They had quite a time getting him to settle down and go back to his room. His doctor is on vacation, previously planned. Dad apparently doesnt' like the replacement doctor at all - great! The original doctor did finally get him to agree to take meds to help him sleep - they are low dose anti psychotics. Not sure they're working so great yet. Mom had me type up and email a list of "events" to the social worker last evening so they'd have a better idea of what has been going on. I am absolutely shocked at his behavior and believe he, my mom and anyone near them is in jeopardy if he's released unmedicated. September 1 is his "hearing". I sure hope they decide to keep him longer.

[Alysser]

Really sorry I haven't seen this yet. This sounds like quite a mess and I am so sorry. :( I hope they find out what's going on very soon. Much luck and good thoughts for your dad, your mom, and you!

[Queen of Poop]

It's been a few days, thought I'd put down a further update. On Saturday morning dad again packed and tried to leave. Was banging on the doors and pushing on them to be let out. They had a doctor come to sedate him but they were able to get him settled down without that. Later that day mom phoned him and he had no idea who she was, at first, till she told him, then he said he had a little squabble. That they don't seem to understand that he is to be released.

On Thursday, Sep 1, is his hearing. Mom's sent info and provided answers to a ton of questions, she is also going to be conference called into the hearing so she can hear the goings on and provide a statement. Basically she's going to tell them that she is afraid for her safety if he comes home as he's clearly not responding to the low dose meds and seems to be more irrational than before.

I'm just praying that they keep him there. Until he reliably takes meds or for the rest of his days.

[Karen]

Oh, gosh, I hope the hearing goes your way, and they are better able to find a way to stabilize him as time goes on. Have they any idea what is causing this? You are all still in our prayers.

[Freedom]

Oh, gosh, I hope the hearing goes your way, and they are better able to find a way to stabilize him as time goes on. Have they any idea what is causing this? You are all still in our prayers.

What Karen said.

[Queen of Poop]

Well, today is the hearing, as well as my dad's 72nd birthday.

Spoke with my mom last night, she was really angry. She had a call from the social worker, apparently dad's playing the I'm normal, can I go home card. He would hide his behavior if I was visiting but let fly when it was just he and my mom. Seems that's what he's trying to do now. Mom has full intention of ensuring they know exactly what went on during the 10 days before he was finally taken away.

Praying they keep him locked up and continue to try to treat him.

[Freedom]

Gayle, that is quite common, and I'm sure the professionals have encountered this before.

Continued prayers for you and your folks.

[Catty1]

More prayers. I don't know if they can give him medication against his will, legally...but I am sure they will go on trying to work with him.

Do the docs have a diagnosis? Any idea of what happened?

[pomtzu]

Well, today is the hearing, as well as my dad's 72nd birthday.

Spoke with my mom last night, she was really angry. She had a call from the social worker, apparently dad's playing the I'm normal, can I go home card. He would hide his behavior if I was visiting but let fly when it was just he and my mom. Seems that's what he's trying to do now. Mom has full intention of ensuring they know exactly what went on during the 10 days before he was finally taken away.

Praying they keep him locked up and continue to try to treat him.

Strange indeed. He must have his wits about him if he would hide the behavior when you were around, and is now pulling the "normal act" for his doctors. He obviously knows what he's doing if that's the case. Sounds like a very complicated situation, to say the least.

Hoping that the experts can sort it all out and help him.

[phesina]

Continuing prayers for you and your folks, Gayle.

:love::love::love::love::love::love::love::love:

[Queen of Poop]

Mom just called me. She gave her statement. Was asked if she ever felt threatened by dad, she replied no, but during a phone call while he's been locked up he wasn't sure he was actually talking to her or someone else. She was also asked if she felt she could take care of him in his present state, she replied No. They thanked her for her input and that was it. Now we wait.

I congratulated her on standing her ground and finally using her backbone. Told her to go get herself a reward of some sort this afternoon. Regardless of the outcome now she's done good!

