Nathan 2

[sumbirdy]

I took Catty1's advice so this is the second part to "They came and took him..." hopefully signalling a better life for Nathan.

He is doing much better now and everytime we take him somewhere people comment on what a happy baby he is (he usually gives them a big smile). He loves to wave bye-bye. He's walking a little better but is not doing it exclusively. The doctor told us that the month Stephanie had him she set him back 2 or 3 months and to not worry about him walking because he'll catch up. His ears seem to be doing them a lot better and he doesn't tug on them as much.
He's still waking up 2-3 times a night but I think it's out of habit because he's much, much easier to get to go back to sleep.
He has a well-baby check up sometime this week or next week.
He's just started using a spoon sort-of right (he dips it in his food and then sticks it in his mouth but it usually doesn't have anything on it)

Charles-well, he's still being Charles

[Karen]

I am sure he'll catch up developmentally in no time. He'll be a much happier baby again, knowing he's a loved boy.

[sumbirdy]

Today he is 15 months old and he can walk better every day. He's really cranky today and got mad because I wouldn't let him go into the bathroom and play in the toilet. :rolleyes: He's into everything and today got in trouble because he was lifting the lid off of the trash and trying to get in.

But it's all worth it and I love him so much.

[sumbirdy]

Today is Charles' birthday. He's 22. And he's in...Indiana. lol. He went up there to visit his new girlfriend. :rolleyes: Hopefully he won't rush into anything with this one. The bad thing is that now Charles is thinking of moving to Indiana...with Nathan.

[sumbirdy]

Here's some pics that I just took. (Pay no attention to me in them.)

[sumbirdy]

And here's more...

[Karen]

What big eyes he has! A handsome boy for sure. What's he gonna be for Halloween?

[sumbirdy]

What big eyes he has! A handsome boy for sure. What's he gonna be for Halloween?

A hospital patient. lol He has the little gown.

[jennielynn1970]

Nathan is adorable! (and your pictures are fine! you look like my one cousin actually.... :) )

Hope Charles decides to calm his jetts and stay where he is for now so that Nathan can catch up and have a stable family life for a long time! Or, if he does decide to flit to Indiana, he goes alone! Smack him upside the head for me, lol, will ya?!

[sumbirdy]

Here's some more pics that I took a couple of days ago. The first one is him and my mom

[Catty1]

What a CUTIE!

Maybe Charles will decide to move to Indiana on his own first and see how things go. Give it 6 months, and re-evaluate.

hugs!

[sumbirdy]

Nathan's getting sick. He has the sniffles and a slight fever (not bad enough to worry about) He's been wanting somebody to hold him all day and cries about every little thing. He can't fall asleep unless he's in an upright position (I guess he feels like he can't breathe.) I'm hoping this is just a normal seasonal change cold.

[sumbirdy]

Well Charles is still in Indiana and today a police officer came out. Stephanie has filed a restraining order on him and is filing for a divorce. I don't know what the conditions of either are but I'm hoping Stephanie isn't going to try to fight for Nathan. And I wonder what lie she told to get a restraining order on Charles since they haven't seen each other for about 3 months. I can't bear for her to get Nathan again and I'm hoping that she won't fight. But if she does I hope she has enough against her and everybody sees that.

[sumbirdy]

We took Nathan trick-or-treating. He saw a girl dressed up as a zombie and freaked out. He started screaming and crying. Luckily we didn't run into anything as scary again. He wouldn't walk up to people and was acting really shy so I had to carry him. But when we got home he did go crazy over the candy (he's a little upset because I won't let him have ALL of it tonight) :rolleyes:

[Catty1]

I think Charles should go to the officer who brought the restraining order and say "THANK YOU!" :D

And he might want to get one against HER as well.

Glad Nathan had a good bunch of candy! Good for you for not letting him have it all! :)

[sumbirdy]

I think Charles should go to the officer who brought the restraining order and say "THANK YOU!" :D

And he might want to get one against HER as well.

Glad Nathan had a good bunch of candy! Good for you for not letting him have it all! :)


Charles is getting back Saturday and he called the guy and told him to deliver the papers here so we're getting them Friday. According to this guy nothing was mentioned of Nathan in the divorce papers and isn't it that if the child isn't mentioned they automatically go to the person who has custody of them at the moment? Or am I wrong?

Anyway, I'll try to post pics of Nathan in his costume sometime in the next couple of days.

[sumbirdy]

Stephanie tried to get Nathan today.
Luckily, there was a big NO slammed in her face. :D

She went to the police station and demanded they go get her son but they said they couldn't do that legally she would have to get a lawyer. So this officer called the house and told mom that Stephanie (actually he kept calling her Samantha) was b****ing about getting her kid back and mom could here her in the background saying that she was going to get Nathan and that she wanted her d*** baby (okay, seriously, who refers to their kid like that?) and so then dad got on the phone and told the officer that she was nuts (which he replied that he had already figured that out) and that she was abusive. The officer asked if Charles still lived with us and dad said yes and so the officer said that was all he needed to know and that there was nothing he could do.
The only thing I can figure out is that Stephanie found out Charles was gone so she thought she could do the same thing again and go get him and when the divorce was finalized she would have Nathan.

[Catty1]

It's good that the police officer knows she's a nut case! :rolleyes:

That will be on a report, and if a custody battle ever comes up...I hope S's lawyer will just tell her to FORGET IT.

Like some biological parents - she might get visitation later on if she gets a certain amount of court-ordered psychiatric help...but I seriously wonder if she is beyond that. She might be, and that is sad.

She was probably a happy little 3-year-old once...what the heck happened between then and now?

I'm not on her side or anything...ya gotta wonder sometimes how people get SO unhappy....

Sure am glad Nathan is with you! :D

[sumbirdy]

It's good that the police officer knows she's a nut case! :rolleyes:

That will be on a report, and if a custody battle ever comes up...I hope S's lawyer will just tell her to FORGET IT.

Like some biological parents - she might get visitation later on if she gets a certain amount of court-ordered psychiatric help...but I seriously wonder if she is beyond that. She might be, and that is sad.

She was probably a happy little 3-year-old once...what the heck happened between then and now?

I'm not on her side or anything...ya gotta wonder sometimes how people get SO unhappy....

Sure am glad Nathan is with you! :D

All I know is that she has been in and out of foster care since she was 4 years old. Her mother was a druggie and couldn't keep a job. As I have mentioned in the other thread we have talked to her dad before (her adopted dad) and he told us that they fostered her several times and she kept going back to her mom. He said she was always mean and lied about everything but he just thought it was because of the instability in her life. He finally decided to adopt her when she was 8 because he thought if he gave her a loving, stable environment she would change. Obviously that didn't happen and he said that adopting her was the worst mistake he has ever made in his life.

About the psychiatric help-she told mom once that she was never going to change-not for Charles and not for Nathan.

Oh, and there's something else I forgot to mention...about a week ago mom saw her in the grocery store with another guy and his baby (we know the baby was his because he looked about Nathan's age and they were black) The guy had his arm around her and she was saying "What kind of juice does mamma's baby want?" :rolleyes: I feel really sorry for that kid. Because of Stephanie Nathan has severe emotional issues (he won't go to sleep unless we are holding him, I guess so he can make sure that we'll still be there when he wakes) I wonder what she's going to do to that baby and I hope that guy she was with wakes up and realizes how she is before it's too late.

I just can't wait until this is all over and Charles has full custody and Stephanie is out of our lives. (Hopefully someday she'll be out of our lives, she's like a flea, preventable if your careful but once she's there, hard to make her go away.)



On another note we got Nathan a blow-up Spiderman chair. :D (Just hope it lasts, especially with the cats around here.)

[sumbirdy]

Stephanie is fighting for custody. We got the papers today and she lied on them saying that we wouldn't let her see Nathan and that we threatened her. She hasn't even tried to see or contact him. She also lied and said that Charles would be able to pay for any expenses Nathan will have in the future. Umm...he's between jobs right now so how is he supposed to do that?
So we're looking for a lawyer now and we have 11 days to find one. I'm basically looking for the lawyer because Charles isn't very bright (to put it nicely) and he has a habit of putting things off or just not doing them and saying he forgot. And this is really important.
Please pray that this all works out for Nathan. He's very happy now and she'll kill his spirit (not to mention she'll probably get really angry at him one day and end up killing him)

I've got to trust God and believe that he knows what he's doing. Maybe this is just His way of getting Charles' attention and saying "Hey, wake up! You have a son! Appreciate him. Fight for him."


"And whoever causes one of these little ones who believes in me to stumble, it would be better for him if a millstone were hung around his neck, and he were thown into the sea." Mark 9: 42

[Catty1]

Hugs and prayers! I hope Charles wakes up and realizes that his new romance won't solve anything - especially when his marriage isn't officially over and custody settled!

[sumbirdy]

Okay, haven't been here in a while (on this thread anyway). So here's some new pics we just took. About everything else I'm not real sure what's happening at the moment but I will update when it's all over.

