Dad ... he's gone.

[beeniesmom]

I know I should probably put this in the prayer requests...

Please pray that the chemo my dad starts tomorrow will rid him of the cancer he has.
I hope that he will be able to see his one and only granddaughter grow up. I feel bad that he hasn't even had a chance to meet her yet.

I know you can't chose when you get sick or what you die of but it's just so unfair for this to happen now. We found out the day Laura was born. I've been so miserable and not enjoying my baby because of it.

I am just so so upset that I think I will explode.
I feel helpless and scared. He's too young...

[Karen]

He will be in our prayers. I know many cancer survivors, including some here on Pet Talk! What kind of cancer does he have? Chemo is often miserable, but it is worth it in the long run.

[joycenalex]

he's in my prayers

[beeniesmom]

What kind of cancer does he have?

His tests are showing it as neuroendocrine cancer.
The source may be in his stomach. They really aren't 100% sure.
He has mets in his liver already.

[Daisy and Delilah]

Carmen, my heart is with you all. I will keep you all in my thoughts and prayers every single day. I have a good feeling that your Dad will get better and everything will be wonderful again. {{{{{HUGS}}}}}

[Medusa]

For your dad (and you):

The Light of God surrounds you

The Love of God enfolds you

The Power of God protects you

The Wisdom of God guides and directs you

Wherever you go, God is

And all is well

And so it is

Amen.

Keep the faythe. And by all means enjoy your baby. :love:

[beeniesmom]

Thank you Karen, Joyce, Terry and Mary. That's a very beautiful prayer.

[moosmom]

Beeniesmom,

Your Dad will be in my thoughts and prayers.

:love: & Hugs,

Donna and fur crew

[k9krazee]

He'll definitely be in my thoughts and prayers. ((hugs))

[Puckstop31]

On the way.... "Father God, guide his caregivers hands, hearts and minds."

My dad survived the first major round of chemo to treat his lymphoma. He now has to have a treatment every 6 months. So I kinda know how you feel. So do yourself a favor... Worry more about the things you have control of, like your lovely daughter. :) I know I would not want our daughter to miss out on her children worrying about me.

:love:

[Laura's Babies]

My thoughts and prayers are with you and your Dad. I know this is a stressful time for all of you, I lost my Mom to cancer and a brother so I know what you are going through.

[finn's mom]

Add me to the prayer list. My brother is a leukemia survivor, I will pray that your dad is victorious, too!

[beeniesmom]

So do yourself a favor... Worry more about the things you have control of, like your lovely daughter. :) I know I would not want our daughter to miss out on her children worrying about me. :love:

Thank you. :'''(

Just spoke to mom. She said her and my brothers were there with him during the treatment but he insisted that they all leave when it was done so they wouldn't see him get sick.
He's got two more, one tomorrow and one on Wednesday then a small break. Does anyone know, if he should need a liver transplant (which he probably will), is it difficult to find a compatible liver? Would us kids need to see if we were a match or is the liver an organ that can be donated by anyone? I feel like that's a stupid question.... like I should know.

[Barbara]

Sending all my best wishes- I can understand that all that is just too much for your family. But please don't forget your sweet baby girl- and look at her to get a smile in these hard times.
If I'm right then a liver cannot be donated by a living person, so it's about finding one of somebody deceased. But let's first pray that he gets over chemotherapy and take it from there.

[Anikaca77]

Prays coming for your dad.

Melissa

[Daisy and Delilah]

Thank you. :'''(

Just spoke to mom. She said her and my brothers were there with him during the treatment but he insisted that they all leave when it was done so they wouldn't see him get sick.
He's got two more, one tomorrow and one on Wednesday then a small break. Does anyone know, if he should need a liver transplant (which he probably will), is it difficult to find a compatible liver? Would us kids need to see if we were a match or is the liver an organ that can be donated by anyone? I feel like that's a stupid question.... like I should know.