[cassiesmom]

I just came to check this thread and see how things are going since yesterday was Sept. 1. I'll keep praying.

[Lilith Cherry]

Keeping you and your family in my thoughts and prayers:love:

[Queen of Poop]

Visiting with Mom. Dad is going to be staying at the hospital for a while yet. His release was denied. Prayers answered. Hopefully they can get him on some meds to ease his mind and maybe bring him home in the future.

[Freedom]

He is safe and getting care where he is. Yup, hope they can get him to take some meds. Hugs to you and your mum.

[Karen]

Gayle, I brought your Dad up at prayer concerns at church today, and one woman stopped me afterwards and said you and your mom should look for support groups for the families of the mentally ill. She had a sister, now deceased, that was mentally ill, and she said often the folks in the support groups were more helpful and knowledgeable than the medical professionals.

[Queen of Poop]

Gayle, I brought your Dad up at prayer concerns at church today, and one woman stopped me afterwards and said you and your mom should look for support groups for the families of the mentally ill. She had a sister, now deceased, that was mentally ill, and she said often the folks in the support groups were more helpful and knowledgeable than the medical professionals.

Thank you for thinking of us Karen. I've provided my mom all the info I can about support for this/that and the other thing. Now it's up to her. She seems right now to just be gathering those nearby and letting them in on the news. I'm hoping as time passes she will seek out further support.

[Kirsten]

Gayle, I'm sorry I didn't see this earlier. This is a scary situation for your family, for everyone involved. Do they have a diagnosis by now? They should have, especially when there are plans to medicate him, and I guess it's easier to find the right meds if they know what they're dealing with. If this is some kind of psychosis (and voices in his head sounds pretty much like it), it will be difficult for family members to care for that person as long as the psychosis remains untreated. Been around a psychotic person a few years ago, and yes, it was scary - and dangerous - until she got her meds! I really hope his doctors have any idea by now where this was coming from, so they can find a good therapy!

Keeping you and your family in my thoughts...

[gini]

You have so much on your plate right now I don't know how you do it.
Prayers will be offered for you and your parents.

[cassiesmom]

Just checking in for update. I'll keep praying.

[beeniesmom]

Some mental illnesses, the illness itself prevents the person taking meds. Schizophrenia is one of those - the person so believes they are all right and the world it out to get them, that they won't take meds.

I was very close with a person who had a 'schizophrenic episode', as the doctors called it. It's more common in men then women.
He spent some time in a hospital and was able to go home after a few months. I don't rememebr what medication they gave him, but it took many months for his 'voices' and hallucinations to go away. It was all so sudden. We were good friends and saw each other every day. It happened one day before mass started in church of all places; he just got up, ran to the alter and started saying he was Jesus Christ and that he had to save everyone. My friend and I thought he was joking around at first and were quite embarrassed... but he was very serious. We had to drag him off and took him home. When his unstable behaviour continued, his parents took him to the hospital. They never found out what happened to trigger the behavior. It's been years since I've seen or heard from him (since getting married). The last I heard he had just gotten married himself and was leading a normal life.
I hope things resolve themselves with your dad. It's very hard to see a loved one go through this. hugs

[Queen of Poop]

Sorry for making everyone wait for an update.

Finally, we know what is wrong. More or less. Schizophrenia. But my dad's not typical. He's been able to hold a job, have a marriage and a family (sort of) and is highly intelligent.

He's on meds, but only 1 mg. It will take a considerable amount of time to work him up to probably 6 mg.

His latest things are: the voices have told him my mom is dead, that the woman who calls is an imposter, that their house burned down, that someone is putting something in the food. The doctor is trying to convince him that the food is safe and so far he's still eating. They are going to give him escorted walks very soon as they don't consider him a "runner", he's too old and in poor shape.

My mom is having trouble accepting that he may not come home, that no amount of meds will make him safe to be out.

