I quit my job...

[slleipnir]

I hope I made the right choice, but I sure feel awful about it.

I'm not sure if anyone remembers me talking about the problems I had at my work in the past with the manager and cook?

Well all that cooled down and I hadn't worked with Cook for a long time so I actually started to enjoy my job. We had a new guy start working there 3-4 weeks ago. He's a very friendly guy..but he doesn't like to hear when he doesn't do stuff. And that's a lot. Everyday since he's been there I've had to clean up after him. The first few weeks I let it slide as he's new and needs to learn these things. Perfectly understandable. I've asked him to try and keep the tables (I work in a pub/resturant) tidy. We have little Corona 6 pack boxes which we put silverware/salt peper etc in. The menus stay on the table. I asked him if he could put all the silverware in one area, it looks neater then having one silverware per beer slot. Also that the menus face the same way and are arranged neatly instead of all over the table. He never does that and I now believe he puts the silverware that way just to bug me. You should have seen the look he gave me when I asked if he could do it that way. What's wrong with being tidy? That wasn't THAT big of a deal, I just asked if he'd mind.

Also, he never mops the floor after his shift. It always has stains and dirty when I come in. The beer first isn't stocked well, he leaves empty pop bottles and beer around. He doesn't restock napkins, popcorn, juice, pop. The other day someone wanted a bottle of pepsi...well, there wasn't any in the fridge! I had to tell them we didn't have any. I went to make a drink, but there was no juice. I served someone a meal and there was not enough silverware in the box. The ketchup tops aren't washed...That's gross. Who wants to get ketchup from a restaurant with a dirty lid?? Someone comes in first thing and wants change for the gambling machines...however, I have $25.00 in $5.00 bills so I can't give them any without going upstairs first. Honestly I can go on and on. This isn't just one day, this is everyday. I told the manager about it and she basically said to put up with it. She said people don't stick around long so not to tell him anything. WTF?! Why should *I* have to do it?! So I said whatever and just left all the stuff he didn't do for his next shift. Today I come in to the same BS. I ask my mom (former manager) what to do. She said ask for a meeting to get all the duties straighted away. I said sounds fair. So I go up and ask. She says "WHAT did he do NOW" I told her, and said just to go over the rules as maybe he doesn't know and it would be better coming from the manager then me. She said I'm way to nit picky with everything and I should give him a break.

I was upset in general that day. I was tired of coming into this everyday. So when she said that it made me feel that she really doesn't care about my feelings or thoughts. I know I'm a big baby and I cry over small things but sometimes I can't help it. She took me into her office and told me I need to get a backbone and can't cry over everything. I told her I have a medical condition. She asked what does that have to do with crying over everything? I asked if she had ever heard of depression. She said of course. I said she obviously doesn't understand what it is as I've been struggling with it for a long time. She told me I need to leave my problems at the door when I come to work. I said that's not how it works. Then she said I need to give the new guy a break and not be so hard on him. I told her I have nothing against him, I think he's a great guy and a hard worker, but it's only fair that he does his share of the work. He's been here long enough to know by now. He's getting worse if anything, not better. Then she said the reason all the other girls quit was because the couldn't live up to me and my moms "perfection" with everything. I'm sorry I love my customers. It's what I'm there for, and I believe if they're going to spend time in my work then it needs to be clean and organized. It's the least I can do for them. I could be a LOT more anal I often let things slide that wasn't that big of a deal...but why should I have to suffer everyday for his sake? I've been there for 5 years and him 3-4 weeks, so why does he get treated like royalty? After all that i've done for the place this is how I get treated. I told her I quit. She seemed happy. Oh yeah she also told me how am I suppose to do anything with my life when all I do is cry.

I'm sorry for venting all this silly stuff. In the end I feel I did the wrong thing. I should have sucked it up. It really wasn't the end of the world. Oh well. Thanks for listening. Thank you for being there for me. It's nice to know I have SOME people in my life who truly care.

[RobiLee]

Aww, Audrey I don't even know what to say right now. I'm so sorry that this has happened and that you are feeling so bad. Just know that I care and I'm thinking about you and sending big hugs your way.