[sumbirdy]

Well...Good news. They had a court date yesterday to see who would get Nathan during the divorce and Stephanie didn't even show. Charles got full temporary custody ( :D :D :D ) until April when it will come up again. Stephanie gets supervised visitation for 3 hours every Saturday.

Attached is some pics I took of Nathan at the park last Saturday.

[sumbirdy]

Here's some more...

[Catty1]

Good news! THAT will look really good when the final custody decision is made...she wants custody and doesn't even show for the HEARING. WOO HOO!
Glad the visitation is supervised, too. :)

How is Charles these days?

Those pics are SOOOO cute! :D Nathan is in the best place!

[sumbirdy]

Charles is actually doing a lot better than he was. Getting away from her abuse did wonders for both him and Nathan. (Nathan is back to being his happy self-aside from a few tantrums. He's back to just waking up once a night-and sometimes he'll sleep through the night. He is walking excellent now and just learned how to walk backwards today!)
But Charles is great and he was VERY happy yesterday when he got custody (as was everyone else)

[chocolatepuppy]

That's great news! Nathan is so sweet and he sure seems to be enjoying himself at the park. :)

[sumbirdy]

Well, she didn't show up for her visitation today...hmmm....I really didn't expect her to though

[jennielynn1970]

I'm glad things are going better for Nathan and Charles. Looks like Stephanie is just doing all the damage to herself at this point by not showing up to court dates or for visitation. Just make sure to document everything so that you can go back and say this is when she was supposed to be here, we called to confirm it (or whatever), and she never showed. Just so she can't say that you didn't make nathan available for her to see. Gotta love those manipulative types.

[sumbirdy]

I'm glad things are going better for Nathan and Charles. Looks like Stephanie is just doing all the damage to herself at this point by not showing up to court dates or for visitation. Just make sure to document everything so that you can go back and say this is when she was supposed to be here, we called to confirm it (or whatever), and she never showed. Just so she can't say that you didn't make nathan available for her to see. Gotta love those manipulative types.


Yep, we wrote down on the calendar "didn't show"

It was up to her to contact us since the visitation is at our house. She never called.

[sumbirdy]

I was browsing through my computer and found this pic of Nathan. He was about 2 weeks old. (That's Charles holding him) It's hard to picture him now as that little guy who's 0-3 months clothes were all too big for him. :eek: He's grown up so fast.

[Genny]

Hey, I have been reading about Nathan for a long time now , just never replied back before, but I just wanted to tell you that I'm glad you and your family have him now. He is so beautiful and looks so happy in all the photos you sent.

[sumbirdy]

Hey, I have been reading about Nathan for a long time now , just never replied back before, but I just wanted to tell you that I'm glad you and your family have him now. He is so beautiful and looks so happy in all the photos you sent.


Thank you, we are so very happy he is with us too.

[sumbirdy]

These pics were taken when he was about 14 1/2 months. I have about 9 more pics to upload but I'll do that later when I have more time. We're about to get ready to go to my grandma's to put up her tree (should be interesting with Nathan around, and they have LOTS of breakables :rolleyes: )

We got papers today saying when Charles' next court date is and it is in March. They're supposed to have some mediator (sp?) settle things between them but if that doesn't work out then they go to trial. (Which is probably what will happen.) And so far she hasn't tried to get in contact with us about her visitation this Saturday. Not that I thought she would.

[sumbirdy]

The poor baby got a flu shot today. :( And was sick half the day yesterday, throwing up. We've found out that he doesn't have baby "spit up" anymore. :eek:

Stephanie has informed us that she will be showing up every Saturday. BUT she wants the visitation to be at her house or a public place to "make it more convenient for us" :rolleyes: How is getting up extra early and dragging Nathan out into the cold every Saturday "more convenient for us"? And why would we have it at her house? It's up to her to show up to visitations, NOT up to us to get Nathan to her!

[sumbirdy]

Well, she showed up today. We had to endure 3 hours of her "mommy show" She tried to say that Nathan was the center of her world. :rolleyes: Yeah, so where has she been for the past 4 months? I didn't believe all the stuff that she was putting out. She tried to tell us that her dad told her that he wanted to see Nathan at Christmas. Wait...isn't this the same dad that claimed she shouldn't have a kid, and isn't this the same dad she didn't want to have anything to do with? And she kept talking about when Nathan "comes over" to her house. I didn't know if I could step in and say...umm, he's not going over there, so I just kept my mouth shut.
Nathan was friendly to her, he would smile at her and give her his toys...but he wasn't as friendly to her as he is to the rest of us. When she picked him up before she left to hug him goodbye (playing the "I'm so sad" card :rolleyes: ) he reached for me and wouldn't let her hug him. He knows who his family is and who loves him and to him she'll probably just be someone who comes over for a little while every Saturday. We're not calling her "mama" to him because it takes a lot more than just giving birth to a child to be a mom. And most definetly she is not even near the mom catagory.

[sumbirdy]

Happy New Year from Super Baby!! :D :p :) ;)

[sumbirdy]

Mom thinks Nathan has a speach impairment (sp?) By now he's supposed to be saying 25 to 50 words but he only says 4. Dog (Daw), Cat (Tat), What, and Yeah. We've been working with him and working with him but he just doesn't seem interested in repeating words. When he wants something he'll point at it and grunt and when we try to get him to say what it is before we'll give it to him he gets mad and starts screaming. I think what has us worried so much is that my 15 month old nephew, Eli, is repeating most things his parents say. But Nathan...doesn't. He doesn't even try. It might be off to a speach therapist for us.

[sumbirdy]

Here's some pics I took yesterday. My digital camera broke so you all are going to have to deal with the web cam for a while. I know their kind of grainy (ok more than kind of) and blurry. Sorry about that.

[sumbirdy]

Here's more.

[sumbirdy]

And more...

[sumbirdy]

My little Cowboy

http://i186.photobucket.com/albums/x46/dogsrule_birdy/JennifersCamera283.jpg[/IMG]
[IMG]http://i186.photobucket.com/albums/x46/dogsrule_birdy/JennifersCamera282.jpg

On his little ride-on toy. About a week ago he learned to go forwards! But he doesn't like to stay on it for very long. He'd much rather be running around!
http://i186.photobucket.com/albums/x46/dogsrule_birdy/JennifersCamera281.jpg

He fell asleep holding on to the craisins package! lol!
http://i186.photobucket.com/albums/x46/dogsrule_birdy/JennifersCamera268.jpg

I'll put more up soon.

[sumbirdy]

Sitting in his car seat. The car wasn't moving, that's why he's not strapped in.

http://i186.photobucket.com/albums/x46/dogsrule_birdy/JennifersCamera250.jpg

Charles and Nathan looking at an exhibit in our local nature museum.
http://i186.photobucket.com/albums/x46/dogsrule_birdy/JennifersCamera222.jpg
http://i186.photobucket.com/albums/x46/dogsrule_birdy/JennifersCamera219.jpg

Nathan and Smokey the Bear
http://i186.photobucket.com/albums/x46/dogsrule_birdy/JennifersCamera218.jpg
http://i186.photobucket.com/albums/x46/dogsrule_birdy/JennifersCamera217.jpg

[sumbirdy]

Nathan "riding a bear"
http://i186.photobucket.com/albums/x46/dogsrule_birdy/JennifersCamera216.jpg
http://i186.photobucket.com/albums/x46/dogsrule_birdy/JennifersCamera212.jpg
http://i186.photobucket.com/albums/x46/dogsrule_birdy/JennifersCamera209.jpg

[sumbirdy]

Sleeping in his car seat

http://i186.photobucket.com/albums/x46/dogsrule_birdy/JennifersCamera199.jpg

Bath time!
http://i186.photobucket.com/albums/x46/dogsrule_birdy/JennifersCamera198.jpg
http://i186.photobucket.com/albums/x46/dogsrule_birdy/JennifersCamera197.jpg
http://i186.photobucket.com/albums/x46/dogsrule_birdy/JennifersCamera194.jpg http://i186.photobucket.com/albums/x46/dogsrule_birdy/JennifersCamera190.jpg

[sumbirdy]

It seems that Stephanie is digging herself into a hole. It started with not showing up for the hearing and added to that now is only showing up for 4 out of 9 visits so far, not showing up for a mediation that was appointed by the JUDGE, and claiming Nathan on her income tax (tax fraud!) It says on the papers that the child has to be living in their home for 6-7 months and he's only lived with her for that 3 weeks back in July. She told us she could claim him because she bought him clothes (two, too big outfits last April) diapers (a very small package that mom had to force her to buy) and because she asked if he needed anything. If that's the case then I guess I can claim my other nephew! It's a load of crap and she expected us to believe it. :rolleyes:
IRS is going to have a field day with this one...

[Catty1]

Yep, let her keep on digging... :D

REALLY cute pics of Nathan at the museum and the others are lovely!

Your brother is a handsome man. I hope he gets well - and considers getting some counselling.

HUGS to you all!