Carmen, no questions are stupid questions, as far as I'm concerned.

I'm not a medical person. I'm not sure if the liver can be taken in part from a family member and transplanted. I know we have some medical experts on the board.
I believe the liver will regenerate in certain cases but I would think they would look for a compatible liver from someone that has died and is donating their organs. Not sure though.

I just want to wish all of you the best again. My best friend started chemo last week. She's on a continuous pump system feeding into a pic line. I know a little bit about how you feel too. it's very very hard to remain stoic and be supportive without breaking down yourself. {{{{{HUGS}}}}}

[Randi]

I'm sending my best wishes that your dad pulls through this. It's hard on you all, but try to enjoy your baby. :)

(((hugs)))

[slick]

The "C" word is so scary but keep in mind - it doesn't mean a death sentence anymore. They are make great strides in cancer treatment and research. Your Dad will pull through this, I'm sure of it.

Keep a strong and good attitude and repeat after me "It's only a bump in the road." Puck is right - there's no point in spending energy worrying about that which you have no control over. Instead try to find some humour - I don't mean that in an insulting way. Cancer is nothing to laugh at, I know, but keeping a good attitude and sense of humour is the key to recovery.

Prayers on the way from me.:love:

[Pembroke_Corgi]

I'm so sorry to hear about your dad. I will send your dad my good wishes and thoughts.

I know your family is far away (if I remember right they live overseas, right?) but is there anyway you and Laura could visit? Maybe having a date set to go see him will help you manage your feelings of helplessness.

[beeniesmom]

I know your family is far away (if I remember right they live overseas, right?) but is there anyway you and Laura could visit? Maybe having a date set to go see him will help you manage your feelings of helplessness.

Yes, they live in Italy. I am trying to get Laura on my passport. I got her birth certificate and now I am waiting on her SS#. As soon as that is done I can start the paperwork to add her to my passport.... then she needs at least 2 rounds of shots before she can travel (through international airports). Her first shots are Oct. 2nd and then again in November. The soonest I can get over there, if I want to take her with me, which I really want to and need to, is sometime mid-November...

Thank you everyone for your support.

Thank you Slick. I know you are travelling this road... I will try to stay positive... like you said... it's a bump in the road. Your words of encouragement mean a lot to me. When I spoke to dad yesterday, I did try to make a little joke. The place where he is getting his treatment is on the mountain overlooking the gulf of Naples (one of the most beautiful places I know of). I told him that we were all going to be envious of him going to this vacation resort on the mountain... :o

[kokopup]

Your family and father will be in my thoughts and prayers as he goes forth with his treatment. Being a cancer surviver myself I know that your father's main concern is the wellbeing of his loved ones. He would not want you to fret over his situation and would want you to give your full attention to your Laura. I know you feel helpless and in this case other than praying for his recovery there is nothing that you can do. You be there for Laura and turn the rest over to God.

Bill

[lizbud]

Prayers and good wishes for you Dad's recovery. You both will be
in my prayers.

[ramanth]

Many prayers and healing vibes for him.

My FIL is going through chemo right now too.

[cassiesmom]

Carmen, my heart is with you all. I will keep you all in my thoughts and prayers every single day. {{{{{HUGS}}}}}

Me too, me too.

[beeniesmom]

Bad news just got worse...
They had to stop the chemo because his liver couldn't handle it.
Also, they have discovered it's in his lungs and bones as well.
For now, they will start radiation therapy that is the only therapy that might be effective to slow the bones deterioration down.
For now... it looks like he has 6 months.
I am numb.
Got Laura's SS card in the mail yesterday.
I'll be applying for her passport tomorrow.