Thanks everyone for your support with this. I do pass along the comments to my mom when we chat on the phone. She is amazed by our community and the kindness that is shared.

[Kirsten]

Sorry for making everyone wait for an update.

Finally, we know what is wrong. More or less. Schizophrenia. But my dad's not typical. He's been able to hold a job, have a marriage and a family (sort of) and is highly intelligent.

He's on meds, but only 1 mg. It will take a considerable amount of time to work him up to probably 6 mg.

His latest things are: the voices have told him my mom is dead, that the woman who calls is an imposter, that their house burned down, that someone is putting something in the food. The doctor is trying to convince him that the food is safe and so far he's still eating. They are going to give him escorted walks very soon as they don't consider him a "runner", he's too old and in poor shape.

My mom is having trouble accepting that he may not come home, that no amount of meds will make him safe to be out.

Thanks everyone for your support with this. I do pass along the comments to my mom when we chat on the phone. She is amazed by our community and the kindness that is shared.

I'm sorry about that. Sounds difficult - for him, and for everyone involved. How horrible and scary it must be to have these voices in your head, telling you all these terrible things... I really hope the meds will bring some relief.

Is it that kind of schizophrenia that's related to age? He didn't show any signs of it when he was younger, did he?

Keeping you all in my thoughts... (((hugs)))

[Catty1]

It is something of a relief, I suppose, to have a diagnosis.

I pray that the meds can slowly increase and that they work well for your dad. To have those constant thoughts in your head is not fun, either. Prayers for healing and peace for you all.:love:

[momcat]

Now you and your Mom finally have some answers. I can understand what a difficult time this must be for both of you. Please say hi to your Mom for me and be assured that all of you remain very much in my prayers :love:

[pomtzu]

I had an aunt with schizophrenia, but at the time I was just a kid and had no idea what was wrong with her - I just knew that something wasn't right. She lived in an institution and would get occasional weekend visits to her sister (they were both old maids), and I can remember my Dad having to drive her back "home" on Sunday nights. It was something that wasn't talked about around us kids, and it wasn't until I was older that I knew what was going on. Back then (in the 50's), they didn't have the meds that are available now, and it was pretty much keep them heavily sedated, or just let them be, as long as they weren't a threat to anyone.
Hopefully with the progress that has been made over the years and the meds and treatments now available, that your Dad will regain some sort of normalcy and perhaps even be able to return home at some time in the future. My prayers go out to him and all of the family. Hang in there, Gayle.

[wombat2u2004]

It is something of a relief, I suppose, to have a diagnosis.

I pray that the meds can slowly increase and that they work well for your dad. To have those constant thoughts in your head is not fun, either. Prayers for healing and peace for you all.:love:

If they know what is to be treated, then they are miles ahead.

[*LabLoverKEB*]

Gayle, I am so sorry to hear about your dad and his newly diagnosed condition. I can only imagine how hard this is for you and the rest of your family. I will definitely be keeping your father, mother, and of course you and your other family members in my thoughts and prayers. We love you and we are here for you, Gayle! :love:

[Bonny]

Have been reading the posts about your dad.I am so glad they have found out what is wrong with your dad & hopefully the medicines will help him. Praying for you Gayle & your family. (((HUGS)))

[*LabLoverKEB*]

Just wanted to say that I'm still keeping your father in my prayers as well as your mom and rest of the family. :love:

[Freedom]

Sorry for making everyone wait for an update.

Finally, we know what is wrong. More or less. Schizophrenia. But my dad's not typical. He's been able to hold a job, have a marriage and a family (sort of) and is highly intelligent.

My mom is having trouble accepting that he may not come home, that no amount of meds will make him safe to be out.

Having the diagnosis is very helpful in treatment, and for the family to understand a bit of what is going on with him.