[Lilith Cherry]

Nathan gets more handsome with every picture. I sure hope he gets to stay with your family and grow up happy and that his deadbeat "mother" keeps away.
Hugs to all of you! :)

[sumbirdy]

Ooops...make that 4 out of 10 visits. Yep, she's really digging a hole. On the visits she does make she keeps saying stuff that doesn't make sense to us. It makes you wonder if she actually believes the stuff she is saying. She also says stuff that makes herself look bad. She missed a full month of visits (4 in a row) and said she just had other stuff to do. And in that same visit, after a month of not seeing him, she told us she took her time to get there! And just this last visit she wanted to leave 30 minutes early.
Nathan hates her visits. He doesn't want anything to do with her and this last time he kept screaming because he wanted out of the room to go to his daddy. He would get into the hallway, and if he saw me following him he would reach his arms up to me and cry because he knew I would take him back. It's so sad to watch and I kept telling him I was sorry. It's horrible we have to put him through this. And he always has a bad night afterwards. :(

[sumbirdy]

Okay make that 4 out of 11 now. She didn't show up today because it was raining It's not even raining that hard. Just a light shower. Plenty of people drive in the rain. I really don't understand her. If it was me I would be making it to every visit. I would live for Saturday mornings and would be going crazy the rest of the time. As most of you know, those three weeks without him almost killed me. And she's got the chance to see him every week but doesn't do it.

Anyway, Charles' lawyer called him and said they rescheduled the mediation because Stephanie's lawyer said it was her fault for not being able to get in touch with Stephanie to tell her about it. Charles' lawyer mailed him the papers AND called. I know for a fact Stephanie carries a cell phone on her and I'm sure she has a mail box! She should make herself available. The next mediation is Feb. 21st and I wonder if they've been able to contact her for that one. She's making Charles' lawyer angry because she doesn't show up for anything, but hey, I guess that's better for us!

[Grace]

I pray for all your sakes, especially Nathan, that this gets resolved sooner than later.

It should be pointed out to the judge, family services that all of this is detrimental to Nathan.

[jennielynn1970]

Unreal how this "mother" is behaving. I really hope all works out for the best and that Stephanie does NOT get custody. It just slays me that she's so detached, and would skip a visit because of rain!

[sumbirdy]

Charles went to the mediation today. He said he was intimidated by Stephanie at first because she was calm when she walked in. The mediator asked them what they wanted and Stephanie started by saying she wants Charles to pay for her rent, she said he was still on the lease (they checked that out and he hasn't been on it since October) She wants him to pay for her phone bill (he's never used it) her credit cards (also, he never used) and at the end of this list came Nathan. She wants him for 3 nights and two days of the week. Which means Charles would get him more. Usually when people are fighting for their kids they want them MORE or the same amount as the other person. She also wants child support (which wouldn't make sense since Charles would have him more). Then it was Charles' turn to say what he wanted. He said first of all he wants full custody of his son, he doesn't care about other things, and he wants the divorce. He'll settle for Stephanie having SUPERVISED visitation but nothing more. (She said nothing when he said this) He said then that she was violent and tried to kill her mother (She said that was in the past and she's not like that anymore :rolleyes: )Then he said he wasn't going to pay her bills and she totally blew up. (Really proved Charles' point didn't it?) Charles said she was really loud and rude and kept going on an on about stuff that didn't make sense. She also made a very stupid mistake. The judge told the lawyers that he himself told Stephanie the date of the first hearing (the one she didn't show to) but in the mediation she lied and said the he didn't and she didn't know about it. THEN about two minutes later said she couldn't go to court because her boss wouldn't let her (what boss won't let someone go to court?) The mediator tried to tell her to stop talking because she interupted Charles but she kept going on and on. Everytime Charles tried to say something she would go off again. Charles said she looked like she could beat someone up. So she kept going on about stuff like she has a job and didn't know if Charles did (which he does) and she has a whole closet full of stuff for Nathan at her house (whoop-de-doo! we have a whole house full of stuff! You can't even walk through our house without tripping over stuff of his. And he's never saw the stuff she's apparantly got him.) So after this she finally stopped and said she was out of there. The mediator asked if she wanted to work things out, she said no. And then she stormed off turned around and said something along the lines of "I was going to let your parents be a part of his life, but not anymore! If you want a fight Charles, then I'll give you a fight!" (I really don't think she has much of a chance.) The mediator said that that was...umm...interesting and said she had to go file a report to the judge.

The session was scheduled for three hours...they were in there for twenty minutes.

[Catty1]

Okay, not only is she digging herself in...she just managed to dig herself a personal Grand Canyon! ;)

Good for Charles for saying his bit clear and to the point.

I wonder if she'll get court-ordered psych assessment...for about, say, 5 years?

What a pathetic, miserable and unhappy woman! It would be great if there were any hope for her - but treatment would have to be enforced by law for the first two years, at least.

Prayers for you and your family and Nathan - this is obviously going to work out, but it will take a little more time.

{{{{hugs}}}}

[sumbirdy]

Okay, not only is she digging herself in...she just managed to dig herself a personal Grand Canyon! ;)

Good for Charles for saying his bit clear and to the point.

I wonder if she'll get court-ordered psych assessment...for about, say, 5 years?

What a pathetic, miserable and unhappy woman! It would be great if there were any hope for her - but treatment would have to be enforced by law for the first two years, at least.

Prayers for you and your family and Nathan - this is obviously going to work out, but it will take a little more time.

{{{{hugs}}}}

I do hope she gets some help, but knowing her personally, I know she's beyond it. Everything she does has always been about money. Obviously it still is. She also said that after Charles pays off all her bills she wants him to start paying half of everything. She trips over her own lies as well. It's really pathetic. And I don't think I've met anyone quite as stupid. When Charles said he'd settle for supervised visits, the mediator asked where they would be and Charles suggested a park. So Stephanie said "What are we supposed to sleep at the park?!" :rolleyes: Who the heck said anything about overnight supervised visits? I don't even think there's such thing.

[sumbirdy]

Stephanie has obviously got some screws loose. (or as Charles' lawyer says, she's a wacko) Mom asked what she was going to do about visitation (you know, casually, just to see what she would say.) So Stephanie said that she and a friend were going to come get him on Wednesday nights and take him to another state where her friend lives, and that her friend would supervize! Correct me if I'm wrong, but wouldn't it be better for someone who is NOT a friend to supervize you? Friends tend to not say all that happened for you. And there's no way in heck she's taking him out of state! (According to her, her lawyer said this would be okay.) And then she turned around and started talking about weekend visitation. (?!) According to Charles' lawyer she has agreed to supervized visits, but she wants overnight. We just need to agree on someone to do it. Stephanie doesn't seem to care that going somewhere else for the night with people he doesn't even know would hurt him. Nathan's very sensitive. Plus, Nathan has a very exact bedtime routine, and there is only certain people he includes in it. If one person is not included in it, or if it is not EXACTLY how he is used to it being, he will cry and cry and won't go to sleep. Plus in the middle of the night he wakes up wanting to sleep with a CERTAIN person and no one else will do. (It's usually me, but sometimes he switches it around to where he wants Charles or Grandma or Pa Pa) Wonder how she would handle that? I don't think it would go over well. Mom suggested to Charles' lawyer that if this is what HAD to be done then Stephanie could come over every other Saturday night. That way Nathan is in his own environment and we know he's safe. I can gurantee I won't be sleeping.

They had a court date March 3. The lawyers and judge talked and it has been rescheduled to June 10 (2 days before my birthday). Here's to hoping she doesn't get what she's asking for.

[sumbirdy]

Here's a cute pic of Nathan in the snow. He really didn't like it at all so we didn't stay out very long.
Sorry it's so big. Photobucket wouldn't let me edit it.

<a href="http://s186.photobucket.com/albums/x46/dogsrule_birdy/?action=view&current=CRIM0151.jpg" target="_blank"><img src="http://i186.photobucket.com/albums/x46/dogsrule_birdy/CRIM0151.jpg" border="0" alt="Photobucket"></a>

[Lilith Cherry]

Lots of love to Nathan! I truly hope everything goes well and if his "mother" gets supervised visitation it is NOT overnight and is supervised by a proper court approved person. I will be praying for you all. Lots of loving thoughts, Lilith

[sumbirdy]

Nathan is 20 months today! I can't believe he is growing up so fast. Everyday he looks more and more like a little boy and less and less like a baby. I just wish he didn't have to go through all this and he can have a more normal childhood.

[Catty1]

You know, I haven't ever been a parent, though I have dealt with kids - I mean, they are people I also talk to! :)
However, I have read a few times over the years that even if a child has a terrible homelife (which Nathan has a great one with you), ONE great adult can make a difference - another relative, a teacher, any close adult.

Nathan has had to be near his mom a few times, I know...but his home is with YOU, and he has Daddy and all the rest of you.

LOVE and his knowing he is SAFE will do a lot - actually, I think it will save him from any real damage from his biological mom. ;)

[sumbirdy]

You know, I haven't ever been a parent, though I have dealt with kids - I mean, they are people I also talk to! :)
However, I have read a few times over the years that even if a child has a terrible homelife (which Nathan has a great one with you), ONE great adult can make a difference - another relative, a teacher, any close adult.