[pomtzu]

I am so sorry to hear this, but all I can do is offer prayers for your Dad and you and the entire family.
Cancer is probably the most dreaded diagnosis anyone could be dealt - not only for the patient - but for everyone involved. I know it's easier said than done, but please try to be strong, no matter the outcome. You have that little person just starting her life, that needs you.
Unfortunately, I've had to deal with this dreaded disease with family too. My father, grandfather, and 2 uncles all passed away with cancer, and both of my brother have had it too. It never got any easier to accept no matter how many times I had to face it.
Just know that we all have you and your Dad in our thoughts and prayers.

[slick]

Bad news just got worse...
For now... it looks like he has 6 months.
I am numb. 6 months??? :( The doctors are not God. They really don't know. I know several cancer patients who were told the same thing and that was years ago. Keep the faith!!! :love:

[jennielynn1970]

Healing thoughts and prayers are going out to your father. I hope that the doctors can do something to drastically slow down the cancer cells, and that he will have much longer to live.

My thoughts are with you, Carmen.

[cassiesmom]

More prayers today
and a candle http://www.gratefulness.org/candles/message.cfm?l=eng&cid=9190757

[Daisy and Delilah]

I'm so sorry, Carmen. I wish there was something I could do to help you. Try to stay strong for your Dad and Laura. I am constantly praying for all of you. Don't give up. There are miracles every day now for cancer patients. {{{{{{{HUGS}}}}}}}

[Pembroke_Corgi]

I'm so sorry. You all have been in my thoughts lately and I'll continue to keep you there.

[beeniesmom]

Thanks guys.
We were able to apply for little pumpkins passport today.
They said 6 to 8 weeks but most likely a lot sooner.
My sister and I are both making arrangements to go together in November, unless an emrgency should arise and we need to go sooner.

[ramanth]

Hope the passport gets approved and delivered quickly.

Still in my thoughts and prayers. :love:

[Alysser]

No one should ever have to deal with this. I am so sorry Carmen, my mom went through breast cancer. Doctors are not always right, please don't give up hope and think 6 months is the automatic time for your dad, because it's certainly doesn't need to be. Many (((hugs))) going out to you at this hard time! :love:

[gemini9961]

I'm so sorry Carmen. I hope you can get over there to see him soon and take precious Laura with you.

[cassiesmom]

Beeniesmom, I hope the passport arrives a lot sooner than 6 to 8 weeks- paws and fingers crossed on that. Just wanted to say you're on my heart and mind again today.

Thinking of you--
elyse

[beeniesmom]

I called the passport agency this morning and they haven't even recieved Laura's paperwork yet. It was submitted last Friday. Ridiculous.

They told me to call back Monday for info. Once they find the paperwork, I can get expidited service for an additional 75$.
I just wish I had done that last week ... I had a gut feeling.... that I was going to need it sooner than I thought.

My brothers spoke to the drs.
The results of his MRI were really bad.

I'm going in mid October now. I hope we make it to say goodbye.

[beeniesmom]

Karen, can you please move this to the dog house. I just realized it doesn't belong here in dog general... sorry.

[AdoreMyDogs]

Carmen I'm so sorry. Your family is in my prayers. Miracles DO happen, it IS possible. Please don't lose hope, as hard as it may seem. Now go and give that beautiful little angel of yours a huge hug and kiss for me, please.

[Catty1]

HUGS.

So awful to be so far away.

There is a friend at a hospital in Calgary here who had the same thing...starting in bones, into abdomen and lungs...he never saw a doctor in his life and yes, he is terminal.

BUT - there is another man there with, yes, the SAME thing - he was terminal and no longer is! He is still going through some treatments, but is coming along.

I wonder if the doctors in Naples are open to any alternatives like Transfer Factor, etc?

HUGS and Prayers to you...it ain't over yet, hon! Prayers for a miracle.:love::love::love:

[Daisy and Delilah]

How frustrating for you, Carmen. You all are still in my thoughts and prayers. Keep the faith. Miracles do happen. {{{{{HUGS}}}}}

[phesina]

Prayers for you all.

