Bankruptcy - Just ranting to keep sane UPDATE: apr 28

[king2005]

I'm filing tomorrow :(

I'm really sensitive right now...

I cannot keep living like I am, the 3 of us have done everything to try to stay ontop. Chad's old boss filed bankruptcy so no one got paid & everyones pay cheques have been cut for a long time & Chad kept getting the worst... Now we're toast. We're all getting nasty calls from collectors.

We were doing so good for a while, then it was like a bomb went off & everything went down hill from there. We didn't have food for a month.

We're even loosing our home :(

We have a place to go in London, which sucks, I just made so many friends here. My friends are awesome though. They know I screwed up, I admit it 100% its my fault. When I come up short on an outting, they pay my way. This weekend I was invited to a special party. I had enough for transit, admission & a couple drinks. Joe gave me hair dye & they hooked me up with a friend for clothing (there is a very strict dress code). One guy in the group met me for the first time, & he bought me a couple drinks.

2 weekends ago I had NO money, not a dime. Joe invited me out sat evening. I said no, I cannot afford transit this weekend. I can hang out with you when you get back... he said No I have money, hurry & get over here, I want my Crepes lol So he paid my transit fairs to get downtown Toronto. We got to the Crepes place & he told me to order something... I made up a BS lie & said I wasn't hungry I already ate. He knew I was lying & told the cashier, SHE wants something!!! How sweet eh :)

One of my friends has already said that he wants me to crash at his place on some weekends (not every weekend) so we can all go out & do our usual random weekends :D

So the world hasn't ended yet. I can see the end, but I'm trying to stay away from it.

I took tomorrow off as I need the whole day to keep sane. I'm praying so hard that they don't take my car. I need it for work & I love it so much, its my first car & well I really need it... thats my only worry... all the pets are just fine, plenty of food & things they need. I've always bought their food in bulk & never let it get depleted... The place we're going to in London said all our pets are welcomed, so no worries there.

I'm so stressed, I really don't want to go to london, but I don't like my other options either... I feel stuck. I really don't know what to do... I'm honestly thinking of just finding a rat hole & living there alone. Depending on how tomorrow goes, will finalize my decission. I know for a fact that if I move to a rat hole here my friends will all help me move, a couple of them have cars & the rest will help me pack up & move the stuff to storage & the rat hole. The more I type here, the more & more I'm wanting to stay here... Cause if I lose my car, then I can take the transit to work. But if I lose my car & go to London, I lose my job.

I feel like I'm rambling.. doubt I'm making much sence. Haven't slept right in weeks & haven't gotten much sleep the past few days... I'm always awake & staring into space thinking. That darn illness is back too, the same one I had from Aug - Dec... I think its stress related, hopefully it'll go away soon, cause I hate this illness. My lungs start to hurt (they feel tired) & I get shakey... My friends noticed my shaking this weekend.. I told them it was because I was drunk (I was fuzzy, but not even close to being drunk to be shakey)...

Still haven't told my dad anything... I told him not to ask me private things & not to call me & not to mail me anything... I need to deal with some things... I told him Cristine is helping me (my sister) so I'll be ok... I'm going to talk to my sister about opening a FIDO account for me, so I can have a phone... Unless the bankruptcy wont effect it. I hope it doesn't... I know my sister will do it for me, shes letting me use her home address as my own, so I can afford my car insurance. I really don't know what I'd do without her. She already told me that if I get into major major problems & lose everything, I can move in with her & Sean. All my pets but the rats can come, cause her cats will kill them. So I'll never be 100% screwed, just 99%.

I'll try to keep this updated, but I don't know how often I'll reply. I have so much work here at work & I'm so behind (so is my partner), as there is only 2 of us doing a 3-4 man job. The 2 of us have taken over 2 departments. This new work is a lot of fun & we enjoy it all, we really do... We're not getting into any trouble for being 20 days behind in our older job, as our stats there are WELL above what they should be... This new job is 95% more important, as its live & has a time limit (which we're almost meeting WOOHOO!!)...

Thanks for letting me rant & getting this off my chest.

[Pawsitive Thinking]

I don't know what to say really......you seem to have some very good friends who want to support you through your troubles and your sister will do all she can to help.

You will come through this - good luck

[Catty1]

Jess - please check out the province's medical income support. Do you still have the link I sent you?

You'll be able to get the care you want without having to wait for some workplace insurance plan.

This all sounds awful...but at least you can start all over again. It might be a relief....

HUGS to you!

[joycenalex]

jess, i know 3 people who have filed for and lived through bankruptcy. it is meant for a second chance. learn what you need to, be gentle to yourself.

[wombat2u2004]

Sounds like you do have a lot of support out there King. Take the help that they are offering you, as it sounds to me that they are genuine, and love you, and want to to help you. I'm sure they know in their own hearts that you would do exactly the same for them....it's what mates are all about, they figure you are worth it.
All the best to you,
Wom

[Trinityagain]

I have to chime in as I was there about a year ago. I too admit it was my own fault. I was close to filing for bankruptcy. What I did instead was something that is basically a restructuring plan. Don't know if they have them up there. It took all of my credit, talked to the creditors, took the payments and interest to the lowest the creditors would accept. If left on my own it would have taken me close to 20 years to pay everything off and that is only if I didn't add anything else. (yeah right!) With the plan I will be paid off in a little over 3 years and save a ton on the interest. I kept my car and everything. Like I said I don't know your complete circumstances but it might be something to look into...and feel free to rant all you want. PTers make really good listeners....just make sure to take a few minutes to yourself. Don't let it get you down, there is light at the end of the tunnel, it's just a little dim right now but it will get brighter! PM me if you want to talk.....