{{{HUGS}}}

[lizbud]

I think you did the right thing for you. There are many other jobs
where conscientious workers are valued. That manager would be fired
if it were my place of business. Don't be so hard on yourself. :)

[Karen]

Do not beat yourself up over this. It's not like this was a job you wanted to be in long-term, with career potential, right? It sounds like it's a good time to make a break and get on with life in a positive direction.

[Muddy4paws]

there is nothing worse than being treated rubbish in your job, Especially when others are treated better for doing less.

Things will work out for you

[Taz_Zoee]

I'm sorry it came to the point that you quit your job. Here's my question: If you didn't pick up the slack for him, who would have? Nobody? So those things would have just gone undone?
That is NO way to run a business, so I think the problem lies with the manager. She has had it too easy with you there working your butt off to make the place what it is.
Let's just see what happens after you are gone. Wait a few weeks and go back there and just see how it looks. I'm sure it will be a mess. Unless they find another person like you to do everything.
It's so sad that people who care are the ones that get crapped on in the end. I have a similar situation at my work, but it doesn't involve me. It's just ridiculous!
I have no doubt that with your work ethic you will find another job. Somewhere the deserves and appreciates you for the hard worker that you are.

[pitc9]

I think you did the right thing.
You tried to make things better, but they never were going to get better because the guy wouldn't do anything to change his messy ways.

Work is work... we all know that and life is not always a bowl of cherries, but you shouldn't have to suffer everyday at your job.
I did for 2 years, I'd get so pissed driving to work (1 hour) just thinking about how much I hated the job, then spend my hour long drive home each night crying!
IT'S NOT WORTH IT!

{{{HUGS}}}

[Jessika]

What restaurant is this so I can make sure I NEVER stop by there and tell others not to, either?

Because I certainly would not want to eat at a restaurant where countertops where food is prepared is left dirty, silverware not washed, and floors not mopped. They would have so many violations... personally if it were me as a customer, I would have called state on them so fast...

Don't worry, you did the right thing!! As a customer that attitude FROM THE MANAGER would have APPALLED me!

[slleipnir]

I'm sorry it came to the point that you quit your job. Here's my question: If you didn't pick up the slack for him, who would have? Nobody? So those things would have just gone undone?
That is NO way to run a business, so I think the problem lies with the manager. She has had it too easy with you there working your butt off to make the place what it is.
Let's just see what happens after you are gone. Wait a few weeks and go back there and just see how it looks. I'm sure it will be a mess. Unless they find another person like you to do everything.
It's so sad that people who care are the ones that get crapped on in the end. I have a similar situation at my work, but it doesn't involve me. It's just ridiculous!
I have no doubt that with your work ethic you will find another job. Somewhere the deserves and appreciates you for the hard worker that you are.

Yeah it wasn't getting done at all. It bugs me to see stains on the floor, or menu's sloppily thrown on the tables...so I fix it or clean up. My dad is a management consultant. It's his job to help people better run their businesses. He even says she's a terrible manager. Infact she has really no managerial skills at all. He said he has seen managers come and go from my work for over 30 years and she is by far the worse.

[dukedogsmom]

I am so happy you did that! That's one of the best things you could have done for yourself as I believe it was highly contributing to your lack of confidence and depression. I hope you can find a place that you can be appreciated for the truly great person you are!

[joycenalex]

no matter what that wuss manager said, you leaving was the best thing for YOU. there are other jobs, and you've learned what a bad job is, now with some time and job hunting you'll learn what a good job is. ((hugs))

[Ginger's Mom]

Wow, I cannot believe the manager spoke to you like that. You did the right thing for you.

[Catty1]

Oh, sweetie, I remember past posts of yours where it was sheer HELL for you there!

It is very brave of you to leave...maybe that place will sink without you there. Heck, you and your mom could run a nice coffee and sandwich shop and put that place to shame!

I also have clinical depression - and for the past three years was working in very toxic places. I also thought I had to fix it all, and it made me miserable.

I still struggle with a depressive and ADD brain...but it makes SUCH a difference if your employers are real human beings and kind to boot!

A friend of mine suggested I see if I can get referred to an occupational therapist. I never knew what they do - but they help you find the kind of environment that is best for you where you can do your job.

