I need some advice. [Archive]

petslover

12-29-2007, 11:28 PM

Okay, My parents 25th wedding anniversary will be approaching next summer. I want to have a gathering for them with our family & close family friends. I am a college student so right now money is tight. The gathering is going to be really casual.. as that what my family is.. no dressy dressy. or anything.. at gatherings our family just talks and gossips and what not. haha.. noone in my family really drink alcohol either.

I know for one I am going to get them a cake for a local cake service..maybe even some sort of wedding cake.. depends on how much it costs.

but for the food I'm stumped.. do I feed the guest a whole meal? or would finger foods work (sandwiches, chips, etc.. ) PS- I have never cooked a meal in my life so I don't think the party is a good place to start..lol.. so I would have to get it catered by a local restaurant.

I know I am going to decorate the place with silver balloons, table clothes, etc. I am also going to place some pictures out from their wedding.

I also want to get some sort of favors that the guest can take home with them and maybe treasure. i'm not sure what to get though.

I'm really stumped on how to begin this process..

any advice would be really appreciated.

rg_girlca

12-29-2007, 11:57 PM

Hi Tia. :)

Since things are basically going to be casual, why don't you ask family members to make up certain dishes to bring. Like, macaroni salads, finger sandwiches, cheese & crackers, raw vegetables with dip, or their favorite types of dishes that they like to make. Stuff that is easy to do a buffet style with.

The cake doesn't necessarily have to be a wedding cake. We got our parents a cake decorated with flowers and just had written, Happy 25th anniversary on it. But we did add a little bride and groom to it.

That's all I can think of.

Lizzie

12-30-2007, 12:04 AM

How many guests are you talking about? That will make a big difference in suggestions.

Lobodeb

12-30-2007, 12:14 AM

Hi Tia!

I would suggest, first seeing if any of your other family members can pitch in to see what kind of a budget you have. Are you going to have it in a banquet hall, veterans' hall, house, etc.? From there, you can get together a guest list and try having people bring dishes like rg_girlca suggested. If not, depending on where you are, I'm sure pizza restaurants cater for decent prices. I also know a great cake designer (me :o) so I can help you with pricing to see what's a deal for you or not.

Either way, you're on the right track by starting early. I used to be an event planner, so if you need anymore help, please let me know.

Kfamr

12-30-2007, 12:14 AM

Easiest thing to do - supply hamburgers, hot dogs, buns, etc. and ask everyone to bring a dish to pass.

Maya & Inka's mommy

12-30-2007, 03:27 AM

In 2006 we had our parents 60th anniversary. I made all the invitations, the menu's, and a large mozaïk with pics from them. This was a huge success! It is NOT expensive, because you can make it yourself. The only thing I could not do, was make the large finished print.

This is the finished product
http://users.pandora.be/bernardgabriels/images/jub7.jpg

If this is to much work, you can also consider making what I made for our own 25th anniversary in 2004:
http://users.pandora.be/bernardgabriels/images/jubileum.jpg

have fun, tia!!!

emily_the_spoiled

12-30-2007, 08:03 AM

For my parents 40th wedding anniversary we gave the a chance to renew their wedding vows (they are Catholic). Then we had an afternoon tea at the church hall for all of the friends and family. For the immediate family, we then had a small sit down dinner in the evening.

For the tea, we had some of my mother's friends make all the goodies (and no sandwiches)

Good luck and I know that they will appreciate anything you do.

Freedom

12-30-2007, 08:45 AM

Like ou, when my folks were married 25 years, I was in college.

I sent out semi invites. I invited everyone to join us at a restaurant for a pay your own way dinner. I explained that I needed a count for the table reservations.

Didn't have to make up a menu, everyone ate what they liked (none of this I hate fish!), and everyone spent as much or as little as they wanted. Some bought a bottle of wine for a group of them, others didn't. Had about 35 people, the restaurant I picked was centrally located to those invited, a place most of us had been to once or twice but not regularly as it was a bit expensive for a routine. So this made it all special. We were enough people that the restaurant gave us a side room to ourselves. They set the tables in a E shape, so everyone could chat with lots and lots of folks, not just 8 at a table. I did get some favors for place settings, and the cake. I got the cake from the restaurant, so I didn't even have to travel with that!