I am sure this is hard for your mum to adjust to, such a big unexpected change. She probably figured they'd go on until one of them dropped dead, or had to go to a nursing home. Just vague "sometime in the future" stuff. Suddenly, as with any chronic illness, the future has changed plus has arrived, all at once. It does take time to wrap your head around such suddenness. It's not just that, but all the things she had planned for them together are now gone, as well. Give her time, let her talk. You also will feel all sorts of things, and need to as well.

Sometimes, understanding the illness helps, sometimes knowing he is safe and well cared for helps. Sometimes visiting and seeing him carry on that she's not his wife, she's an imposter, helps to sink in the new situation.

Blessings to all of you at this time. Please try to find some peace with this.

[cassiesmom]

Gayle, I am so sorry to hear about your dad and his newly diagnosed condition. I can only imagine how hard this is for you and the rest of your family. I will definitely be keeping your father, mother, and of course you and your other family members in my thoughts and prayers. We love you and we are here for you, Gayle! :love:

I'm just checking in again for an update. I'll continue praying. Couldn't agree more with what Lab Lover has written.

[phesina]

Continuing prayers for you and your family, dear Gayle.

I'm glad there is a diagnosis now, so you and your mother can come to understand and you know that your dad is getting the treatment and care he needs. All three of you are going through MAJOR changes in your lives.

:love::love::love::love::love::love::love::love:,
Pat and cats

[Charlie08]

how is your dad doing now? and how is your mom getting along?

[cassiesmom]

Q of P, how are you and your mom doing, and how is your dad? Is the medication helping?

[Queen of Poop]

Mom's doing good. She continues to have small victories in being on her own. She still thinks dad's going to come home and be ok. The doctor had been trying to increase dad's meds and they seemed to help a wee bit, but not as much as one might hope - yet. As for me, I've kind of had to put them out of my mind for now as a prepare for the mediation/arbitration. They can again have my focus after Nov 3. Be nice to only have one stressful thing on my plate! Thanks again for continuing to check in on us and for keeping us in your thoughts. You're such wonderful people!

[Karen]

I am glad the dosage increase is helping, it is a tricky thing, as everyone's brain chemistry is different, and schizophrenia can be tricky to treat. A friend of mine's mom has it, and I am always sure to tell him (he has married and moved a couple towns away) when I see a marked change in Loretta's behavior, as it is often difficult for his dad to notice as he is with her every day.

Keep up the good work on your part, and we will all celebrate with you when the mediation and whole divorce thing is over!

[Queen of Poop]

So just a little update on my dad. He is still in care, today they will renew him for another 30 days. He has now been moved into a room with another person. The doctor felt my dad was spending too much time sitting in a chair doing nothing, not interacting with anyone, not participating in any activities, nothing. Apparently it's going ok so far. He is, as always, regimented in his schedule, always showers and cleans himself up, always on time for meals but then does nothing but sit. When his social worker tried to engage him in conversation she failed. He had nothing to say about me, my brother, my mom, home, really nothing at all. All that matters to him is himself and his own little world - nothing new here. Apparently the social worker found him hard to read, engage, understand. Welcome to our world dear. The doctor will be upping his meds a little more very soon, so we'll see what impact that has.

Thanks again all for your support in this.

My mom's doing very well. Is going to see today about getting some good winter tires on her car as this will be the first time she's had to drive in the winter time in her life! :eek:

[Freedom]

Sigh, I just don't know what to say. Sounds like your Dad was functioning with a life long issue, and now he is getting care. That is good.

This must all be so hard for your mom, and for you as well. For her, doing all these "firsts," will help build her confidence over time. But sure is alot to manage all at once! And for you, just one more thing to juggle. Prayers for all of you, and that some things do resolve so you have fewer things on your plate all at one time.

[cassiesmom]

Q of P, thinking of you this evening. Hoping that an increase in your dad's medication dose will help. (((HUGS)))

[Queen of Poop]

Another uppydate. My dad's meds have not yet been increased. He's figured out the doctor is the one keeping him locked up so he's not been speaking to the doctor for a bit now. He is still taking the meds at this point. Every day he asks if his discharge papers are ready. He told my mom that he'd be released this week, of course he won't be but the "voices" tell him he will be. He does not ask mom how she is, or ask about me or my brother. He's going to need to be in the hospital for a good, long time yet it would seem.