Hmmm....I still like the coffee shop idea! Your artwork on the wall, a percentage of each work going to your favourite animal rescue...hmmmm. ;)

HUGS to you. Don't look or go back...and take a good week off to yourself before you start looking again. Add some dark chocolate and bubble baths to the mix!

Forward! :)

[Bengalz]

The hardest decisions we make in life are often the best ones :) I admire your principle and wish more people in service industries understood as well as you do the meaning of customer service.

Please don't beat yourself up; find a way to celebrate and know that you've just opened the door to better opportunities. Take the time to recover your confidence and don't look back. Whatever happens at your previous employment is no longer your problem.

There is something much better around the corner - don't be afraid to find it

:)

[K9karen]

The hardest decisions we make in life are often the best ones :) I admire your principle and wish more people in service industries understood as well as you do the meaning of customer service.

Please don't beat yourself up; find a way to celebrate and know that you've just opened the door to better opportunities. Take the time to recover your confidence and don't look back. Whatever happens at your previous employment is no longer your problem.

There is something much better around the corner - don't be afraid to find it

:)


Beautifully said! Audrey, take all this advise to heart.

I was going to comment on your "manager" but we've all been there. And, you don't cry because you're "a big baby", you cry from FRUSTRATION. At least I do. You can only do so much. You need to take care of YOU!

[gini]

So many of the comments you have already received are so right on! You are a person with ethics and integrity - don't ever EVER, let anyone wear that side of you down. You are unique and valuable!

Ha - it sure sounds like this place will go down hill rapidly - more than it is now - leaving the duties to the manager and her employee. Their loss - certainly not yours!

There are good things ahead of you - people who will appreciate and value who you are and compensate you appropriately for your hard work.

Now get out there (after a rest for a while) and find that job. And never look back!

[slleipnir]

The silverware is actually washed. We roll them and leave them on the tables in a empty 6 pack box of Corona. He is just sloppy about it. There would be 2 in on part and on the other side the would be 3. The other day I noticed there was even unwrapped silverware which I know for a fact people think is gross. I KNOW it's not the biggest problem but the fact is it's messy and unprofessional looking. I honestly couldn't believe how little she cared about this. She was more concerned about keeping this new guy and letting him off the hook then actually telling him to be clean. Because it would make her life hell if he were to quit...you know, she'd have to hire someone which guess who would have to train?? I've never in my life heard of such a thing as this. She asked me what could possibly be SO bad that something needs to be done. She made it seem like I'm asking because it's effecting *me* and just me. Yes it does, but most important is the customers. I know no one complains, I wouldn't either. If I went to a pub and it was sloppy I would leave and never come back. I wouldn't bother to complain. So many of our travelers (It's also a motel) complain about her. There aren't Many who talk nicely about her. Most of them moved hotels but still come to the bar. Why? Because they love my mom who always works when they're in. Pretty sure they won't be in again.

She truly has no clue how to manage a business. *I* could do a better job. To be honest, the hotel chain is for sale and will problem close down this fall. The owner was the only one who cared about the place (besides maybe me and my mom, it seems) and since he died it's gone down hill. My mom went to headoffice once. A guest complained. Manager denied what guest complained about. Head office called and asked Manager if it happened. She said the guy was drunk. So mom called and said she had served the guy, he wasn't drunk. Head office calls back asks if this is true, Manager again lies. Headoffice believes manager. It's sooo ridiculous.

Oh and did I tell you about our x-mas party? That was right around the time I had the other trouble with the cook. Manager gave almost everyone a xmas gift...but me. And one of the night shift guys. Honestly, who does that? I didn't want the gift but still, not the point. I would NEVER do that even if I hated the person with a passion. I'd wait till they left or I'd buy everyone something.

I could go on and on with the BS that goes on in this place. I bet anything she will say crap to my regulars that isn't true about why I quit. She'd probably tell them I was fired. Thankfully most of them know her for what she is. I will miss my customers. They were the only thing keeping me there for so long. Can you believe she'd take the guy whose been there 3-4 weeks over someone being there 5? Or in my moms case - 30?! They see us as problems because we stand up for what we feel is wrong.