It was all I could do to gather enough funds to pay 4 dinners: mom, dad, baby brother and me!

BTW, don't know what you family is like. I made one HUGE mistake. I did not take a peak at the wedding album. I didn't invite the Best Man and his wife, until after a bit word got around and someone called and told me my Dad's cousin had been Best Man and I had slipped up. I had to make a very quick phone call. Long story short, they did NOT come to the party, and never spoke to me again, to the day they both died. :(

I didn't give the folks a present; the party WAS my present to them. It was a surprise until bout an hour before, when we were getting ready to go out, and I insisted Mom wear a dress she had wonr only once, to someone's wedding. And I asked Dad to wear a suit. They knew something was up at that point.

Good Luck!

Rachel

12-30-2007, 09:30 AM

Your family sounds like my kind of people. Personally, I would suggest getting some sliced roast beef, ham, etc. and cheeses from the deli to go on the little dinner rolls (also a variety) with a variety of mustard, mayo, butter, horse radish, pickles, olives, etc. Add a nice pasta salad, baked beans, vegetable platter with dip, chips, carrot salad....you get the idea. You could ask some of the closest family members to bring some of those dishes. The rest you can order from the deli section at the grocery store. Don't try to do it all yourself, but you be the one to organize and make sure that all the pieces are fit together.

As for the cake, I would suggest concentrating on ordering a really good cake concentrating on taste rather than fancy dancy ornamentation. To me it is a shame to decorate to the hilt something that tastes ordinary. Have a bakery make some suggestions and see if they have a sample of what they would suggest.

I would also make sure you have a good variety of beverages to go with the food and coffee for the cake. Flatwear, dishes, napkins, and have your camera ready for plenty of pictures so you can make an album for remembrances of the occasion.

zippy-kat

12-30-2007, 09:41 AM

Everyone's touched on food so I'll touch on the momento...

A cheap -but nice- way to go would be to buy a votive candle and design a "(Name) & (Name) 25th Anniversary" label. You could print the labels from your computer or have them printed up. Want it dressier? Buy some tulle fabric (hit the "scrap" bin at your fabric shop), cut into squares, place candle in center, gather fabric at top, and tie with a bow!

Guests could use or keep their gift.

Congrats to the 'rents and good luck on the party!!

joycenalex

12-30-2007, 09:49 AM

i helped organize a wedding this summer. i found that wedding cakes from bakeries are beyond awful expensive....$2 a slice? and i have to pay for a 1 inch by 1 inch taste piece? b/c it was a wedding cake? rip offs in my opinion. i called around to several grocery stores that had bakeries....krogers, meijers, andersons and giant eagle locally, asked for and got tastes (when i was there at the store :cool: ) and got a huge sheet cake from giant eagle for just $45. it served the 100 people who were at the party, and the decorations were fine, the taste was great and i'd use that bakery again in a second. for favors, well they didn't appeal to me, mostly from past wedding/anniversary parties i found the favors are expensive and unless you're really really tight with the couple, the favors wind up in goodwill asap. for the wedding this summer, we bought disposable cameras, 1-2 for each table and had paid for photo finishing for each camera. we made photo cds from those those cameras, so each one got photos of their loved ones dressed up a bit. matches, with silver names and dates are useful. can be used for candles as the year goes by, those small silver votives are cool, they do twinkle beautifully, and m&m will do chocolate bars with the couples names/dates on them. finger foods are fine. non alcoholic punch is good. and i love the idea of a mosaic of the original wedding party, way cool.

carole

12-30-2007, 03:25 PM

what a lovely daughter you are to go to so much trouble to planning this special event, if i were you i would ask everyone to bring a plate of food, that is what we do in NZ, when money is tight, as they are family members no-one should mind, have a list of things, and tell each member what you would like them to bring so you don't double up on things,but finger food is the way to go i think if you want to keep to the budget. :)

I agree with the others, concentrate on getting a really yummy cake, that not only looks great but tastes divine.

caseysmom

12-30-2007, 03:55 PM

What a nice gesture. If you have access to a sam's club they have excellent cake for very reasonable, they may even have wedding cakes.