[prechrswife]

I'm so sorry. This is never an easy road to walk...:(

[cassiesmom]

I called the passport agency this morning and they haven't even recieved Laura's paperwork yet. It was submitted last Friday. Ridiculous. They told me to call back Monday for info. Once they find the paperwork, I can get expidited service for an additional 75$.
I just wish I had done that last week ... I had a gut feeling.... that I was going to need it sooner than I thought.

My brothers spoke to the drs.
The results of his MRI were really bad.

I'm going in mid October now. I hope we make it to say goodbye.

Beeniesmom, just a question - I am wondering if the fee for the expedited (sp?) service might be waived, since you have a specific reason why you need it quickly.

You asked about living related liver transplants. They are being done since there are too many potential donors waiting. Here is a list of sites that are doing it.
http://stason.org/TULARC/health/body/organ-transplant/56-Living-Related-Liver-Transplant-Programs-in-the-US.html

[dukedogsmom]

So sorry to learn of your dad. I hope things work out to where you can get there in time.

[Medusa]

When I read about the passport issue, I was going to post that you could have it expedited but you had already done the paperwork so I figured it was too late. I received mine in less than a week when I had to apply for another one because mine got lost in a move. Too bad that you don't live near Chicago. You can go there and get a passport on the same day. I do hope that this gets cleared up for you quickly so that all goes well. Prayers are continuing. Keep the faythe. :love:

[Pembroke_Corgi]

I just wanted to let you know that we are still thinking of you and your family. I hope you are all doing ok.

[beeniesmom]

He's gone. He passed away about an hour and a half ago.
I am in shock. Neither me or my sister got a chance to say goodbye.
I don't know what to do with myself.
Instead of comforting my mom, I said "oh now what".
I haven't cried yet. Hubby says it hasn't sunk in.

[Catty1]

{{{{hugs}}}}:love::love::love:

I believe your dad knew you were there...and it meant everything to him. And he knew you loved him.

Prayers and more hugs to you.:love:

[Daisy and Delilah]

Carmen, I am so very sorry. I can only imagine how you feel. I feel so bad for you that you didn't get to see him. My thoughts and prayers are with you all. :( :( :(
{{{{{{{HUGS}}}}}}}

Candace is right. Have comfort in knowing that your Dad knew you were with him in spirit. He left this earth knowing you tried your best to be with him and knowing how much you loved him.

[Medusa]

I concur w/the others; I think that on some level that they know we're there in spirit. I've also read and I've come to believe that sometimes people hang on because they know that their loved ones want them to stay and whenever those loved ones leave to attend to something else or to get a bite to eat or whatever, that's when the person who is ill makes his/her transition. Whatever the case, it will take some time to get used to the idea of not having Dad around. Myself, I became angry for a bit because the world didn't stop and life for everyone else went on as usual when my Dad died. Right now you're still in shock. Gather your loved ones close and lean on them to help you through and you'll find that you'll do the same for them, too. (((HUGS))) :love:

[pomtzu]

Carmen - you and your family have my deepest sympathies. Your Dad knew that you tried your best to be there, and you were with him in spirit. I hope you can find comfort in knowing that he is now at peace and free from the ravages of this dreaded disease. You all are in my prayers this sad day, and in the difficult days ahead.

[finn's mom]

Carmen, I am sorry that your Dad's time was so early. :(

[Edwina's Secretary]

There are not words to express. I am so sorry for your loss.

[gini]

I am so sorry for your loss. Comfort yourself with the knowledge that your Dad knew what was in your heart - you loved him dearly.

[momoffuzzyfaces]

I am so sorry for your loss! :love:

I firmly believe your dad knows how much you love him and that you would have been there if you could have!!! It's never easy to lose them but the love will remain with you forever. Prayers for you and your family! :love:

[Barbara]

Sending big hugs! I am so sorry that he had to go way too early- and that you couldn't be there.
Sending my sympathies:(

[AdoreMyDogs]

I am deeply sorry for your loss. So, so sorry :(

[chocolatepuppy]

I'm so sorry Carmen.:( You'll be in my thoughts and prayers.