Anyway I'll shut up about it. Thank you so much everyone for listening to me. I wish there was something I could do to show you my appreciation. Hopefully someday I'll make it to a PT meeting so I can thank you properly :rolleyes:

[Rachel]

Audrey, personally I think you handled yourself exceptionally well through everything which has transpired. Your work ethic is so admirable, your expectations of what is reasonable are right on, and your manager's sense of her own job is pathetic. You were in a no win situation and like has already been noted, you are an employee who would be appreciated by a business with competent management. I know it makes you feel crazy to work for someone with such a distorted sense of organization and quality of service. But YOU are not the crazy one. Your instincts are ever so good. Don't look back. You are able to articulate what you can offer another employer and the right one will think he/she died and went to heaven when given the opportunity to interview you.

YOU GO GIRL!

[anna_66]

Audrey I'm glad you've finally gotten out of that place. You are too good to be working there any way.
I'm sure your going to find a much better job where they appreciate you.

[Sevaede]

Aww, do not feel bad! :) I can certainly empathize with you on the crappy job.

I agree with the "seize this opportunity" idea. :D Go back to school! :D Or something else that makes you happy.

[slleipnir]

I don't know that I did handle it that well. I don't think crying like an idiot would count as such lol! I really hate that about myself. I'm VERY sensitive. In fact - too sensitive. I think if she hadn't have said something degrading I probably wouldn't have been upset. I think I do have a major lack of confidence and it shows when someone belittles me. I do believe the things she says even if deep down I know it's not true. I'm not sure how to just move on and not care what people think of me. My dad is an excellent example for this. He doesn't take crap from anyone, nor does he care what anyone thinks of him. Why can't I have a little of that? :rolleyes: For some reason it bugs me when I know someone doesn't like me. Do you think I'm full of it??

I was thinking of applying at a couple Vet Clinics. I highly doubt they would take people off the street with no training but it can't hurt to try. I can't remember if I told anyone here or not, but I'm trying to get into school to become a Vet Tech. I've volunteered at clinics but hands on experience would be the best I think.

[Kfamr]

Actually, I have to say you did everything RIGHT. You put up with his for a long as you could, you tried, but when you get no support from the higher-ups, you can't put up with much. You did nothing wrong.


I am proud of you for ending this job. I know you loved it in general but all of the crap they put you through was too much. You deserve much more respect than that.


{{HUGS}} and congrats, here's to moving on! :)

[wolf_Q]

{{Hugs}} I think you did the right thing. Your job was a major source of stress in your life, which you didn't need. You'll find a better job, I'm sure of it. I know how you feel, the times I've been ready to quit my job was because of co-workers. I was told by a manager once that I "didn't matter" because I was "just a bather" (at the time, I'm a groomer now, but every employee should matter to a manager, I had worked there for a couple of years at that point too). :rolleyes: Good luck with finding a job at a vet! :)

[Kater]

I was thinking of applying at a couple Vet Clinics. I highly doubt they would take people off the street with no training but it can't hurt to try.

They certainly DO hire people without prior experience. I can't speak for Canada specifically...but in general it is a field with high turnover and good work ethic can get you far (even when experience is lacking). Granted you'll start at the "bottom", but that is where you start with most jobs. I say go for it! :D

[shais_mom]

that totally sucks -
I hope you can find a new better job soon.
I too cry over the drop of a hat so I sympathasize funny enough my dad sounds just like your dad - he doesn't take anything crap - and I feel like a piece of carpet where people have walked all over me! I say to myself a lot - why can't I be more like him??

[KYS]

I think you have great work ethics and take pride in your job.
Some people just do the minimal.
What ever job you find, they will be lucky to get you.
((HUGS))

[slleipnir]

It's actually a little funny, you know..The reason she probably doesn't care about stuff being clean is that she herself is not clean. She always smells of BO. (hasn't been as bad lately. Probably because it's winter) It's absolutely disgusting. LOL someone gave her soaps and stuff for a present once and she gave it away to the staff :rolleyes: Don't think she took the hint.

[Catty1]

Staci and Audrey - ask your dads what their secret is, and please let me know!

Reminds me of something someone told me years ago:

"I don't mind being a doormat - but I draw the line at wall-to-wall carpeting." :D