I like the idea of everyone bringing a dish and like Kay said burgers and hot dogs can be provided. If you don't have access to a barbeque you could buy a bunch of chicken.

petslover

12-30-2007, 06:03 PM

joycenalex

12-30-2007, 06:49 PM

start buying the dry goods now, a little at a time hurts less, get good sturdy boxes with lids to store the evidence offsite. half sheet cake shouldn't run more then $25. get a high quality silver knife and server to pass the cakes. those will become heirlooms i bet. go to a gordons' food service and buy silver plates, small and large as well as forks, spoons, knives. get the napkins made at the same place you get the candles and match books at, and if you're going to use them for invites as well, you're in a strong position, drive a bargain. their names and 25 in silver would be nice. what color was your moms' attendants wearing? those might be nice plates colors or table cloth colors. 15 ish people means 2 or 3 long tables and chairs, could the ladies at your church or your M&Ds' friends help with set up/tear down. get huge trash bags as well, it's amazing how much trash you'll generate. and trash bags can hold the ice for the sodas, ice teas, waters. if you're going for a surprise, get one of the other people to 'remove' M&D about 3 hours before the event, you need the set up time, and you will also need to shower and get ready yourself. if you're planning on going into the evening time, a store called old time pottery sells flare bowls for under a dollar, buy some of their flattened marbles, no more then $1.50per bag, one flare bowl, 2 bags of flat marbles per flare bowl (i used the extra flare bowls and marbles as holiday gifts this year, i stuck a fancy christmas candle in them, they looked good with the marbles and holiday greenery.) to surround the citronellas or votives and if you can put a few citronella candles out to discourage the flying blood suckers , the lights will reflect very nicely on the marbles. the disposable cameras you can also buy them a few at a time, at walgreens or CVS. maybe buy the bowls at yard sales/goodwill as well and the
any time you can , eat BBQ, in my opinion, BUT what do your M&D like? it's their party. go down early in the year, talk to the head waitress, tell her what you're thinking and she can help alot if you need more help, and make sure their price includes service utensils and delievery. if you need more help PM me, i kinda do this on the side

Lobodeb

12-31-2007, 12:48 AM

i found that wedding cakes from bakeries are beyond awful expensive....$2 a slice? and i have to pay for a 1 inch by 1 inch taste piece? b/c it was a wedding cake? rip offs in my opinion. i called around to several grocery stores that had bakeries....krogers, meijers, andersons and giant eagle locally, asked for and got tastes (when i was there at the store :cool: ) and got a huge sheet cake from giant eagle for just $45. it served the 100 people who were at the party, and the decorations were fine, the taste was great and i'd use that bakery again in a second.

It's important to note that most grocery store bakeries' cakes are made from box mixes and frozen weeks in advance and their "buttercream" is made from shortening, which is why it has that nasty, greasy flavor (or lack of). Please consider that if you do order from a bakery, chances are that a) your cake most likely wasn't frozen (depending on the standards of that particular bakery), b) that it's made from scratch, no boxes and c) that they use higher quality ingredients, i.e., butter rather than shortening. And that's just talking about the product itself, not labor. I charge more than $2 a slice and hardly feel like I'm ripping people off because of what I just mentioned. I know budget needs to be taken into consideration, I just felt the need to justify the costs. Actually, $2 a slice is a steal. JMO

caseysmom

12-31-2007, 01:04 AM

It's important to note that most grocery store bakeries' cakes are made from box mixes and frozen weeks in advance and their "buttercream" is made from shortening, which is why it has that nasty, greasy flavor (or lack of). Please consider that if you do order from a bakery, chances are that a) your cake most likely wasn't frozen (depending on the standards of that particular bakery), b) that it's made from scratch, no boxes and c) that they use higher quality ingredients, i.e., butter rather than shortening. And that's just talking about the product itself, not labor. I charge more than $2 a slice and hardly feel like I'm ripping people off because of what I just mentioned. I know budget needs to be taken into consideration, I just felt the need to justify the costs. Actually, $2 a slice is a steal. JMO