[slick]

My deepest sympathies to you and the rest of the family. I know what it's like to lose a Dad and not be there to say good-bye. That's something that I struggle with on a day to day basis....14 years later. I've come to believe that my Dad didn't want me to watch him die. I believe that terminally ill patients choose when they die and perhaps your Dad thought it would be too hard on you to be there at the end.

{{{hugs}}} and prayers.

[*LabLoverKEB*]

Oh my gosh, Carmen. I cannot express how sorry I am for you, and your entire family, and all the people who knew and loved your dad.
May your father Rest in Peace. (((((HUGS)))):love:

[Catty1]

I saw this quote the other day, and just had to write it down:

"Sometimes God takes our loved ones home to heal."
- Carrie R. Colorado

Your dear father is healed now - for eternity. :love:

[Moesha]

Hug that new baby girl of yours a bit tighter. I'm very sorry to read of your loss and that you weren't able to get to see him. Maybe you can take comfort in knowing that he didn't have years of terrible suffering to endure with the disease.

[Karen]

You and your family will be in our prayers.

[Randi]

I'm so sorry for your loss, Carmen. :( You have my deepest sympathy.

May your dad rest in peace!

[Cinder & Smoke]

:(
:(

You and the Family have my Deepest Sympathies.

May Dad Rest in Eternal Peace.

{{{Hugs}}} & :love:

[carole]

I am so sorry for your loss and send my sincere condolences at this very difficult and sad time in your life,i hope you can find some comfort here amongst your friends,we are here with you to help you through this,take care and giant hugs to all.:love::love:

[angelbow20]

Im sorry so sorry to hear about your father. My prayers are with you and your family.

[phesina]

My very deepest sympathy to you and your family on the loss of your beloved father.

May he rest in peace.

[anna_66]

My condolences to you and your family (((HUGS)))

[lizbud]

I am so sorry for your loss.:( Sorry you couldn't say your goodbyes
in person, but I know your Dad would understand. You have my deepest
sympathies.

[krazyaboutkatz]

I'm so sorry for your loss.:( You and your family are in my thoughts and prayers during this difficult time. Please take care. (((HUGS)))

[cassiesmom]

I'm so sorry Carmen.:( You'll be in my thoughts and prayers.

Mine, too. I am so sorry you couldn't be together again. Thinking and praying for you and your family,

Elyse

[zippy-kat]

Prayers of comfort on the way. I'm so sorry for your loss. :(

[Genny]

I'm so sorry about your dad and I'm sorry that you didn't get to tell him good-bye. I'm sure he knew how much he meant to you though; so don't worry about that. I know nothing anyone says is going to make you feel any better right now, but it's going to be alright. It will always hurt--you know that, but it will get easier as time passes, plus you've got that beautiful baby girl to take care of. :love:

[Pembroke_Corgi]

Oh, I am so very sorry. :( My thoughts continue to be with you and your family.

[gemini9961]

Carmen, I'm so sorry for your loss. :(

[Taz_Zoee]

:( I am so sorry for your loss. There is now an angel up there to watch over you and your family. Especially little Laura. My thoughts are with you and your family at this difficult time.

[kitten645]

I'm so very sorry. :(
Claudia

[DJFyrewolf36]

My prayers are with you *hugs*

[Husky_mom]

I´m so very sorry...my condolences to you and your family...

what slick said is right... perhaps it was not intended for you to see him in the end so you could remember him as the happy healthy person he once was and that memory is the one to remember...

when my grandparents (each on their own time) got ill and start going down the hill.. I kinda stopped seeing them.. many family members thought I was being a bad person and maybe I was in some way but I didn´t want to remember them looking that way,stuck in a bed, so sad, so helpless, so terminally ill.. and have that sad memory haunt me.. now I still remember them when they were full of joy and health and all those happy moments we had...

