waiting for the chaplain to arrive

[caseysmom]

My daughter has been chosen to "die" in the every 15 minute program.

The California Highway Patrol and the Law Enforcement Chaplain are due to arrive at any minute to notify me that my child has been killed in an alcohol related collision.

Will I cry? It is wierd....has anyone else ever been involved?

Good news is she will be sequistered for 24 hours:D

[finn's mom]

Oh wow, I can't even imagine how you'll react! Be sure to share with us afterwards.

[Taz_Zoee]

I don't have children, but I've seen these on TV before and I'd probably cry. In fact I have cried watching the small blurbs on TV.
It's a very powerful thing.

[caseysmom]

They just came, I felt bad because I didn't cry....I knew it wasn't real and I couldn't pretend...after they told me I just sat there....I hope I am not the only mom that didn't cry how embarrasing...

There will be a parent vigil thing tonight and a funeral tomorrow...

[Laura's Babies]

I wouldn't ever want to PRETEND something like that happened... Gee whiz, that is the worst day in any mothers life...

I understand it needs to be done but I couldn't do it...

(I had that knock on the door one night and got that news.. I didn't cry, I was just to stunned)

[caseysmom]

I am sure it will be hard at the funeral...my daughter was mad that she didn't get to be one of them at the crash scene at the school...

one of my neighbors drove by when I was walking the chaplain to the door...who knows what he thinks...

[moosmom]

I had a cop come to my door and ask me if I was who I was. I said yes, and the cop said, "It's your Dad." I knew the day would come but it never EVER prepares you for what you are about to see or smell. And believe me, the sight and smell of death is something that stays with you forever.

I'm just glad this was only a practice. Mine was NOT a dress rehearsal, unfortunately.

[Medusa]

I couldn't do it. I wouldn't want to attract that situation to me in any form. You're made of stronger stuff than I.

[caseysmom]

I know what you mean Donna, I found my mom, 911 made me try to resucciteate her even though I knew it was too late.

Laura's babies...hugs...I can't even imagine, I am sorry if this thread reminded you of that night but if I can help one mother not get that knock I don't mind. I was glad I had the day off, otherwise they want to come to your work...two coworkers of mine got that knock at night so I would not have agreed to that.

I had front row tickets to the kings game tonight to see my favorite nba player of all time get his jersey retired but this meant a lot to my daughter.

Medusa...this is trying to NOT attract that situation, I think my daughter is learning a good lesson, she just got her licence 2 weeks ago.

My other daughter texted me that there is an obituary for my daughter in the hallway at school and there is a tombstone on the lawn. Parents don't get to go to the crash scene this afternoon.

[Medusa]

Medusa...this is trying to NOT attract that situation, I think my daughter is learning a good lesson, she just got her licence 2 weeks ago.



Oh I'm not finding fault w/her; just stating that I just wouldn't want to get that vibe going. As I said, she's made of stronger stuff than I. :)

[caseysmom]

One girl has to be taken to the morgue in a body bag and have her clothes cut off, two are life fighted to area hospitals and one boy is arrested and taken to jail so my daughters role in minimal compared to them.

[Taz_Zoee]

One girl has to be taken to the morgue in a body bag and have her clothes cut off, two are life fighted to area hospitals and one boy is arrested and taken to jail so my daughters role in minimal compared to them.

Have her clothes cut off!! :eek: No way!! The only way I'd be "ok" with that to happen is if I'm unconcious or dying. I would never agree to "act" that part of it out. I'm way too shy.:o

[caseysmom]

They tell that particular girl to wear modest underwear:o I would wear a bathing suit...well I wouldn't do it but if I was 17 and had a cute body thats what I would do :D

Its funny I am not sad at all I am sort of amused that she is sequistered by the California Highway Patrol and she is there problem for the evening...:eek:

[boomersooner]

Wow! That would sorta freak me out, but I think it will stick with these kids' for a long time, hopefully!!

[caseysmom]

They spend a lot of money on the program and there are statistics showing it helps...its actually not every 15 minutes anymore its more like 35 or 40 so that is good.

[Laura's Babies]

Laura's babies...hugs...I can't even imagine, I am sorry if this thread reminded you of that night but if I can help one mother not get that knock I don't mind.