From the pictures you have shown your cakes are really special I am sure they taste great too. I hate buttercream I prefer the whipped frosting probably because the buttercream is made from poor ingredients.

jennielynn1970

12-31-2007, 04:45 AM

I like the ideas of having people bring a covered dish, side dish or what have you. We do that at family reunions, but anyone who travels a distance isn't expected to have to bring anything. The BBQ or picnic thing sounds great too. You can get family size packages of hamburgers or hotdogs at many of the supermarkets (around here we have Redner's and Giant that offer good deals). There are always family members that are known for their macaroni salad or baked beans, they might even feel honored that you asked them to make that certain dish for the occasion.

Do you have a friend who's mom or family member makes cakes? Is there a local shop near you that does cakes and baked goods? Some of the local bakeries in my area offer such nice cakes, and they aren't expensive at all.

If you can't get family members to help out with the cooking, could you get some college friends to help you out?? They might like to spend the day at your place, helping with food and all of that. You can make that punch with juice, ginger ale or 7 up and sherbet. That's always a something nice to have at picnics and get togethers where you don't want to serve alcohol. You could also get some bottles of sparkling cider, which tastes really good, and looks just as pretty and fizzy as champagne.

Hope it all works out for you! It's so nice of you to put it together!

joycenalex

12-31-2007, 07:46 AM

lobodeb, i wasn't trying to insult you, and if so, i apologize. the cake was almond flavored with whipped cream frosting and i called to have it made the 2 days before the event, they wouldn't make it without a payment upfront. the baker turned out to be a former church friend. maybe here in columbus, the grocery bakery choices are pretty wide and there for fresher then other areas of the country. (a co-workers hubby makes the breads at krogers , ever since i could smell the yeastiness of freshly made buns and bread at their factory just off the main highway i've thought he was more interesting...i never met a carb i didn't love.. ;) ) and i'm so with you on the buttercream issue, massive yuck. and for my event $2 a person was way too much. now, can you ship cakes to me here in columbus....... ;) :D , yours are lovely.

jennielynn1970

12-31-2007, 04:06 PM

the cake was almond flavored with whipped cream frosting and i called to have it made the 2 days before the event, they wouldn't make it without a payment upfront.

I'm surprised any bakery would make a cake for an event on such short notice. I know you can find a cake at most supermarkets and they just have to inscribe what you want on the top, but bakery cakes, from my experience, are really worth that little extra if your occasion is a special one. The one bakery in my area makes gorgeous airbrushed designs and has all kinds of mousse fillings available as well. Their whipped cream frosting is to die for too! Yumm!!! I ordered a cake there to share at my one school when I turned 30. It had a hazelnut mousse filling and was just out of this world good! I need to do that again, come to think of it!

kitten645

12-31-2007, 11:16 PM

I have two words for you.....
MARTHA STEWART....LOL
Her website is full of great ideas.. :p

Lobodeb

01-01-2008, 07:00 PM

lobodeb, i wasn't trying to insult you, and if so, i apologize.

Oh, no! You didn't insult me at all. I just wanted to justify the pricing. But I appreciate the apology.

As far as shipping goes, I saw on TV that I can fly cakes to various locations and am looking into costs. :D I have a few family events this summer in New Mexico that I can't attend, so I'm trying to send cakes instead.

Lobodeb

01-01-2008, 07:01 PM

From the pictures you have shown your cakes are really special I am sure they taste great too. I hate buttercream I prefer the whipped frosting probably because the buttercream is made from poor ingredients.

Thanks! Have you ever tried "true" buttercream? I mean the one that's made from butter and not shortening? YUMMY!!!

sabies

01-01-2008, 10:56 PM

I love buttercream frosting, the sweeter the better. I think I've had both real and shortening cause I've had good and bad and there is a distinct difference. I prefer bakery anything. The fact that it's more expensive and less convenient is good - keeps the waistline from expanding.