Thanks for continuing to check in on us!

[Karen]

Yes, a woman I know was a paranoid schizophrenic, and if she missed a dose of her medicines, she would sometimes decide the doctors or the medicines themselves were to blame, and then she would hide them, or refuse to take them, flush them, etc. It was sad, because when she was on the correct dosage, she was nice and sane and fairly pleasant. It is such a tricky disease, and our brain chemistry is fragile and often misunderstood.

[Queen of Poop]

So we have some new developments with Dad. None of them are good either.

He's requested to go before the review board. If he is successful they will let him out!!! :eek:

Going against him is the fact that he's not kept secret from his doctor or social worker the fact that he does not believe he needs to be medicated and will immediately stop taking the meds once free. Also going against him is my mom. She and I are working up her statement to be given to the review board with my dad present. She's basically going to tell them she doesn't want him back unmedicated so that he can go back to looking for bombs, believing there are people outside who are trying to shoot him in the head, dragging her from room to room and in/out side as the voices demand, not eating their food or drinking their water/coffee because they've been poisioned, etc. She's not willing to put up with that behaviour again and will defy him. Which, God Forbid, could put her in jeopardy.

I can't really see him being successful at this point, especially with his out loud admission regarding the meds. He's using the fact that winter is coming and my mom cannot function/survive without him. Surprise dad, she is all set up to manage on her own this winter - she's ALOT stronger than anyone gave her credit.

We don't yet know when he will go before the review panel.

[Karen]

Prayers on the way that they will see the truth and keep him locked up.

[Catty1]

Many prayers for you! I am sure the review will NOT go in his favour.

One might hope that hearing that statement from your mom - his wife - might have an impact on him.

I hope he heals at some point; the man he was would not do these things.

{{{{hugs}}}}

[phesina]

Prayers that he is not released.

[Freedom]

I still keep all of you in my prayers. Just read this latest. You know the review board is familiar with these types of situations. Just maintain the documentation and it will work out.

[cassiesmom]

Oh, boy. Q of P, I'll keep praying for you and your mom, and for your dad too. I agree with what everyone said, that he doesn't sound ready for discharge yet.

[Queen of Poop]

His hearing with the review board is Wednesday, November 16th. My birthday. Hopefully my gift will be that he's to be kept there for a while longer yet, that he will hear the words my mom's going to say and maybe realize he does need the help/meds afterall.

[Karen]

Yes, that's the biggest issue with this disease - getting the balance of meds right, and keeping the patient on them. We'll keep you in our thoughts that day!

[Marigold2]

Oh Gayle I am so sorry to hear this, he needs to stay and get more help for sure.

[cassiesmom]

I'm just checking for an update and see there was a meeting scheduled for today. I hope it was a productive one!

[Queen of Poop]

So, got the results from the last hearing and an unexpected turn of events.

The review went a little differently this time. Mom got to be in on the whole thing, heard my dad's doctors review, heard and took questions from the supervising woman psychiatrist, and heard my dad be questioned. After it was done mom was suitably impressed with the woman psychiatrist - she seemed to have my dad figured out. Mom called dad's regular doc yesterday for the results, of course they determined he needed to stay. However, dad can and did after 48 hours, file a request to have another hearing as he didn't like their determination that he needed to stay. Now the panel can and probably will reject his request for another hearing, nothing has changed in his condition and he's just doing it because he didn't get the answer he wanted. He apparently also was shocked at what my mom had to say about him - really dad, you did all those weird things! So we will see shortly how this will go, whether he gets a new hearing or they tell him no. Mom's not happy about it at all, but is set in her resolve that he stay there, get properly medicated, understand the need for the meds and then perhaps come home. The woman psychiatrist did question dad's doc as to his competency. Right now they're not ready to declare him incompetent, but that may be coming, then the ball game changes.