*****HUGS******
Trinity

[JenBKR]

Oh Jess, I'm so sorry. Life certainly seems like a roller coaster sometimes, doesn't it? I'm glad you have a good support system. ((((hugs)))) You are in my thoughts and prayers.

[king2005]

I cannot get my payments lower, I have begged for help from them & they keep telling me tough shat now pay up! I need to make an agreement with my car loan company. I'm hoping they'll accept my offer... if I pay them early (like tomorrow), they'll close my current account, let it go into bankruptcy & then open a new one with what I owe, BUT will say they wont bother me cause I'm in bankruptcy IF I pay on time from now on... if I have to pay 1 month a head I'll do that. I want THAT car, they want MY money & I have been good with them so far. SO I think we can make an agreement that suits us both

[king2005]

My car has to go :(

[Catty1]

Jess - check the Yellow Pages under Credit Counselling or ask your bank person about it.

They do what Trinityagain mentioned - several different plans...

[JenBKR]

Jess - check the Yellow Pages under Credit Counselling or ask your bank person about it.

They do what Trinityagain mentioned - several different plans...

I agree, have you looked into credit counseling at all? You'd be able to keep your car, and the credit counseling agency will be the ones to negotiate with your debters. Have you already filed for bankruptcy? ((((hugs)))) and I really hope everything works out for you.

[king2005]

The bank already told me no. There is also just too much stress with these bills I can no longer pay.

I do have good news. We found a place for 800.00. Its in a VERY VERY nice neighbourhood. Its a beautieful basement apt. There are a couple flaws, but he was up front about them. Its older wiring so you have to evenly distrubite power through out the house. There are 2 lights acting up. We're going to take a peek at them, as we want that light replaced with ours. if that solves the issue, great if not, the landlord will have someone come in to fix it.

The dryer is acting up, so we offered to bring ours over. Our washer is also larger, so we offered to let him store that washer in our storage space & we'll put ours there. He liked that idea, we said it'll give him time to replace them with new ones, so it doesn't have to cost him a lot of money all at once.

The landlord (2 people own it) had put in so much money into the home as the people that were upstairs a couple years ago, bred pit bulls & trashed the house (very costly).. the last person that was in the basement also trashed it, so a lot of things are all new... He has a very good family upstaires & revolves all the tenets in the basement around them. We want to meet the family & introduce them to Bear so they aren't scared of her because of what bred she is... The landlord cannot wait to see Bear, as he is excited that shes a calm & quiet dog. Which she is, she never barks, wont eat the house & wont harm strangers. We want the people upstairs to feel comfy with us there.

The landlord is cool with the 3 of us there. To help him feel comfy (most landlords are very wary about 3 adults) we said to add in the lease, its only to be the 3 of us living there. Friends can come over, but it cannot be a hangout.

I'm quite excited about this place

[wombat2u2004]

Good on ya mate....that should ease things a bit for you.
Wom

[jackmilliesmom]

Hope it works out for you Jess good luck and take care!

[king2005]

Current update:

I get to keep my car!!! BUT only if I can get everything up todate on it with my finance company. My finance company has written a letter to my Bankruptcy company insuring all will be well as long as I do not get behind & am online! I have until July 1st to get 100% caught up.. I'll be caught up on friday :D I'm sooo happy!!

However I went to the bankruptcy office with my sterio, amp & woofer removed.. Only to have the agency fight for my car, esp after they found out about my super low payment (169.00/month).

We are almost moved into our new place... I have mango in his tank in my new bedroom... Axles Pond is beside the tank set up, but Axle is still at the old place.. I didn't have enough room or time to pack him up. Lilly is still at the old place... I just have to add the pond filter & get my dressed upright, then I can bring Lilly to my new home.

Yesterday we had guests at our old place while packing up, Karen I know very well, but had never met Will. I know Will's snake very well, as I've fed her (she lives with Karen as Wills home isn't stable yet, so Shimmer staying at Karen's is best)... I told Will about my turtle & he HAD to see him... he LOVED Axle & wanted to hold & touch him.. He took a couple photos... Then I told him about Lilly my Rose Hair Turantula... & Guess what!! Will showed me how to pick up & hold Lilly!!! OMG I got to finally hold my girl... I was so excited, as I've wanted to hold her since day one, but have been scared of her & didn't know how to handle her properly... Now I know & plan to have her out all the time at my new place :D I've been all goofy since then, cause I was so down cause I couldn't hold her.... hehehehe She tickles so much & is such a calm & gentle girl :D I knew I picked a good girl. Will also loved her colouring, nice & bright

[Pawsitive Thinking]

Call me stupid (and I'll thump you :D ) but I see these as positive signs that everything is going to turn out okay for you

[king2005]

I see them as positive as well, but its still a kick to the 8@lls, if you know what I mean.