It didn't remind me of that night and it was almost 27 years ago.. It's just having been through it, I couldn't pretend it happened with another child or grandchild.. THAT would bring back to many memories and I probably wouldn't be pretending anymore..

I understand where you are coming from in doing this.. This helps the kids realize it could be them or their friend and it NEEDS to be done, especially with Prom and graduation coming right on up. I take my hat off to you and all those who are playing the parts!

[Freedom]

I've never heard of this. Sent chills up my spine!

I remember soon after I got my license, there was a fatal car crash. I'm not sure if drinking was involved or not. Anyway, Dad took me to the yard to see the car. Strands of blond hair from one of the victims was blowing in the breeze, caught on the metal. I've never forgotten that.

[Edwina's Secretary]

Sent chills up my spine!



My feelings exactly. And I agree you are a very good sport to participate (but an nice reward -- you will know right where your daughter is tonight!)

[Lori Jordan]

I have never heard of this before in my life,I have been through one in real like just this past year,I was at my girlfriends house when the police showed up about her son,He sadly commited suicide..I freaked right out,That is not news i would want true or false...

When did they start this?I still think knowing its not true it would still send chills up my back.

[boomersooner]

I have a son who will be able to drive in a little over 2 years....We've told him just because he turns 16, that does not entitle him to a driver's license....but it does scare us to death to think of that time....Every parent has to go through it, but if programs like this can make an impression and make them think twice about things, then I think it is wonderful.

[kitten645]

Life is so karmic sometimes. Just last night, I came across some video's on Youtube about this program. I searched on my home town and found a video. Didn't have an explaination as to what this was about but the related video's did. I think it's an interesting concept. Sorta like "Scared straight". I wonder what sort of impact other role playing would make...like dealing/doing drugs? Or other problems a teen faces...pregnancy?
I saw a mom interviewed and said she was a basket case because "the mind plays tricks on you" which I totally understand. If you are put thru the motions, you would easily feel the emotions attached with that.
Good luck with your experience and I hope it helps.
Claudia

[DJFyrewolf36]

They started this at my high school after two seniors were involved in an alchohol related crash. I participated as a pall barer (sp?) at the "funeral" as it was one of my friends who was chosen to be the victim. It wasn't real but picking up the casket knowing that it very well could have been made me think for sure!

My dad told me, if I ever felt like I couldn't drive and no one else could give him a call. He has this policy now and I'm 26 lol. I will have this policy with my son no matter how old he is!

[Medusa]

I saw a mom interviewed and said she was a basket case because "the mind plays tricks on you" which I totally understand. If you are put thru the motions, you would easily feel the emotions attached with that. Claudia

That's what I would be afraid of. My powers of visualization are too keen sometimes and if "what you see is what you get" would apply here, then I'd be outpicturing it for myself. I do believe, though, that it's a program that serves a good purpose and I admire the people who can participate w/no "side effects" but only a lesson learned. :)

[caseysmom]

We had the parent retreat last night. I got to see the tombstones. I did not get my daughters obituary, the chaplain forgot to give that to me, that seemed to upset a lot of parents so I'm glad I didn't receive it.

The chaplains are in training so this is part of their training also.

Today is the funeral, I was told to get there early so I won't be trampled getting into the gym. They pick two letters and ask you to read the letter you wrote your child, I hope I don't get picked I'm not sure I could get through that.

[Taz_Zoee]

Every time I even come to this thread to get current on it, I get choked up.

[AdoreMyDogs]

I've never heard of this. Sent chills up my spine!


Me too. Wow. This is a good message to send out but it would be hard for me to go through.

[caseysmom]

We had the "funeral" today...

A local mom whose daughter was hit in front of her school by a drunk driver spoke, there wasn't a dry eye in the house. Here is a liink

http://www.kcra.com/news/2679272/detail.html

the mother now speaks at lots of area high schools

[Taz_Zoee]

Oh my. I definitely would have been bawling. Such a beautiful life taken way to early. :(

[caseysmom]

Sharmelia was an honor student with a scholarship and was heading off to medical school. Her senior portraits had been taken but she never go to see them.

She shoved her sister out of the way and took the full impact of the suv.