Nathan has had to be near his mom a few times, I know...but his home is with YOU, and he has Daddy and all the rest of you.

LOVE and his knowing he is SAFE will do a lot - actually, I think it will save him from any real damage from his biological mom. ;)


I really hope so.

I would add pics, but photobucket won't let me edit them, and it won't let me attach them here.

[sumbirdy]

Nathan went to the doctor today. What started out as just a visit to check his breathing (he's been raspy) and ears turned into a Hepititis A shot, his blood being drawn (apparantly it has become mandatory for all babies over 9 months, to check for lead and their blood count) and he now has a Nebulizer (sp?) he has to use 3 times a day. He cried worse over getting the shot than he did getting the blood taken. But the plus is, he got TWO suckers :p

[sumbirdy]

Nathan was diagnosed with Reactive Airway Disease (RAD) And He also has Pulmonary Hypertension which is something he was born with. He spent 2 weeks in NICU (during which time, Stephanie sat around the house and complained about the scar from her C-section) I read somewhere that people with Pulmonary Hypertension have a 2-5 year life span. I hope that's wrong but I know the disease can be deadly. :( He's been generally healthy all his life except for some breathing problems. What we're really worried about is if she (Stephanie) gets overnight supervision, she could suffocate him and then blame it on his breathing problems, it's something she would do, and she's already threatened to kill him, saying that if somebody else ended up with him and she only got visitation, she would kill him so no one could have him. I'm just praying this all works out, with the custody, and with Nathan's health.

[sumbirdy]

Nathan has a new little buddy for a week. Almost 3-year-old Christian (Charles' girlfriends little boy) Nathan's never been around other kids before. His only cousin lives in Deleware and since I stay home there's never been a need to put him in any sort of child care. It was very interesting. Christian is a ball of energy! I thought Nathan was bad but nothing compares to that kid. He is adorable though and when Nathan first met him he went up to him and gave him a hug. They got along mostly fine, except for Christian seems to be going through a stage where everything is "mine!" (He tried to convince me that my dogs were his, lol) They will be staying until Monday morning. Hope I'll make it through!

[Catty1]

That's great Nathan has a play buddy! :)

As for his health - I hope that since he is really young and generally healthy that there are some treatments for his breathing issues. Science is coming up with more wonderful things all the time.

So I'll add some PT Prayers to the mix! :D

(I hope Stephanie doesn't get visitation...does Charles' lawyer know about her threats?)

HUGS to you all!

[sumbirdy]

Stephanie showed up today. She acted normal and fine.....and then Christian came into the room. Suddenly everything changed and she started coughing and saying she was sick and was going to leave at 11:00 or 11:30 (she has 9-12) so that she wouldn't get everyone sick (wouldn't we be exposed to the germs since she showed up anyway? :rolleyes: ) Christian is hyper and he was running arond everywhere. And then Christian came up to me,pointed at Stephanie and said "I want him to leave" She has her hair cut real short and does look somewhat like a guy. lol. Christian then went to find his mother and said "Mommy, I'm scared. That guy (Stephanie) in there scares me." Shouldn't that tell us all something? A 3 year old only has to spend 5 minutes in a room with her (with someone else there) and he gets scared. Christian is not shy and he has never been scared of Charles or Dad or Mom or me.

Stephanie ended up only staying 20 minutes.

[sumbirdy]

Here's a few pictures. Enjoy!

Christian, Charles, and Nathan
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Nathan And Christian
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<a href="http://s186.photobucket.com/albums/x46/dogsrule_birdy/?action=view&current=100_1509.jpg" target="_blank"><img src="http://i186.photobucket.com/albums/x46/dogsrule_birdy/100_1509.jpg" border="0" alt="Photobucket"></a>

<a href="http://s186.photobucket.com/albums/x46/dogsrule_birdy/?action=view&current=100_1401.jpg" target="_blank"><img src="http://i186.photobucket.com/albums/x46/dogsrule_birdy/100_1401.jpg" border="0" alt="Photobucket"></a>

<a href="http://s186.photobucket.com/albums/x46/dogsrule_birdy/?action=view&current=100_1473.jpg" target="_blank"><img src="http://i186.photobucket.com/albums/x46/dogsrule_birdy/100_1473.jpg" border="0" alt="Photobucket"></a>

[sumbirdy]

Nathan and Uno. This has got to be one of my favorite pictures.
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Checking Uno's teeth. Nathan is obsessed with teeth (human or animal) and will examine anyone's teeth who will let him. Uno puts up with everything from Nathan (they are best pals) so of course, he's fair game!
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[Karen]

What a patient doggie Uno is! Thanks for sharing the pictures, Nathan looks a lot like his Daddy! He's gonna be a heart-breaker when he grows up, that's for sure!

[sumbirdy]

I have a funny story to tell! Every Saturday Stephanie thinks she has to tell us about her life (like we care) We usually don't pay attention, not really caring what goes on with her life. But this one REALLY makes her appear to be a nut. She should become a certified nut with this one.

Last Saturday out of the blue she started telling us how great her life was and this is what she said, "I really am doing good. I have a great life. I work all day and then I go home and take care of Nathan"
Excuse me, what?! Last time I checked Nathan was living with us! And if buying him some animal crackers and legos is called taking care of him then taking care of a kid is easy! When I called her on it, saying Nathan lives with us and how is she taking care of him she said "well, I buy him diapers" Nobody in this house has ever, ever seen even one diaper that she supposedly bought him. And he certainly hasn't ever wore any of them! So I guess I can go buy a box of diapers for-lets say-my nephew Eli in Deleware-some diapers he's never seen or worn, and say I take care of him. LOL.

Charles' lawyer said he'd be suprised if she got anything-and that's what we're shooting for-her getting nothing. But if she does get something, it's pretty much guaranteed it'll be supervized becaue....SHE AGREED TO THAT. The only thing is the person supervizing will be judge appointed (probably an advocate) and the place to meet is still up in the air. But we're still shooting for her getting NOTHING.

[sumbirdy]

When you think things can't get much worse-they do. Charles had a pre-trial today and Stephanie got unsupervized visitation. She gets to take him for 4 hours every Saturday. This Saturday she's supposed to show up at 12 so we can teach her how to give him his nebulizer treatement and then bring him back at four and do it herself at our house. Then every other Saturday after that until June 10 (the trial) she gets him at 1 and brings him back at 5. She's already made threats that she was either going to run with him or kill him. What was this judge thinking?! He said he wants to see how she does. Why give her a chance to hurt him? He just handed a child abuser a child. I can't shake the feeling that something bad is going to happen to him on one of those visits. This judge was supposed to be a good one, he's supposed to be in it for the kids. And Charles' lawyer didn't even fight this. He AGREED to it. :mad: With all the stuff against her, she still gets to have him alone? It doesn't make sense. Nobody is acting like they care, there's no way I can hand over Nathan to her Saturday, but I HAVE to, and in that sense I'm failing Nathan. That judge failed Nathan. She has LIFE INSURANCE on him and that scares me to death. If he dies she gets money, and she loves money. I just can't believe this has happened. I thought there was so much obvious stuff against her that no judge in his right mind would let her have him unsupervized. It could be worse, but I wish it was better.

God, where are you?

[Catty1]

Surely this can be appealed???? WHY would Charles' lawyer agree?

Sure, it's fine to give a person a chance - but NOT with the history Stephanie has. ONE VISIT and she could run off with him.

This is a head-shaker! I hope Charles and his lawyer have a good talk.

Wish there was a way to put a tracking bracelet on Nathan....omg...

Do you know any neighbours who could keep an eye out for him?

This just SUCKS. :( I hope something changes soon!

[sumbirdy]

Surely this can be appealed???? WHY would Charles' lawyer agree?

Sure, it's fine to give a person a chance - but NOT with the history Stephanie has. ONE VISIT and she could run off with him.

This is a head-shaker! I hope Charles and his lawyer have a good talk.

Wish there was a way to put a tracking bracelet on Nathan....omg...

Do you know any neighbours who could keep an eye out for him?

This just SUCKS. :( I hope something changes soon!


It can be appealed if Nathan seems disturbed after the visit. We're supposed to take pictures before he goes and after he comes back. If he has night mares we're supposed to right it down, and tell Charles' lawyer. But this is just the way our area works. They're not in it for the kids, and this place is a little crooked. According to mom, at the court house Stephanie was sticky-sweet. It all makes me sick.

[jennielynn1970]

Wow... I can't believe she got unsupervised visits! If Charles' lawyer agreed to it, wouldn't that be because Charles also agreed to it?? I'm just inquiring, because I thought a lawyer was there to speak for the person, not against them.

I really hope things go ok. I would be so worried, just as you are.

Sometimes I have no idea what the child welfare systems is doing in this country, let alone others. "Let's give the child abuser the chance to abuse again." That always make sense...:(:(

You and Nathan, and your family, will be in my thoughts and prayers.

[sumbirdy]

Wow... I can't believe she got unsupervised visits! If Charles' lawyer agreed to it, wouldn't that be because Charles also agreed to it?? I'm just inquiring, because I thought a lawyer was there to speak for the person, not against them.