If you do a bbq perhaps an invitee would be willing to do cooking so it would be less work for you?

Good luck with whatever you decide Tia!

caseysmom

01-01-2008, 11:57 PM

Thanks! Have you ever tried "true" buttercream? I mean the one that's made from butter and not shortening? YUMMY!!!

Probably at weddings, usually wedding cakes are really yummy.

shais_mom

01-02-2008, 02:10 AM

Thanks for all of the replies. I have been reading them. I would guess about 15 ppl..

Well, some of our extended family our having problems at the moment.. soo I can't really ask them to bring anything.. Just them being there is enough.

I do like getting a cake & having it decorated with flowers.. That sounds nice.

We will be having it at our house..

Lut, I love those frames.. I really am looking at the 2nd one..

I like the candle idea.. That would be really really cool & I also like the photo touching idea.

Okay,. I was wondering if the menu could be ham/turkey sandwiches, macroni salad, & baked beans,and of course cake. .. or would that be tacky for the 25th?

Thank you all for your help.. it is making my planning much easier.

If that's tacky for a 25th I'm in trouble b/c that is what we did for our parents 40th!! :eek:
I don't know if you guys have Arby's restaraunts down south but if you do - check them out - you can get their roast beef and ham for sandwiches with the fixings and buns for pretty decently priced.
That is what we did for our parents 40th.
I had my aunts/cousin's bake sheet cakes. And we had one decorated cake from a grocery. And we went to Gordon Foods and got potato salad and macaroni salad. Course I had help, my sister is 6 years older than me, and my uncles and aunts helped put tables up and decorate. My sister and I covered the cost but its hard to do that when your sibling is under 2!! :D

pitc9

01-02-2008, 09:29 AM

For my in-laws ann. party a few years back I ordered candy wrappers off of E-Bay. They were quite cheap and they looked great!
You can have anything you want printed on them and they fit perfectly on Hershey's miniatures.

There's nothing wrong with just having snacks and appetizers just as long as you let people know in the invites!

petslover

01-02-2008, 11:24 AM

Okay, great. thanks for all the advice.

This is what my decisions are right now.

Having it a picnic sounds fun.. If it rains, it can be moved to our house. no biggie about that.

We will be having chicken strip party tray by chickfila, potato salad, & baked beans & of course drinks..& utensils and a cake..

I will be getting decorations. I went & looked at some cute things in town this week. I got a few ideas.

The party favors are going to be candy wrappers. Thats fantastic.

I wrote down an estimate on who to invite. not an actual count.. This isn't going to be a suprise, as my family works out of town alot on the weekends.. I have to make sure my parents stay in town that day. Its going to be the Saturday before their anniversary.

I am trying to find something that the guest can sign. I seen a big plate at the store that people can sign that says happy anniversary on it.. but I didn't care for that to much. It was to heavy and big. It would end up getting broken sooner or later.. I think.

I know at my graduation party I got a stuffed animal that everyone signed. I still have it till this day. It really means alot to me. so I want to do something like that for them.

I pretty much have done all that I can do now. I'm going to start shopping in March during my spring break & the actual anniversary isn't until june..I don't have to get that many decorations since its outside.. so i have plenty of time.

Thanks for all the help. It helped me out alot.

Karen

01-02-2008, 01:10 PM

Okay, great. thanks for all the advice.
I am trying to find something that the guest can sign. I seen a big plate at the store that people can sign that says happy anniversary on it.. but I didn't care for that to much. It was to heavy and big. It would end up getting broken sooner or later.. I think.

I know at my graduation party I got a stuffed animal that everyone signed. I still have it till this day. It really means alot to me. so I want to do something like that for them.
Thanks for all the help. It helped me out alot.

Oh - as for something big people can sign ... when Paul's sister got married, they had everyone sign a big matt that they afterwards put their best wedding photo in, and it hangs in their living room. You could get a wedding photo of theirs enlarged and nicely matted and have at least a 3-inch matt all the was around, and people could sign that! And in silver marker have someone with nice writing write Happy 25th Wedding Anniversary!