[Karen]

Oh, Gayle, that's great. Not that your Dad gets another hearing so soon, but that your mother seems happy with the doctor that is treating him, and the docs understand!

Give your mom a hug from me next time you see her, okay?

[mrspunkysmom]

Good to hear that he is still getting help. I'll keep you in my prayers.

[Daisy and Delilah]

My thoughts and prayers are going out:(

[Queen of Poop]

Well, they're going to give dad another hearing, on December 1. My mom was really upset about this yesterday, she was counting on them telling him no. I told her to get over it, that this is dad's new fixation (getting out of the hospital, rather than looking for bombs, bugs or lasers). That he will continue to try to get out and she can either give up and let him come home or stand up, take control and say hell no, get him medicated and on the road to whatever recovery he can achieve. She had a melt down yesterday, hopefully she's better today.

[Karen]

I think she's allowed to have an occasional meltdown, with everything she has been through. Give her a hug from us, okay?

The good thing about giving someone a hug is 99% of the time, you get a hug in return!

[rosethecopycat]

Thinking of you, Gayle.

[beeniesmom]

Thinking about you and your family.

[cassiesmom]

I just now found the most recent update about the December 1 hearing. That was almost two weeks ago so I am hoping the decision was that your dad should stay under care yet. I'll keep praying.

[Queen of Poop]

It took a while for the committee to get back to my mom. But dad will be staying with them a while longer. And, he may not be allowed any further hearings for a while. His doctor was to come up with a new treatment plan as dad wasn't really any different from the day he went in save for sleeping more with the medication. He is now apparently to be medicated twice daily. Mom spoke with him directly a few days ago and he made some snide comments to her. She'll be calling him again, just before Christmas. Hopefully that goes better.

Provided we don't get a huge snow storm on the 24th I will be heading out to spend Christmas with Mom in Sundre. It's an hour north and 30 min west from Calgary. So long as the highways are in good condition Cali, Diego and I will go visit her for a few days.

[Karen]

Sounds good, glad they are keeping him, and adjusting medications.

[cassiesmom]

Thinking and praying for all three of you, Q of P. :love:

[Queen of Poop]

Mom talked to Dad yesterday. Apparently he's not very happy with her and doesn't really care for "her" version of the truth. Claims his meds aren't helping with the voices or the lasers, but they do help him sleep. He says his latest certificate will keep him in the "hospital" until June. Mom is going to call the social worker to confirm that he's "in" for the next 6 months and to raise questions about the medication dad's getting.

It's clear to me that he is where he needs to be right now.

I'll be heading out to spend a few days with mom tomorrow morning. Taking her lots of good things for Christmas, along with me, Cali and Diego!

Thank you all for continuing to think of us.:love:

[phesina]

Gayle, may you and your mom, and your dad too, have a peaceful and comforting Christmas.

[Karen]

It sounds great if they are planning on keeping him for next 6 months, less for your mom to worry about. And maybe in that time, they can adjust his medication and get him to saner thoughts. It's always tricky with mental health issues.

[cassiesmom]

I am here checking for an update and just saw the one in #123. I'll keep praying. Hoping for continued progress.

[Queen of Poop]

Had a good Christmas with Mom. Took her lots of presents and she loved them all - she deserved to be "spoiled" after all she's been thru and done for me thru my divorce.

Dad is indeed in for 6 months. They can release him sooner if he "gets better" but chances of that seem unlikely. Mom will talk to him later this week and see how he is doing now. She's also going to check in with the doctor to find out what they are going to be doing, etc.

Thanks all for continuing to care about us. It is much appreciated. :love:

[mrspunkysmom]

Glad Christmas was good.

Continued prayers for you and your family.

[Catty1]

I am so glad you and your Mom had a good Christmas! She AND you certainly deserve the best. :)

Prayers and hopes for a healing and happy 2012 for all.