Sometimes I have no idea what the child welfare systems is doing in this country, let alone others. "Let's give the child abuser the chance to abuse again." That always make sense...:(:(


That's what I thought too, but Charles didn't agree to that! I don't know...things seem a little screwy.

[Catty1]

You know, I just thought....she may not even show up, or show up really late...she's done that before.

It is a really stupid way for the court to 'call her bluff', but maybe they are doing that.

All she has to do is be LATE - and that will show how much the visits mean to her.

(Get a before and after pic of her too - with and without Nathan ;) )

[sumbirdy]

You know, I just thought....she may not even show up, or show up really late...she's done that before.

It is a really stupid way for the court to 'call her bluff', but maybe they are doing that.

All she has to do is be LATE - and that will show how much the visits mean to her.

(Get a before and after pic of her too - with and without Nathan ;) )

I think she'll be on her best behavior though. Apparantly her lawyer found legitamate excuses for her not showing up all those times. This week she has to have him back by 4, if she doesn't show by 4:01 we're calling the cops (suggested by the lawyer) Next week she takes him breathing stuff-and get this-he has to have it at 4, she has to bring him back at 5, she lives almost an hour away from us, it takes 20-25 minutes to fully give him his medicine. If she comes back on time she either a) didn't give him his medicine (or didn't give him all of it) or b) she didn't drive the speed limit to our house. And if she's late bringing him back, same thing, call the cops. It's something she should have considered if she was such a good mom.

[jennielynn1970]

This sounds horrible, adn I'm not sure it's even allowed, but is there any way to put some kind of nanny cam (tiny) on him? Or some kind of GPS locater thing, so that if something were to go awry, there would be a way to track him. I just don't like the gut feeling about this woman... If there is anything legal like that that you can hide easily, but to keep him safe, I'd see what is out there.

[sumbirdy]

This sounds horrible, adn I'm not sure it's even allowed, but is there any way to put some kind of nanny cam (tiny) on him? Or some kind of GPS locater thing, so that if something were to go awry, there would be a way to track him. I just don't like the gut feeling about this woman... If there is anything legal like that that you can hide easily, but to keep him safe, I'd see what is out there.

Well, that's something to think about. But the thing about her is, she has this thing about wanting to dress him and change his diaper and stuff, so she'd probably find it. Anyway, there'd be no time to do it before noon tomorrow. Just please, everyone keep him in your thoughts and prayers between 12 and 4 tomorrow, because for that whole time he's going to be in unsafe hands. :(

[Karen]

He'll be in our prayers. I guess sticking a radio tag in his sneakers wouldn't be doable, huh?

Mostly, he will be in my prayers that, come what may, he gets his breathing meds on time.

[sumbirdy]

Well things went okay today (thank God) She showed up late, she was supposed to be here at 12 and she showed up at 1:30 so she skipped his breathing meds instruction that we were supposed to give her. She did bring him back by 4 though which was a relief. Since she didn't get instructed on how to give him his meds she will be showing up at 12 and bringing him back (hopefully) at 4. We are still looking into a tracking device though. Just because she brought him back this time doesn't mean we can trust her to do it again. I think she'll be on her best behavior until the court date though.

[Catty1]

*whew* Good news.

So - do these visits go on for a little while until the actual court divorce proceeding?

I think you said you have to keep track on whether she is late or on time?

HUGS and I hope he continues to be safe. If ANYTHING happened to him - even not her fault - she'd be blamed and questioned, the first suspect. I hope her lawyer gave her a good talk.

Prayers that Nathan continues to be safe. Was he ok when she came to get him?

{{{{hugs}}}}

[sumbirdy]

*whew* Good news.

So - do these visits go on for a little while until the actual court divorce proceeding?

I think you said you have to keep track on whether she is late or on time?

HUGS and I hope he continues to be safe. If ANYTHING happened to him - even not her fault - she'd be blamed and questioned, the first suspect. I hope her lawyer gave her a good talk.

Prayers that Nathan continues to be safe. Was he ok when she came to get him?

{{{{hugs}}}}

Yes, they are every Saturday. Unfortunately. And yes she's supposed to be on time, especially to this one, which is when she was supposed to get instructed on his breathing meds, but she missed it. Her lawyer told her last Monday that she had to come to this one, no more excuses and asked her then if she had a ride and she said yes (she doesn't have a car anymore, it got totaled) But then when she was late she told us she had trouble finding a ride.

I was holding Nathan when she came and she held her arms out for him but he wouldn't go to her, he just turned his head away. I knew we had to give him to her but I just couldn't hand him over. So I set him on the ground and he ran away from her. I didn't see him in the car seat she put him in but dad did, and he said he didn't look happy. He was asleep when he came back though, but he seemed relieved to wake up and find us there and not her.

[sumbirdy]

Nathan is 22 months!

<a href="http://s186.photobucket.com/albums/x46/dogsrule_birdy/?action=view&current=CRIM0371.jpg" target="_blank"><img src="http://i186.photobucket.com/albums/x46/dogsrule_birdy/CRIM0371.jpg" border="0" alt="Photobucket"></a>

<a href="http://s186.photobucket.com/albums/x46/dogsrule_birdy/?action=view&current=CRIM0387.jpg" target="_blank"><img src="http://i186.photobucket.com/albums/x46/dogsrule_birdy/CRIM0387.jpg" border="0" alt="Photobucket"></a>

[sumbirdy]

Well, it's 3:15 and she never showed up. It would be a little late to show up now. She wouldn't have time to take him anywhere before she had to be back at 4. According to my parents and Charles at the pre-trial, her lawyer stressed to her that she NEEDS to come to these and that the Judge wasn't going to accept any more excuses. But I'm not holding on to that though. It seems like through this whole thing, since last July, Stephanie's been able to get away with everything. But I really hope this counts against her.

[Catty1]

Well, this shows how important her son is to her. Even if there IS a legitimate reason to not show, you call your lawyer/the family to let them know.

She won't get Nathan - she can't even find the time for a 3 - 4 hour visit?

Of course, her being a no-show is good in a way. :)

Take care!

[sumbirdy]

Things again seem to be working in her favor. They again got worse. Charles' last court date was yesterday. Stephanie gets Nathan for 6 hours every Thursday and in four months she gets to pick him up at 9 a.m. and keep him until 8 p.m. and then four months after that she gets all day Thursday, overnight, and all day Friday. And then four months after that she picks him up Thursday morning and brings him back Saturday morning, 2 nights. The judge is on her side. He was wanting to give her every other week. I bet if it was the dad who had done all the stuff she had done, then he would be limited to supervized, if that! The only good this is Charles can appeal it in four months. Not that it would do any good though, she'd probably end up getting more.

And this all starts tomorrow, on my birthday. Happy birthday to me. :(

[Catty1]

First, a couple of links: http://fatherhood.about.com/od/oklahoma/Resources_for_Oklahoma_Dads.htm

http://tulsafathers.org/ This looks like a "parked" site, but there is info on this site.

I think Charles had better get another lawyer - perhaps one that is into Father's Rights. This has info for Oklahoma.

http://www.fathersrightsnow.com/about/

From the site:
* As a father, you have the right to be influential in the life of your child.
* As a father, you have the right to interact, be involved, and spend wonderful time with your child or children.
* As a father, you have the right to love, nurture, and protect your child free from harassment from the mother. And, don’t forget that!
* As a father, you are entitled to decide where your children will live. Don’t think that this isn’t your right! It is. When DM (daughter’s mother) told me she was moving across country with our daughter, I promptly said, “Hell no!,” called my lawyer, and put an end to that nonsense.
* As a father, it is your implicit right to participate in the parenting of your child or children.
* Fathers have the right to see both school and medical records of their child or children. And, don’t forget that. When DM wouldn’t communicate with me about our daughter’s health, I contacted my daughter’s doctor. When the doctor wouldn’t communicate with me, I contacted my attorney. Then doctor communicated. You’ll notice a frequent pattern from me when resistance is encountered in the exercise of my parental rights: I call my attorney. And, fortunately, she’s a great attorney. And, you, please, get yourself a good father’s rights/custody attorney.
* It’s a father’s right to take part in his child’s extracurricular activities.
* It’s your right as a father to have custody, control, care and influence over your child or children. Even if the mother has residential custody, do not let that take away your fundamental right.
* It is your right as a father to participate in the selection of your child’s school.
* It is a father’s right to determine his child’s doctor, dentist, and medical treatment.
* It is absolutely, definitely your right as a dad to adhere to your beliefs and style of parenting during your visitation time. The mother has no right to interfere with this.
* It is a father’s right to provide discipline and guidance to his child or children. I’ll take this a step further and say that it’s more than a right, it’s your responsibility.
* And, finally, it’s Dad’s right to decide what is best for his child or children. And, don’t you ever forget that!