I think your father left knowing he was loved and that he would be remembered not as a sick person but as a full of life happy one and that even if you couldn´t be there in person you surely were there in spirit..

[jennielynn1970]

So sorry to read this Carmen. I hope you'll still be able to say goodbye to him when you go over (you're still going over?).

Take care, and big (((((((HUGS)))))) from me.

[Catherinedana]

Sending my deepest condolences to you and your family. Know that you are receiving much love and support from your friends on PT and that you are in our hearts. . .I hope that brings you a measure of solace.

Much love,
Cathy

[Cataholic]

I am so sorry that your father is gone. There are no words to say. You will be in my thoughts and prayers.

[Anikaca77]

I'm so sorry to hear about your Dad.

My prays are with you.

Melissa

[Laura's Babies]

I am SO sorry! You and your family have my sympathies. ((((HUGS))))) to you.

[Freedom]

I am very sorry to read this. Hugs to you and to all your family. Prayers for your Dad, RIP.

[phesina]

My very deepest sympathy to you, your family, and all who love him, on the loss of your beloved father.

Rest in peace, dearest dad, you are greatly loved and missed.

[ramanth]

I'm so sorry for your loss. :( :(

[Alysser]

Carmen, I am so so sorry for your loss :( Please accept my deepest condolences (((hugs))) and prayers going out to you! :love:

[beeniesmom]

Thank you everyone. I am overwhelmed by the replies. Your support is reassuring and calming to me. Everything will be ok.
I will show this to my mother when I see her. I spoke to her this morning and she is doing relatively well. She told me about all the people that came to visit with her. My brothers are being very strong for thier young age.
I feel guilty that I had him for 11 years more than them.

I will miss him so much.
My dad, Carlo, was a great man. He was loved by everyone who met him. He was such a generous and caring soul. He'd never turn his back to anyone.

When us kids were little, he'd bring us "na bella cosa" every evening. Either a candy or a small toy. He never said no to anything... except to dating before we were 18 :O.

When I lived in Italy, our home was/is close to several US Military bases. Every Sunday, and sometimes during the week, he would bring home a 'stray' military person and have them over for dinner. This was especially true during the holidays. He just couldn't bear the thought of someone spending a holiday alone.

I love you daddy. I will have so many stories to tell Laura about you. I will make sure she knew who you were.

We are still going to visit. Laura will definately be a distraction. It's hard to think about death when there is a new life around. I will help my mom.
We will help eachother. We will see what will be next for our family.

Thank you again.

[fritz03]

So sorry to hear of your Dad's passing,not easy losing a father you have had for your entire life,I still miss Dad even though it has been 2 and a half years,it will get better over time and you will feel better.

[Daisy and Delilah]

Carmen, bless you for posting. {{{{{MORE HUGS}}}}}

Your Dad sounds like a fabulous person. He is missed by all. I am so happy that Laura will know her Grandfather. I am still keeping you all in my thoughts and prayers for the difficult days ahead. I pray that God will give all of you the strength you need to get through them.:(

[popcornbird]

I'm so sorry to hear that your dad has left this world. :( I can only imagine how difficult it must be to have this happen, especially at a time of joy in welcoming a new life into your family. At the same time, it truly shows the reality of life. One day we're born, we live, we die. None of us will be here forever, and though it is so hard on the loved ones left behind, it also reminds us that one day, we too will be leaving this world.

My condolences are with you and your family. Laura will definitely grow up knowing her grandpa through your stories of him. I myself grew up with tremendous love for my paternal grandfather and maternal grandmother, both of whom I never had the opportunity to meet, but through my parents' loving stories of them. May Laura be a source of comfort for you and your family at this difficult time, and may the memories of your father bring you smiles through the tears, and help your hearts heal with time.

[prechrswife]

I'm so sorry for your loss. Praying for you and your family...:(