So, that list is a good starting reference for understanding the basics of father’s rights. Now, it’s important to understand that with father’s rights come father’s responsibilities.

http://www.fathersrightsnow.com/custody-basic-definition-and-distinctions/child-custody-state-laws/oklahoma-child-custody-state-law/

Oklahoma Child Custody State Law

Oklahoma Statutes Annotated, Title 43, Section 109 (43 O.SA Sec. 109).

The court shall consider the best interests of the physical and mental and moral welfare of the child. Children of sufficient age are permitted to express a parent preference. There is no preference for or against joint legal custody, joint physical custody, or sole custody, however the court will encourage shared parenting when in the best interest of a child. Custody is awarded based on a preference first for parents, then grandparents, then to third parties according to the best interests of the child. In cases of domestic abuse, it is presumed that it is not in the best interests of the child to have custody, guardianship or unsupervised visitation granted to the abusive person.

Parents may request or agree to joint custody, and the court shall order that if it is in the best interests of the child. The parents may submit a plan jointly, or either parent or both parents may submit separate plans. Any parenting plan shall include provisions detailing the physical living arrangements for the child, child support obligations, medical and dental care for the child, school placement, and visitation rights. In sole custody cases, any order providing for the visitation of a noncustodial parent must provide a specified minimum amount of visitation between the noncustodial parent and the child unless the court determines otherwise. Except for good cause shown and when in the best interests of the child, the order shall encourage additional visitations of the noncustodial parent and the child and in addition encourage liberal telephone communications between the noncustodial parent and the child.

[sumbirdy]

I haven't been on here in a while, so I'll catch everyone up.

Charles has allowed her to have her visiting hours but he has not allowed her to take him with her. The reason for this being that the first time she came out after the divorce was final she basically molested him. Nathan is uncircumsized so she thought she'd take it upon herself to pull the skin back. She pulled it so far back that it got stuck and started to bleed. Instead of being worried about that she continued to make perverted comments about his private parts. Mom got it unstuck and we took him to the doctor (without Stephanie) and he said that she very well could have scarred it and caused problems. She's getting angry at Charles for not letting her take him and tried to deny pulling Nathans skin back! But Charles was informed at the court that if he felt that Nathan would be in danger with her that he didn't have to let him go. He's only protecting his son. And we're still letting her see him.

In other news, we're now trying to potty train Nathan. He got some "big boy" underwear and his own potty.
He loves, loves, loves dogs, but unfortunately thinks all dogs will be as nice to him as ours are. Charles got him his very own puppies, Wally a Yorkie/shi-tzu and Samson a German Shepard/Great Pyranees. Of course no one's expecting Nathan to take care of them but he does like to help out by putting food and water in their bowls. And of course he likes to roll around on the ground with them. I'll have to post some pictures up soon.

[sumbirdy]

For Stephanie's extra day, yesterday we had a birthday party for Nathan at a local park. Me, mom and dad and Charles had each brought him one present for that day, but Stephanie didn't bring him a thing! All she did was buy the cake. She didn't even get him a present. Some of my friends over the internet, who haven't even met Nathan, are sending him presents for his birthday, but his own mother didn't even show enough interest.
She showed mom pics of Nathan from his first birthday, and mom said it was the saddest thing she had ever seen. Nathan looked so unhappy. His eyes looked so hollow. I remember the look in his eyes when we got him back last year. I remember it so vividly. In them was the look of someone who had seen to much pain, been through too much, it was not the look you expect a one year old to have. He lost his spirit during those three weeks and I thank God we got him back, that he is now the happy, spirited boy that he used to be. Everytime she's around though, he's not really himself, he retracts a little bit into his shell again.

Anyway, we're going to have his 'real' party tomorrow, on his actual birthday. We have our own cake, and we saved the presents we thought he'd like the most, plus since Charles gets his paycheck tomorrow, we're going to take him to pick out something else.

And I will post pics. Promise. :p

[Scooter's Mom]

For Stephanie's extra day, yesterday we had a birthday party for Nathan at a local park. Me, mom and dad and Charles had each brought him one present for that day, but Stephanie didn't bring him a thing! All she did was buy the cake. She didn't even get him a present. Some of my friends over the internet, who haven't even met Nathan, are sending him presents for his birthday, but his own mother didn't even show enough interest.


Perhaps it isn't that she didn't show enough interest, maybe she didn't have the money for a cake and a gift. And the photos will show the cake for many years to come. At 2, he won't remember that she didn't buy him a gift. But he will be able to look at the photos and know she was there and brought him a cake.

[jennielynn1970]

Just curious... who's Jaxon Lyric? (If I missed a thread, sorry!)

I hope things will go better for Charles and Nathan. It's good that he can decide whether or not Stephanie can take him, whether he feels it's safe or not. Obviously, from past experiences, it's not. What she did to him, where he had to go the hospital, that's just bizarre for a mother (or anyone) to do. Does she have any conscience at all? Ugh. Some people should just not be parents.

[sumbirdy]

Perhaps it isn't that she didn't show enough interest, maybe she didn't have the money for a cake and a gift. And the photos will show the cake for many years to come. At 2, he won't remember that she didn't buy him a gift. But he will be able to look at the photos and know she was there and brought him a cake.

Well, I would understand if she didn't have the money. But she's made a big show about telling us just how much she has meant for spoiling Nathan. And Nathan's not seen much of it. Whatever she does bring for him, she takes right back. And she even complained about buying the cake. And I know he won't remember, but it's just the thought. And when he does see those pics and the pics we took on the same day at the same place a question he might ask is "Why was I smiling for yours but not for hers?" He would not smile for her, not once. She had mom take a pic of her and him together and he tried to get away.

Another shocking thing she said to mom on the way to get the cake was that she would rather see Nathan dead than Charles. Why would any mother even THINK of that? And why would she rather her son die than her ex-husband?

[sumbirdy]

Just curious... who's Jaxon Lyric? (If I missed a thread, sorry!)

I hope things will go better for Charles and Nathan. It's good that he can decide whether or not Stephanie can take him, whether he feels it's safe or not. Obviously, from past experiences, it's not. What she did to him, where he had to go the hospital, that's just bizarre for a mother (or anyone) to do. Does she have any conscience at all? Ugh. Some people should just not be parents.

No there was no thread. Jaxon is my new little nephew, born on June 18. He is Eli's brother. They live in Deleware and I will be getting to see them Christmas! :D Since Eli and Nathan are only 2 months apart, I can't wait to see how they get along together.

[jennielynn1970]

Holy Geez... This Stephanie chick needs some serious psychiatric care. Wishing to see Nathan dead rather than Charles? First, why would you want either of them dead? Does she mean that if Nathan wasn't in the picture, she wouldn't have to be going through all this and her life would be simpler or something? I'm trying to think of what a wacko would be thinking!!

It's just appalling to me that this woman makes these comments, does horrendously abusive things to her son, and then gets to spend more time with him. What is wrong with the legal system??

I remember reading in other news articles how the same things happened, where the mother or father was deemed to be a hazard to the child, had a high probability of causing more harm to the child, and yet they gave that person more time in the custodial agreement. And then when something happened, and the child was hurt or killed, the courts were like, "Umm... Ooops." Seriously. They didn't give a crap, as long as they weren't going to be held responsible. They just said that they couldn't forsee what would happen.

I would be trying to find a way to discredit her once and for all. Isn't there any way she can be taped saying things, or doing things, or anything that would be legal and held up in court? I'd also still try to find a way to put some kind of tracking device in something that Nathan wears when he goes to see Stephanie (Karen's suggestion of in his shoe/sneaker was a good one).

There's got to be something. I'm just so sorry that you and your family have to be going through this, and Nathan, this might come back to haunt him years from now, which is just sad.


Apart from that...
Congrats on the new newphew!! Hope you get to see them all soon! I LOVE his name by the way, it's really cool. Wasn't there a movie or a song called "Jason's Lyric"?

[sumbirdy]

Holy Geez... This Stephanie chick needs some serious psychiatric care. Wishing to see Nathan dead rather than Charles? First, why would you want either of them dead? Does she mean that if Nathan wasn't in the picture, she wouldn't have to be going through all this and her life would be simpler or something? I'm trying to think of what a wacko would be thinking!!

It's just appalling to me that this woman makes these comments, does horrendously abusive things to her son, and then gets to spend more time with him. What is wrong with the legal system??

I remember reading in other news articles how the same things happened, where the mother or father was deemed to be a hazard to the child, had a high probability of causing more harm to the child, and yet they gave that person more time in the custodial agreement. And then when something happened, and the child was hurt or killed, the courts were like, "Umm... Ooops." Seriously. They didn't give a crap, as long as they weren't going to be held responsible. They just said that they couldn't forsee what would happen.

I would be trying to find a way to discredit her once and for all. Isn't there any way she can be taped saying things, or doing things, or anything that would be legal and held up in court? I'd also still try to find a way to put some kind of tracking device in something that Nathan wears when he goes to see Stephanie (Karen's suggestion of in his shoe/sneaker was a good one).

There's got to be something. I'm just so sorry that you and your family have to be going through this, and Nathan, this might come back to haunt him years from now, which is just sad.


Apart from that...
Congrats on the new newphew!! Hope you get to see them all soon! I LOVE his name by the way, it's really cool. Wasn't there a movie or a song called "Jason's Lyric"?

The only thing I can see for us to do right now is to just keep telling her no she can't take him. She's still able to see and visit him.
Another thing is she keeps shoving this teddy bear on him every time she comes over, oblivious to the fact that he doesn't like the thing. Every time she hands it to him, he pushes it away. He won't touch any teddy bear now.

Anyway, here's some pics. They're not all from his birthday.

[jennielynn1970]

How are things going with Nathan and his "mother"? (I use that term loosely!)

Hope all is well!!

[sumbirdy]

Well, she didn't come out the week before last, said she was sick. Nathan was sick this last Thursday and didn't want her to touch him (but she did anyway) Charles still isn't letting her take him, he still doesn't trust her. She told Charles she still loves him and then tried to convince him to let her take Nathan for a week (which he said no to). She told mom she could live without Nathan but she couldn't live without Charles. She tried to steal a pair of Nathan's shoes. She told mom she really liked them and they went with an outfit she has for him and that mom should just let her take them. Mom said no and she called mom mean. And then she tried to take them anyway. She shoved them into her diaper bag when she thought no one was looking and covered them up with stuff. I went over there and took them right out. She keeps lying about stuff that Nathan does or says. If you're around Nathan long enough you can predict if he was to say something what it might sound like. He pronounces all his k's, c's, ch's and ck's as t's, he can't say his s's or sh's and he almost always leaves a syllable off of words. (I'm Mer) She tried to tell us he said shicken (for chicken) We just now got him to say that he's two and she tried to say that a couple of weeks before his birthday he told her "I'm going to be two" He also doesn't talk in sentences yet. His a little behind in his speech. She lies about things that happen to people that were there. She tried to tell me that the guy across the road wanted Nathan to ride on his tractor and I was there, what the guy said was that Nathan didn't need to be around it while he was trying to work! I could go on and on but I won't

Basically she's still crazy.

[jennielynn1970]

One good thing for Nathan, on the subject of speech, is that when he starts school, they will screen him, and more than likely he'll receive services free of charge from the school district. Ours actually goes through the Intermediate Unit, and when there is a severe speech impediment, they get an IEP (which is an Individualized Educational Program), and it's something that is covered federally. You might want to see if he can even receive those services now. He might just be able to if he qualifies as a "high risk" kid (mom and dad split up, maybe one parent has a drug or alcohol problem (mom???), things like that). I've seen a lot of kids get some great services, and we're talking all the way up through middle and high school.

Is there an early learning day care kind of place he can go to, qualify for, like through income limits and stuff?? That might help, and maybe they can start something like the speech classes there. I'd see what your county has to offer for him. I'm sure his dad would have to sign him up, but if you can find the info, and get Charles to fill it out, or just sign it and whatever, Nathan might get a great boost in that speech area and other things!

Hope Nathan feels better!! Hugs to you both!

[sumbirdy]

One good thing for Nathan, on the subject of speech, is that when he starts school, they will screen him, and more than likely he'll receive services free of charge from the school district. Ours actually goes through the Intermediate Unit, and when there is a severe speech impediment, they get an IEP (which is an Individualized Educational Program), and it's something that is covered federally. You might want to see if he can even receive those services now. He might just be able to if he qualifies as a "high risk" kid (mom and dad split up, maybe one parent has a drug or alcohol problem (mom???), things like that). I've seen a lot of kids get some great services, and we're talking all the way up through middle and high school.

Is there an early learning day care kind of place he can go to, qualify for, like through income limits and stuff?? That might help, and maybe they can start something like the speech classes there. I'd see what your county has to offer for him. I'm sure his dad would have to sign him up, but if you can find the info, and get Charles to fill it out, or just sign it and whatever, Nathan might get a great boost in that speech area and other things!

Hope Nathan feels better!! Hugs to you both!

We tried to enroll him in speech therapy, but he didn't qualify. They said his motor skills are advanced and even though he doesn't talk right, he still understands almost everything you say.

[jennielynn1970]

You've got to be kidding me.

Well, hang on till an early learning program or something.

There should be something subsidized by the state or county for school. There is no way a teacher will let that one go by, and a good speech therapist will make sure he is seen.

Can you make a fuss?? If he is developmentally delayed in his learning and isn't where he should be, they really should provide services. It's that whole "No Child Left Behind" deal.

I'd dig further... he's entitled to something.

[sumbirdy]

Charles got a new job a couple of weeks ago at a private airport. Nathan got to go close to them, and he absolutely loves "panes" lol.

<a href="http://s186.photobucket.com/albums/x46/dogsrule_birdy/?action=view&current=CRIM0031-1.jpg" target="_blank"><img src="http://i186.photobucket.com/albums/x46/dogsrule_birdy/CRIM0031-1.jpg" border="0" alt="Photobucket"></a>

I was going to add more pics but my computer is screwing up and it won't let me upload any more on photobucket. I'll add them in a few days (hopefully)

[jennielynn1970]

I just adore Nathan! He's such a cutie!

Please give him a big hug from me!

[Catty1]

Oh, boy! Getting to see all the panes with Daddy!

He is just so cute! And I bet Charles feels better having a job - and not trapped in an office building!:D

[sumbirdy]

Oh, boy! Getting to see all the panes with Daddy!

He is just so cute! And I bet Charles feels better having a job - and not trapped in an office building!:D

Charles definetely feels better getting out of the house every day and getting some new friends. He works in the department that preps the planes for flight and Nathan gets to go see about once a week. The guys Charles works with adore Nathan and they let him get in the pilots seat of one of the planes (of course, we didn't have the camera with us :rolleyes:)

[sumbirdy]

Here's some more pics of Nathan. Sorry they're so big, but hey, it's not going to kill anyone to see big pictures of him is it? lol

<a href="http://s186.photobucket.com/albums/x46/dogsrule_birdy/?action=view&current=CRIM0029-1.jpg" target="_blank"><img src="http://i186.photobucket.com/albums/x46/dogsrule_birdy/CRIM0029-1.jpg" border="0" alt="Photobucket"></a>

<a href="http://s186.photobucket.com/albums/x46/dogsrule_birdy/?action=view&current=CRIM0028-1.jpg" target="_blank"><img src="http://i186.photobucket.com/albums/x46/dogsrule_birdy/CRIM0028-1.jpg" border="0" alt="Photobucket"></a>

<a href="http://s186.photobucket.com/albums/x46/dogsrule_birdy/?action=view&current=CRIM0021.jpg" target="_blank"><img src="http://i186.photobucket.com/albums/x46/dogsrule_birdy/CRIM0021.jpg" border="0" alt="Photobucket"></a>

[jennielynn1970]

*waves to Nathan*
Hi handsome!! It's nice to see those big smiles!! Big hugs to you, sweetie!

[sumbirdy]

And one more. Today he got a late birthday present from his Uncle Bobby (my oldest brother) and his Aunt Dana (they are Eli and Jaxons parents) I got a few pics and sent to them, because they're in Deleware and couldn't see his reaction, and this one is my favorite.


<a href="http://s186.photobucket.com/albums/x46/dogsrule_birdy/?action=view&current=CRIM0040-1.jpg" target="_blank"><img src="http://i186.photobucket.com/albums/x46/dogsrule_birdy/CRIM0040-1.jpg" border="0" alt="Photobucket"></a>

[sumbirdy]

*waves to Nathan*
Hi handsome!! It's nice to see those big smiles!! Big hugs to you, sweetie!

I'll give him his hugs from you first thing in the morning. :D

[Catty1]

He is GROWING! Some pics he still has the baby cuteness, but many others he is a 'handsome little man'!

I love that one of him on the bed being totally goofy!

THANK GOD he has you and your family.:love::)

[sumbirdy]

Yesterday Nathan got a sleigh bed and an Elmo comforter set. (Or "Melmo" in Nathan language) Mom came up with this neat idea of putting a personal, yet inexpensive decorating touch to his room. We got a Sesame Street coloring book, let Nathan color some of the pages and tore them out and hung them on his walls. It's Nathans own contribution to his room. I took a few pics of Nathan sleeping in his bed for the first time, but I don't have them on my computer yet. I'll get them on and post them sometime soon.

[sumbirdy]

Haven't posted in a while. Nathan's growing so much. I can't believe how smart this kid is. He can recognize and name the colors purple, blue, brown, black, white, grey, red, yellow, and green. And it only took him a week and a half. He can also recognize the letters T and C. He knows over 30 animal and object sounds (example of object sounds: ball says bounce, train says choo choo) And even though most kids his age are talking in sentences, I'm still excited (and proud) to say that he learned his first three: "I sorry" everytime he bumps into someone (or something) it's immediately followed with "I sorry" and "Let them out" (comes out sounding like "let em ow" lol) Everytime we have to crate a couple cats he runs up to the crate and says "let them out!" and the last one is "I fall" everytime he falls.
Stephanie tries to critisize us by saying that if she had him he would go to daycare, because he isn't learning anything at all here (as she talks baby talk to him, "Do you want a wok? (rock)" or "See that twee? (tree)")
Speaking of Stephanie, we think she's in jail. She had two warrants on her and they supposedly were served Friday. (Go to www.odcr.com and look under Aubrey, Stephanie. Also look under her former name Gould. Interesting)

Anyway, we're planning a road trip to Delaware around Christmas. That's where my oldest brother lives. Nathan will finally be meeting his aunt and uncle and his cousins Eli and Jax. Should be fun!

[Catty1]

Yow.

I read both reports. A couple of those are kinda scary.:eek:

How her lawyer could consider her a good full-time mom - or that she has the right even to unsupervised visits - escapes me.

I mean - Nathan might do well in daycare - but there'd have to be strict regulations as to who picks him up. One idea is to have a "secret password" that anyone picking Nathan up has to know. And change it frequently.

But boy, he sounds SOOO smart! And WHAT a CUTIE!

I hope and bet Charles is really enjoying being a dad more and more.:)

[sumbirdy]

Nathan went for a checkup today and they found that he had a heart murmer (sp?) :( Please pray for our little guy that it doesn't get any worse.

[sumbirdy]

Every year a woman in our town hosts a halloween party for the kids. It's held at our community center. The idea is for it to be a safe place for the kids to go. She never hosts in on Halloween however. Why? Because about ten years ago her son was killed on Halloween night while going trick-or-treating. She won't do it on Halloween, but she does do it to honor her sons memory and to keep kids safe. And it's completely free. Tonight was the night for it this year. We took Nathan in his duck costume (and of course, forgot the camera) He played all kinds of games, but there were two he kept going back to over and over. That pick-the-duck game (forgot the name) where you pick a duck out of the "pond" and whatever color or number is on the bottom, you get to pick a prize out of the matching bucket of prizes (They even let him keep a duck when things started slowing down) He went to that about 10 times. And the one where you toss the bean bag into the hole. On his first round he got two out of three in (of course they let him stand real close to it) He was so proud of himself. In the 5 or 6 times he visited that one he usually got at least one in, except for one of the times. He didn't get either of the first two in, so with a sigh of frustration, he just walked up to it and stuffed it in. That got a good laugh from the people that were running it, and got him one of the bigger prizes. I wish we had had our camera. There was only one bad thing about the night. There was this woman running one of the stands (bob for apples), who used to work for dad. Apparently they had gotten into an argument when she worked for him. Tonight she basically took it out on Nathan. There were kids his age there who she let just stick their hands in and get an apple and then get a prize, but she wouldn't let Nathan, then after all the apples were gone she was just giving away the leftover prizes, and me and Nathan walked up, she just stuck her nose up and said all the apples were gone and he couldn't get anything now. We didn't make a big deal of it, I don't want Nathan growing up thinking he can do whatever to people just because they do it to him. I want him to be nice. They're always going to be people who don't like him (whether his fault or not) and then there are going to be the people who are more than happy to overload him with candy and praise him tremendously when he gets his beanbag in hole. I think we should all learn to focus on the candy people. :p

[jennielynn1970]

Awe, I'm glad he had such a good time! And bad auntie, you didn't grab a camera! Don't you know that's part of your duties??

As for the grumpy apple woman, let's hope she went home to the last apple and she got a worm!

[sumbirdy]

And bad auntie, you didn't grab a camera! Don't you know that's part of your duties??




Yes, I know. I had set it on the table, ready to take with us. I was even talking to Nathan about all the pics I would take. And then....walked off without it. Completely forgot. And didn't realize until we were there.

[jennielynn1970]

Well, that just means you'll have to get more when he goes trick or treating!! ;)

And of course post them all!!! :)

[sumbirdy]

I again forgot to bring the camera :o I wouldn't have gotten good ones anyway, he was not happy. Refused to smile or talk to anyone. Wouldn't walk up to anyone's house. HAD to be carried. NOT a good halloween for this little guy. Hopefully next year will be better. So I took a couple when we got home. Excuse the mess in the background. I obviously need to fix the dates on the camera.

Bouncing around. "So full of candy!"
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Waddle, Waddle
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I was looking through my pics on the computer and found these from before all of this happened. He was about 7 months old here. SO chunky! :p
<a href="http://s186.photobucket.com/albums/x46/dogsrule_birdy/?action=view&current=ANIMALS_AND_NATHON96.jpg" target="_blank"><img src="http://i186.photobucket.com/albums/x46/dogsrule_birdy/ANIMALS_AND_NATHON96.jpg" border="0" alt="Photobucket"></a>
<a href="http://s186.photobucket.com/albums/x46/dogsrule_birdy/?action=view&current=ANIMALS_AND_NATHON103_EDITED.jpg" target="_blank"><img src="http://i186.photobucket.com/albums/x46/dogsrule_birdy/ANIMALS_AND_NATHON103_EDITED.jpg" border="0" alt="Photobucket"></a>
And about 10 months old here.
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[jennielynn1970]

OMG... what a cutie pie he was (not that he's not now, lol)! Those chubby cheeks just kill me!

I love the costume, so cute! Hope he will have more fun next year.

I was never a Halloween person, always hated dressing up... but that is just me. I also am not a fan of parades or the circus either, lol.


Tell Nathan I think he looked just ducky, and give him a big hug for me. He's just too darn cute!

[sumbirdy]

Here's some recent pics of Nathan. I was looking over these pics and they almost made me cry. He's looking so much like a little boy and so little like a baby. Where'd the time go?

Close up
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He thought it was incredibly funny to stand on me.
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He grew up so fast!
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Silly face
<a href="http://s186.photobucket.com/albums/x46/dogsrule_birdy/?action=view&current=CRIM0037-2.jpg" target="_blank"><img src="http://i186.photobucket.com/albums/x46/dogsrule_birdy/CRIM0037-2.jpg" border="0" alt="Photobucket"></a>

Thanks for looking

[Catty1]

Awww, what a sweet LITTLE BOY! :D

I can't believe how fast the time has gone either! He is sure thriving in your care. :)

[jennielynn1970]

He is such a cutie! I just want to give him a hug!

[sumbirdy]

Well he is a hugger! lol

And he is really sweet (sometimes) If someone so much as coughs he rushes to their side and asks Are you okay? (Which sounds like "you tay") My brothers friends were down last weekend and they have a 3-month old boy. Nathan wanted to hold him. He kept holding his arms out "Me carry" and trying to tug at the baby's legs.

I believe he'll be a future PT'er. He LOVES animals. Especially dogs. We're trying to teach him now that he can't just run up to someone's dog and pet them without asking (and also, not to have a fit if they say no, lol)

[sumbirdy]

I took this today.

<a href="http://s186.photobucket.com/albums/x46/dogsrule_birdy/?action=view&current=CRIM0053-2.jpg" target="_blank"><img src="http://i186.photobucket.com/albums/x46/dogsrule_birdy/CRIM0053-2.jpg" border="0" alt="Photobucket"></a>

[sumbirdy]

Well we have gone to Delaware and been back. We all had a blast. Especially Nathan since he had someone his size to play with (see attached picture of him and cousin Eli, also I've attached a picture of 6 month old Jax and my brother Bobby) Nathan was a bit of a bully towards Eli, he kept thinking he could play with him like he plays with the dogs, but Eli's not used to rough play. But on the contrary, Nathan was EXTRA gentle with little Jax. He would bring him toys to play with, and try to play with him if he started fussing. It was really cute. I have a pic somewhere of them two together, I just can't remember where the camera is. He got TONS for Christmas. We haven't even brought it all into the house from the car yet. We haven't heard from Stephanie since the first of December. She never seems to concerned about coming out and Nathan hasn't seen her since the middle of October. Charles is jumping from one girlfriend and house to the next and (get this) is calling me and my mother EVIL (:eek:) for not letting him drag Nathan around with him.

Anyway when we got home everyone got sick with a horrible virus. It's really weird because part of it is that you get REALLY hungry but then after you eat you get REALLY sick again. It's like a never ending cycle. Also it makes you want certain foods. I am finally over it (thank God) and all I wanted was Jello and Sprite. My parents and Nathan still have it. Nathan just wants dairy products, cheese, milk, yogurt and such. But he can't understand why I keep getting him to drink water and I won't let him eat much at a time. (I figured it out that if you don't eat much when you get to the really hungry stage, you don't end up throwing it back up) I've caught him several times raiding the fridge. He just don't understand why this is happening. He's had it for about a week now and he's generally okay in the morning (very hungry though) and puking in the evening. :( It's been like that every day. This stuff makes you very sleepy too and a couple of days ago he slept from 2 p.m. to 6 p.m. woke up for five minutes, slept until 9 p.m. woke up for 30 minutes, slept until 5 in the morning, woke up for 15 minutes and then didn't get up again until 9:30 that morning:eek:

[sumbirdy]

Here's some new pics. He got his hair cut!

Helping me clean out the car
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My brother is building a pond for my mother and Nathan loves to dig around in the dirt with him. He even found a worm who he named Freddy. He later set him free though.
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